DISCLAIMER: The Matrix Characters and the Universe are not mine.

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MATRIX 4: RESURRECTION - by -yannik-

MANY QUESTIONS

>>

Did she have questions? Of course she did! Lots of them. So many, she couldn't decide which to ask first. Which was the most important.

She looked around.

"Where are we?"

"This is the virtual reality in which your mind may abide until your body is healed" Phoebe smiled.

"My body..." Trinity looked down, at her stomach. Touched it involuntary. "I was hurt..." she remembered.

"Yes you were. Your body sustained much damage..." the nurse hesitated, then corrected herself. "Many wounds. We are healing it."

This statement made it obvious for Trinity, that Phoebe was not human. She couldn't decide whether she was frightened by that, or not. Then her sight once more caught the still figure of Neo.

"And him?" she whispered not daring to disturb his peaceful sleep, perhaps afraid she might break him.

Phoebe remained silent for a few, evenly counted seconds. With a purposeful move she touched his wrist. There wasn't anything unnecessary in her actions. Then she spoke.

"We are trying to cure his mind, but this is more difficult."

"His mind? What happened?"

"He fought with a virus program called Smith, and it caused much... how would you call it? Post traumatic stress, and retreat. We cannot reach him."

Trinity tried to grasp all the information, but it was tough. It didn't sit well with so many gaps in her memory. What were actual memories? What was her imagination, or…

"When would he wake up? Would he?..." she finally asked, surprised she spoke the questions aloud.

"We don't know that" Phoebe answered courteously. "But we'll keep on trying. We are patient."

Trinity waited a moment. Nurse's calmness, niceness was disturbing in a strange way. It was obvious that she honestly tried to be as reassuring to the patient – that Trinity now was – as possible. And with all the knowledge Phoebe must have had concerning humans, all her actions were well justified. But Trinity knew better. She knew this was a program, this was a VR, this was all a lie.

"Patient" she repeated, looking the fake woman straight into her fake blue eyes, expressing sincere sensitivity. "You can afford it, can't you? You're machines? Programs?"

"We are. I am a program, and machines are working in the real world, trying to heal you both."

In the real world. Her body was somewhere in the real world. She longed for it.

"Could I..." she hesitated, as sudden emotion choked her. "Get out there? Go to the real world?"

"Preferably not now" Phoebe answered with her unwavering polite smile. "Your body might cause you much pain. As soon as you get better, you might be in the real world whenever you want to."

"And then... could I go back to Zion?"

"Certainly – if you choose to."

Zion. Morpheus. Home. Her home was with Neo. Phoebe said they were patient, but her… How long would she have to wait for him?

"Is there anything else you'd like to know?" Phoebe asked, after waiting appropriately long moment.

Oh, yes. She wanted to know so much! So much…

"Could I stay alone?..." she asked instead. "With him." She never let go of the sight of his face. So calm.

"Of course" Phoebe smiled. "If you need anything from me, just call."

She turned around and left. If Trinity had any doubts whatsoever, about this woman… this representation of a woman… Now she was sure. There weren't slightest glimpse of real human emotions in Phoebe. No compassion. It was just a program that tried to pretend!

Tried. This program tried.

Trinity gasped in bare surprise. Why? Why would she try? What did they want? Why would they try to make her feel comfortable?

She vaguely remembered that she and Neo went to Zion to end the war. He had an idea how to do this, but he didn't tell. Did that really happen? She also remembered seeing the sun. She remembered him hurt so badly. His eyes… They seemed undamaged, but then – this wasn't true. She stroked his skin with the tips of her fingers, tears welling. She wouldn't cry! – she wiped her face quickly.

Remember… What else did she remember?…

She remembered dying!

She not only was hurt, she was dying. As the memory of the pain, of the fear and emptiness engulfed her, she collapsed to the floor, crying and clutching her virtual stomach. And sobbing like she'd been a long, long time ago, back in the Matrix, when she'd still thought it had been real.

When she was a little child.

>>

The time was passing. Slowly. The pains coming through from the real world – as Phoebe explained the phenomenon – weren't disturbing Trinity anymore. It was hard to tell whether days here were twenty four hours long, but Trinity had to assume, that the Machines wanted to make her environment as realistic as possible. And if the length of the day was lifelike, then she had spent over three weeks in this room.

She quickly understood, she was not in the Matrix, and Phoebe confirmed. They had never had humans in Zero One before, and they created this room in a rush. That's why it was so uncongenial.

Trinity needed to make it different, not knowing how long she would reside here. And not even knowing how to create a congenial environment. So she asked for a window first. And thus she had to choose the view outside of it. She asked for green, blossoming hills, with enchanting sunsets, and downings.

Later on she furnished the room. She wanted the carpet, and there it was – soft, fury, warm. And pink. With purple irregular insertions. Where it didn't cover the floor, wooden battens were visible.

