Cheryl sank further into the pillow, 'please don't do this, Sara,' she mumbled.
'Cheryl,' Said Grissom, 'whilst I don't agree with Sara as to what she brought up, or as to how she brought this subject up, especially in front of everyone, if this is something which could affect the integrity of the lab, and my CSIs, I'm going to have to ask for an explanation.'
Cheryl shut her eyes. For a while it seemed like she wasn't going to speak. Then she opened her eyes and looked around the room. Greg had frozen in place, Warrick was looking at her with a confused expression on his face, and Catherine looked worried. Nick, whilst he was still holding her hand, wasn't looking at her, Grissom was staring at her expressionless, and Sara was glaring smugly.
'You know, Sara, spilt out like that, my life seems somewhat tragic, but I have never thought about it that way. I admit, I tend to run away from my troubles, it's the easy thing to do. But I had a wonderful mother who loved me, and supported me, and was proud of me. My step-father didn't have children, but he love me like I was his own, and we got on really well. He was proud of me and let me do what I needed to, and he supported me both in my decisions, and financially. Even though he is dead, he left me enough shares in his company that I am one of two majority holders, even though I don't work directly for them, he also left me one of the biggest apartments in Manhattan that you could imagine, which my old partner lives in with a paramedic who was assigned to the firehouse opposite our PD. And they haven't paid me rent in over six months, but it doesn't matter.
'My ex-partner even has one of my cars, which was a present from my step-father on my eighteenth birthday, because he knew how much I loved cars. I don't question him having it. I don't question them not paying the rent. With its space, and location, they couldn't afford a month's rent if they combined their wages for a year. They're my friends, brothers almost, and they were there for me then, and they will be there for me now. So despite how horrific and bad my life has seemed to lay it all out like that, I never thought of it like that.
'For the last two months in Miami, I was happy. Truly happy.' She began to explain, her voice finally breaking. 'Sure I'm young, I get ID'd all the time, mistaken for a child, and even accused left, right and centre of being too inexperienced to do my job properly, but I was healthy and fit, and not trying to sound big headed, I'm not bad looking and, well, pretty damn intelligent. I had a great job, which I really enjoyed. I found a real family member who loved me like I was his own daughter, and even now, would take a bullet for me. Lord knows he's put his neck out for me on more than one occasion, like he has with pretty much everyone else I worked with, never asking for anything in return.
'My colleagues loved me like I was a sister, and Calleigh has since told me that the hardest thing she ever had to do was shoot me, because it felt like she was shooting her sister. Eric has three other sisters and still treated me like a younger sister, which was sometimes a pain in the neck, but he was there for me. And then there was Tim, the guy I took a bullet for. The man whom I was living with. And I think I was really in love with him. He was the first person who I trusted and could see myself being with, for a long time.
'And then the Cole Turnall Case happened. Up until then, and this includes losing a mother, a step-father, and even discovering I would never be able to meet my real father because he had died in an undercover operation, I had never even considered feeling sorry for myself. There are people out there who have been through so much more and are still smiling. Hell, when I stopped in Baton Rouge, I spoke to one woman, a Katrina evacuee from New Orleans, who had lost her husband, two children, dog, car, job, house, sister and brother-in-law, and all her belongings – all she had was the clothes on her back, and a wedding ring, that she had been wearing for three days, whilst she was trapped on top of her roof, and she was…' Cheryl took a deep breath, 'I couldn't even begin to feel sorry for myself. I had no right.' Cheryl paused again and took another deep breath. She shut her eyes before continuing, trying, unsuccessfully to stop the tears which were now streaming down her face.
'Seven weeks ago, I worked a high profile case in Miami. I came straight from court, the day after I foundoutabout my promotion, to the hotel room of Cole Turnall, the guy who won the Pop Idol show. In his bed were two dead girls. One had died from a cocaine overdose, the other was killed when she realised that the other girl was dead. In the process of investigating, Cole asked to talk to me, and pulled a leaf from my hair. Except it was photographed from an angle which looked very compromising in the papers. His PA, who was helping him cover up the murder, leaked to the paper that I was in a relationship with him, and was going to get him off the charge, anyway I could.
'They managed to get their hands on some video footage of me kissing my boyfriend, and altered it so it looked like I was kissing Cole. And then came half of these stories,' she indicated to the papers, 'along with the accusations of me being a drug user. I have a really bad phobia of needles. That's why Horatio called and made sure I wouldn't wake up with needles in my arm. He knows what I'm like, because in the past he has had reports on his desk about a violent CSI who had hit out at medics and doctors for coming too close to me with a needle, though in my defence, my fist has only ever connected with a medic once, although I did knock him out.' She shook her head slightly, annoyed at herself for going off track.
'After this was in the news, I was investigated by IAB and taken off the case. Calleigh worked her ass off to prove it was all some fabricated nonsense, and proved that the film was faked. And then Tim and Eric discovered how Cole had murdered the girls and tried to cover it up, and he was arrested, along with his PA. But by then, the damage had been done. Tim saw the news, and trust me when I say it was a very good fake, and believed that I cheated on him, and we broke up.
'On top of all that, we, Horatio and I, found out that my half-sister had leukaemia and needed a bone marrow transplant. Her mother wasn't a match, Horatio wasn't a match, and neither was I. So Horatio had to tell his brother's wife, who was also a detective at Miami Dade PD, that not only did her husband cheat on her and have a daughter with another woman when he was undercover with her, the child had leukaemia, and we needed to see if she was a match to her son, which thankfully, he was.
