Howl's Honeymoon
Markl was hungry. And cold. And disappointed. He had forgotten it was Calcifer's half-holiday. Since the fire demon got his freedom, they had to light an ordinary fire some of the time, and Markl didn't fancy getting his fingers burnt. Master Howl could get it going just by looking at it, but every time Markl tried that, it just made his eyes water, and that wasn't much fun either.
He couldn't believe Sophie wasn't up to make the breakfast. The food had been much better since she came (apart from the vegetables and the fish). She had never missed a day. Where was she? He banged on her bedroom door.
"Sophie!"
No reply. He pushed it open.
"Sophie, I'm hungry."
She wasn't there.
The room was immaculately tidy (everything Sophie touched was) and the bed was neatly made with the pillows fluffed up. Markl couldn't see anything missing, but the sight still panicked him. Sophie had been acting a little strangely over the past few days. He wondered if this was about the Witch of the Waste. She was away too. Rumour had it that the prince had returned, and the old lady just couldn't resist the prospect, even in her state of infirmity. Master Howl said she would be fine but Sophie hadn't been so sure. Had she gone after her? Markl's breath came in shorter and shorter bursts. Sophie couldn't leave them on their own. It would be chaos.
He ran for the stairs. "Master Howl! Master Howl!"
The bedroom door slammed open as Markl burst through it.
"Master Howl, it's about Sophie!"
"Markl, get out of my room!"
An angry figure jolted upright in the bed, the eyes glittering with annoyance. Somewhere in the ceiling, thunder began to rumble. Master Howl was not a morning person.
"But it's Sophie. She's gone."
"Get out of my room, Markl."
The voice had softened, but the eyes had narrowed and the earrings were swinging, pendulum-like, with suspended motion.
Markl scowled and slammed the door. If that was the way Howl was going to treat him, he'd give him something to thunder about!
xxx
Howl groaned and flopped back on the pillow. Beside him, there was a sigh and a soft rustle of sheets. He turned over and smiled slyly.
"Why, good morning… Mrs Pendragon."
Sophie opened her eyes. They were so brown, so gentle. He couldn't imagine why she had ever thought she was plain. As delicately as possible, he leaned across and kissed her.
"Howl, why is Markl crying?" said Sophie.
"He burst in on us and I sent him out," Howl snorted. "But he's gone now."
"We have to tell him."
He twisted her hair in his fingers. "But why? It's so much more fun like this."
"Are you still a coward?"
"Only when it comes to you, Sophie."
He tried to kiss her again but she stopped him. When that look came into her eyes, he could swear "Grandma Sophie" had returned.
"I thought we were a family. We shouldn't have secrets."
"Trust me, Sophie. It won't be for…" He leapt up suddenly. "He's using the summoning spell! I've told him a thousand times!"
"Howl, please. Let me go to him."
He would have rushed out of the door, blankets and all, but Sophie was already getting her clothes on. He was so pleased she let him pick out pretty dresses for her now. She really was getting lovelier every day. Markl on the other hand…
Howl reached through the doorway and snapped his fingers. His other hand made a slight fluttering motion.
"It's all yours, Sophie," he said.
"Howl, you didn't put a spell on me too, did you?" Sophie looked suspicious.
"No," Howl lied. He indicated the door to her.
"I'll get breakfast," said Sophie.
Howl stretched back out on the bed as he watched her go through the door, knowing full well she would come out in an entirely different part of the castle. He needed to keep the secret a while longer. The baubles on the mobile began to move and glow. Something was coming.
xxx
"Markl!" called Sophie. "Markl, where are you?"
She had thought it would be easy enough to follow the crying, despite having to run through corridors she was sure she had never seen before. She wished Howl wouldn't play tricks on her sometimes; the last thing she wanted was for Markl to be upset. But it seemed that Markl's was a phantom voice, quite disconnected from his person. He didn't seem to be anywhere.
Finally, she emerged on the kitchen steps. She could see Heen running round in circles, barking and whimpering.
"Markl!" she called.
