What's in a Name?

Chapter 4

Secrets

D'Artagnan walked out of Duval's office not knowing whether he was better off having been told this news or not. It really wasn't what he had wanted to hear. He had enough on his mind right now, not to mention the fact that he was starting to feel the effects of not getting enough sleep. But at least this was giving him advanced notice; he'd worry about it when the time came. Now his main concern was to post his letter.

Jacqueline had decided she would go to the stables. Perhaps staying busy would keep her mind occupied. She'd had enough thinking for one day, and it wasn't even noon yet. She picked up the curry-comb and started to groom her horse; it was long past due. She had neglected a lot of things this week; her mind refusing to forget that night a week ago.

When she looked up she saw D'Artagnan walking past the stable doors toward the main part of town. Should she go find out what Duval had wanted him for? After all, most duties he assigned he would have them work together on. Though, if it had been important, wouldn't D'Artagnan have come to tell her? Perhaps this was something Duval was giving only to him. But then, how would she know for sure unless she went to find out? She put the comb down, locked the gate of her horse's pen, and headed out the door to find him.

She was sure he was heading to the mercantile to post his letter; he had said he wanted it to go out today. Jacqueline still couldn't shake the feeling of envy for her best friend having grown up around the original Musketeers. It had to have been much more exciting then her humble childhood on the farm; and yet he acted as though it were nothing.

When she rounded the corner she could see D'Artagnan just up the street. He was nearly to the mercantile. Another minute and she'd know what the meeting was about. What she saw next, though, made her stop where she was. Not now, thought Jacqueline.

As D'Artagnan neared the door of the store, out of that very door walked Charlotte. Of course, when Charlotte spotted him, she smiled and quickly walked over to him. Jacqueline stood there watching the pair talking back and forth. Somehow she couldn't bring herself to interrupt them; she just stood there watching the interlude. She thought to herself that she was probably the only woman in Paris that he hadn't shared his secret with. She was sure she was the only woman in Paris that hadn't given herself up to him.

After a couple of minutes that, to Jacqueline, had felt like hours, D'Artagnan took his leave and walked into the mercantile. Now would be her chance to ask Charlotte. She was quite certain that if Charlotte knew, she wouldn't keep it quiet.

Jacqueline once again started down the street. Charlotte, as though on cue, noticed her and hurried her way, wearing a big smile.

"Hello Jacques," Charlotte started.

"Well, hello Charlotte. I had noticed you talking with D'Artagnan a moment ago and I was wondering….."

"Oh, D'Artagnan?" Charlotte interrupted, speaking in her usual, quick way. "Yes, I was. Isn't he the most adorable man you've ever met?"

"Well, I…."

"Oh, I know you wouldn't notice, being a man yourself and all. But I think……."

Oh no, does this woman never stop talking? "Yes, I know, but I was wondering if….."

"I just was asking him if he would possibly do this little thing….."

Heavens! If she would just let me get a word in, I could find out if she knows anything.

"…..and he said he would think about it and……"

How on earth does he stand talking with her? Jacqueline wondered. Could he actually like to listen to chatter like this? He must; it seemed like most women in town talked this way. But perhaps it wasn't the conversation that they enjoyed together.

If I have to listen to a few more minutes of this, I may have to gag her, she thought.

"……I thought if you could do this one teeny, tiny favor for me……" continued Charlotte.

"Well, I……."

"Oh, I just knew you would! Thank you so much, Jacques!"

And with that, Charlotte rushed on down the street, leaving Jacqueline to wonder what she had just supposedly agreed to do. Her head spinning, she also realized that she was no closer to finding out the answer.

She decided that what she thought had been a simple question was turning into quite a complicated one. Why couldn't he have just told her in the first place, instead of being his usual stubborn, smug self? He was so irritating at times! She wondered why he never seemed to be that way with anyone else.

"Hey Jacques!" came D'Artagnan's voice from behind her, making her jump.

"Geesh! Don't do that!" She turned to see him laughing at her. "Sometimes I'd just like to punch you!" Oh no, had she just said that out loud?

Still laughing, he said, "Be my guest…..if you think you're man enough. But then again, it could be fun….."

Jacqueline made a face at him. Always with the insinuations!

"What were you and Charlotte talking about just now?" he continued.

"I could ask you the same thing."

"But I asked you first. So?"

"Actually, I'm not sure; I wasn't really listening to her. She was just chattering something about favors or something," she said, still wondering what favor Charlotte thought she had agreed to.

"I honestly wasn't listening either." I was thinking of you…….in a light blue dress…….with your dark hair falling down…..Maybe you should punch me, he thought.

Jacqueline laughed. "So, what did Duval want?"

D'Artagnan looked down, thinking. No way was he going to tell her the real reason for the meeting. "Nothing, really. Just to talk."

"Just to talk," she repeated.

"Yes."

"Oh." So he didn't want to tell her. Well, he could keep his secrets! Then, the more she thought about it, the more she started feeling guilty; he should have his secrets that she's not privy to. After all, he had been right; she still had a few secrets that he knew nothing about.

"What do you have planned for today?" she asked, as they started walking back toward the garrison.

"Well, I have patrol with Siroc in a couple of hours, so I'm not sure what to do until then," he said, wishing that Jacqueline could walk freely as herself through town. He yearned to reach out for her hand. But then, he thought, she probably wouldn't let me take it anyways. "What about you?"

"I thought maybe I'd go riding. Paris is nice, but sometimes I miss the wide open spaces of the country."

"You miss your family, don't you?" he asked, already knowing the answer. He wished he had the power to bring them back for her.

She smiled in a sad way. "Yes, very much." If they were still alive, she'd have someone to talk to about her feelings, even if their answers would be from a man's point of view. But she knew that she needed time alone, to think. At times it was hard for her to talk to D'Artagnan without wanting more. But she was not going to be just another one of his many flings. When she decided to let herself love a man, she wanted that love returned by someone that would be true to her; someone who wanted to share his life as she would share hers. D'Artagnan was just too fickle.

"Jacqueline," D'Artagnan said in a low voice so only she would hear. "We should start thinking of a way to get your name cleared." She stopped and looked at him. He stopped too, returning her gaze. "You shouldn't have to spend the rest of your life hiding. You don't deserve that."

Tears started welling up in her eyes. "You'd help me clear my name?" she asked quietly. Every time she had given up on him, he'd say something so caring. It wasn't fair.

"That's what friends do," he answered, noticing the tears about to spill out of her eyes, the only eyes he wanted to spend the rest of his life looking into. He found that at that moment he would be willing to give up his dream of being a Musketeer, as well as his country, if he could just reach up and wipe them away. He had to find a way to prove himself to her; a way that would cause her to love him as he already loved her.