'And in the process, it came out I was also her step-daughter. So even after the case was closed, and I was proved innocent, one of the detectives wouldn't work with me, and a CSI couldn't work with me. On top of all that, I was still being hounded by the press, and it got to the point whereby I was followed to crime scenes and couldn't do my job properly. I have a temper problem, as I'm sure you've noticed by now, and I tried my hardest not to do anything stupid, but after two weeks, I lost it. And hit out at a photographer. I didn't hit him, but it was enough for IAB, who were already watching the team, to put their foot down. Horatio made it so I was kept in the lab, rather than be suspended, and I had to attend anger management classes and counselling, but it had gone on too long. I wanted out. I had stopped eating, stopped sleeping; I had pretty much stopped living.
'So Horatio put out a note that I was looking for somewhere else to go, and that's when Mr. Ecklie found me and invited me here. I packed up, left my friends, left my family, and drove here, only stopping in Baton Rouge to see how everyone was after Katrina had hit, then carried on here. And what happened here? I had a decomposing body in my house, my cars got towed and I thought my belongings were gone, I was locked in a morgue, and have had you, Sara, on my case, and look, I got shot again.
'Clearly, you get on well with your colleagues, and I'm sorry if I've walked in and stirred things up. It wasn't my intention. I just wanted to get to work, and do my job, without bringing any unnecessary attention to me. I get that I am young, and probably seem too good to be true, what with what I have managed to accomplish in my short life. But I worked hard for it. I did nothing but work for it. I can count on my hands the amount of nights I had out when I was in college, even when I was in New York. I promise you now, I don't think I was ever as happy as I was in Miami, and even two weeks ago, I couldn't see me ever being happy again. And then I found out I was coming here.
'I knew it wouldn't be easy, and I didn't expect a walk in the park. In New York, I was replacing someone who had been promoted to Sergeant and had been with my partner for seven years before he was with me. He, could be, can be,' she corrected herself, 'one of the most racist, misogynistic, patronising pieces of hard work imaginable, and even though I saved his life, and got shot in the process, I spent a long time proving myself because he didn't think I was capable of doing a good job.
'Whilst guns aren't as big a problem in England, I still got hurt, stabbed, actually. Once again on my first case, and that didn't help in confirming to people that I was incapable to do the job. In London, I was the youngest person there, and in two years had excelled myself to a level past most who had been there three, four times as long, just to prove I could do the job. When I went to Miami, sure, I got shot again… on my first case, but although there were some small doubts about my experience and ability to do the job, by the time I was out of the hospital, people just let me get on with it.
'And before you say anything about me having an uncle as a boss, there were only four other people who knew about it. Besides, as the papers later found out, my father was accused of being a dirty cop. And whilst Horatio will swear blindly that this was nothing but lies, mud sticks, and I would have had to have proved myself again, whilst also trying to prove that I wasn't there because of my relationship with Horatio. I didn't do the procedure to get a promotion, or to prove myself. I did it as a way to vent my anger. And had I known I was going to get the promotion, sure I would have done it again, but I would have only released it under the condition I wouldn't get the promotion.
'I may be young, but I am not that naïve that I expect to get on with everyone and everyone like me too.' She told Sara, her voice finally rising as her temper flared, 'but I am not stupid enough to put up with this crap from you. I admit, I have probably not dealt with the many issues in my past. Hell, I have run away from them all, rather than face them, but that was my choice, and damn it, I did not need to have my past dredged up, by you, in front of everyone. If you had a problem, you could have taken me aside and I would have told you. But instead, I have had to bring up everything I have been trying hard to put behind me, just because you are insecure. Maybe I never made the best first impression with you. Sorry. But was it really a good enough reason for you to, and I can't describe it as anything else, a good enough reason for you to be nothing more than a complete bitch to me?
'If I really bother you this much, Sara, I will leave. Maybe buy that island in the Pacific and spend my life sunbathing.' All of a sudden the rage left Cheryl, and she continued, talking quietly, 'all I know is right now, I am physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. I don't have the energy left in me to keep doing this, to keep trying to prove myself.'
'Cheryl, I-' Sara tried.
'Unless you want to know things like, what sports I like, and teams I support, or you want to hear the long list of things I'm allergic to, or perhaps even, how old I was when I lost my virginity, just don't. In fact, unless you want to share every detail of your life with everyone, please, just leave.'
'Cheryl,' Sara tried again.
'I think it would be best if you just left,' Greg told her quietly. Sara looked at him. If even he was agreeing with Cheryl…
She looked at Nick, who like with Cheryl, couldn't look her in the eye, Warrick looked upset, as did Catherine, who looked like she had been crying at some point. Finally, she brought her eyes to Grissom's. He just looked disappointed. 'I'm sorry,' she said before quickly leaving.
Cheryl looked up at Grissom, 'call the Miami Dade Police Department Crime Lab, and ask to speak to Lieutenant Horatio Caine. He will confirm everything I just said.' She told him quietly.
Okely dokely, there y'all go - a double chappie for ya. Amittedly, not all that interesting, but I think that Cheryl needed to be explained (for all y'all who never read any of the previous stories. Now, keep in mind, that these two chapters summarise, um, four, other stories, so this is the 'crib-note' version)
I'm hopefully gonna have the next chapter up tomorrow morning! Thanks for reading!