A/N: I would have uploaded sooner, but my account got locked because some bloody bastard reported one of my previous fanfics. I'm a bit worried about posting these authors' note because there's a rumour going around that fanfics are getting deleted because of it. Does anyone know if they've stopped that because I will get extremely pissed off if I loose yet another fanfic. Especially one twenty-nine chapters worth. loner7803/grEMLin eVil: You'll just have to wait and see. fire's ice shield: You actually have a point there and I will actually take this into consideration even though I already have everything mapped out. It's an interesting case, but I may twist it just a little. Lady-Nikki: Thanks a lot. Glad I made you feel hyped. CarmenTakoshi: Aww, but Ian's such a mischievous little prick. You gotta love him too. crisismydaemon: If you live in London, that'll hit the nail on the head and don't criticise yourself, you're a humour writer. I used to good at that genre, but I can't seem to get back into the swing of things. PS. Yeah! I know. LilAngel12558: I know, it's so sad, but I had to twist it up. I just had to. Here's the update anyway. Kit-Kat Caitlin: You have no idea. XD xCrAzYxGuRlx: Really? I though Kai was just a tad bit OOC, but then no one can remain completely "cool" no matter who they are. Even Bryan lost it somewhere or other. And yes, Johnny got it. Poor, delusional Scottish sod. I still like him though. And again, yes, evilness makes the world go round. XD
Chapter Twenty-Nine
What have I done?
I've never lost it like that before.
Never.
Not even in my grandfather's company before he died.
Or maybe I did.
Am I destined to hurt everyone, I've ever cared for?
Or are they destined to hurt me?
Kai Hiwatari was sat in the jail cell known as the segregation unit. The room was extremely bland. The floors were grey. The walls were grey. Even the bars on the window high up were that same foggy texture. The room held the demeanour of a cloudy day. In the corner stood a toilet and a sink and it in opposite corner, a simple mattress that had long since lost its springiness. Kai was sat on the floor with his back up against the wall. His feet were planted on the floor and his knees were bent where his arms rested. His eyes looked at nothing in particular, but his mind was focused on the previous events.
They had made him wear that tracksuit again. Stripped him of their own second-hand garments as if he had stashed items away inside the pockets. A packet of crisps for later perhaps. But not anymore. They had taken away all his privileges, but Kai didn't care about them. In such a place, he wouldn't really call them privileges. Freedom was a privilege and ever since finding out about Rei, he hadn't wanted it so badly until now.
He kept playing the scene in Rei's dorm over and over again like a broken record, trying to fit the pieces together. Tala's intervention. The things he'd said. Rei's words. His own calm composure. Rei's voice as it raised, right up to the point where he'd lost it. And then Johnny. Everything had seemed like a blur after that, but his fists had began to bleed. He could still feel his knuckles connecting with the redheads jaw and the fury he'd felt as he had erupted. Even now, his fist burned as he clenched them. He could only imagine what the Scotsman looked like. But again, it wasn't the highlight of his thoughts. Why had he really lost it? Had it been Tala's words? That satisfying smirk that had played across his lips when he'd revealed everything? Or had it been Rei's words? He'd said he was just like Tala. Just like Ian and Bryan. Vicious. Cruel. Incapable of loving anyone. Was that what he really was?
If he was. He couldn't go back now. He'd been hurt twice and anyway, why would he go back? Rei was a liar. The Chinaman had been playing him all along, which was ironic because Kai had been doing the exact same thing. But instead, he had allowed himself to get wrapped up in the raven-haired character. He had let down his guard, when he knew that it was best to stick to a plan. Best to rule out any emotion. And yet he had fallen. A simple plateau in the original plan. So why did it hurt so much? Why did he refuse to believe that he'd been playing with Rei all along? Because it hadn't been a game. Sure, it had started that way and it was supposed to finish that way. That was how things were supposed to be. He was to succeed and leave the Chinese boy behind. So why had he allowed himself to fall? Why had he become so weak?
