(The helicopter lands on the island. Mystique, Pyro, Wanda, and Toad step out of the air vessel.)
Toad: Those hydraulics were kinda fun!
Pyro: See! Aren't you glad that I update things!
Wanda: (Thinking.) Is it me or was I just…staring at Toad! Ugh. Snap out of it, girl! (Frustrated sigh.) It's been a long day. Perhaps a nice long bath will bring me to my senses about…him…
Pyro: (Bragging to Toad.) And maybe, someday, I'll pimp out the entire lair!
Toad: Don't get too ahead of yourself, pretty boy…The only way you'll be redecorating my room is over my cold, dead carcass.
Pyro: Then again, maybe I won't be fixing up your room. I've been in there before and, I've gotta yell you, it's offensive to all five senses!
(Laugh track.)
Toad: When…and why…were you in my room!
Pyro: To look for your diary of course! I figured I could blackmail you with it later.
Toad: Ha! You'd never find it; I hid it too well… But I'm still going to kill you nonetheless!
Pyro: Bring it!
Wanda: Take your stupid quarrels outside. I'm taking a nice, long bubble bath and I don't want any interruptions.
Audience: Woo! (Whistle, whistle.)
Wanda: (Yelling at audience.) And just what was that for! Nuh-uh! This isn't some wild, erotic hot tub party! I'm not going to invite you in with me! I am a woman of class! So you can just take your 'sex on TV' antics and shove it!
Mystique: (Yelling from a completely different room.) Girl power!
Toad: (Whispering to Pyro.) Hey! How come we guys don't have any fun catch phrases?
Pyro: I have no idea. But all this "female dominance" stuff has taken away my will to fight. I'm going to fix the TV. Maybe I'll install TEVO or something.
Toad: (Half heartedly.) Good luck.
(Princess begins rubbing up against Toad's leg.)
Toad: Hey, pretty! Who wants their fur brushed!
Princess: Mew!
(Toad picks up the cat and returns to his room. Pyro chuckles to himself as he rolls up his sleeves and heads toward the television.)
About an Hour Later…
(Wanda is still relaxing in the bathtub. The bubbles perfectly censor her body.)
Wanda: (Thinking.) I still can't get him out of my mind. This is terrible! And I only started to like him since he'd went out and gotten that cat. When he's holding Princess he's like a completely different person. He's…nicer…more in touch with his feminine side. It's actually…cute!
(A loud banging noise is heard from behind the door. Wanda angrily rolls her eyes.)
Wanda: (Calling to whatever's making the noise from behind the door.) Whoever's knocking, you can take your business to one of the plants outside! I'm not getting out of this bathtub until I'm completely rested!
Pietro: Wanda! Listen to me! Pyro…he—
(Crash!)
Pietro: He did something to the TV and now it's on the loose! We can't stop it. It's like it has a mind of its own!
Pyro: I was just trying to install TEVO! How was I supposed to know this would happen!
Pietro: Oh shut up, you moron! You brought us into this and now you have to fix it!
(Toad leaves his room only to see that the TV has sprouted robotic legs and is wreaking havoc on the lair.)
Toad: What the—
(The giant TEVO monster picks up Toad and throws him into the bathroom door.)
Toad: AAAAAHHH!
(Toad crashes through the door and lands onto the bathroom floor before Wanda. Toad and Wanda stare at each other in awkward silence.)
Toad: By the way, that time, it really was an accident.
Wanda: So much for my nice, long bubble bath… (Sigh.) I believe you. Now leave so I can change and I'll be joining the rest of the Brotherhood in a moment…
Toad: …Right…
(Toad jumps off the floor and bolts out of the room, closing the door behind him.)
Wanda: Men…
About Fifteen Minutes Later…
(The rest of the Brotherhood is running for their lives as the TEVO monster shoots lasers from its screen.)
TEVO: (In evil robotic voice.) Now you can purchase movies on demand without the fuss of having to go to your local rental store! Give in to TEVO!
Toad: (As he frantically dodges electronic blasts.) Okay! Now, I had a feeling that TV would someday take over the world, but not like this!
TEVO: TEVO will enslave the Earth with movies beyond one's wildest dreams! You will submit to TEVO's overwhelming power!