The front door slammed. Sophie ran down the stairs, panting. Her eyes went straight to the spinner. It was turned to black.
xxx
"It'll be all right," said Howl, putting his arm round Sophie's shoulder as she sat at the empty breakfast table, staring at Markl's untouched bowl. "I'll go and fetch him back."
"He's so little," said Sophie in a broken voice.
Howl ran his fingers through Sophie's hair and kissed the top of her head. He hated to leave her like this. And he was more scared to go through the portal than he cared to admit. He would have to transform again to soar above the void, and that was something he'd been trying to avoid. He didn't even know where Markl would be, not to mention what state he would be in. And a terrible fear grew on him that if he didn't get there fast enough…
"I'd better go," he said.
"Aren't you even going to eat something?" said Sophie.
Howl shook his head. "I really don't like leaving you on your own, though."
"I've got Heen," said Sophie, pulling him onto her lap. "And Calcifer will be back soon."
"Very well." He kissed her one last time.
"Howl, please be careful," said Sophie.
He didn't want to turn around and see tears in her eyes. He took a deep breath, spread his wings and leapt into the void.
xxx
Markl was falling. He had been falling a long time and he hadn't reached the bottom. Above his head swarmed something that looked like hundreds of paper darts, but as they closed in towards him, they seemed to have talons that were reaching for his eyes. He shut them. Fathoms beneath him, smoke began to rise. A fire was burning.
xxx
Calcifer pulled a couple of logs onto himself and gave a deep, satisfied crackle.
"So, Markl's thrown a tantrum? Well, they do say all students become like their masters."
Sophie reached for the water jug and poised it above Calcifer's head. "I've done it before," she threatened.
"Okay, okay." The fire demon waved his flame-like arms. "Honestly, Sophie, there's no need to worry. Well, maybe there is a little need to worry. In fact, fine, go ahead and worry if it makes you feel better."
"It doesn't make me feel better." Sophie's voice was suspiciously uneven.
"If you're going to cry, could you do it away from the fireplace, please?" said Calcifer.
There was a knock. "Waste door!" Calcifer chimed. Sophie leapt up. It must be the Witch! At least someone in this family was coming instead of going. She pulled open the door.
"Hello, Sophie," said a shy voice.
Sophie blinked. She didn't recognise the fair, slender man at first and, for one impossible moment, she thought it might be Howl. Then she realised.
"Turniphead! I mean – I'm sorry – I don't know what to call you."
"That's all right. Can I come in?"
Sophie glanced into the foggy moorland behind him. It was deserted. "Where's the Witch of the Waste? Isn't she with you?"
"Should she be?" Turnip frowned. "I must say, I'm kind of relieved that she isn't. No offence."
"No," said Sophie absently. "I just thought… Well, come in. We're having a bit of a crisis but you're welcome to some tea."
At least the tea things were in the same place, and Sophie had managed to pick up some fruitcake from the Porthaven market. She reached into the cupboard for the saucers.
"Calcifer, I know we don't usually ask, but will you put the kettle on?"
"Yeah, yeah," said the fire demon. "And I suppose you want me to move the castle twenty miles south while I'm doing it."
"Nobody moves the castle till Howl gets back!" Sophie snapped. "I'm sorry, Cal," she said. "I think I just need a lie down."
She went into her own room and shut the door. The hatboxes and pretty necklaces Howl had given her were still on the dressing table. A pair of Markl's little shorts lay by the window, her needle still sticking out where she had broken off from sewing. He was always tearing his clothes! Sophie's eyes started to mist over. She turned to sit on the bed and a vase of flowers gathered from her special place fell over. Water started dripping onto the floor.
"Sophie?" The prince put his head round the door.
"Not now, Turnip. It's not a good time."
She lay down on the bed, shut her eyes and waited for him to leave. But when the door closed, he was still in the room. He picked up the vase and put the flowers back inside.
"Sophie, are you really happy here in a house full of witches and wizards? It never seemed that much fun to me."
"Of course I'm happy." It would have come out much more convincingly without tears running from her eyes.
The prince sighed and sat down gently on the edge of the bed. "I love you, Sophie."
