Chapter 11 - The rattle of tracks
13th April, Sensha-do Practice Grounds, 15:25
The Cromwell appeared with Honeybush's head clearly visible from the driver's porthole. She parked the tank and bounced out in a seemingly bubbly mood.
"Are you doing the fire test?" she asked, slapping her hand on Sarah's arm. Sarah nodded in turn."Nothing that you can't do English, and anyway nice purple nails! It goes with your coat," Honeybush said, smiling as she walked away.
Sarah was not too sure if Honeybush was being sincere or not. She shook it off and took a deep breath and climbed up onto the Cromwell taking her time with every step making sure not to stumble on the rather slippery metal. She got into the turret and sat inside of her Cromwell. The smell of cordite, sweat and oil made it feel like home. With the commander's hatch open above her she peeked her head out as she looked out waiting for Orange Pekoe to arrive which she promptly did.
"Okay English, are you ready?!" Orange Pekoe shouted towards her a whistle and phone in hand.
Sarah gave the thumbs up and slid inside closing the hatch with a hard metal thwack. The small rays of sunlight coming through to periscopes and the cream dome of the interior light barely illuminating the inside of the turret. She sat down in the commander's seat making herself comfortable and began to wait for the signal to start the safety test.
"Okay, left hand on handle push up, climb out onto the turret, use the gun barrel as a handrail and off the front of the tank," she murmured the usual exit plan to herself.
Orange Pekoe and Rukuriri were standing several metres away both looking at the olive drab Cromwell with its white painted pegasus logo on the side of the turret.
"Do you think she will make it in time?" Rukuriri questioned, her arms crossed. Orange Pekoe didn't answer, but blew her whistle and started the stopwatch on her phone with Rukuriri watching contemptuously beside her.
Hearing the dull screech of the whistle, Sarah pushed open the hatch above her. With the sunlight shooting straight in, then pushing herself up out of the commander's hatch of the Cromwell. But as she placed her chunky medical boot on the commander's seat, the lack of feeling in her foot and the poor grip from the boot caused her injured left leg to slide out from under her. She slipped, falling back into the tank, bashing her forehead on the brim of the commander's hatch and crashing with a hard thud onto the gunner's seat, with her head resting on the commanders seat.
"No, I can't give up, not now, no!" she screeched out loud. She pushed herself up, wiping off sweat from her forehead. This time she took a firm grip with her strapped up foot, making sure to place it dead centre of the commander's seat. She climbed out and using first the turret as a guide and then holding onto the gun, she climbed down the front of the tank in all about 30 seconds.
"English, are you OK?!" Orange Pekoe shouted, running over to her.
"Yes I'm fine" she replied wiping more sweat off her forehead. Sarah looked down to her hand thinking she saw something off, it was no warm transparent sweat, but dark red blood and her head really began to hurt as the adrenaline ran thin. The pain was soon accompanied by dizziness as she rubbed her eyes frantically with her dripping red hands trying desperately to keep the blood out of her squinting eyes. She slowly wobbled her way towards the pair of girls coming towards her. Suddenly a dark haze seemed to roll over her eyes, the last thing she saw was Orange Pekoe and Rukuriri running over to her as she toppled over in a faint, falling hard onto her side, just before the two could catch her.
13th April, Darjeelings apartment, 22:20
Sarah had been discharged from hospital yet again, with yet another injury this school year, which must have been a St. Gloriana record by now. With a plaster over her forehead, the doctor explained to Sarah that she was suffering from a mild concussion. Darjeeling as per usual picked her up and now they were both back in her apartment.
Sarah was sitting at one end of the sofa. "I was doing so well..." she said in a light daze to Darjeeling who sat on the other end as she tried her best to study.
"Yep" Darjeeling replied rather disinterested as she sat at the other end of the sofa, not looking over to Sarah at all but kept her eyes glugged to her notes.
Sarah continued, "And my darn boot."
"I know you have told me now eight times!" Darjeeling said back, sounding rather calm but annoyed at the same time.
"Have I? I'm so confused," Sarah said as she rubbed her head. taking a few moments to gather herself. "I was..."
