(AN: You guys… I can't believe what I just now did. I finished watching all of my Garfield and Friends DVDs. All fifteen of them… I have now seen every. Single. Garfield and Friends episode. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself until Animaniacs, Pinky and the Brain, and Darkwing Duck come out on DVD later this year, ha ha!

But anyhoo, here's chapter eleven. Thanks for all the reviews—you guys rock.)

O.o.O

"…and I leave my dust collection to Orson, and my collection of all the feathers that have flown off my body during my moments of panic to Roy if he ever comes back, and Bo, you can have… actually, I don't collect anything else, everything else scares me."

"You're not going to die, man," said Bo comfortingly, piecing together a splint out of wood and yarn from the barn. "It's, like, just a simple fracture."

Wade's eyes grew wide as he watched Bo at work. "Are you medically qualified for this?"

"Like, don't worry, man!" said Bo. "I took a first aid class awhile ago. Now, just hold your wing still—"

"Oh no, stay away from me!" cried Wade, jumping up as well as he could, his good wing shielding himself.

"Dude, I'm your friend," said Bo. "You can trust me."

"I trust you, but I don't trust your medical skills!" cried Wade. "Oh, what's the use?" He flopped down on the straw he had been laying on. "I'm going to perish as it is… please, Bo, be gentle and make it quick! I don't want to suffer any more than I am now!"

"Just hold your wing still, man," said Bo, steadying the splint. "Stop moving—it'll hurt if you're moving."

"It hurts when I hold it still, too," moaned Wade.

"Don't move—this'll only take a second—I've gotta set your wing in place—"

"AAAAAHHH! THE PAIN!"

"And… here we go!" Bo quickly finished up his work. "There ya go, Wade! In, like, six weeks your wing will be all set again, pun intended!"

"You told me that wouldn't hurt!" cried Wade, pointing an accusing finger at Bo. His other arm, now safe in its splint and sling, was held by his side, where it would have to remain for six weeks.

"Like, you were moving, dude," said Bo matter-of-factly. "I had to reset your wing."

"If you weren't such a good friend of mine, I would have totally lost all trust in you just then!" cried Wade accusingly. "But as I'm going to die anyway, I suppose it doesn't matter—"

"Dude." Bo pressed his hand against his face and shook his head slowly. "You're not gonna die."

"Oh, Colonel Sanders butcher me!"

Lanolin had arrived with Tonya, and the sheep had apparently told the chick what had happened to Wade thanks to her bear pit. Tonya ran to Wade's side, blubbering apologies.

"Holy barbeque sauce. I am so sorry! If I had known that an innocent would be seriously harmed by my pranks, I wouldn't have dug that pit in the first place. I mean, emotional humiliation, sure. I'm okay with that. Especially to a guy like Buffy Bucky who deserves it. But you? You poor thing, you didn't do anything! You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time—and if it weren't for me you wouldn't be hurt! I'm so terrible!"

"I wish Roy felt this bad about his pranks," Lanolin muttered.

"Yeah, but, like Roy's never hurt anyone, sis. Physically, I mean," Bo reminded her.

"Thank sod Mom isn't here, otherwise I'd be dead right now," said Tonya.

"Like I'm going to be dead in a few scant minutes?" cried Wade dramatically.

Tonya blinked. "You? The sheep told me you only broke a wing!"

"Like, he did," said Bo. "But Wade has a tendency to overreact to things like this, man… uh, I mean, girl."

"I'm not overreacting!" cried Wade dramatically. "Nothing this bad has ever happened to me before!"

"It's not gonna kill ya, you drama queen," said Lanolin, rolling her eyes.

"Regardless of whether or not you'll live, and I have a feeling you will, but…" Tonya took Wade's good wing in her own and looked up at him, sadly apologetic. "I'm so sorry that this had to happen to you… Wade."

"Oh…" Wade shrugged. "That's alright, it's not like your death was your fault, uh…"

"Tonya."

"Tonya," finished Wade. Despite the fear that was racking every nerve of his body at his impending (but surprisingly slow in coming) death, he couldn't help but smile at the young hen. She, unlike that terrifying Buck, had actually bothered to learn his name!

"Well, gang…" Orson had just entered the barn.

"Did you get rid of him, or did you decide to be 'nice' to the 'poor' rooster and let him stay?" Lanolin spat out.

Orson sighed, causing Lanolin, Bo, and Tonya to sigh as well. They knew perfectly well what the outcome of Orson's plea had been before he even divulged it. "I explained the whole situation to him, but the farmer is adamant. We need a rooster here. And before you ask me if I suggest that he just get a new rooster altogether," said Orson quickly, cutting off Lanolin before she had a chance to raise a protest, "yes, I did suggest that. But apparently Buck is a superior breed of rooster, very rare and valuable, and…"

"But he's violent!" cried Tonya. "He hurt Wade!"

"Yeah, did you think to mention that, genius?" Lanolin snapped.

"I did bring that up," said Orson unhappily. "And the thing is, if it had been anyone else he might have relented and gotten rid of Buck. But… unlike the rest of us, Wade isn't the farmer's property. As far as the farmer cares, Wade, you're just a cowardly duck who wandered on the farm wanting a safe place to stay."

"There's a lot of truth to that," Wade pointed out.

"So, like, you're saying that since the farmer doesn't technically own Wade, he doesn't care if he got hurt?" Bo clarified.

Orson nodded. "That's the gist of it, yes."

"That's a load of bull," snapped Lanolin. "Wade's a big help around here, regardless of whether or not he's the 'farmer's property'!"