"I know." Sophie sat up and wiped her eyes. "But Howl likes his fried eggs cooked on both sides, only still a tiny bit runny in the middle." She flinched. Why was she saying such ridiculous things?
"I didn't come back for breakfast," said Turnip. "I came back for you."
"But things have changed, Turnip. Now I'm Howl's cleaning lady and I'm the only person in the house who knows where the soap flakes are kept."
Sophie stamped her foot in annoyance. Howl had put a spell on her after all! He wanted to make sure she didn't tell Markl their secret, only now she couldn't explain it to anyone.
"I see, you think Howl needs you," said Turnip. "But what do you need, Sophie? I would treat you like a princess."
Sophie cupped her hands over her face and held her breath. She was going to have one last go.
"Turnip," she said seriously. "Howl is…exactly five foot eleven inches tall."
"I'll let you rest," said Turnip.
xxx
Howl reached out a claw and slit the first paper dart with a sharp motion as he swooped past. There was a loud rip as every other dart split down the middle and spiralled away out of control. Spies! Suliman had started checking up on him again. He only hoped nothing like this was investigating Sophie. A half-decent spell would cut straight through his subterfuges. He shuddered and then balanced his wings to steady himself. He was going to have to take an enormous plunge now to make up speed. He cleared his mind and channelled all his energy into finding Markl.
Then he dropped.
xxx
Sophie stirred her tea very slowly and took the tiniest sip. On the opposite side of the table, Turnip did likewise. They had both been sitting there for a quarter of an hour, pretending to eat cake, but Heen was definitely getting the best of the meal. She looked towards the door, then towards the staircase, and sighed for what must have been the thirtieth time.
"Well, this is a barrel of laughs, I must admit," said Calcifer. "Come on, Sophie, look on the bright side. There's no one here to make a mess."
Turnip looked up. "Howl has done something to annoy you, hasn't he?"
"Yes," Sophie admitted. "But it's not what you think."
She got up and went to the door, turning the dial to yellow. A field of flowers appeared outside the window. Sophie pulled herself onto the windowsill and rested her hand on her cheek. Outdoors, the grass stretched away endlessly towards the mountains. She wished she could go and lie in it now and forget about everything. Suddenly, she flinched and pulled her hand away from the window frame. A slit on her little finger stung. It looked like a paper cut.
Turniphead came to sit beside Sophie as she sucked her sore finger.
"Is there no chance at all?" he said. "Hearts do change."
Sophie sighed again and rubbed her eyes. "Turnip, do I have to spell it out to you? Howl has already got the most perfect cheekbones west of the mountains. Arghh!"
Her sudden scream made even Calcifer jump (and crackle). It was too infuriating for words. That was just the sort of silly, vain thing Howl would make her say. Suddenly, the fire demon began to laugh.
"Someone's put a silencing spell on you, haven't they? Now I wonder why they would do that. It wouldn't have anything to do with the Wizards' Guild, would it?"
Sophie leapt up. "What about the Wizards' Guild? What do you know, Calcifer?"
"Now you know me, Sophie," Calcifer began.
But at that moment, the spinner turned round to black and the door flew open.
"Howl!" gasped Sophie.
The wizard was standing in the doorway with Markl in his arms. His hair had fallen in front of his face, but what could be seen of him looked very pale. There was a blast of air from the void as a great cloud of feathers blew from his back and into the fireplace, making a horrible, singed smell. Howl sank to his knees and his grip on his unconscious apprentice loosened.
"Turnip, please help me," said Sophie.
She knelt on the floor and gently took Markl from Howl's arms. His face was covered with soot and the front of his hair was singed. She closed her eyes and swallowed hard. Turnip had come to kneel beside her.
"Please." Her voice was almost gone. She knew he cared for Markl, at any rate, but there was no way she could lift Howl up the stairs by herself. "I think we need to get them to Howl's bathroom. Calcifer…?"
"Whatever," said the fire demon. "Put a broom up my logs and I'll sweep the floor as I go." Sophie smiled grimly in spite of everything. Calcifer wouldn't have come back if he didn't truly care. And nor, perhaps, would Turnip.