She wanted her bed not to be so hospital-like, so it was changed into a wooden one with carved head, with large soft pillow, feather quilt, and a soft blanket.

She was bored, so she asked for… a library, and a rocking chair beside it. And a shaded lamp, that gave soft, warm light. Similar one was hanging form the smooth ceiling, cozying to room. Even the walls had this soft, creamy color now. In the library there were books raging from Jack London's to Joice Carol Oates'. Were these book really written by humans in the ancient times, before the Machines took over? They must have been. There were emotions in them, and reading made Trinity calmer, more at peace with herself and the situation, than ever before.

She closed the book, and looked over at the only thing in the room that wasn't changed. Neo's bed. And he himself. The Machines apparently expected him to wake up quickly. Trinity was unconscious for a couple of days after all. But he slept, and slept… and slept…

Trinity rose, and neared him. She sat beside his bed, and took his hand into hers like so many times before. Countless times. She stroke a lone strand of hair off of his face. Neo.

"Neo" she whispered, hoping he would finally hear her. But there was no response. None at all, like so many times before. Countless times. "You have to wake up. Please, wake up finally. I can't do that anymore. I can't sit here!… Look at me!" She looked. Long, ethereal dress of salmon color. Long dark braid. This wasn't her! "What am I doing?"

What was she doing indeed? She looked at the room again, as if seeing it for the first time. It was changing little by little, and she didn't realize when it became… That! What would Neo think of her if he saw it?

Oh, she was lonely. She needed something, that would make her feel at home, and she thought of this childhood dream. This was her childhood dream, when her own childhood became unbearable. A room with hills overview, and lots of books. With old style lamp, rocking chair, quilted bed. But then she grew up, and once she started searching for the Truth her dreams changed. And once she found the Truth, it turned out to be as different from her long forgotten dreams, as it was ever possible.

But still, once she was left alone and scared, she went straight back to the dream imprinted in her subconsciousness. It made her feel safe. But it just wasn't her.

"Neo." She turned to him again. Looked at his beloved face for a long, long time. "Neo, you have to wake up. We have to go back to Zion. Who knows what they are thinking about us. It's been so long since the war ended. We must go back, and help them to rebuild human civilization. We can't keep sitting here like this, and… and… Just wake up. I love you." She leaned and kissed him lightly on his unmoving lips.

Unmoving, but warm. He was alive.

She got up, and went back to her rocking hair. As she sat down, and held her head in her hands, she whispered something that surprised even her:

"I'm wasting my time here."

>>

She had no idea how long she sat there, trying to comprehend this last statement. Phoebe's arrival woke her up.

The nurse rarely came here uninvited, so Trinity was a bit startled.

"We assume your body is healed enough for you to get out to the real world" the program stated without a welcome, and without a smile.

"That's good" Trinity answered, not really listening, or understanding.

"You should go out and start some muscle training, before you leave for Zion."

Trinity blinked.

"Leave for Zion?" she was confused. Suddenly elated, and reluctant at the same time. Leave for Zion. But… "What about..." her gaze wandered off to Neo, who still didn't wake up.

Phoebe didn't follow her train of thoughts.

"You must prepare yourself" she explained coldly. "You've spent here a few weeks, and your body is weak. You must strengthen your muscles. Zero-One is not prepared as human habitation, but we made what we thought necessary for you to exercise. We'll stay in touch with you through the console, where your body is resting now. We expect you to rest, and spend nights here, but you may choose otherways."

With that Phoebe, the room, Neo, his bed… it all disappeared…

>>

…and Trinity found herself lying on a rough metal floor, under a mess of multisized pipes, bars, wands, sticks. The familiar dizziness told her that jack connecting her with the VR had just unplugged itself. Or her, whatever the perspective was.

She took her time, before she decided she could get up. Red and golden lights were flashing all around, she listened carefully to some unfamiliar noises. Finally she sat up, and felt dizzy again. Oh, she was weak! Her abdomen was hurting, but wounds were covered with relatively clean sheets of some material. She stank with sweat, old blood, suppur, and some machine made medicaments.

When vertigo passed, she carefully looked around.

And her heart broke into pieces.

Forgetting about all the pain she jumped up, nearly collapsed when another wave of weakness hit her, but defeated it with all her might, and strode to his side.

"Neo…" she whispered with despair.

Neo. He was lying there on a similar rough metal bed, made partly of flexible pipes and tubes. He smelled as foully as she did. His cloths were shabby and filthy. And his face…

…his eyes…

…were still covered with the bandage Trinity had made back then… when Smith burned him. His eyes were not healed. His eyes were not even taken care of! They did nothing!

"You shitless, fricked up!…" Trinity wanted to curse and swear, but she choke. She couldn't find words.

She wanted to hold him, to tell him everything would be alright, nonetheless. But he wouldn't hear her.

