May 2, 2007 (cont)

John wasn't going to allow his concern to blossom into panic. Dean was already doing enough of that for the two of them, pacing around the confines of the garage's small office, fidgetting with this and that, while John finished his call. Dean listened impatiently as his father asked all the same questions he had and obviously got the same answers.

On some level, Dean had hoped, trusted that John would just somehow fix everything with his mere presence, the way he had so many times before in Dean's life. It was agitating him that all that was happening so far was an encore of the same conversation he'd already had himself a couple of hours before.

It was an effort for John to block out the distraction of his son's animated wanderings about the room as Brady related the same information for the second time that morning. He'd last seen Sam on Sunday, the 29th. He had seemed fine, and no he hadn't mentioned any particular plans for his birthday. No, he wasn't seeing anyone special, unless you counted the grandmotherly assistant at the law library or the barista at the off-campus internet java bar. If Sam had a second phone, he didn't know anything about it and had no idea why Sam would go out and leave this one behind. Yes Sir, if...when, WHEN Sam came home, he would have him call right away.

John thanked him and ended the call, prompting Dean to cease his agitated criss cross of the room and throw his father a questioning look. He didn't say anything, but his eyes silently begged John to say that he had learned something that Dean didn't already know. He just wanted to hear that Sam was safely on a California beach celebrating his birthday sandwiched between two cheerleaders, or two football players, or two seagulls. He didn't freaking care. He just wanted to know the kid was all right.

John did find the situation troubling, but he had been down this road before. This was, however, the first time he'd had to deal with one son gone walk about and a mother hen of an older brother that needed to be talked off the ledge at the same time. "Dean, try to keep in mind that Sam is grown man. I'll grant you, this isn't the smartest thing he's ever done, but he's at that age when young men don't always think things all the way through." He caught Dean's eye with a meaningful gaze. "I know one that still had some growing up to do at 24."

Somehow that didn't make Dean feel any better about the situation or himself. "Dad, I almost bolted out there to look for him. I'd be halfway to Colorado right now if Little John hadn't caught me." He didn't know if he was confessing or confiding the depth of his concern.

John came out from behind the desk to lay a reassuring hand on his Son's shoulder. "I don't think it's come to that yet." he said.

A pained expression invaded Dean's features. "This is on me. I should have been there to look out for him."

"Dean, nobody expects you to be Sam's babysitter for the rest of his life, especially Sam." Dean looked unconvinced and John tried a different tack. "Let's say you do spend the next three days driving to Palo Alto, then what?"

Dean opened his mouth to answer. It surprised him when nothing came out. That was a fair point. What could he do? He wasn't a detective or some kind of bounty hunter. He could grill Brady yet again, maybe ask around campus a little, then what? He had to admit, he had no real plan past the part where he jumped in his car and drove like the devil. His shoulders hunched, wordlessly signaling defeat.

"Well then, what do we do?" he asked, coming somewhere between a plea and a demand. "Cause I gotta be honest with you, Dad, right now I'm still itching to break the Kansas to Cali land speed record."

"You got to know most of Sam's friends. Start making phone calls. See if any of them knows anything." At very least, John reasoned, that would give Dean something to do, a distraction from the helpless worrying. Right now the younger man was all nervous energy, barely held in check and threatening to break loose in some ill advised direction like a spooked horse at any moment.

Skeptically scrolling through his menu Dean protested, "Everybody I knew is gone now other than Brady."

"Call them anyway," John instructed firmly. "Best to know for sure." And best for you to have something to focus on, he added silently. "I'll take the area hospitals and police."

Dean's eyes flicked back up from his phone, startled and fearful. "Best to be sure," John repeated. Dean nodded but clearly wasn't very happy about it.

More than an hour inched by as the pair worked their way through every number they could think of. Dean, distracted by trying to listen in on John's calls while he made his own, didn't know whether to feel relief or disappointment every time no John Doe matching Sam's description has stumbled into a particular emergency room over the past couple of days. The law enforcement calls, by contrast, were definitely disppointing since a mid-twenties college student, missing a couple of days, the week of his birthday raised about as much concern as loud noises on the Fourth of July.

John finished up with contacting campus security and filling them in. They assured him that they would alert their officers and advised him not to worry. These kids did this all the time.

"These kids" Dean thought bitterly at hearing that. "These kids" maybe, but not Sam. He wanted to scream, to vent the frustration. This was Sam. Sam did not do this, not "all the time", not ever. Why didn't anybody understand that? It all had to go somewhere so he banged his fist down onto the desk. Papers and pens jumped on the surface from the impact.

"Feel better?" John asked.

"Not even a little," Dean grumbled, shaking the pain out of his hand.

"Dean, try to relax. We know Sam's not in any local hospital or drunk tank. That's good news. If he shows up at one, they all have our contact information. The most likely thing right now is, he's doing some excessive celebrating. Brady will have him call when he gets in, and when he does, you can feel free to tear him a new one. It'll be good practice for Little John because this never ends. It just passes to the next in line."

Dean wasn't having it. "I don't get it, Dad. How can you be so calm?"

"Not my first time at this rodeo, Son."

"No, I guess not." Dean silently resolved that it would never happen because of him again. Until now, he had never really fully considered the fallout from his own days-long party excursions. "Oh man," he moaned as another thought pushed into his mind, "Mom is going to freak."

"No, she won't." John countered as he headed towards the door back to the work floor.

"Dad, have you met Mom? What do you plan on telling her?"

"The same thing I always told her when it was you, nothing until I know something for sure. There's no reason for her to have to worry over nothing." He paused at the door, waiting for Dean to follow. "All we can do now is wait, and we've left Guenther covering the floor all alone for long enough. We're already way behind for the day, so throw yourself into it. It'll keep your mind off Sam until he calls."

John figured that it was probably for the best that he couldn't make out whatever it was that Dean mumbled as he passed by on his way out of the office. He followed Dean out, thinking that he had a few choice things to say to Sam when he called.