"All right," said the prince. "You take Markl, I'll take Howl. Just get his arm round my shoulder first."
The water was already hot by the time they got to the bathroom. Sophie turned the taps on and surveyed the chaos. She had given up trying to organise Howl's personal space; the whole place looked as though it had been rampaged by blob men. She sighed.
"Well, let's just start by undressing them."
"Don't you think?" said Turnip awkwardly. "I mean, shouldn't you let me take care of…?"
"Oh, don't worry," said Sophie. "It's nothing I haven't actually been to the seaside before but I think I'd like to try the whelks first."
The prince sat back on his heels. "You and Howl are married, aren't you?"
"Labrador."
He looked away from her and pressed his lips together.
"I'm sorry, Turnip. I did try to tell you." She glanced around the room again. A worrying array of bottles and vials in various states of fullness and emptiness (not to mention tipped over and spilled) covered every surface. "How do I know which one to choose?" she muttered.
Calcifer had released himself from the fireplace and was bobbing outside the door.
"I think someone should be keeping her big mouth shut before she gets herself into trouble. But I also think – and this is just a suggestion, take it or leave it – that if you've got some sort of understanding with Howl that perhaps you have the ability to work this out for yourself."
Sophie nodded. "All right, just give me a few minutes to think." She closed her eyes and let her mind drift back to the special place. Twilight was falling over the fields and the first stars were coming out, spinning like silver cogwheels in the sky and raining down fiery dust. A single, burning spark fell into her palm. She opened her eyes.
"It's this one," she said.
xxx
Howl opened his eyes. The astrolabe was revolving above his head. On the back of the door, the lizard's eye blinked. He was in his own bed. From a chair beside him, a familiar face smiled down.
"Where's Markl?" he said.
"Markl's fine; he's sleeping." Sophie reached out a finger and stroked his cheek. "I unveiled the mysteries of your bathroom at last."
"Did my hair change colour again?"
"No."
"Pity," he said. "I miss being blonde."
Sophie gave the ghost of a laugh and stroked his cheek again.
"What's that?" Howl grabbed her by the wrist. "Show me your finger."
She opened her hand. The fine, bloodless cut on her little finger was so tiny as to be insignificant, except that there was a very faint blue glow escaping from it. Howl gave a deep groan.
"Howl, what's going on?" said Sophie. "Why can't we tell anyone that…?" She pulled herself up short before any more gobbledegook escaped.
He let out another breath and looked into her worried eyes. She had begged him to let her help before and it hadn't turned out too badly in the end. But he just wanted to protect her. He wanted to protect them all.
"Howl?" That was definitely the voice of "Grandma Sophie".
His eyes went to the pledge impaled on his dartboard. "It's another part of the Wizards' Oath," he said. "I'm pledged not to marry until at least ten years after completing my apprenticeship. Technically, I never completed it, so the point is debateable, but…"
"Oh, Howl!" Sophie's voice was brimming with emotion. "I could have waited."
He smirked. "Perhaps you could. Anyway, if Suliman finds out, I'll be forced to pay the fine." He glanced back at her finger. "It looks like she already has."
"Well, what is the fine?" Sophie started going through her pockets as if the amount might be found instantly. "Things have been going fairly well at the flower shop. And custom hasn't been too bad here either. I'm sure the rest of the family would chip in if they knew what was at stake."
Howl shook his head and stilled the metronome before it started driving him crazy. "It's not like that. I'd be forced to surrender my own apprentice."
"Markl!" Sophie was aghast. "And does he know about this?"
"Markl always knows more than you think he does. That's what makes him such a good student."
"Sophie!" Markl's voice was heard calling from the next room.
"Not a word," said Howl, as Sophie got up to leave.
She turned round and put her hands on her hips. "I'm still under your spell, remember?"
He watched her slender figure sway out of the doorway. "And I'm still under yours," he thought.
xxx
"I could offer to surrender one of my powers to Suliman instead," Howl whispered to Sophie as they went downstairs. "But knowing her, she'd take my looks first. Could you still love me if I was old and ugly?"