"And regardless of how many times I have abandoned my duties to run off in a panic!" Wade threw in.

"Look, you guys… The farmer's not going to get rid of Buck," said Orson, sounding defeated. "He's not going to just throw his prize rooster out on the street."

"Well, then, we'll get rid of him!" cried Tonya. "The Tonya Treatment has only just begun! I can humiliate that guy so badly his kids will be born blushing! You just leave it to me, Porky, and I'll—"

"Tonya," said Orson, grabbing her beak and shutting her up, "I don't want you to harass Buck anymore."

"What?" cried Tonya.

"Aw, come on!" cried Bo.

"She's the only one of us who can get rid of him now!" cried Lanolin. "You can't tell her to stop!"

"Lanolin, I'm as fed up with Buck as you are, but there's nothing we can do about it! And if Tonya keeps this up, someone's going to get hurt. Wade's already broken a wing—next time it could be worse. Besides, Tonya, your exploits are only aggravating Buck and making him mad—and he might hurt you. In fact, he already did. I don't want to see you getting hurt again."

"Me either," said Wade. "He hurt you? Ooh, he's scary and low-down!"

"It didn't hurt that bad," muttered Tonya. "Besides, I can stand it in the name of getting rid of him."

"Uh… unless if I was seeing things, I seem to recall him strangling you," said Orson.

"Now look—" began Tonya.

"You've got to stop, Tonya," said Orson firmly. "You don't want your mother coming back to a dead child, do you?"

Wade made a squeaking noise of horror.

"Like, stop exaggerating, man," said Bo. "You're scaring Ducko here."

"I'm not going to let him—"

"Tonya! No more tricks, pranks, anything!"

"You're not my mother," sulked Tonya, although by the way her shoulders slumped, it was obvious that she had given in to Orson's pleading.

"It's for your own protection—and everyone else's," said Orson gently. "Remember, it was one of your attacks on Buck that gave Wade his broken wing."

"Thanks for the guilt trip," sighed Tonya. "Look, I'll… I'll lay off Buck, okay?" She snorted. "Doesn't matter much anyway—pretty soon, Mom'll be back with Booker, Sheldon, and Roy, and then things will change! Then we'll drive him off of here!"

"Tonya—" Orson began.

"Look, us chickens gotta stick together, and us chickens have a right to kick out another annoying chicken. I can't do it on my own, but with my mom and brothers back, we'll get him outta here. Trust me."

"Sounds like a plan to me," said Lanolin. "The sooner we get that creep outta here, the better."

"Like, ditto," said Bo. "I don't wanna see all of us on the farm wearing slings on our arms."

"And I don't want to see the rest of you guys dead like me—" Wade began.

"YOU'RE NOT GOING TO DIE!"Orson, Bo, Lanolin, and Tonya all bellowed.

"If you say so," squeaked Wade, who had instantly shrunk down, almost inside his inner tube.

"I'd better go check on my siblings," said Tonya. With a quick nod to Orson, Bo, and Lanolin, and a friendly smile to Wade, she walked out of the barn and to the henhouse, mulling over everything that had just happened in her mind.

Were they trying to make her feel like manure, or did it just accidentally happen that way? Tonya irritably kicked up a patch of dirt, sending it flying. They sounded just like her mother—it wasn't like she dug that trap expecting the duck to fall in! She was trying to get rid of that damn rooster—and of all people, Wade would appreciate his departure the most! Things would only continue to get worse if Buck wasn't kept on his toes all the time.

But… Tonya had made a promise, and seeing how shocked Wade had been at the mention of her getting hurt was enough to cement that promise in her mind. She said she wouldn't continue to harass Buck—and she wouldn't. She was a hen of her word.

The rustling of stray grass and dirt next to her informed her that her brother Alexander was there, sitting next to her—of course it was Alexander, none of her other siblings was so close to her to sit down by her when she was obviously upset. "So, uh…" Alexander began. "What are you going to do to Buck tomorrow?"

"Nothing," said Tonya. Alexander gave her a look of honest confusion. Tonya sighed. "Wade—the duck—he fell into that trap. Actually, Buck pushed him in. But anyway, his wing is broken and he's in a lot of pain because of something I did. I don't want to hurt innocent people anymore. Besides," she spat out, "Orson told me I couldn't harass Buck anymore."

"Why not?" asked Alexander softly.

"Because he doesn't want to see anyone else get hurt either," sighed Tonya. "I guess… I guess I can see where he's coming from. But how are we supposed to get rid of him?"

The siblings were quiet for a moment.

"I'm sure you'll think of something, Tonya," Alexander finally said, wrapping his small wings around her waist in a brotherly hug. "You're really smart."

Tonya returned the hug, although she wasn't sure she could share Alexander's optimism. How could she get rid of that slime bag by being… nice? And how would they live on the farm if he continued to live there—what if he hurt Wade again? What if he hurt Alexander?

What was she supposed to do?

O.o.O

(AN: That chapter was more of a filler… sorry, but hey, those filler chapters are needed sometimes. Hopefully next chapter it'll get more interesting… either that or this story will fall flat on its face, as I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to end it. I should never again start a story without knowing exactly how it'll end—yeah, like THAT will ever happen. ;)

And please, someone, slap me upside the head before I try to romantically pair up Wade and Tonya. Aarrgh, damn plot bunny! Must… get… random… pairing… out… of… head…

See you next chapter, if you can still put up with me… I don't know how you guys do it. Heh. But seriously, chapter next ahoy… see you then!)