ANOTHER WORLD – I. The Director's World by Betty Bokor
Sam/Daniel. Daniel wakes up in the wrong place.
Spoilers: All seasons, including 9 and 10.
Disclaimer: The Stargate original characters belong to MGM/Showtime, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Film Corp. This was written strictly for the purpose of entertainment. No attempt at copyright infringement has been made.

The Director's World

Chapter 5

The next morning they met Sam and Dr. Lee in his lab. She had informed him of the situation and they were both working on a solution. Vala went to the mess to pick up some breakfast for all of them and Daniel sat quietly watching the scientists discuss the problem. After a short while, Dr. Lee left to gather some more information from the base library.

Sam looked at Daniel and smiled. "You slept with her," she said without losing her smile.

"Wh-what? Well…" he sighed and then gave up. "How did you know?"

"You have the same expression of guilt that Dan used to have. Don't worry; you're not him, you're not betraying anyone, and he wasn't either. I consented to it; I allowed it to happen, and I'm surprised that they decided to stop. I won't tell you that it didn't bother me. It was hard to share Dan, but I had to understand it. I was there with them and he wouldn't have come back if it weren't for her."

"But he chose you," Daniel tried.

"I'll never know exactly why. I've always thought that it was because I got pregnant and because he believes that Vala is stronger and can take it better."

"I think it was because he loves you more," Daniel said seriously.

"Thanks," Sam said and smiled again.

A few minutes later Vala was back and the three of them kept working. It was obvious to Daniel that the two women had become close friends and that they were comfortable working together. He could not see any rivalry between them and he could not see any resentment in Vala because Dan had chosen Sam over her. These were strong women and had been to hell and back together. 'They let Vala and me live because we were Dan's support system and they desperately wanted what he had,' Sam had written in her report, but Daniel knew they had all had a very hard time.

By midday, they decided to take a break and brought food to the lab to improvise a lunch. Sam and Vala quietly talked in one corner of the lab for a minute and then Vala left for a while. When she came back, she brought an envelope and gave it to Sam. They checked the contents and then walked toward Daniel. He was sitting, eating a sandwich, when they both sat by his side.

"This is for you, for when you go back," Sam said. Daniel put his food down, cleaned his hands, and opened the envelope. There were some pictures in it: Jacob hugging Dan on his wedding day; Jack, Kawalski, Ferretti, and Dan before they ever went to Abydos; Landry, Cam, Teal'c, Vala, and Jonas standing in front of the open gate; Dan, Robert, and Sarah dressed for a mission; Vala clearly annoying Teal'c, as she almost hung from his neck; Cam and Carolyn during their engagement party; General Hammond and Janet at Cassie's graduation, and the two pictures he had seen on Dan's desk. "I know they're not as meaningful for you as they are for Dan," Sam added, "but knowing him as much as we do, we thought you'd enjoy having a record of your experience here."

Daniel thanked them and spent a few minutes looking at the pictures. Vala got closer to him and said, "I have one more, but I don't know if I should give it to you." Daniel looked at her confused. "All right; I hope it doesn't hurt." She passed him an old picture of Dan in his doctoral robes with his parents by his side. "Sam said you lost them when you were a child and I know how that feels," Vala added.

Daniel nodded and went back to looking at the pictures. He kept going back to the wedding picture. Sam looked happy in it, but there was something that was not right. He clearly remembered the picture that a Samantha from another reality had brought to the SGC where Sam was marrying Jack. There was a big difference between the two pictures. With Jack, Sam seemed joyful, extremely happy. With Dan, she just looked content. A few hours later, while Vala and Dr. Lee kept trying ideas with the mirror, he accompanied Sam to her quarters so that she could rest. Daniel decided to ask her about the pictures.

"Sam, do you mind if I ask you something very personal?" he said as he helped her sit against the headboard of the bed.

Sam hesitated for a second, then shrugged and nodded. "That's fine."

"Why did you marry Dan? Were you already pregnant? Do you really love him that way?"

"Wow, that's a lot to ask."

"It's okay if you don't want to answer."

"Why do you want to know?"

Daniel sighed and looked down. "The pictures, especially the one of the wedding. You don't look happy. I've seen you look happier-" He stopped; he did not want to bring Jack into the conversation. If that was the reason, he wanted Sam to say it.

"You do know me well, don't you?" Daniel smiled and she did, too. "It's complicated. For years Dan and I were the best friends; we did everything together. There was almost nothing we didn't know of each other, but we never went beyond friendship. When we were with the Ori, I couldn't find a way to help him. Some days he was in so much pain and others, they would heal him, but the memories of the ordeal were still there. I don't know in how many ways or how many times they killed him, only to bring him back. Perhaps they were trying to force him to ascend or to get an Ancient to intervene." Suddenly her eyes got full of tears and Daniel felt guilty.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring back those memories."

