Notes and Warnings: No I do NOT own the characters. They belong to Sanami Matoh. However like every fanfic author I'm borrowing them. And yes, this IS yaoi, so don't read if you don't like 2 men having sex! Thank you!

(Special thanks to my ex for inspiring this mess)

Fake – Miranda Rights by Ryochan

"Dee, you home?" Ryo flicked on the light's to his partner's apartment, glad at this time to have a spare key, considering he was carrying two bags of considerably heavy groceries at the moment.

The lights flashed on with a small click, and indication that the wiring system of Dee's apartment probably needing some double-checking, and looked around as he laid his two bags of groceries on the small kitchen area's table, and after he had closed and locked Dee's front door.

As always, the place was a mess, and Ryo frowned.

He knew Dee could clean. Heck, he had cleaned up Ryo's place pretty nicely when he had been sick right after JJ had arrived at the station, and pretty nicely was an understatement. Even for Ryo's normally up-tight, neatly decorated home (he imagined the gay jokes from Dee right here), Dee had the place looking better than Ryo ever did.

But this... Well, Dee's apartment right now looked like a hurricane had moved through, along with perhaps and earth-quake and who knows what else.

'Usually Dee cleans after his parties, though, once he gets off duty.' Ryo grabbed up some of the plates and cups sitting on the table and slid them into the sink. 'And he's been off the last three days, having taken that vacation... Which he whined I should join him.'

Shaking his head, Ryo dismissed that thought and returned to the table, where he picked up several empty cans of beer and other harsh-smelling alcohol, such as vodka. He deposited these in the trash can, before remembering that the groceries had a few refrigerator items.

Walking back to the two bags he had carried in, he pulled out a gallon of milk and some luncheon meat and went to slide those into Dee's fridge. Unfortuantely for him, Dee hadn't seemed to bother to clear the fridge out in a while and there was hardly any room when he looked inside, as well as a rancid odor.

"Ugh, Dee this is disgusting..." Ryo sighed as he reached for a gallon of solidfying milk.

"Well sorry..." A voice rang out from the other side of the apartment, and Ryo looked over, past the large window seat which decorated Dee's front room, to the door that lead to his bedroom, and to a very weary looking Dee Laytner, dressed in his usual amount of little clothing. "Haven't been feeling much like cleaning lately."

Ryo sighed, and finished pulling the curdled milk out of the fridge. He stood and dumped it in the trash can before pulling the entire trash can to the fridge, where he began to deposit spoiled food into it. "That may be so, but you should at least clean the fridge out before everything grows legs and moves."

"Hey, I thought you were supposed to be the realist..." Dee moved to lean on the counter beside the fridge, trying to keep his eyes off of the cute little ass that was sticking out while Ryo cleared out the decayed stuff. "How could anything grow legs and move?"

"It's a figure of speech, dummy." Ryo groaned as he deposited...something...into the trash can. Something because, whatever it was, it didn't look like it anymore. "And quit staring at my ass, I know you are."

Dee coughed faintly, and turned his head away. Dammit, he was caught again. Ryo was getting good at reading Dee's looks, even if he wasn't actually looking at Dee. "Well, anyway... I just haven't been feeling too well lately, so..."

Ryo paused in his clearing of the science experiment and looked at Dee. "Not feeling well? Do you have a fever?"

Dee shook his head, and then blinked as Ryo's slightly chilled hand touched his forehead. "I've just had some headaches and sniffles is all."

"You're running a low-grade, Dee." Ryo pulled his hand away and Dee was almost dissapointed. The cool hand felt really nice, and if he was running a low-grade, he now knew why. "Go lay down, I'll finish putting away the groceries then get you some medicine."

"I'm really okay, Ryo." Dee smiled warmly. "It's just a headache and sniffles, and..."

"And a low-grade fever." Ryo pulled Dee away from the counter, then moved behind him and marched him to his room. "You need to rest. Now go lay down. I'll bring you some tea and some medicine in a few minutes."

Sighing, Dee obeyed, trotting back to the bed which seemed well-used. "Okay, but can I have some sugar with that?" A grin spread across the animalistic-cop's face.

Feeling a blush creep up, Ryo moved his hand to his face. "Dee! Lay down and go to sleep!"

With that, the half-Japanese man turned and went back towards the kitchen.