"You know I would." Sophie squeezed his hand. "But it's not going to come to that." Heaven forbid, she thought! It would be easier to find Howl's heart a second time than to console him over the loss of his gorgeous face.
"Well, what have we here?" said Howl, coming into the kitchen. "It seems no one can keep track over the comings and goings in this house."
Turniphead was still sitting at the table. Perhaps he was just waiting for an update on Markl, perhaps not. He seemed to be finding it difficult to look at Howl. And Sophie couldn't help noticing a slight pattering of rain on the windowpanes all of a sudden. Howl really was useless when it came to concealing his emotions. And if he was jealous of Turnip, that was very amusing.
"Kingsbury door," said Calcifer, suddenly.
Howl and Sophie looked at each other. This could be the moment. Sophie supposed Howl could lock the door by magic and just move the castle, but maybe it was better to simply face up to things. Calcifer gave a loud snap.
"Kingsbury door! Or do you want me to get it myself and burn the castle to the ground?"
"Now, now, Calcifer," said Howl, coming past him. "There's no need to panic." He opened the door.
"Ohhhh!" groaned the Witch of the Waste, heaving her lumbering body up the stairs and throwing herself into the nearest chair. "I'm not sure it was worth exerting myself like that on your behalf, Howl, but you can reward me later." She suddenly noticed the prince and a mischievous smile came to her lips. " Ah. I see you already did."
Turnip coughed nervously. Howl sat down opposite the Witch and fixed her with his glittering eyes.
"What did you do?"
"Oh, just paid a little visit to the palace. I'm sure Madam Suliman will enjoy her new apprentice for as long as he lasts. You can't conceal your secrets from an old witch, my dear." She winked at Sophie. Then she turned back. "You know, Howl, I thought I was all washed up, but it's amazing what revives me."
She tried to touch Turnip's feet with hers under the table. Turnip drew his knees up to his chin.
"Is it?" said Howl dispassionately. "I think that might be classed as a temporary measure. I can't see one of your duplicates lasting for more than a week at the very most. We still need another plan."
"I'll go," said Turnip in a small voice.
"As Suliman's apprentice?" Howl's expression was almost a sneer.
"It's nice of you to offer," said Sophie, "but you're not a wizard. What powers could you use?"
"Diplomacy, threat of war, bad trade relations." He shrugged. "I can be very persuasive. With most people," he added forlornly.
Sophie looked to Howl and back to Turnip. "Are you sure?"
The prince nodded. "I'd do anything for you, Sophie. And Markl, of course," he said hurriedly.
She walked across and hugged him, planting a gentle kiss on his cheek. "You really do have the biggest heart out of all of us. Thank you."
Turnip blushed. "I'd better be going then," he said, bravely ignoring the Witch's disappointed moan. His hand rested on the door handle. "I won't let you down."
xxx
Markl was hungry. And hot. And he felt a little weak in his legs, but not enough to stop him rushing down stairs at full tilt. Something was cooking at last and it smelled like bacon and sausages! Heen jumped up to lick him as he reached the bottom.
"Markl!" said Sophie, hugging him. "You're up!"
He did love Sophie, but he wished she wouldn't cling onto him like that. It wasn't as if she'd lost him forever or anything. At least she was here to make the supper, and Calcifer was here to cook it, so there would be no more need for watery eyes.
He was kind of worried that now would be the moment for the big telling-off, but Master Howl was kissing Sophie again and seemed quite preoccupied. It was disgusting, of course, but it was better than ten hours of red-blue transformations, which was what he had got last time he misbehaved. The Witch of the Waste was back too. She was sitting by the fire sewing his shorts with a very odd, happy look on her face. He really ought to have slept for less time. He'd clearly missed something very entertaining.
Master Howl suspended his embarrassing activity and fetched everyone a glass of wine.
"I think a toast is in order," he said. "Let's drink to our family."
"And to many happy years of…" Sophie paused in whatever she was going to add and gave Howl a significant look. Howl rolled his eyes and gave his wrist a quick flick.
"Go ahead, Sophie," he said. "It's all yours."
END