Disclaimer: I don't claim to own.
AN: This story is a collaborative effort between, me, Midnight Lily and Steve2. So what you don't like belongs to them, everything else is mine… just kidding.
Chapter 13 Tangled Web
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
Groucho Marx
Sunday morning Alexis and Snape went to join Molly and Arthur Weasley and Aurora and Steven Doff for breakfast. The newlyweds were off for a weeklong honeymoon compliment of the bride's parents.
Molly and Arthur had insisted on keeping the babies last night. Well, actually Molly had insisted and Arthur had just gone along with Molly's wishes. Now Aleser and Nathair were being spoiled by Aurora and Molly.
Alexis wondered wryly if she would get to hold her babies at all this weekend.
Darla came in looking very pretty and surrounded by Weasleys. Ron, Fred and George were paying her a gratifying amount of attention. Charlie had, to her extreme frustration, treated her like a little sister. Percy had not felt he should take time off from work to go gallivanting all over the continent. No one had thought to point out that he could have arrived Saturday and left Sunday and not missed any work.
Harry, Hermione and Ginny came in and settled around the breakfast table. Hermione was shooting death glares at Darla and Ron. Alexis patted her on the shoulder as she went to get her and Snape a cup of coffee. On her way back she paused to whisper in her ear, "Ron is too young for Darla. Darla is more focused on Charlie, simply because he is ignoring her; and Ron is an oblivious prat." Hermione gave her a grateful look. Hermione and Alexis had grown closer ever since the flying lesson: near death experiences tended to have that effect on relationships.
Darien came in yawning and rubbing his eyes sleepily with one hand while holding a truly hideous hat in the other. The hat was puce green with two bats spread out over the brim; one in the front and one in the back, their heads meeting at the crown. The bats were charmed to flap their wings randomly and let out a high-pitched squeak. "Has anyone seen Aunt Bea this morning?" Darien asked around another yawn. "I found her hat in the hallway."
"Did you check her room?" Aurora looked up from feeding Nathair.
"I knocked on her door but no one answered."
"Steven, perhaps you better go check on her, she's not as young as she used to be," Aurora turned to her husband. It was his older sister after all.
Steven nodded and headed out the kitchen taking his coffee with him. A few minutes later he came back holding a piece of parchment and shaking his head. Handing the note to his wife he refilled his coffee cup and sat back down at the magically expanded table.
Aurora read the parchment, shook her head and then read it again before bursting into laughter. When she had calmed sufficiently she explained to the curious on-lookers, "Bea and Marlone Crapse have eloped."
"Is that the bloke she was…" looking at his mum and dad who were blissfully unaware of the debacle that had happened at the reception last night after they left, "…sitting next to?" Fred finished.
"Yes," Steven replied with dancing eyes; everyone was in on the conspiracy to keep Molly at least from finding out the mayhem that her sons' inventions had caused.
"I can't believe I didn't see this coming," Aurora fretted. "I must cleanse my aura as soon as we get home. A blocked aura is nothing to play around with. I really should have seen this in the crystal or tea leaves or something."
"There, there, Aurora, your oldest daughter was getting married. I'm sure all the energy from something so important to you and your family just caused interference in the ether. A good cleansing and you should be back to your normal receptiveness," Alexis consoled.
Darien sat next to Snape; he couldn't believe his luck that no one else had snagged the chair for themselves, "Professor?"
Snape looked over at the young man. He wasn't sure how to deal with him. Snape had never been the focus of hero worship before and it made him uncomfortable. He knew he was as brilliant as Darien thought him, but he just wasn't used to anyone else recognizing and appreciating it.
"Darien, since you were never a student of mine and you are an adult, I believe you may call me Severus," Snape couldn't help but smirk as he noticed all of the stunned looks being directed at him from those who had been his students as well as those who currently were his students.