Well, never again. As far as Kai Hiwatari was concerned, he'd never let that happen to himself. Ever. He'd never allow such thoughts to contain him any longer. Look what it was doing to him. Tearing him apart. He couldn't make sense of it. He'd always kept cool under pressure. Always. But now it was best to sweep it away. Be done with it. Otherwise, it would consume him and he wouldn't let that happen to him. No way.
He still had a target - an objective. And with no one to hold him back now, he would see it through. His mind would become clear and like the phoenix, he would rise. But where to start. He'd literally ruined all his chances. All his angles were void. He wondered if any of them would talk to him now, not that he cared, but he still needed people if his plan was to succeed.
Lifting his head up, he brought his red hues to the wall before him and scrutinized it, as if a mathematical equation had revealed itself and he was calculating it in his head. He knew what he would have to do. It killed him to even consider such a feat. But if he was to have his freedom, it would need to be done. And as soon as possible.
-
"…And then he's throwing punch after punch after punch and Johnny's just lying there completely defenceless…"
The news of course was everyone's lips again. Most people had witnessed it and for those who hadn't, exaggerated stories were being flung left, right and centre about Kai's sudden outburst. Of course, no one knew the real reason behind it. Most people suspected that Kai had had enough of Johnny, just like most of them had, and had finally given the redhead what he'd deserved. Hardly anyone felt a scrap of sympathy for the Scotsman. His reputation had definitely preceded him. Those who had sympathy for him however, kept quiet, or chatted amongst themselves, while others tried to make real sense of the situation rather than relying on gossip.
"I've never seen Kai so angry before," Oliver had said, surprise in his voice.
Himself, Enrique, Max and Tyson were finishing up in the cafeteria. The blunette was groaning at his now empty plate. He always complained that they never gave them enough.
"Johnny was probably asking for it anyway," Enrique shrugged and leant back into his chair. "You know he's always had a problem with Kai. Jealous, no doubt."
"But for Kai to do that amount of damage?" Oliver pressed. "Something must have provoked him."
Tyson frowned and placed his utensils on his plate. It clattered nosily.
"Kai always acts like he's better then everyone," He stated tediously, placing an elbow on the table and resting his head in his hand. "So who knows? Maybe he just felt like it."
"Get real, Tyson!" The Frenchman said. "Kai's too composed to even consider fighting with someone…"
"…Even if it is someone like Johnny," His lover added on. "The guy was pretty beaten up when I last saw him. He's likely to be on the medical wing for at least a week."
"Needless to say when Johnny gets out, he'll be plotting his revenge,"
"Poor Sap! He's such a glutton for punishment!"
Max, who had remained quiet up until now looked up from his plate and around the room until he clocked on someone familiar. He had been about to wave them over when something grasped his attention that made him recoil. Tyson, who'd noticed the blond's sudden action, followed his gaze.
"Hey, there's Rei and…" His amiable expression fell after that, which caused the entire table to turn around.
Surely, there was Rei himself stood at the cafeteria entrance. He looked very preoccupied even though he was by himself. A hand was rested on his hip and the other kept moving over his right eye. But it was clear for all to see, no matter how many times Rei tried to hide it, because there was an amazing shiner decorating the fringe of his right eye. The bruise was a mixture of black and blue on his beige coloured skin. He noticed them staring immediately and turned away.
"Well…" Oliver finally said. "That explains it."
"Explains what?"
"They had a fight, didn't they?"
"You think so?"
"I know so!" The pretty-boy remarked confidently. "You don't need to see that he's got a black eye to know that. You can see it anyway."
"But Kai wouldn't…
"He beat up Johnny didn't he?"
"It must have been something really bad for them to fall out over," Max sighed.
"Probably even worse then you and Tyson,"
"I'm going to go and talk to him," The blunette said.
He came to a stand and had been just about to leave the table when Rei disappeared from the entrance.
"Maybe you should leave him," Max tugged at his boyfriend's shirt. "He might not be ready to talk."
