Anything But Ordinary

Chapter 5-Far Away

If one were to judge Sirius and Kelsey's relationship after the dance, one would assume there would be some sort of progression. Yet, things became even more silent, even more still, and even more complicated. Sirius hadn't uttered one word to her after she cried her eyes into his shoulder all night.

He had promised Dorcas to leave Kelsey alone and he intended to. At least for a little while. The reasoning behind his silence was far bigger than some agreement with her sister.

Every potions class, Kelsey and Sirius would work, only speaking to exchange ingredients. Professor Slughorn would pass by them, his eyes surveying their progress. He never did say anything to them. His glances were neither filled with good or bad judgment. Yet, he seemed to be comprehending the potion, as well as the makers behind it.

Kelsey would always steal glances at Lily Evans and James Potter as she worked on the potion assigned. It seemed to her that James Potter had finally given up on her. He chatted on politely with Amos Diggory, reluctantly, whilst Lily continued to astound the professor with her natural abilities in potion making. Kelsey did notice that something seemed to be wrong with the red head. Perhaps she missed James' inquiries, his witty flirtation, his never-ending persistence. Yet, she never asked.

Still friendless, Kelsey carried on through the hallways alone. Only her thoughts kept her company. Dorcas was usually surrounded by a group of students in her year, but she did try and make time for her sister. Kelsey still hadn't told her what had happened at the dance. Only Amos Diggory and Sirius Black knew. That was how Kelsey intended upon keeping it. She didn't need Dorcas stirring up anymore trouble. She was the older sister. She should be the brave one. Life always had a funny way of keeping things interesting.

"You've been acting extremely out of character, Prongs," Peter told his friend one day as the four boys slipped into their dorms. The air outside was cold and winter was on the verge.

"I know," Sirius sighed. "When was the last time you even asked Miss Lily to go out with you?"

"Can't tell you," James said, rubbing a hand through his messy hair. "I honestly don't remember."

Remus seemed to be smirking in the corner, an all-knowing look on his face. "Playing hard to get, are you, Prongs?" he asked his friend.

"I suppose so," James mumbled irritably. "Nothing else is working. Maybe if I just leave her alone, she'll come to me."

"Women," Sirius groaned, falling back onto his bed gracefully. "Can't live with them. Certainly can't live without them."

"Speaking of," Peter commented. "When was the last time Sirius snuck in after curfew?"

James and Remus looked curiously over at their friend for explanation. Sirius merely shrugged.

"I just haven't been in the mood for flings," he told his friends.

"Why is everything so different this year?" Peter asked his friends. "I mean, Prongs is giving up on Evans and now Sirius is giving up on flings. Moony, please tell me you don't intend on giving up on the Shrieking Shack."

"Trust me, Peter," Remus said, grinning casually. "If I were to do that, we'd all have bigger problems than women."

"Anyone want to go to the kitchens?" Peter asked after a few moments of silence. "I'm getting hungry."

"Bottomless pit," Sirius barked out, laughing at his own humor.

Remus stood and walked over to Peter. "I'll go with you, Wormtail. We'll leave these two to feel sorry for themselves."

Sirius threw a show at their heads as they walked out. Lately, nothing had felt right. Pranking, snogging, trouble. It'd all felt pointless.

He looked over at his friend, whose hazel eyes were staring blankly up at the ceiling, as if immersed in deep thought.

"Prongs, what's this thing about Evans really about?" Sirius asked. "You mad at her?"

James rolled over onto his stomach and groaned into his pillow. "Why does everyone keep asking me that?"

"You haven't given up on her, have you?" Sirius asked, almost worried about his friend. "I mean, what would the year be without your endless pursuits?"

"Less annoying?" James tried. He saw that Sirius wasn't going to give up and he lifted his head from the pillow and decided to speak. "I'm just sick of this. I mean, I ask her out, she rejects me, she's the one who holds the power. I honestly want to know how she'd feel without my constant badgering. It's the only way to know whether I've wasted my time all these years."

"I wish there was something I could tell you," Sirius replied. "But sadly, you've gone farther with Evans than I ever have with a girl."