Dee chuckled a little. It was so easy to get under Ryo's collar sometimes... Now if it were so easy to get him under the covers...

Finished cleaning, Ryo pulled the pot of hot water off the oven where he had let it cool for a few minutes.

Carefully, he poured the steaming liquid into a glass which already had a tea bag in it. He watched as the water climbed towards the top of the cup and stopped the flow of water before it over-flowed.

Placing the pot back onto the stove, Ryo played with the tea bag, trying to get the water to turn that pleasant shade of brown that meant the tea was ready to drink and pondered the man lying in the room nearby.

Even sick, Dee could be so obnoxious. So horny. And he wondered where he got all that energy from.

Drawing the tea bag from the cup, Ryo threw it into the now full trash can and grabbed up the cup and a small bottle of medicine which he had laid on the table earlier.

Moving to the bedroom, he stared inside. Dee, who had been asleep when he peeked in earlier, was leaning on his elbows on his stomach and looking at...

"Dee, that's disgusting." Ryo frowned darkly as he crossed the room to his black-haired partner, who looked at him, a little confused. When Ryo indicated the magazine Dee had, the horn-dog of an American looked up at Ryo.

"Oh, come on, Ryo," Dee's grin increased. "I've seen the magazines you have. No wait, those are Bikky's. But I've seen the romance novels."

Ryo blushed darkly and glared at Dee. "Those were my Mother's and you know it!"

"Yeah, but I bet you you read them." Dee chuckled as Ryo glared darkly at him. "Wha-at? Every guy has a dirty mind sometimes, and I mean, damn, look at those tits, they're huge!" Dee held the magazine right up into Ryo's face.

At first, Ryo had debated just shoving the magazine away, but Dee's insinuation that every man had a dirty mind bothered him. It wasn't like he didn't have his fair share of dirty thoughts, but unlike certain partners, he could keep them under control.

With barely restrained anger, Ryo grabbed the magazine right out of Dee's hands, never noticing whatever image Dee was looking at and laid down the cup of steaming tea next to Dee on the night stand, along with the medicine. "Take your medicine, dick wad."

"Man, how grumpy." Dee sat up and opened the pill bottle, pouring out a couple of pills, before re-capping it. "Seriously, Ryo, if it bothers you that much that I have those magazines, I'll throw them away." Popping the pills into his mouth, Dee took a little of the tea into his mouth and swallowed them. "But I don't think that's what makes you mad, now is it?"

"What does that mean?" Ryo grabbed the medicine bottle and glared at Dee.

"I mean, you're a guy, Ryo, even if you do sometimes act like a chick." Dee held up defensive hands at the look Ryo directed him on that one. "What? It's not a bad thing, but, I mean, well... Jeez..." Dee rubbed at his head a little. "Listen, what I mean is, you know me, Ryo. I'm hornier than a dog in heat and I really like sex."

"And with sex comes hormones, and with hormones comes issues of needing to deal with them. And well," Dee looked at Ryo with some strange look, somewhere between... smirking and... and what? Ryo couldn't place the other look. "Well, you know, with a cold-fish of a lover, sometimes a man's gotta find other ways to get off, you know? Without destroying trust by taking on another lover."

"Cold... Fish...?" Ryo's black eyes just seemed to get impractically darker as he folded his arms across his chest. "Who is a cold fish, Dee Laytner?"

Dee grinned. Well, he had expected Ryo to get mad over that comment, but he had expected to be slapped, instead of getting dark, angry, eyes turned on him.

'Dug my own grave, I did.' Dee sighed and looked at Ryo. "You, Ryo. I'm always the one who starts things, you know? Never you. You just hide behind that pretty-boy facade of yours, and that naivate, and although I like it, sometimes I'd like to see what I saw with Leo come out, that cold side and see where it would take us in the bedroom."

"Really now?" His eyes seemed to be growing darker again, and Dee swallowed hard. A cool hand came to cup his face. "You want to see what my dark-side does in the bedroom?"

"Ah..." Dee wasn't sure if he would regret this, but he nodded. "Yes. Yes, I do..."

Ryo smirked softly, lips curling in a way which almost frightened, yet sort of excited, Dee. "I'm not reducing myself to your level, Dee."

"Eh?" Dee blinked, taken aback and pulled his head a little away from Ryo's hands, staring at the half-asian man above him, whose eyes, in just a few seconds seemed to have returned to normal. A small pout crossed his lips. "Jeez, you're mean. Throw me a bone or something, I'm not feeling well."