Darjeeling threw her papers all over the floor "I've had enough!" Darjeeling yelled at her. "Your boot I know! I know! Why can't you do anything without hurting yourself?!" Darjeeling stood up and pointed right at Sarah "I've had it! Next time you injure yourself again. I'm not picking you up from the hospital. You can stay there for all I care. Go to bed! Now!"
Sarah just looked at her and rubbed her head. Everything seemed so difficult; it was like being sleepy and drunk with a hint of room spin. She stood up without any emotion and did as commanded and wandered into the bedroom.
15th April, The Tea Garden, Main Sensha-do Room, 16:54
Sarah still had a sticking plaster on her forehead but she felt a lot better. Her concentration levels were better but the headaches and dizziness still persisted. However, instead of staying at the flat and recuperating, she was heading towards the main office of the Sensha-do team because Rukuriri had requested her presence via a text. Even before reaching the door, she could hear the rather too common, especially when both Rukuriri and Orange Pekoe were alone, the sound of an argument busting through the oak door.
"Listen! We need to use it!" came the rather annoyed voice of Rukuriri. Sarah could tell that Rukuriri was worked up, her voice had the lisp which she was normally able to disguise. It didn't always work if she was unable to control her emotions especially when angry, as was now clearly the case.
"As I said, no! Who has trained on it?" Orange Pekoe snapped back. Usually, this tone of voice would end the debate, but Rukuriri continued.
"Once English is here she will wholeheartedly agwee with me. We need it if we are going to stand any chance of winning this match against Kuromorimine."
"My answer will still be the same. We don't need to use that thing." This was the best and most optimal time to enter, so Sarah did so, knocking hard on the door first.
"Enter," Orange Pekoe spoke, but had her eyes glued on Rukuriri.
Sarah entered as Orange had instructed, Orange Pekoe was seated behind her desk with Rukuriri standing in front of her, "I was called for?" she answered pretending to be oblivious to anything said prior behind the door.
"Mith English Bweakfast, I'm glad you're here. Pleath inform Mith Orange Pekoe of our chances of winning against Kuwomorimine?" Rukuriri stated with her unfortunate lisp sounding very prominent, pointing to one of Sarah's brown folders as she spoke.
"As it said in my evaluation, Miss Rukuriri. The odds of winning are next to nil. We could get some points on the board but to win outright is highly unlikely," stated Sarah firmly and to the point as she looked between Orange Pekoe's and Rukuriri's glares.
Rukuriri slammed the folder on Orange Pekoe's desk. "So, you're saying we have no chanth then? Ith there anyway of changing thesth oddths?" Rukuriri just turned, not even waiting for an answer from Sarah and just looked down onto Orange Pekoe.
"No, we have hope Miss Rukuriri…" Sarah waited for some snarky responses but nothing was uttered. "… but for changing the odds we would need a complete overhaul. We would need more firepower…"
"What is to thay we don't have that?" Rukuriri cut in, trying but failing to regain some control over her voice in her excited state.
"My tank won't be available until at least the 20th April and the TOG II is out of action... the electric motors …" Sarah said, a little confused.
"What if I thay we have a tank that could be even more effective but Mith Orange Pekoe will not allow us to use it?" Rukuriri spluttered.
Orange Pekoe looked up at Sarah. "Please hear me out before making any comment, Miss English Breakfast…" Sarah placed one arm behind her back squeezing her hand into fist slowly tensing and releasing. 'Does Orange Pekoe want us to win or not?!' Sarah thought to herself.
"… after the awful week long tournament, Kay gifted us a thank you present to Darjeeling as a show of friendship and her outstanding guidance throughout the whole ordeal. Something with British and American ties. A Firefly…"
"What?! Why was I never told this?!" Sarah said in anger and confusion. Orange Pekoe looked up to Sarah's face as a fearsome scowl was sent back Orange Pekoe's way.
"Because, Miss English, the governors of our schools know nothing about it. We have had to hide it away from them otherwise they would scrap it. We can do one of two things; use it and annoy the governors and increase our chances of winning very slightly or we don't use it at all."
