As the four wanderers approached the oncoming city, Knives became quieter and quieter, letting the others ramble about what they wished. Soon he was an odd few feels behind the others and his eyes watching his feet as they moved.

Milly was the next one to become quiet as she slowed in order to meet up with Knives. "Why are you so quiet?"

Knives was snapped out of his daze by the innocent voice of the tall brunette. "I'm just not interested in rambling on about such things as what kind of napkins to lay on a table."

Milly eyed him strangely before saying, "You're hiding something."

"You don't know me that well."

"It's not just you she can read." Vash interrupted. "She can see through anyone like that." He laughed. "In a way Big-girl there is a genius."

Knives smirked at the thought. Milly? A genius? Yeah. Right. "I'm not hiding."

Milly knew he was lying, but decided it best if she got what ever he concealed out when they weren't around Meryl and Vash. She sped up a bit in order to catch back up to the two in front.

As the three chattered on, Knives went back to his almost vegetative state as he emptied his mind as a way to calm himself. However a thought remained in his mind. We're getting closer.

One year ago

Midvalley stood outside the small building, looking down at the children around him. "Yes yes, I will play a song for you all. I promise." He chuckled. Stopping, he heard Legato's voice in his mind. It's time."Right." He told himself, setting the black case he was carrying down on the ground.

Slowly the tall man pulled a instrument of a golden color out. Taking two other pieces out he put it all together, then pulled a strap around his neck and snapped it onto his saxophone. "I'm sorry about this Sylvia." Midvalley petted the brass object along it's neck. "I shouldn't have to use you like this."

Midvalley cleared his throat, closing his eyes and remembering why he tried to run away months ago. With a shallow laugh he looked down at the children. "I'll race you all inside."

The children all laughed running into the church expecting the musician to follow behind. "I'm sorry kids." Putting the mouthpiece to his lips he whispered. "But I promised."

As beautifully sad notes escaped his horn he shed a single tear, yet knew that if he didn't carry through, he would be added to the children as the church fell. So as the notes became louder and louder, the walls began to crumble. Damn it. Men are one thing…but why children, Legato?Wanting his job completed, he let out a squeal in his saxophone, biting down on the reed and letting the building finally fall, and the children rest.

If there is anything I regret in my days of being in the Gung-Ho Guns. It's today. As quietly as he came, he turned, putting his saxophone away again, and strolled back into the desert.

Knives looked at the large town of December in horror, knowing soon, Milly would want to see what her first love left behind, but only see rubble.

"I wonder what town this is." Vash wondered to himself, looking at the tall buildings and nice cars.

Meryl smiled. "It's December." She laughed. "Bernardelli is here."

"Really!" Vash looked at her in shock. "So…oh crap…I'm a wanted man!" He ran frantically around the other three visitors flailing his arms in the air.

Meryl finally stopped her groom by punching him in the face as he ran by her. "If you don't act obvious, they won't know. You don't have your normal red coat, which is what you're known for, remember?"

Milly laughed as Vash muttered and "oh yeah" and jumped up, giving Meryl a peck on the cheek, calling her a genius. "You're funny Mr. Vash."

Vash and Meryl both turned to Milly quickly. "Shh!"

Vash grinned. "My name is Ericks. I don't know what you're talking about."

Milly chuckled once again. A thought then struck her. "Wait a second. If you can't reveal who you are, how are you two going to get married feebly."

"Legally, you mean." Knives corrected.

"Yeah."

Meryl was silent for a second before opening her mouth to speak…then closing it back. "I don't know." She whispered.

"It doesn't matter." Vash took her hand, kissing it lightly. "Laws are for dummies anyways." Looking at her he said. "We can still have a service."

"Ugh. You two are disgusting." Knives groaned. "Can we please find a hotel before you two start fornicating?"

Meryl and Vash both blushed, mumbling "Right…hotel…"

Meryl walked through the grocery store slowly, Milly muttering behind her. What Knives had said earlier was bothering her. Not that he mentioned sex, but at the fact that…did she really know when she would ever want to go that far with Vash? Sure she'd considered it, but since…that time…she'd always thought it would be like that. Men being beasts, the pain, the tears…and she didn't want that.

She knew that the pain would be like that this time, but still…would Vash become beastly? No. Vash isn't anything like that monster was. He's different. I don't know what I'm afraid of. She admitted.

He's going to want it sooner or later. She then realized what she needed to do. She needed to talk to someone.

Vash fell asleep soon after he ate his dinner. Same for Milly. Knowing this, Meryl knocked on the hotel door. "Knives?"

The silver haired man opened the door, scratching his head. "Woman, what do you want?"

Meryl sighed, realizing that she had made a former homicidal maniac her confidant. "I need someone to talk to." She whispered.

Knives was surprised but knew that it had to be about something important. Could she know? "Come in."

Meryl helped herself to Knives' coffee, and sat down at the table. "I know this is weird, but Milly wouldn't know about it, and Vash is part of the topic so I couldn't talk to either of them."

Knives was slightly relieved that the subject wasn't on what Midvalley had done. "What is it then?" He got ready for the weeping story that was to come.

"What am I afraid of?"

Knives waited for the rest of the question, but when no more came he asked. "What are you talking about?"

Meryl sighed, not wanting to talk about it, but knew she had to get some help. "I'm afraid of going any…further…with Vash." She coughed out. "But why?"

Knives was shocked. "How the hell am I supposed to know!"

"Damn it. I should have known you would have been so stupid about this subject."

Knives knew she was serious. "Okay. Talk." Shaking his head he thought to himself. Why have you done this to me Vash?

Minutes later Meryl had finally finished her confession. "I don't know why I'm so scared. I know that Vash isn't like Howard, and I'm not going to be hurt physically or emotionally. But I'm just scared."

Knives sighed. "Well it's expected for you to be afraid. After such a painful experience during your preteen years one would know that you would fear such an act. You haven't seen what else there is."

Meryl blushed. "But how do I get over it?"

"To say the truth," Knives started, "The only thing you can do is try it with Vash. With a fear like that you can't overcome it unless you try it."

Sighing, Meryl nodded. "So I'm just going to have to gather up some courage and go through with it."

Standing up, she told him. "Thanks for your help. I'm sorry I bothered you Mr. Knives."

She turned to the door before being stopped. "Oh and Woman." She looked back at Knives. "Confess to your friend what you've been hiding. She probably wants to know why you get so upset."

Meryl was shocked that he noticed when she was sad. But nodded despite her awe. "I will."