Undoing his tie, Ryo turned away from Dee and smiled. "You already have a bone, Dee. And I'm sure your hand can handle it for a night."

"That's cruel!" Dee frowned and crossed his arms. "How can you say something like that, Ryo? To a sick man? A man with one wish?"

Ryo smirked softly. There Dee went, playing it up again. Well, he could play games of his own.

Turning from where he had placed his tie onto a chair, as well as the medicine bottle he had almost forgotton about, Ryo smiled at Dee. "Oh, come, Dee... Your hand can handle it. Besides, it might be fun to watch."

"Eh?" Dee blinked softly, looking at his chestnut-haired partner, before the full impact of the words kicked in. "Eh! Did I just hear that right, Ryo?"

Dark eyes back to that darkness they were before Ryo decided not to play Dee's 'game', the Japanese-American smiled at his black-haired partner. "Yes, I think you did. I'd like to see you play with yourself."

"Are...Are you serious, Ryo?" Dee could feel the lump in his throat, as well as the lump in his sweatpants.

If Ryo was serious, well, he supposed he wouldn't mind supplying his partner with a show but... When had Ryo ever asked something like this? It seemed far too bizarre, even for a joke. Dee started to wonder how high his temperature was.

Then, Ryo's laughter broke out. "Oh come on, Dee, would I ever say anything like that seriously!" Continuing to laugh, Ryo saw the pout cross Dee's face. "Oh come on," He started to cross to his partner. "You should have seen your face, it was hysterical. Besides, Dee..." He leaned down near his ear. "Wasn't that makin' you hot?"

Dee jerked back. He was definently hot now, hot and bright-red in the face, and looking at his partner, whose eyes were that extremely dark hue of black.

"What's wrong, Dee?" Ryo leaned closer, watching Dee scoot away. "Are you taken aback when not in control, or are you just hornier than a horn dog?"

"Ah..." Dee grinned, as best he could. "I won't answer that on the premise that it may incriminate me in a court of law?"

"Well, I suppose you do have the right to remain silent." Ryo grinned almost evily, causing Dee to move further back. "But anything you say or do, can and will be used against you in a court of law."

Grabbing on of Dee's hands, Ryo pinned it to the bed as the other reached inside Dee's dresser.

Hearing a clinking sound, Dee's eyes widened, and before he could make much movement he felt the cold feel of metal as handcuffs encircled his wrist, tightening only a little.

"Ah, Ryo...?" Dee trembled faintly, and felt himself flipped to his stomach. "What are you doing?"

"Reading you your rights." The other cuff was set firmly to Dee's other wrist, the cool metal causing him to tremble as much as the fact Ryo was right over him, straddling him from above. "You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be appointed for you free of charge."

Rolling Dee again, Ryo grinned at him. "If you decide not to have an attorney present during questioning, you may request one at any time. Do you understand your rights as I have read them to you?"

Dee looked up at the dark eyes of his partner, or his lover if you preferred the term, staring down at him, darkly, evily, seductively and... Well, hornily, if that was even a word, and because of that he couldn't do much but utter out a croaked. "Yes..." And as Ryo moved his mouth down to kiss Dee softly, the dark-haired man realized he had brought this on himself by calling Ryo a cold fish in the first place.

Within a few moments of the kiss, Ryo had Dee off the bed and flat against a wall, hands cuffed behind him and legs spread far apart, the perfect posistion for a good frisking.

"Do you have any hidden weapons I should be made aware of, my horny little criminal?" Ryo's voice came right at Dee's ear, making the slightly taller man tremble.

He hated being called a criminal, memories of his past usually being revisted with that word, but by Ryo's adding those three little words before it, Dee just felt his sweat pants grow smaller as other body parts grew bigger.

"I... May be packing heat..." He responded, deciding to see where this would lead.

"I see." Came the cold response from his half-asian lover. "So I suppose I'll have to search you then." His hands went up, grabbing at Dee's neck from behind with gentle fingers, and sliding them down to his collar bone, before moving them further down. "I don't suppose you have anything on your chest, it being bear and all."

A quick move over his abdomen, and then Ryo's hands were on Dee's thighs. They stroked, and patted a little in an imitation of a frisk, before running behind to cup Dee's ass right through his sweat pants, causing the emerald-eyed man to gasp faintly, using the wall in front of him as a support.