This was the final straw. "Miss Orange Pekoe do you want us to win this or not! We need all the heavy-hitting firepower against Kuromorimine that we have got! And to leave it somewhere to... to gather dust or be a massive paperweight?! That's not what these tanks are for! ... I came to St Gloriana to work hard and achieve great things for this school. I put my life on the line for this school. But you want to risk nothing! NOTHING!" Sarah turned and stormed out of the office, the heavy wooden oak doors crashing against the walls, with Rukuriri in hot pursuit after her co-vice.
It wasn't too hard for Rukuriri to catch up to Sarah as she hobbled down the steps.
"English, we normally don't see eye to eye these days, but all I can say is thank you for what you have done today for St Gloriana," Sarah noted Rukuriri's voice was now back under control.
"Why hasn't Darjeeling told me about this? About this Firefly?" she asked, rubbing the plaster on her forehead.
Rukuriri walked Sarah to the bottom of the stairs, then looked around. Seeing nobody around, and with the oak door of Orange Pekoe's office closed, there could be no prying ears or eyes.
"Kay and her boyfriend arrived today at the Ark Royal unannounced. She didn't make arrangements, she just arrived. This doesn't normally happen," Rukuriri said, a little hushed.
"Is she still here? I haven't been able to speak to her for a long time. I didn't even get the chance to speak to her at the ball," Sarah replied.
"She's gone; she was only here from midday til about three... Please don't take this to heart this is only a rumour…" Sarah nodded looking up at Rukuriri's brown eyes. "... as you must know Darjeeling has had other partners in the past. Some have suggested that Kay may have been one of them," Rukuriri put it bluntly.
"So what if she did or not? I don't care."
"Maybe the tank was a present to her, for other reasons? Maybe as a take me back gift? I hear her and her boyfriend are on rocks at the moment," Rukuriri said with a telling shrug.
Sarah just looked at Rukuriri. Slowly Rukuriri backed off, knowing she had crossed the line.
"Do you think Darjeeling is this shallow? You don't understand her like I do! Get out of my sight. You filthy piece of work. How dare you insult our previous commander! How dare you!" Sarah shouted. Moving past her, she left the building.
15th April, Darjeelings apartment, 21:10
It was one of those evenings. Sarah had done her school work and was mentally exhausted with not only the burden of strategic planning for the next match but with what Rukuriri has said to her, which she really wanted to push that to the back of her mind. To get more comfortable on the sofa, she had decided to lay along the whole length. Her bad leg raised by armrest at the end of the sofa and her laptop resting precariously on her chest.
"You know you don't have to hog it," Darjeeling said, walking into the room from the bedroom wearing her light sky blue silk dressing gown.
"You know I just wanted to keep it warm for you," Sarah added, keeping her eyes on the screen of the laptop.
Darjeeling walked over to sit in the only other chair, which was a rather bland looking wooden chair, which Sarah on occasions used to rest her foot or throw her dirty clothes over. Tonight the chair was dragged over to near Sarah's head which rested on the other end of the sofa on top of the armrest.
"So I had a quirky question," Darjeeling said as she sat next to Sarah. For an outside observer, this would look like a psychological evaluation.
"Yessssss?" Sarah responded, her eyes still glued to the screen, as she slowly began to make letters into words.
"So you know of my sexual preference right?"
Sarah carried onto tapping away on the keyboard. "Yes, you're bisexual. Nothing wrong with that," Sarah said back rather nonchalantly.
"I was thinking..." Darjeeling said as she leaned over closing the laptop so quickly it took Sarah rather by surprise, leaving her in a bit of a daze. "... you said you have never been with a man before?"
Sarah gaze darted over to Darjeeling's face. "Darjeeling? I don't think I've never been attracted to boys. They're too smelly and hairy legs like yuck."
"I mean, you never know unless you try it? As the saying goes 'A person who has never made a mistake never tried anything new'," Darjeeling added getting a little red to her cheeks.
"Ummm thanks for the offer. But no thanks," Sarah said
"Listen. I can find you a nice..."