So she could only lash out on the one person she could hold responsible.

She returned to Phoebe.

>>

"You're back quickly."

Trinity nearly jumped at the woman.

"You said you cured him! His body. But he's still blind!"

"I didn't say that" Phoebe answered patiently. "We are searching for a cure for that as well, but trying to call him out of coma has higher priority for us. We were unable to cure his eyes. We know little about your human fragile bodies. It was hard enough for us to heal you, but we found some data in the Matrix. We cannot find any advice about Neo however – both his eyes and his mind."

Phoebe's composure was like a cold water for Trinity. Her rage was gone. Only dull emptiness remained.

"So what are you going to do?"

"Keep on searching."

"For how long?"

"As long as it takes."

Emptiness. As long as it takes. How long would it take?

"You're healed" Phoebe repeated. "And as I said before - you need to exercise. The Logos is repaired also, and ready to take you to Zion."

"Without Neo?"

"We need you to go to Zion, and then enter the Matrix to tell us what is happening there."

Trinity looked into the continually calm blue eyes of Phoebe. She tried to comprehend what the latter just said. There was something not right with this request.

"You mean you don't know?" she gasped.

"Nobody from Zion entered the Matrix since the end of the war" Phoebe explained. "We need to know why."

"Because you killed them all!" It was so obvious for Trinity. What was that? Was the war over or not? Or was it over too late? What did Neo do? She knew only what Phoebe told her, but how could she be sure the foul program wasn't lying? The rage was right back there, and Trinity clenched her fists, set her teeth.

But Phoebe's features were as always – concealed.

"No we didn't" the program explained without anger or hurt. "Most survived. Now, do you have any other questions, or may I release you into the real world?"

Trinity boiled inside, but – truth be told – she was helpless. She wanted… she only wanted…

"Change this…" she said waving her hand, showing the surroundings, but even before she finished the sentence, Phoebe – without snapping her fingers, or any other gesture that would justify the magicality of all this – changed the room into this white unpleasant place once more. With gridded ceiling, and white ceramic cold floor. Without a single window.

"Anything else?"

"It seems I have no choice."

"Not anymore."

>>

She exercised. She run, she did push-ups, knee bendings, bends of all kind. Slowly, easily at first, but her well trained body was regaining it's strength at a quick rate. The Machines really built something, that could – with a little bit of generosity – resemble a gym.

Days were passing again, faster now, that she was occupied. And it was obvious that the Machines weren't going to let her stay here much longer.

But Neo still didn't wake up.

She didn't spend the nights in the virtual world. She lay on the bumpy bed, and fell asleep before her head touched the rags that were her pillow. Did she prefer those rags, over the soft, feather cushion she created back there? – she wondered. The answer was simple – yes, she did. Because, even though her senses didn't feel the difference, this was real, and that was not.

She preferred staying here for one more reason – Neo. This was the real Neo, and throughout those weeks she spent in there with his virtual representation, she had no idea of his true condition. Back there he was simply sleeping, but here she saw better. This was the real him, and she needed to remember that.

So often she stood beside him, when she needed some rest after the exercises, or when some small machine brought her the foul gruel, so much like the one they ate back in Zion. She stood beside his bed, and just watched his peaceful face. No, not face. Lips, cheeks, nose… it wasn't face. It wasn't whole. And although she assumed Phoebe was right, and whatever became of his eyes meant nothing as long as he was unconscious, this sight pained her the most. Because it demonstrated how badly injured he was.

So often she wanted to touch him, hold him, but she was scared. She didn't want to learn how adequately the word "lifeless" described him. How cold his skin might be. If there was any heartbeat. She wasn't sure if he was breathing. His chest seemed to move, but it was slow, shallow. Some machine invention rested beside his lips and nose, maybe it gave him oxygen? – so she couldn't even feel for the currents of inhaled and exhaled air. Besides she didn't want to. What if there weren't any?

She was irrational!

She was lonely for too long.

But she didn't want to leave. Without him.

It took her a few days, before she finally allowed her fingers to rest upon his skin. His warm skin, on this mysterious spot, between his neck and his shoulder. Where he loved to be kissed. She felt her body getting stronger with each passing hour, and she knew the Machines wouldn't let her stay, if she was ready to go. Go in search of the unknown. She dismissed the disturbing thought. She stroked his neck, his cheek, and finally, overcoming her fears and prejudices, leaned down to lightly kiss him.

"Neo. You have to wake up" she pleaded. "We don't have much time left."

And this time Neo responded.

>>

t.b.c.

A/N: Please, if you're more familiar with Matrix cannon – and I'm sure many of you are – tell me if I'm making any mistakes in naming things and procedures. I promise to make changes even in this chapter, and be as cannon instructs in the next ones for sure. You know – the plug in thingie may be wrongly described in this chapter… Thanks for any help.

-yannik-