Ryo took a few extra minutes to massage Dee's rear, before running his hands down Dee's outer thighs, past his knees and all the way to his ankles. He then repeated the movement, but this time on Dee's inside, smirking as the man in his grasp trembled as he reached higher and higher.

Suddenly stopping, Ryo flipped Dee around, placing his back to the wall and watching Dee look at him through eyes that were excited, dazed and curious what his usually-uke partner was going to do next.

Ryo smiled and kneeled, starting the whole running of his hands thing again, starting from Dee's ankles, up his outer thighs again and to his hips, which he squeezed a little, before moving his hands over, starting to move downwards, but stopping.

With a small grin, Ryo kneeled again and moved his hands up Dee's inner thighs.

Dee groaned internally. Dammit, he should have just thrown Ryo down and had his usual way with him. Ryo was being such a goddamned tease, and it was driving Dee wild.

Well, actually, that wasn't the only reason. Ryo's being in charge like this, having cuffed Dee, even though he could easily get out of it, put him against the wall and taken on this entire police roll to that of what he had termed for Dee as a criminal, well, it was kind of causing him problems too.

And then he felt a hand cup him around his little issue, and watched Ryo's eyes widen, before a smirk crossed his face. "And what is this? An illegal weapon?"

"Perhaps..." Dee smiled at Ryo, barely cutting off a want to scream 'quit teasing, just fucking do it' to his smaller partner, and just waited to see what Randy would do.

"Suppose I'll have to make sure. Can't have you carrying anything lethal into the prison." Kneeling for the fifth time that night, Ryo drew down Dee's sweatpants, and then reached up to pull down his boxers.

Reconsidering, however, he instead moved the piece of clothing just far enough down to reveal what he wanted to see, Dee's fairly-well erect penis. "Well, this doesn't look like a concealed weapon."

"Some states may argue otherwise." Dee snorted. He was starting to feel a little haughty, and hell, if Ryo was going to play, he was going to play back and see what his mad partner would do... except for, wasn't it Dee who was mad? Well, he could worry about that later.

A smirk crossed Ryo's face. "Well, I suppose it does look loaded." He grasped Dee's member gently, squeezing and watched Dee gasp and arch into his hand. "I'll have to make sure that it's nothing harmful, however."

"And how will you do that...?" Dee barely finished his sentence as an almost feral grin was graced in his direction, before a warm tongue flicked across his tip gently. "Shit!" He let the curse word out as he felt the second flick, and then felt Ryo dive right into using his mouth on him.

A groan from the back of his throat told Ryo that Dee was enjoying himself, but the slight question in that groan almost made Ryo laugh, almost. He was too busy concentrating on his action and he already knew what the question was. Why did Ryo just take Dee in, when he was almost always timid about this action?

Well, quite simply, because Dee wanted to see the dark side of him, and that included giving Dee a blow-job he'd never forget.

So Ryo continued working over Dee's wanting member, moving his head slowly and adjusting his throat to the length and thickness of it.

He listened to the deep breathing and occasional groan of the man above him as he continued his assault, and held to his hips as Dee tried to thrust himself foward in time with Ryo's motions. This elicited another groan from the black-haired man, who wasn't sure what to think of this.

Sure, it was wonderful to have a seme-Ryo, but damn, he wanted to move right now and yet he couldn't.

Ryo may look weak, but he could be really quite strong when he wanted to be, and right now seemed to be one of those times he wanted to be.

Dee just continued to try to move his hips, jerking faintly at the not-very-tight cuffs which had been secured around his wrists, and trying to get Ryo to take him deeper.

He gasped, however, when a bite, not too hard, but not totally soft either, was placed onto the middle of his penis, a sort of warning to quit his movements, perhaps? Taking it as such, Dee stilled himself as much as he could, trying not to buck foward as Ryo engulfed him deeper into his throat.

'Holy shit!' Dee spat in his mind as he felt the movement that brought him deeper. He knew Ryo was a quick learner, but he didn't figure that he would have figured out how to deep-throat someone already. It just didn't seem like the normally shy man.

Then again, neither was molesting Dee without much pretense and deciding to play good cop/bad cop, molesting the criminal. Heck, neither was the earlier suggestion of Dee giving himself a hand-job while Ryo watched.