"No thank you, Darjeeling... I love you and nothing else," Sarah said, taking her hand.
"Okay then. That's fine. No problem. Hopefully, you'll come to bed later. I do get lonely without my Teacup next to me." Darjeeling said as she stood letting go of Sarah's hand and moved off to the bedroom.
Sarah opened her laptop again and continued on writing up her essay. 'Why would Darj ask me something like that? Did I do something to annoy her? Am I not any good? What? Is she going to go for a boy over me?' her head shouted at her.
"For fuck sake Sarah just get it together," she whispered to herself. "Darjeeling wouldn't leave you, just because she's a little horny ... geeze!"
After a while Sarah hobbled her way back into the bedroom. The window on the other side of the room allowed a small ray of moonlight falling onto the peacefully slumbering Darjeeling, but as per usual she was taking up all of the covers onto her side of the king size bed. Sarah walked in and sat on her side of the bed, making the odd glance up towards the full length Darjeeling pillow resting upright against the cupboard, with its seductive look giving Sarah rather a weird vibe. She opened her bedside cabinet to take a painkiller. She looked down at her tablet, but something caught her eye. A small dark blue strap poking out from under the bed. She pulled it out and picked it up. It was a bra but from a bikini; one cup having red and white stripes the other dark blue with stars. Sarah just threw the bra underneath the bed again.
'I've never looked under the bed before, maybe it was always there…' she thought to herself, looking over to Darjeeling who was still facing the other way. 'She wouldn't cheat on me… she wouldn't. I won't tell her I found this.'
Sarah just shook her head and slipped her body under the covers of the bed, lightly placing her arm on Darjeeling's waist.
The pitch black of the nothingness relented, replaced by the sound of light panels ticked as they powered up with the mellow sound of electricity buzzing through the cream white light as it began to pour from them. Of a familiar white panelled ceiling.
Sarah looked up from her bed she lay in and counted the panels. "27 ... No, not here. Please not here," She looked across and onto the floor, the slowly expanding red puddle, and a chess board strewn all across the floor. The source of the blood was a young man in his black blazer, lying face up. She rushed out of the bed sliding on her knees as she cradled his head. "James you're going to be fine," she blubbered towards him, her tears falling and mixing with the blood on the floor.
"I'm going to die here aren't I?" he said whizzing in a tone she never heard from James before, of him sounding scared.
"No you won't, not if I can do anything about it!" She said as she reached for his wound in the center of his chest, but her hand collided with something solid, she looked up to her hand but nothing was blocking it, she pushed forward again but her hand just seemed to hit a glass wall. "James I can't reach your wound, something is blocking my hand." she said as she started punching this invisible wall, hoping she could break through.
"Sarah ..." he took an uneasy breath. "... tell me about mum"
She looked down at his face, as a small tear rolled down his face either from hers or his it did matter. "She was an amazing person, the great mum. Dad loved her to bits..."
"How did she die?"
"Well um..."
"Sarah, how did she die. I want to know, please let me know," he begged her, his voice becoming more and more strained with every word.
"She... she died suddenly. Dad didn't tell me how but she was going to have a baby, we would have had a baby brother," she said. James just closed his eyes and nodded just a little. "I know it hurts, Dad knew it hurts which is why he keeps it away from us. Don't be mad at him."
"I won't. I could never"
"But I don't want to have a child, James. I want a family but I scared James I don't want what would happen to mum to happen to me"
"Would Darjeeling be the mother then?"
"How do you..."
Like what Darjeeling would do, he put his finger on Sarah's lips to stop her talking. "Whenever I mentioned your name to her, her face would always seem to smile, there had to be something there between you two," his breathing increased, with his mouth making a last gulp of air. "I'm going Sarah, I'll see you in the future... Just remember this wasn't the way I wanted to go… maybe ten beautiful women ... by my side... on a sunny beach..."
The bad joke turned the rather bleak tone of the whole conversation. Sarah even smiled, as she still sniffed and cried at the same time. "No don't go"
"But Sarah you'll be like mum, a great person and an even better mother..." His chest lowered and his grey eyes closed. Sarah just froze and hugged his head and slowly rocked forward and backwards not knowing what to do.
