Anything But Ordinary

Chapter 9-Over

The following week, Kelsey clung constantly to Sirius. He was all she truly had anymore. She had desperately wanted to be popular, to have meaning in her remaining year at Hogwarts. She wanted to be someone, someone who was either respected or looked up to. She wanted that superior title. But now, she knew she could never have it.

Mary hadn't spoken a word to Kelsey the following morning. She hadn't muttered an apology of any sorts, nor had she offered any sort of explanation. She had merely walked past, as if seeing nothing at all.

When Kelsey voiced her hopes and dreams to Sirius, he looked at her as if seeing her for the first time. A glint in his eyes told her that something had changed, something had gone wrong somehow. Something was unsettled and there was something he was holding back. Kelsey just wished for him to spit it out, release it, so the two of them could work past it.

Apart from her aspirations, he was her everything. He was all she thought about, all she cared about, and her one single devotion. He was her one value, the beat in her heart. She grew lovesick and restless at night, desperately missing his arms around her. Despite his reclusive manner as of late, Kelsey managed to remain as hopeful as ever before. She was becoming more and more optimistic, opening up to several people in the common room. She was becoming sociable, despite Mary's best efforts against her.

She still hadn't managed to acquire any friends, but Lily Evans made a point of offering a hello any chance she could. Lily and James were still being secretive about their relationship, which bemused Kelsey. She was dying to just scream her feelings to the world. She was under the impression that love was something to be proud of, something to embrace.

She never expected love to bring so much trouble, so much turmoil, and so much grief. Never.

XXX

During one particularly lonely afternoon, Kelsey strolled down a hall quietly, hoping to run into Sirius. He had told her to meet him in the Astronomy Tower sometime during that hour. He had left late last night with the other Marauders and hadn't returned. Kelsey had sat in that tower gazing at the gleaming full moon for hours. Sleep wasn't particularly enjoyable anymore. She must preferred to stargaze.

So as she wasted time walking down the hall, she wondered what the Marauders did when they were alone. She could only imagine what fun, witty banter between them, the ruthless exchange of future prank ideas, and their derisive talk of girls at the school.

She longed for the kind of friendship they held. They were so loyal to one another, so aware of what the others were thinking.

"Well, if it isn't Meadowes," a voice sneered from across the hall. Kelsey's head snapped back to reality and away from the realm of daydreams. She couldn't help but roll her soft, brown eyes as she spotted Mary, followed by what seemed the entire school.

What is this?, she wondered nervously, feeling hundreds of eyes upon her, surveying her, judging her.

"Mary," Kelsey said icily, spotting the crowd for Dorcas. Surprisingly, her sister wasn't with her gang of cronies. "What can I do for you?"

Mary threw her blonde head back, letting out a chillingly sharp laugh. "Absolutely nothing, dear girl. What could I have to ask of someone like you?"

Great, I go out to take a walk and I get ambushed by Mary and the entire seventh year. Just great, Kelsey thought bitterly.

"I don't know," Kelsey told her. "Why don't you tell me, considering, well, you're clearly jealous."

"Jealous?" Mary barked out, allowing others near her to laugh a bit as well. "What on Earth would I be jealous of, Meadowes?"

"Hm, well, let me think about this," Kelsey said sarcastically, resting her hands on her chin thoughtfully. "Couldn't be the fact that Sirius left you for me, could it?"

"Left me?" the girl retorted, attempting to keep her tone confidant and domineering. "Sirius Black leave me? You've obviously been misinformed. I was the one to leave him."

"And yes, he's definitely heartbroken about that," Kelsey told the girl. She smirked and elaborated, "Mary, he left you and now you're taking out your jealousy on me. I may not be popular, but that doesn't mean I'm stupid. I can put two and two together and well, you're definitely the one acting like the injured party in this situation."

Blushing red furiously, Mary lunged toward Kelsey quickly, reaching to grab the soft, curled locks on her head. Kelsey reached back, grabbing onto Mary's straight blonde hair and tugging hard. The crowd egged the two girls on, blocking the Professors from sight of the brawl.

Kelsey felt Mary smack her lip roughly, allowing small drops of blood to flow freely from the fresh wound. Savagely, all the hurt and vulnerability Kelsey had been feeling was ready to be released. She raised her arm back, forming a fist and hitting the girl squarely in the jaw.

As Mary stumbled back with the final blow, Kelsey caught someone's eyes. She saw Sirius, his head hung low and his eyes narrowed in shame. There was no denying the change in his glance. He was indeed seeing her differently.

XXX

As Kelsey quietly crept into the Astronomy Tower that night, she found Sirius lazing on the window sill, his face deep in thought. She hadn't been able to reach through the crowd after the fight to catch up with him. She hadn't been able to explain.

"Why've you been avoiding me?"

The question struck the atmosphere, breaking the silence that had once been so thick and resistant. She had muttered those five words, hoping for a decent explanation, an answer to her newfound confusion.

He didn't reply. He couldn't reply. He was contemplating, fighting an ongoing internal battle. She wanted to reach out to him, to grab his hand, to coarse her hands through his hair. Yet, she remained in the doorway. She felt some inclination to do so, her instinct advising her.

"What's wrong with you, Sirius? Why are you acting so different?" she demanded, her voice trembling in fear. Something was screaming inside of her, something strong and forceful.

"I'm acting different?" he retorted quickly, far too quickly. "How can you possibly ask that, Kels? How can you ask that when you've become a completely different person?"

His words hit her hard, stinging her insides gruesomely. She hadn't changed that much. She'd though she'd grown more assertive, more strong, more sociable. She was becoming all that she had wanted. Why couldn't he understand that?

"You're morphing into something superficial. Something that you're not. You're becoming like every other blasted girl in this school. You're not real anymore, Kelsey," he told her brokenly. "You're just not real. You've lost your ambition, your drive, your spunk. You've lost it all. And you know what? I blame myself. I've done it to you."

"You? Isn't that a bit egotistical?" she quipped angrily.

"Look in the mirror, Kelsey! Look at your bruised face! How many fights had you gotten in before you knew me? None, I'm presuming. Mary wouldn't be your problem if it wasn't for me. She wouldn't have even targeted you at all. You'd have been off of her radar. You'd be the same Kelsey Meadowes I once longed for," he told her. "But now, I don't even know you."

"You don't mean that," she told him, messy tears falling unevenly from her eyes. "How can you say that after all we've been through?"

"Because, Kels, I don't like who you're becoming," he told her.

"What? Assertive, proud, and confidant? I can take care of myself now and that somehow makes me less desirable?" she asked him harshly. "Are you mad that I'm no longer your damsel in distress?"

"You don't even realize it," he told her, walking towards the door and heading down the stairs. "You're still the damn damsel."

A/N: Please review.