"All the same, Rei looks awful," Oliver said. "Poor guy. He used to look fruitful. Even when he and Bryan had their disputes."
"Speak of the devil," Enrique nudged and drew their attention towards the entrance again.
Tala, Bryan and Ian had walked in together. The redhead looked particularly smug, which was always bad sign. Bryan looked as blank as usual and Ian was as he was, the same impish look in his eyes. They seemed to lock on immediately with the ones dubbed the flamboyant duo. Tala's eyes, for the most, mirrored that of someone bent of revenge. It sent a shiver up Oliver's spine, but he did not flinch. It was always best to keep calm. Especially when the Russians were concerned.
"Don't let them get to you," The Italian placed a hand on his shoulder comfortingly.
"I won't,"
-
He hadn't a clue what time it was, but when he glimpsed at his wristwatch, he realised that it was twenty-five past eleven. He should have been home an hour ago, but he'd decided to stay behind and do some paperwork. After all, with the amount of prisoners entering his Wing in particular, there was no cause for error. The men upstairs had been so impressed that he had apprehended the drug dealer that they had decided that he wasn't incompetent at all. That he could handle more responsibility. In fact, F Wing had been promoted in the prison hierarchy now. They were no longer at the bottom anymore, which was a bonus, but it also, meant that he'd have to stay there and ascend if he was to keep the Wing from ever returning to the bottom slot.
Robert Jurgen sipped his forth cup of coffee for the evening. Even though he was drinking excessive amounts of caffeine, he could still feel his eyes drooping; calling forth a well-deserved sleep. He had received quite a few hot flushes this evening for some reason. His head felt as if it was levitating off his shoulders and occasionally his eyes glazed over as he looked at the size ten font on each page.
He had had many late nights previously and just when he thought that he could finally go home, several new inmates had been dispatched and Kai Hiwatari – the lifer – had decided to make a spectacle of himself resulting in a trip to the segregation unit. He wasn't surprised really. When he had first set eyes on Hiwatari, he had seen the fire in his eyes. It would only be a matter of time before he unleashed it upon some poor fool; the poor fool in question being Johnny Macgregor; hotheaded extraordinaire. He had papers to fill out on the pair of them.
Another light-headed feeling swept over him again. He'd been getting a lot of those these days and had resorted to taking tablets to reduce the symptoms. He reckoned that a migraine was coming on. He'd probably need to take a holiday and soon.
Pulling out one of his draws, he ruffled about underneath the many papers and pulled out a small brown bottle. It took him slightly longer to realise that it was empty. Just great.
He stood up from his chair and nearly lost his balance, but grabbed onto the handles to support himself. That had never happened before. He reckoned he was simply hungry, failing to remember the last time he'd had something to eat that day. He missed home cooked meals so much, usually being reduced to bringing in sandwiches, but even they failed to suffice these days. The sizes got smaller and smaller. Maybe a glass of water would do the trick.
Straightening his jacket, he exhaled and walked across his office to the exit. Pulling on the door, he was greeted with the silence of the halls and just outside stood a water dispenser. The container was half full. He took a plastic cup and began filling it up with the liquid substance and brought it to his lips on the way back inside his office. Soon, however, that dizzy feeling swept over him again and he stumbled, clasping onto the doorframe. The cup slipped out of his hand and onto the floor and his vision blurred tremendously.
The soft noise of footsteps could be heard along the hall, though they seemed more like distant echoes to Robert. He could have shouted for aid, but Robert, being as proud as he was, thought nothing off of it. It was simply a bad day. He was tired. He ought to go home and rest. Take a day off. But even still, it felt even more than that.
His temperature rose and he tugged on the collar of his shirt to loosen his tie. No matter what he did however, there still felt a tightness around his throat. This time when the vertigo affected him however, it didn't vanish as quickly. He pushed himself to stand, but stumbled again and his legs gave way. The last thing he heard was the rushing of those footsteps. The floor opened arms for him and so did darkness take hold.
TBC