"I was supposed to die, James, not you!" she cried as she continued to hold his head stroking his hair. The pressure of something solid and cold was placed on the back of her skull. She knew what it was before she looked down at the blood reflecting the doctor in his white lab coat and beside him the young girl. In his outstretched arm his handgun; his face covered with a devilish smile across his face.
"Look at her! She said she lost her brother!" the girl said with a cackling voice.
"Don't worry Miss Alexander. You will be joining him." He pulled the trigger.
23rd April, Darjeeling's Apartment, 04:13
Sarah shot up from her bed, sweat coursing down her face; her heart racing and her knee throbbing.
"Sarah are you okay?" came a sleepy voice in the darkness next to her.
"Just a... nothing, nothing. Knee pains," she said as she slowly laid back down, catching her breath. Darjeeling put her hand across Sarah's waist, making Sarah relax just that little more. She closed her eyes just waiting for the next nightmare to begin.
Later on, a grateful sun rose again, its warm glow landing softly onto Sarah's sleep deprived eyelids. She just rolled over, covering her face with her pillow, longing to return back to the darkness. A warm hand ran up and down along Sarah's back the light touch of skin on skin pressing down.
"You can't sleep all day Sarah; you need to do work today, the big match is tomorrow," said the voice. Sarah just refused to answer Darjeeling's call to action.
"You have to do your maths and chemistry homework to be doing," Darjeeling said, rubbing her back with a little more force to get her up, but again no response, even though this usually did the trick. "Is there something wrong?" she asked.
"I just need five minutes please... alone" Sarah said. Darjeeling could hear she was upset, so she walked out of the bedroom and picked up her phone to contact the school.
"This is Darjeeling. I'm not feeling too good today; headaches and feeling nauseous. It's best if I stay away from the other students, I wouldn't want others catching this bug." The phone chattered away and the call was ended.
Darjeeling just made her way to the living room and sat rather dumbfounded about this whole ordeal. About half an hour later and hobbling, Sarah made her way towards the living room, her face sore and her eyes inflamed by the large amount of tears they had made. Darjeeling noticed this and stood up from the sofa but really didn't know what to do. Go for a hug, kiss, say something? But she did neither of the options and just looked up at Sarah, who glided past her as if Darjeeling wasn't there.
Sarah walked up to the mantelpiece where a small white and gold china jar rested. "J...James I wanted to s...say h...hap...py twenty first bir...thday," she muttered, crying as she did.
Darjeeling finally knew what to do. She glided over to Sarah and held her hand, hoping this would have some effect but again it did nothing.
"It was my fault... if I just left Maho, if I didn't come to St Gloriana. If I didn't start Tankery. You would still be alive," she sobbed.
"Sarah, what are you saying?" Darjeeling asked, trying to make her see sense. "James would always have wanted you to do well... you've done everything and more, he would be so, so proud of you. Who would have saved Maho?"
Sarah turned to face Darjeeling. "My crew saved her, not me! Rosehip got the message out, not me! And he took the bullet that was meant for me, I can't describe the guilt I feel; I was the one who murdered him. I had my brother murdered!" Sarah screamed at Darjeeling.
Darjeeling wrapped her arms about Sarah and just hugged her. "You mean so much to me, if James was here - which he is."
She parted Sarah's hair, to look at Sarah's bloodshot eyes. "He would want me to look after you as much as possible. I don't want for you to feel so bad," she said. She looked over to the bedroom. "Listen today I'm having a day off studying so you and I can have some fun."
"But your studies are really important," Sarah stammered.
"Do you know this saying? 'Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.' Okay, you sit down and I'll have something ready for you" She walked into the bedroom as Sarah gradually sat down on her side of the well moulded sofa.
Sarah was just looking rather vaguely in the direction of the pot still with a sore heart, her guilt still innately visible to see. "Tada!" Darjeeling said raising her arms into the air like she had been the lucky winner of a game show prize.
"Darjeeling. Why are you dressed like that..." Sarah said, sighing as she spoke.
