Dear Rory
I'm back, I know, it was a short trip. I don't know if this is a one shot or what, I wrote it and so, here it is. What do you think?
It's like my mom says, I don't have very many people in my life who are in my life, forever; they will always be there for me and I will always be there for them. I mean, there's my mom, Lorelai, and Luke, my step-dad, my grandparents, my two best girl friends, Lane and Paris. There's also Sookie and Jackson and the people of Stars Hallow and finally, after all these years, my dad, Christopher, he's a permanent person in my life. And then there's also my ex's, Paris says that I am the only person she knows capable of remaining really good friends with all three of my ex-boyfriends.
Ya, that's right I said it, all three of them; Dean, Jess and Logan, they are each still an important part of my life, but purely platonic.
Dean- my first everything occurred with him; my first kiss, my first school dance, he was my first boyfriend, gave me my first broken heart and my first sexual experience happened with him. Dean's still living in Stars Hallow, working construction for Tom. For me, he's like that old, comfortable sweater that reminds you of home, dependable and warm, he takes me back to the way things used to be, the person that I used to be once upon a time, the person that somehow got lost between the shuffles of daily life. I call Dean when I just need to talk and need someone to listen. Mom, Lane and Paris tell me that he's still pining for me, I always tell them they're crazy, but are they?
Jess has parked himself permanently in Philadelphia and become a part of the artsy, creative scene. He's been working for this publishing company for about seven or eight years now, he has written a few short novels. He also opened a coffee shop/art gallery/publishing house with some guys from work. He's doing really well, and I'm really proud of him, I know that Luke is too. Jess has been dating this girl Reagan for about a year and a half. I've met her a few times, she's a poet slash singer/songwriter, kind of Lisa Loeb meets Sarah McLaughlin. It's strange; Jess disappeared from my life with a rush once upon a time and reentered in a time of great need. He's Luke's nephew, and my mom and Luke are married, so in some twisted way, that kind of makes Jess my cousin. I guess we do have more of a cousin relationship now. Jess says that he knows me better than anyone, I always thought that mom held that title, but maybe he's right, maybe I let him see parts of me that I never let mom or anyone else see. Do you think that that's true, that we show different people in our lives different pieces of ourselves that we don't divulge to anyone else? Is there any way to bring all those little pieces of myself together to make it one whole? Do we ever let anyone see each and every piece of ourselves? As I was saying, Jess thinks he knows me so well; I call him when I need someone to tell me the truth. That's one thing about Jess, he'll always tell me the truth about myself, whether I want to hear it or not, but the funny thing is that in the end, it's always something I need to hear. And what he says I usually take to heart and reevaluate myself because of what he's said and hopefully come out better and renewed. That's the thing about all of these people that are a part of my life, I am better because of them, even because of my ex's and all that I've gone through with each.
And then there's Logan, the person who once upon a time I would have called the love of my life. He and I broke up after I graduated from Yale. He calls both New York and London home. He's busy learning how to run his father's newspaper company and will be taking over soon. Logan is my traveling companion; I've been all over with him. His sister, Honor, is also a really good friend and permanent fixture in my life. In fact, Logan and I share god-parent duty for Honor and Josh's four year old daughter Abigail; we're her Uncle Logan and Aunt Rory. I'm still the ear that Logan bends to talk about work or complain about his father or his family life. His parents, the great Mitchum and Shira, are relentless about finding him a wife. They continuously set him up with these Goldie-locks girls, with names like Tiffany, Amber, and Bunny. Logan is the same old Logan. Occasionally, I see the rest of his gang, usually when my grandparents drag me to some bitty affair and we need to form a sub-party. It's good to see the old gang; Finn, Colin, Rosemary and Juliet, once in awhile, reminds me of my Yale days, the good old days.
As for me, I call Boston home these days, I write and edit for the Boston Globe, a paper that of course, Mitchum Huntzberger, Logan's father, eventually bought. Along with one of the top writers and doing some editing, they asked me to write my own column, "Dear Rory. Can you imagine me, little Rory Gilmore giving other people advice? My own love life is rather non-existent, most nights I spend either working at the office or having dinner and watching movies with my dad and ten year old sister, who I now live about fifteen minutes away from. I haven't had a long term relationship since Logan; I've dated four or five guys since, but nothing permanent, the longest lasted six months, a fling more than a relationship with a guy from work. The shortest relationship I've ever had was a two week relationship with a guy that grandma set me up with, it was fun while it lasted, he was a nice enough guy, more of an escort, we were for each other someone to date, bring to these swanky affairs that rich people throw. Between work and my grandparents I actually end up having to attend a lot of these things, but with my three ex's around, I hardly ever struggle to find a date. But still, at twenty-seven years old there's a lot of pressure, Honor always asks when I'm going to get married and my grandparents would like to me alive to see me get married and have a family. "All the good husbands will be taken soon Rory!" reminds my Emily Gilmore. I feel like I'm Carrie Bradshaw, just not in New York and it's been quite awhile since I've gotten some.
I go home to Stars Hallow often, still Friday night dinners to attend in Hartford and then home with mom and Luke, time spent with Lane, if she and Hep Alien aren't touring, right now they're touring Germany. Paris is a doctor in New York, she and Doyle are still going strong, Logan hooked him up with a job in the newspaper industry. Nepotism is what makes the world go around you know. Everyone else is moving along, doing well, and I feel like I'm just standing still. I love my work and the circle of people that make up my life; truly, I feel like I win the lottery every single day, but still something's missing, but what? I don't need a man in my life, but I've never gone this long without having one. I don't know what to think.