3rd and final chapter...

A/N: I had to shamelessly squeeze in a Buffy reference, since it's one of my other favorite shows. :)

Disclaimer: I don't own nuthin'.


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Olivia paused and took a deep breath before bringing her hand up to the door. She placed her palm against it in a kind of prayer, before closing her hand into a fist and knocking. She heard the television on inside, but wondered if he'd answer the door. Maybe the kids were there. Maybe he wasn't up for visitors—especially not her. Maybe—

The door opened and Elliot frowned when he saw her. "Liv, I don't know if this is such a good idea."

"I just want to talk, Elliot," she said firmly.

"That's the problem. I don't know what to say," he said, his eyes down.

"El," she said quietly. "I can't honestly believe you don't think you can talk to me. It's me."

"Again, that's the problem," Elliot said, now looking into her face. He saw her begin to doubt herself, to turn away slightly. "But I'll try." He stood aside and held the door open for her.

Minutes had passed since they'd made their way to the couch, and neither had spoken. Olivia looked from the television to her partner. "So…Buffy, huh?

"Well, come on," Elliot said sheepishly. "She's hot, and she kills the bad guy. And she's hot."

"I can see why you didn't want to talk," Olivia teased. "Hard to form words in the presence of Buffy."

Elliot turned to her, sobering. He picked up the remote and turned off the TV. "So we get rid of the distractions," he said with a tight smile. "You want to talk about what I said today."

"No," she said, surprising him. "I just want to talk. I think if we'd done that sooner, it might not have come down to an ultimatum."

"Liv, I didn't mean it like that. I was just…"

"Scared," she finished. Noting his slightly offended expression, she amended herself. "Worried. That if you let me in, it'll be easier to lose me."

"You been talking to Huang?" Elliot asked. Olivia blanched before she realized he was kidding, trying to laugh off a point that'd hit too close to home.

"If I'm off base here, feel free to correct me."

"Okay," he said, lacing his fingers together.

"Okay?" Olivia asked, confused.

"Okay, I will. If you go off base. Which you haven't."

"Yet," she said, smiling lightly. She knew how hard it was for him to admit she was on target, that he really was scared. Well, "worried."

"What else you got, doc?" he asked gamely.

"Oh, let's not go that far," Olivia said, holding her hands up defensively. "I was just trying to help. I'd rather listen for a while, if it's okay with you."

"Now who's scared?" Elliot asked, but there was levity underneath his words, and Olivia relaxed.

"You got me. I'm afraid of pissing you off."

"You should be. I'm a loose cannon, you know." He winked at her, but didn't miss her horrified expression. "Liv, I'm not completely oblivious. I know what people say about me, and I haven't exactly been the picture of mental health lately."

"You're fine, El. Just stressed out, with Kathy and everything…" She stopped, knowing anything else she said would only close him off more.

"Thanks, Olivia."

"I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I'm just making it worse—"

"No, really, Liv. Thank you for finding me sane. You're one of the few."

"And yet you won't talk to me." It was a risk, but if she wanted him talking, she had to brave the elements.

Instead of blowing up, he sighed resignedly. "You're right."

"I am?" she asked, feigning a great deal more shock than she felt.

"Don't pass out on me now," Elliot laughed. "Unless you're wearing that black bra I like so much—"

"Elliot!" Olivia shrieked, smacking him in the arm. "For that, you owe me some conversation."

"All you chicks are the same," he said, smiling. "Talk, talk, talk."

Olivia cocked her eyebrow at him, and he rolled his eyes.

"Fine. I give." But his expression was less annoyed than he wanted her to believe, and he knew he wasn't fooling her. "You're right that this thing with Kathy is spinning my head. I don't know how it's all going to shake out, but whatever happens, it's not gonna be easy. In fact, the only thing easy about it was that I knew you'd be there for me." He looked down at his hands, still locked together, white-knuckled. "And then…I just couldn't. I couldn't talk about it. Not with you."

"Why not with me?" she asked gently.

"I felt—I blamed you. Not you personally, but my relationship with you. The time I spent with you. The way I trusted you, relied on you. Gave you more of myself than I gave Kathy. She was right, Liv. I gave it all to the job, to you. I didn't save anything for her. And the worst part is…I knew it, and I didn't stop it. I didn't care." He looked into her face, and his eyes were ice and self loathing. "What does that say about me? I ruined my marriage and blamed you for it. And then I didn't even have the guts to tell you."

Olivia's heart went out to him, and her hands moved to his. She pried his fingers apart and slid her hands between his. "El, don't say that. Don't even think it. You're my partner. You get paid to spend time with me. You can't blame our partnership for what's happening with your marriage. And I'm not saying that to defend myself or our jobs, or to give marriage the Munch seal of disapproval. These things happen. You and Kathy both have a part in it, but to say you jeopardized your marriage for your job—Elliot, you work the hell out of this job, and I don't ever want to hear you fault your dedication for what happened with Kathy." She took a breath and looked into Elliot's eyes. She wasn't surprised to see tears in them. "I guess I get a little territorial when it comes to our work. And our friendship. I never want you to doubt the importance of what you do. And I never want you to think you can't talk to me."

Elliot gripped her hands in his roughly. "Well, I won't now. On threat of death, huh?" He grinned at his partner, suddenly amazed at the choice he'd put to her earlier in the day. "Liv, what I said at the hospital…I didn't mean…" He fumbled in words, felt barraged and failed by them. "When I said I didn't want to lose you, I meant that. I thought I had to choose the arena of our relationship: either work or personal. I was wrong. We work better together because we care. Not in spite of it."

She smiled at him. Step by excruciating step, he would let her help him through this.

"I suppose you already knew that," he said sheepishly.

"Intermittently," she admitted.

"Hug it out?" He pulled her hands toward him and she fell into him gratefully, if not gracefully. "Oof—Liv! I'm not even single yet. Hands off!"

"Cad," Olivia laughed, extricating herself from his lap. "Now, there was some Buffy on TV?"

Elliot laughed and grabbed the remote, but kept one hand in his partner's. He had regained his balance.


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"Cap, can I see you a minute?" Olivia asked, poking her head into Cragen's office.

He feared what she might say, but invited her in. He was surprised when she pulled Elliot in with her.

"I just wanted to ask…I want to request a—an old partner." She smiled at her boss, who had a picture-perfect expression of relief on his face.

"Request granted," Cragen said with a gruffness that didn't fool any of them. He smiled as he lowered his head back to the papers on his desk. "Now get back to work."


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A/N: I know, I know - it's not a romantic ending, but I don't want to rush them. You know it all rolls downhill from the bedroom. :)