"Thank you, Severus," Darien positively glowed. He had been fascinated by potions ever since he sister had returned from her first year at Beauxbatons. He had snitched her textbooks as a prank. Only problem was he had gotten locked in the attic where he was hiding them. Out of sheer boredom he had started looking through the books. Nothing really held his interest until he started reading the potion's text. When his mother had finally scried his location four hours later, he was hooked. His parents had finally given into his begging and bought him a beginner's potion kit. They had also magically reinforced his room after the third explosion. He was proud to say that he hadn't exploded anything in over a year now.
When Darien had studied the Wolfsbane Potion, the name Severus Snape had kept reoccurring. Further research had revealed to Darien that Snape was considered one of the top three Potion Masters in Europe. Darien had begged his parents to allow him to attend Hogwarts as soon as he discovered that Snape taught there, but his mother had stood firm on him attending her old school of Beauxbatons.
The current students of Hogwarts School were staring at Darien as if he were some strange new species never before seen. Ron whispered to Harry and Hermione, "He's as bad as Percy is with Crouch."
"At least Snape knows Darien's name," Fred snickered before his attention was claimed again by Darla.
Darien asked, "Severus," blushing slightly at the privilege, "I was wondering if you knew why Cousin Pam's augmentation potion would have reacted like that?"
Snape could feel Alexis' gaze on him, "In what way?" Alexis squeezed his thigh under the table.
Darien looked confused, "Weren't you there when Uncle Erwin pulled her robes off?"
"I may have been, but I must have been distracted by everything else that was going on," Snape replied carefully.
"Whose robes got pulled off and what all was going on?" Molly asked suspiciously.
"Uncle Erwin had too much to drink and started to fall. He tried to break his fall by grabbing Cousin Pam, but unfortunately he grabbed the front of her robes and they ripped under his weight," Alexis hastily explained.
Molly was still giving her brood suspicious looks, "Hmmmm…."
"Molly, look I think Nathair is smiling at you," Alexis turned Molly's attention away from her boys.
Darien looked as if he was about to say something else when he felt a sharp pain in his shin. Looking around the table he tried to figure out just who had kicked him. Snape retrieved his attention, "Darien, what symptoms did Cousin Pam display?"
Alexis leaned over and whispered, "Severus, if you didn't see the woman in nothing but her knickers and a bra with two vastly different sized boobs, one in royal blue and one with green scales, I am taking you to get your eyes examined."
It finally struck Darien that Snape wasn't unobservant, that he was circumspect. It probably wasn't the smartest thing to admit in front of one's wife that he had been looking at another woman. Snape smirked as he responded to Darien, "Whoever made it probably tried to substitute the much cheaper eel blood for the dragon's blood."
"But eel's blood is so unstable, how would they have even added it?" Darien didn't even notice when his mother put a plate of food in front of him.
"If the eel's blood is concentrated and added to rat brains and then passed through a goat's bladder, it forms a gelatinous substance that will remain stable until it melts. If you add it right as it is starting to revert to a liquid state it will mimic dragon's blood in color and texture. However, as you could see the results will vary," Snape pretended not to see the looks of revulsion on many of the faces seated at the table.
"That would explain the difference in size, but why the scales and the color?" Darien was shoveling food into his mouth much like Ron would had he still been eating.
Snape was enjoying the discussion on many levels. Darien was the type of student that Snape actually looked for: intelligent, earnest, and interested. The added bonus was all this talk of blood, brains, and boobs was making the rest of the people present green. "Another popular substitution in the Augmentation Potion is elephant dung for Phoenix tears," Snape expounded. "The dung, of course is in much more plentiful supply and much cheaper than the tears: of course the taste has to be disguised, usually by adding burnt bluebird feathers, which would account for the blue color. Now the scales are much more difficult to explain."
Before Snape could try there was a retching sound and Ron, looking decidedly green said, "Please…"
Darien totally misunderstood and happily began to explain, "Elephant dung has a distinctive taste and odor that would have to be camouflaged in order for the imbiber not to recognize it. Burnt bluebird feathers are a common way to disguise the taste; not that they taste any better. However, because they cause such a strong burnt taste and odor and they are cheap, they are used most…" Darien trailed off watching Ron run from the room with his hand over his mouth. Turning to Snape with a puzzled look, "He left before I could explain why they should have added puréed chicken feet and beaks with gopher guts to leach the color out of the feathers." Darien shrugged at the inconsistency of some people who asked for an explanation and then ran off before it was complete.
