A For Angst
She stood quiet near the bedroom's door, staring at him with a sad gleam on her blue eyes, unable to mumble a word of comfort to the man she admired, the man that rescued her from her dark past, the man that showed her that she could know the meaning of love once again.
He was sitting on the couch, with his eyes closed, drinking a scotch to relieve the pain that was consuming him because of what they had done…once more.
He talked to her several times about these nights of sinful sex, saying that they shouldn't pursue this course of tragic events; their relationship was based on false hopes and that was the main reason they couldn't have a bright future as a couple. He just couldn't bear the look of sadness on her face anymore, her constant attacks of crying every time she remembered his failure to be the man she wished him to be. Gregory House was absolutely sure that one day he was going to do something that would destroy her and that thought was consuming him.
She knows perfectly well that he doesn't love her, he said it several times; House is a man that just can't afford to believe in these kinds of feelings. Words like love, compassion, friendship and sympathy were erased from his dictionary a long time ago; he didn't have any use for them anymore.
'I need my misery, my arrogance, my nihilism, these are the true feelings that keep alive, not…not a hypothetic love for you, Cameron,' he once said to her while she was dressing in the leaving room.
She never condemned him for his behaviour; he saw things in life that she could only imagine, things that destroyed his faith in the human race, things that were keeping them apart…
How could a man that has everything, intelligence, passion for his work, looks, admiration from his co-workers, be so cold hearted to other people? What kind of experience had enough power to bring this ocean of sadness to the life of this extraordinary man?
His leg can't be the answer to that question, many people continued with their lives after an incident that almost wiped them off from the face of the Earth. Even Wilson, the only person that remained by his side after he got out of the hospital can't understand the cause to such drastic change.
"For all the men you could fall in love with, you had to fall for House," he once let it slip during a conversation. "Don't get me wrong, I love the man like a brother, but since Stacy left him…the man repressed all his emotions."
Cameron didn't agree or disagree with him; she must be the last person on Earth with enough moral to judge another human being.
Gregory House wasn't the only one with a terrible past; she alone had a couple of secrets that were consuming her fragile soul since she entered into adulthood.
While she was in college, she used to be a really party girl, consuming alcohol, drugs, sleeping with every man that showed the slightest interest in her.
During one of those night stands, she got pregnant at the tender age of seventeen, without knowing who the father was. Her first reaction was to make an abortion, a horrible thought that appeared to her during a moment of total desperation, but after much consideration she decided that it wasn't the child's fault she got into those passives sexual adventures.