I do not own Sailor Moon or any of its characters.

Chapter 1: No Words for a Goodbye

"Sometimes you just have to be there, Mamoru," she squeaked.

'That is such a girl thing to say,' he thought at her. "What the hell does that mean! I'm there every day, Usako – we live together! And Tuxedo Kamen's there whenever you're in danger. I don't get where this is coming from."

"Lately I don't know what we're even doing together," she confessed quietly.

"Wha-" Mamoru felt a pang in his heart and was struck speechless.

"Well think about it. We have nothing in common! You like to sit and read and clean and, gods, study! And I just wanna dance and play games and sing karaoke and go to the mall with the girls and… I mean, you exercise for FUN Mamoru! And me, I don't even have a library card." At that point Usagi knew she sounded a little desperate and irrational, but she was also making sense.

But Mamoru wasn't having it; he practically screamed at her, "We love each other! That's what the hell we have in common Usagi!"

Usagi's lip quivered as she looked like she'd just been smacked. Her face contorted automatically into that wounded-puppy look. Mamoru stared into her eyes; all he'd said was that he loved her.

'Enough pretense.' "Did you-" Her true train of thought was about to surface, she simply couldn't put the question off any longer, "did you love me before the fight in Queen Beryl's palace?"

Mamoru, after a moment of shock, could only look hard at the floor as if searching for his mind in the carpet fibers.

"Darn it Mamo-chan, tell me!" Usagi voice squealed, Usagi's eyes begged.

Mamoru's eyes snapped up but they were darkened, empty. "I-I know I've loved you for a thousand years," he began hopefully, "But, you and me?" His already shaky voice dropped to a whisper. He loved Usagi for who she was, not for the princess she used to be – they were such different girls, and he still loved her, but did he then…did he honestly? "Usa, I – damnit I can't be sure. I don't think I remember." And he didn't. 'Did Usako exist before I remembered Serenity?' He had sealed his grave.

Usagi didn't know what to say. She remembered loving Mamoru-baka clearly; she'd done so since the first time he called her Odango Atama, and now she couldn't tell what she had believed when she'd started this conversation. Had she been testing him? Had she known the truth? Had she been ready to hear the answer? It no longer mattered, because now she knew, and sweet as it sounded, she couldn't take that knowledge back. Her mind decided for her that if he didn't know it meant no. And it was better she got out now, and for Mamoru there was no way to stop her, they both knew it.

She stepped up on her tiptoes and kissed Mamoru, probably with more passion than she ever had; his right hand cupped the back of her head and his left arm snaked around her, pressing her to him. A tear fell down his face, but it wasn't from her – Usagi was past crying.

Mamoru's heart broke a little more each instant he held her. He knew this would be the last time he would kiss his soul mate…unless he could somehow prove he had loved his Odango then as much as he cherished his Usako now.

AN: This may or may not be a one-shot. It's just something I had to get off my chest.