James looked over curiously at his best friend. "What do you mean?"

"You've shown her you care," he told his friend. "I've never let a girl see that side of me. It's vulnerable, personal, and well, private. I don't think I've allowed myself to open up to someone like you have. In a way, Evans and I are the same person. She doesn't want to open up to you because she's scared; not because she doesn't like you."

James nodded his head in understanding. He had never heard Sirius speak so maturely about anything before. "Something bothering you, Padfoot?" he asked in confusion.

"You could say that," Sirius replied. "I've just been really confused lately."

"Aren't we all?" James asked, directing it as more of a statement than a question. And it was true; they were all confused in one way or another.

Even though Kelsey knew that the Astronomy Tower had been her and Sirius' spot to sit and chat, she never stopped going there. Even though the two of them couldn't be considered friends anymore, that spot was monumental to her. It served as a constant reminder as to who she wanted to be. She wanted to be social, she wanted to be brave, and she wanted to be free. The stars were inspiring to her and she refused to give up that one small pleasure.

The breeze from the open window hit her legs fiercely, sending goose bumps to cascade upon them. She had stepped out of the dorm in her nightgown, forgetting shoes or a dressing robe. She had felt impulsive and the Astronomy Tower was empty at such times anyways.

She sat there for hours, merely thinking and enjoying the view. It was spectacular. She could see every inch of the Hogwarts grounds from where she was sitting, the lake rippling gently in the moonlight.

She didn't even bother turning her head when she heard footsteps. If it was a Prefect or teacher, she'd surely receive detention. The beauty engrossed her and she refused to look away. Only when she heard that voice, his voice, did she bother even blinking.

"Kelsey," he said in a near whisper. It was full of guilt and need. Sirius Black had come to find her and yet, something felt different. It wasn't a shock or surprise. It felt planned and right. It was as if she'd be subconsciously waiting for him.

He walked towards her, although not daring to sit down in his former spot. He knew why he'd come to find her and he knew what he wanted to say, but the trouble was, it was completely new to him.

She turned to look at him, her brown eyes big and full of fear. No matter how much she tried, she could never be brave. It wasn't in her nature. She was constantly scared. As scared as she was of what he'd say to her, she was comfortable and at ease.

"These past few weeks," he started, still unsure of how to say it. "I've been fighting this. I've been fighting our friendship. I've been fighting our trust. And well, I've been fighting you."

She nodded, unsure of how to respond to that.

"It's not because I don't like you," he assured her. "Trust me, it's not. It's just that, after the dance, I got scared. I mean, I'd never been more protective of someone in my life. At that moment, Amos Diggory was trying to hurt you and I couldn't have that. I was jealous and angry and I didn't act the way I should have. I acted as a boyfriend, opposed to a friend. I don't get jealous. I don't get protective. It just doesn't happen. Do you know what I mean?"

She could understand. His behavior had indeed surprised her, but he was exactly who she had needed that night.

"Yes," she replied quietly. "I know what you mean."

"Well, this got me thinking. Why was I acting like that? What did it all mean? And I've never been more confused in my life. I'm not supposed to care about you like I do. I'm Sirius Black. I don't allow myself to get hurt. I don't allow myself to get attached. Yet, that night, I threw it all away. And since then, I've been fighting everything I've been feeling," he told her, his voice shaky and different. He wasn't being suave, smooth, or charming. He was being real. She had never seen this side of him before and she preferred it. He was being honest, something she hadn't thought possible.

"And what is it you've been feeling?" she asked him unsurely.

"I've been feeling that I don't ever want to see you cry again," he told her quietly.

His answer surprised her. She had been expecting something along the lines of 'Kelsey, I don't want to be your Potions partner anymore'. Certainly not something that profound.

And as he approached her, she knew things were going to be different between them. She couldn't deny it any longer either.

As she received her first kiss, she knew things were as they should be.

A/N: Hm, sorry for the wait. It's been hectic. Hope you enjoyed it. I know things are going a bit fast, but drama is in store. Please review.