"It's the only way for you to understand this," Sam said and took a deep breath. "Every day, they'd bring him back and he'd sit on his cot, against the wall, holding his legs against his body and with his head on his knees. He'd keep quiet and refuse to talk about what had happened. I don't think the Ori ever understood that he wouldn't give in as long as Vala and I were safe. If they had threatened us, he would have done anything to save us." Daniel made a gesture that Sam interpreted as skepticism and she promptly added, "You know it better than I do; don't give me that face." She smiled at him and he smiled back. Sam continued. "Vala thought he needed human contact, you know, someone to show him how important he was for us, but he was very distant and cold. I think he was trying to keep all his emotions under control. So she changed tactics. She started playing with him, taunting him, challenging him, until she got him to respond. She used sex as a means of catharsis, as a way to free him from all the strong emotions that where drowning him. Soon, she pushed me to try, too, and it worked; God knows why, but it worked. In the darkness of the cell, with cold and hunger, keeping it as quiet as possible, every time we got together we defeated all the ghosts and we forgot all the pain. At least for that moment."

"And then?"

"And then we figured out a way to escape. We got help from some of the guards, who were secretly conspiring against the Ori, and we got back. We had been very careful. We didn't want to bring a child into that hell, but as soon as we got here, Janet discovered that I was pregnant. The three of us talked about it and Vala and Dan agreed that he needed to marry me, for the baby and my career, for my name and my reputation, for all those good reasons, but we never talked about love. Don't get me wrong, Dan and I love each other, but while I love him as a man, as my husband, I think he still loves me as his best friend. I sense that he feels drawn to Vala, just as you were as soon as you were alone with her here."

"That's different. I don't have you."

"If your Vala were with you, you probably wouldn't care about that."

"I don't think so. I can't explain to you how many things came together for me to be with Vala last night, but it never happened in my reality and it never will. Sam won't happen either-"

"Why not?"

"Sam doesn't see me as a man, like you said; we're only best friends. Besides, she loves Jack."

"She doesn't!" Sam said emphatically. "She can't have told you that."

Daniel was surprised by her reaction. "Well, she hasn't really told me, but it's clear to see."

"Listen to me, Daniel, she may have an infatuation with Jack, but she'll never love him half as much as she loves you."

Daniel was taken aback by the strength of her conviction, but he knew better. "I don't think so. Just think of the other realities you know where you were with Jack."

"But you weren't a part of my life in those worlds." Daniel shook his head dismissing the idea. "Believe me, Daniel. I once thought that pining for Jack was using the unattainable to avoid being hurt, until I realized that you were who was really beyond my reach. I had you with me every day. I could hug you, cry on your shoulder, have fun with you, but never go any further than that. I taught myself to be happy with that as soon as we brought you back from Abydos, devastated and in pain. For me, you were the embodiment of everything a true scientist could be, someone who proved his crazy theories right, who opened the door to a world beyond what anyone had ever imagined, who had the guts to leave everything behind and try a new life on another planet. I never allowed myself to look at you in any other way, until Vala made me face it all in that cell. She asked me why I let her be the one who comforted Dan when our connection was deeper and had been there for so much longer. I told her that we were just friends and she said I was blind." She sighed. "Now it scares me to death that he'd want to go back to that. You have no idea how much I love you- him" she chuckled and covered her face with her hands.

Daniel stood up and knelt by the side of her bed. He gently held her hands and lowered them to look at her face. "That's why you allowed him to keep seeing Vala, isn't it?"

Sam sighed. "I don't think I have the right to separate them."

"They have ended their relationship."

"I still don't understand it. It's probably because of Dan's sense of morals. I told you; he felt guilty when he was with her, no matter how much he wanted it."

"I can't speak for him, but if he's anything like me, he must feel he owes her for what she meant to him during the imprisonment, but those feelings will never compare to the ones he has for you. You have to talk about this with him. I'm sure it would help both of you. Never doubt he loves you, Sam, and don't think he'll ever be able to go back to a life without you, not of his own will." He raised her hands to his lips and kissed them softly. Then he stood up and said, "I should go back and see if I can help them."

"Wait! Come back for a second, Sam said in a gleeful tone as he turned away from her.

"Are you all right?"

"Yes! Come here, give me your hand." Daniel obeyed her and she put his hand over her belly. "The baby is moving. Can you feel it?"

Daniel felt exhilarated. That was his own child –in some way– alive and moving inside Sam's womb. He smiled broadly. There could not be anything better. Too soon the baby became still and Sam let Daniel's hand go. "Thank you," was the only thing he felt capable of saying.

As he was back walking to the door, the phone rang and he gave it to Sam. "They need us in the lab. Something is going on in the other side of the mirror," Sam said as she hung up. Daniel helped her up and they both rushed to the lab.