Announcer: this isn't any sitcom anymore! It's an all out horror story!
TEVO: SILENCE, MORTAL! You will succumb to TEVO's awesomeness!
(TEVO monster starts to shoot more electricity.)
Sabertooth: That's it! ROAR!
TEVO: Feel thy wrath, infidel!
(Sabertooth closes in on TEVO, about to commence a devastating attack. Suddenly, TEVO zaps Sabertooth and he falls unconscious.)
Pietro: No!
(TEVO begins shooting lasers again. Pietro skillfully dodges the electronic blasts.)
Pietro: Perhaps, if the television is plugged in, I can snap its chord to prevent it from shooting its electronic blasts.
(Pietro dashes over to where the television is plugged into the wall and snaps the wire in half.)
TEVO: You think you can defeat me, you tiny fool! I will vanquish you!
(TEVO begins whipping the chord around violently. Pietro moves out of the way just in time, but the other Brotherhood members aren't so lucky. The chord whips and burns Pyro in the chest.)
Pyro: (Falling to the ground.) Ugh!
Blob: All right! That does it!
(Blob jumps up into the air in hopes to squash the TV on his way down.)
TEVO: Pitiful attempt!
(TEVO lifts up its antennae. Blob lands on the television. Just when it looks like Blob has defeated TEVO, Blob's eyes widen in surprise. He jumps off the TV, holding his rear in pain, and into the air again.)
Blob: YEOWCH!
Pyro: Aw! That really hurt…
(Pyro looks up to see that Blob is about to land on him.)
Pyro: NOT AGAIN!
(Pyro rolls out of the way just in time before Blob hits the ground.)
TEVO: Mwahahahahahahahahaha!
Pyro: I've had too many near death experiences today! This is clearly abuse!
Toad: You think you've been abused!
(Pyro looks up to see that TEVO's wire is now wrapped around Toad. TEVO is giving him numerous electrical shocks. Toad's teeth are chattering from the high amounts of volts being given to him.)
(While this is going on, Mystique has disguised herself as another antenna on the TV. Just as she's about to do some damage to TEVO, TEVO sees her and bashes Toad into her, rendering her unconscious.)
Toad: Oh what a predicament I've gotten myself into! Why, o why!
TEVO: Escape is futile! Embrace your death, you amphibious dolt! Mwahahahahaha!
(Just then, Princess appears. She sees her beloved owner in trouble and hisses at the giant TEVO monster. Princess charges towards it.)
TEVO: What's this! Your pathetic cat friend is trying to save you! How disgustingly adorable! I shall dispatch of both you and this feline pest!
Toad: Kitty, no!
(Princess leaps towards the TEVO, claws out.)
Toad: I LOVE YOU!
(Just as the TEVO monster is going to grab and electrocute the cat to death, Toad unleashes one of his slime balls. The slime ball hits the cat before the TEVO, locking her in a protective shell.)
TEVO: What's this! I can't zap her! YOU!
(TEVO begins zapping Toad with all the electricity it has.)
Toad: I guess… (Cough.) …this is… (Cough, cough.) …goodbye…
(Just then, Wanda appears wearing a towel around her waist and a turban on her head.)
Wanda: Is that all it is! I could dispatch that thing in ten seconds!
(Wanda uses her hex power to make TEVO release Toad.)
TEVO: WHAT!
(Wanda narrows her eyes at TEVO and sends off one last hexing spell.)
TEVO: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(The TV explodes into a million pieces. There is a long pause in between.)
Pyro: Well…So much for our weekly movie night.
Wanda: You're cleaning this mess up!
Pyro: Why me!
(The Brotherhood gives Pyro a long, cold stare.)
Pyro: Fine…
(Wanda walks over to a very charred Toad.)
Wanda: Are you alright?
(Toad coughs up a big cloud of black smoke.)
Toad: Yeah…I think I'll be fine. Where's kitty?
(Toad looks over to see the little slime ball he's made. He smiles with glee and takes Princess out of the mess.)
Toad: How's my little heroine! You tried to save me, didn't you! Yes you did!
(Toad tries to pet Princess but his hands get stuck to her fur. Toad gasps in realization as to what he's done.)
Toad: Oh no!
(Toad picks up Princess and runs to the bathroom.)