"I can't do any work if I'm not in the correct clothing"
"But a maid? It's really not your thing"
Darjeeling looked down at her black and white maid costume, which was more of a cheap Halloween costume than the real thing. "So what would you like? Tea? C...c...coffee? Maybe a full English break..."
"I'm going to stop you right there Darjeeling" Sarah said. Darjeeling just looked down and the happiness of her face was instantly wiped off.
"Assam and Orange Pekoe told me before the last time you cooked..."
"What? What did they say? They said they really enjoyed it" Darjeeling said, rather hurt.
Sarah didn't really know what to do; she couldn't throw Assam and Orange Pekoe under the bus, but maybe this was the best time to tell her. "... they said ... it doesn't matter, I'll cook with you."
"Nope you're staying where you are, my little teacup. Maid Darjeeling will cater to your every need."
"Then could I have ..." As she thought drastically of what was easy to make that even Darjeeling couldn't mess up. She looked to the large flat-screen TV and back to Darjeeling's expectant face. "...we will have a movie day then, you pick a film for us till we fall asleep."
"But what about food?"
"We can order in," Sarah suggested.
Darjeeling made a loving smile. "But please let me do something, I know you don't want me too but of all days this day you need my full attention, let me do something... anything. I have it, I'll make you a bacon sandwich, you love them!"
Hearing those words rang extremely large alarm bells in Sarah's head. 'If there is a fire I'm really dead, I can't run, I can't jump. I really don't want to burn alive.'
"Darjeeling that's fi..." but as she said that Darjeeling skipped happily into the kitchen throwing on Sarah's cooking apron.
"You like it nice and crispy don't you, my little teacup?"
"Yeah," she said trying to keep a happy tone, as she planned her escape route when the inevitable fire started. But it was hopeless, there was no way she could, there was only one course of action she could do to save them both. Sarah sighed. "Never in human cooking history has bacon been such a dangerous procedure," she muttered to herself. She leant forward and squeezed both sides of her left knee. The sound of a screaming Sarah would stop any Darjeeling action, which of course it did as she darted out of the kitchen.
"A you okay my little teacup?" Darjeeling yelled running over to Sarah.
"No not really my knee really hurts, could you … um, stay with me, my knee hurts less when you're around," she said making up any excuse to keep her out of the kitchen.
"Of course, anything for you," Darjeeling said, giving Sarah's newly plaster-free forehead a light kiss. She then moved over to the other end of the sofa. Sarah, thinking quickly, pivoted herself resting her head on Darjeeling's thighs.
"You said your knee hurt?" Darjeeling said.
"" Yes. But now my head hurts," Sarah just said back. Darjeeling just shook her head with a light giggle.
"You are just a little devil you know. Do you know of the old fable? The boy who cried wolf?"
Sarah nodded look up towards her face, half being blocked by the protruding white and black cotton chest area of the dress.
"I'm just going to repeat it for you as it seems you need reminding. Once upon a time, there was a shepherd boy who used to take his flock of sheep to the hill to graze on the fresh green grass. Sitting there, he had nothing to do the whole day. One day, an idea struck him. To overcome his boredom, he cried out, 'Wolf! Wolf!' All the men came running with their sticks and to their dismay found no wolf! The boy laughed.
Again after a few days, he cried out, 'Wolf! Wolf!' and the villagers again came running up the hill only to find that the shepherd boy had fooled them. He laughed and laughed, seeing that he had succeeded in fooling them again. However, this time, the villagers were very angry, and they told him that the next time he cries out for help, they would not come.
Next day when his flock of sheep were grazing, he suddenly saw a wolf. He cried out aloud 'Wolf! Wolf!' But alas! No one came to rescue his sheep. The shepherd boy returned home crying only with few of his sheep. The wolf had taken away one of his sheep, and few of his sheep had fled. From that day onwards, he promised never to lie again." Darjeeling finally said ending the story. "The moral of the story is: don't lie. Especially to me." Darjeeling looked down to see her little teacup fully asleep.
"Poor dear," Darjeeling added, stroking her head as Sarah snoozed.