Alexis looked over at Snape and Darien, "Severus, why don't you and Darien take this discussion into the other room?" There were many fervent nods of agreement from the slightly green guests seated around the table.
Darien looked around astounded that he was the only one who wanted to take advantage of this opportunity to learn from the master. Shaking his head in disbelief he and Snape headed out of the kitchen.
Fred and George stood up eager to make their escape, before they could leave, Alexis stopped them with a gimlet glare, "Boys, you didn't forget that you promised to help clean up from the reception?"
Correctly reading the warning in her eyes, "Of course not, Alexis, we were just heading that way," Fred smiled winningly.
"Yes, we were just going to gather a few things we might need," George added.
Molly looked at her twins caught somewhere between surprise and suspicion, "Fred, you and George volunteered to help Alexis clean up?"
"It was the least we could do," Fred said polishing an imaginary halo.
"Why the least?" Molly asked leaning slightly toward suspicion.
"To thank her for making sure we were invited and had a way to get here," George interjected.
"I'll meet you in the ballroom in five minutes. Don't make me come looking for you," Alexis warned.
"Yes, Alexis," they chorused.
As the twins walked out, Charlie walked into the kitchen and immediately headed for the coffee. Darla, with careful timing, got out of her seat and managed to let him plow right into her knocking her to the floor. Darla gave him a furious look, "Watch where you are going!" She was furious because her plan hadn't worked. He was supposed to have caught her, leaving her pressed up against him and held in his arms, instead, now she was sitting on the floor desperately wanting to rub her throbbing bottom.
Charlie managed a sheepish grin, "Sorry, didn't see you there," before stepping over her and pouring himself a cup of coffee. Keeping his back turned to her, he allowed a grin to spread over his face.
Fred and George had quickly run back into the kitchen to help the pretty young witch to her feet, taking advantage of the moment to help her brush off her clothes, paying special attention to the back of her robes. "Thank you Fred, George, it is nice to see at least some of the Weasleys know how to treat a lady," Darla flounced out of the room with her nose in the air.
"Charles Weasley! I taught you better than that!" Molly began to scold her son.
Aurora interrupted before Molly could get into full tirade, "Molly, leave the boy alone. He knows exactly what he is doing."
Molly turned to Aurora, "What are you talking about? You can't mean to tell me you approve of how he has been treating your daughter?"
"Darla is used to boys falling all over themselves whenever she crooks a finger. Charlie has caught her attention by ignoring her, or treating her like an annoying younger sister. Now she will be doing everything that she can to attract his attention. She will chase him until he catches her."
Molly looked closely at Charlie, "Just what is your game, young man? She is a nice girl from a good family and I won't have you playing fast and loose with her."
Charlie grinned, "Mum, you have always told us that you knew as soon as you laid eyes on dad that he was the man you were going to marry," Molly nodded slowly. "Well, as soon as I saw Darla, I knew that she was the one. I also knew that the best way to get her attention was to pretend I didn't want it."
"Exactly how did you know this?" Molly asked suspiciously.
"I told him," Aurora said calmly. "As soon as I saw Charlie I knew that he was the one for Darla. I love my daughter but she can be headstrong so I figured a little help wouldn't be a bad thing."
Molly turned with renewed interest to Aurora, "Have you seen anything else? Like grandbabies?" she asked eagerly.
Aurora's face lit up, "Yes, you and I are going to be sharing lots of grandbabies."
"If there is anything I can do for you Charlie, you just let me know," Molly told her furiously blushing son.
Darla found Bill in the library dozing in an armchair. Sneaking up beside him she used his ponytail to tickle his neck. She had to stifle a shriek when he suddenly reached out and grabbed her pulling her into his lap.