Again, Dee let out a slew of curse words, this time aloud as Ryo relaxed his throat to its fullest and took Dee all the way in.

For a moment, the chestnut-haired man sat there, getting himself used to the feel perhaps, before starting a quick movement of pulling Dee mostly out, breathing, and then bringing Dee's tortured member deep into the recesses of his throat.

"Oh...!" Was all Dee could say, desperately trying to keep himself held up against the wall, desperately trying not to climax then and there. He squinted his eyes and looked down, watching Ryo's head bob in his motions, and bit his lip.

Damn, if this was Ryo's dark side, he'd have to call him cold fish more often. The role-reversal was total hell, and yet also total bliss.

A sharp gasp, and Dee felt himself release. Somewhere in his thoughts, he had reached a state where he couldn't hold back, and he tried to arch himself up, being held by Ryo's strong hands against the wall as the smaller man drank him in.

Pulling back, Ryo licked at Dee a little before looking up. "Well, it doesn't seem to be anything dangerous... but it isn't loaded anymore."

"I wonder why!" Dee shouted as he collapsed. "Jesus, Ryo! Where the fuck did you learn to deep-throat like that!"

Ryo blushed and chuckled faintly. "That's, er, my secret?"

"Oh, no friggin' way!" Dee glared at Ryo, whose eyes had returned to their normal black shade. He squirmed his hands from his cuffs and grabbed the chestnut-blonde by the shoulders. "You've never done it with a guy before me, so where the hell did you learn that! Or is there something I should know!"

Ryo laughed softly, patting Dee's hands with his own. "Oh, Dee, don't be jealous." He smiled at the puzzled black-haired man. "You're the only guy I've had sex with. But..." Again, he blushed.

"But?" Dee pressed, and watched his partner blush deeper.

"Oh, go to bed." Ryo stood up now, blushing harder than he had been and started to head for the door. "I... I 'll go sleep on the window seat."

Dee frowned. "No friggin' way, Ryo!" He stood, almost tripping over his sweats, managed to get out of them and chase down the Japanese-American, knocking him almost violently into the window seat. "I wanna know how you learned that!"

"Ah..." Ryo blushed. "Would you believe dumb luck?"

"No." Dee's face was straight-laced as he pinned down his partner.

"Well..." Ryo blushed more darkly, looking aside. "Would you believe... I've uh... Been practicing?"

Dee felt his face fall into a look of pure shock as he looked down at his half-asian partner, before a small smirk crept into his face. "Practicing, sweet Randy? On what?"

Ryo just blushed darker and shoved Dee off, standing and straightening his non-existant tie. "None of your business."

Dee, from his posistion on the floor, pouted, watching as Ryo moved to pour himself a cup of slightly-tepid tea and take a sip.

Finally pulling himself off the floor, Dee smirked faintly. "Well... I'll not ask you again... I'll just search your room next time I'm over."

Dee heard Ryo gag on his tea, before starting to cough violently.

Walking over to stroke his partner's back gently, soothing the coughing a little, Dee watched Ryo's eyes move from where they had been cast floorward, to where they were staring directly at his own with a very dark look which implied 'don't you dare.'

Dee grinned and slapped Ryo on the back, not caring that he started to cough again harshly at the gesture, before turning and moving back towards his room. "Don't worry, I won't give you too much hell over it if you got a dildo in there or something! Goodnight now, Cop!"

Laughing still, Dee crossed into his room and shut the door behind him, ignoring the darkened glares that were being leveled at him by a certain chestnut-haired man.

'Dammit, Dee! I'm so going to get you if you even do that!' Was all Ryo thought as he took a sip of his tea, trying to calm the slight tickle in his throat that threatened to send him into another spasm of coughs.

And while inside the small apartment, evil plots and little giggles of giddiness pierced the air, below, the city of New York moved on, as noisy and bousterous as always.

OWARI

Bikky:My eyes! I'm blind! I'm blind!

Lai:Serves you right for looking over her shoulder while she writes! You know she writes this stuff sometimes.

Bikky:Still! My eyes! I didn't wanna see Dee anymore nude that he usually is when hanging around!

Carol:I did!

Bikky:... Why do I have to have you as a girlfriend?

Carol:'Cause I'm cute!

Bikky proceeds to glare at Carol, who only smiles back, while Lai roles his eyes and pretends to find something more interesting on the ceiling