"That was not nice," Bill said in threatening voice. "Now you must be punished."
"Please, sir, not punished," Darla pleaded trying not to laugh.
Bill sighed, "Okay. I'm too tired to punish you anyway," he yawned.
"You shouldn't have gone out last night with Cousin Pam," Darla said giggling.
"Yes, but she knows all the best clubs," Bill said cracking one slightly red eye to look at her.
"Don't you mean all the cheapest clubs," Darla asked.
"Cheap is sometimes good," Bill said. "Although I did take a hot shower with special soap when we came back, and I didn't drink anything unless it was served to me in an un-opened bottle at most of the places we went last night."
Bill noticed that while Darla was smiling it didn't reach her eyes, "So, how did it go this morning?"
Darla crossed her arms over her chest and huffed back against the arm of the chair, "Your plan worked fine, up until the part where he didn't catch me and I fell to the floor. I think I bruised something."
"Did he at least help you up?" Bill wanted to know.
"No, he said sorry he didn't see me and then stepped over me," Darla gave Bill a disgusted look, "I thought you said it was a plan guaranteed to work?"
"I'm sorry kid, it has always worked in the past," Bill told her looking surprised as he rubbed her back comfortingly. "Are you sure you want someone so dumb?"
Darla leaned her head on his shoulder. She and Bill had been talking last night at the reception the first time she had seen Charlie. He'd had to catch her to keep her from falling. Bill had helped her to a quiet corner and was going to get help for her. He wouldn't listen to her protests that nothing was wrong with her until she had finally broken down and explained what had happened.
Darla had reached up and touched his earring and told him exactly what breed of beast it had come from and how and where Bill had gotten it. Bill had taken that in stride. Being a curse breaker he had ran into stranger things. Seeing that Bill accepted that, Darla looked over at Charlie, "Do you know who that redhead is over there? I'm going to guess you do since there is a strong family resemblance."
"He's my younger brother Charlie, why?" Bill now was worried that maybe Darla had seen some disaster befall his brother, "Did you see something bad happen to him?"
Darla grinned at that, "Depends on what you define as a bad thing. I saw him getting married."
Bill decided it could be worse, "To whom?"
"To me."
Fred and George followed Alexis into the reception room. "Remus and Amber decided that although you didn't deliberately set out to ruin their reception," Alexis held up her hand to forestall any interruptions, "if you hadn't brought the bloody items, nothing would have happened. So you get the joy of cleaning up the mess your inventions caused. WITHOUT MAGIC."
"No magic," Fred wailed.
"It will take us all day," George complained.
"Yes, it will so you better get started," Alexis said grinning at them. "Brooms, mops, trash bags are over there," Alexis settled herself into a chair to watch.
With much grumbling and complaining the two began to pickup the mess. They had made a good start on cleaning up the trash when suddenly with a squawk Fred was now a flying piglet. He had bright canary yellow wings attached to a pig's body. The strangest thing was the feathered tail instead of a normal curly pig's tail.
"George, what happened to Fred? Surely you didn't let him eat anything?" Alexis was staring at what used to be Fred as he ran and jumped flapping his wings, coasting for a moment before crashing to the ground.
"One, I don't know what happened. Two, why would we eat anything, and finally," George said, "don't call me Shirley."
Alexis gave him an aggravated look before trying to hit Flying-Pig Fred with a stupefy charm. Fred was moving too erratically for her to get a good shot. He had crashed into a table when he popped back to normal.
"George, help me find the trash bag I was filling up, something in there turned me into the flying pig and I didn't even have to eat it! If we can figure it out, it would be the perfect prank!" Fred enthused.
George hurried over to the trash bag in question and began pawing through it. With a pop he became a strange combination of pig, canary and kitten. It was the ugliest thing Alexis had ever seen. Fred was yelling and running for the bag, "Don't move George, I want to see what you touched."
George, whonow had the head of a pig, the body of a kitten, a canary tail and was covered in a strange mix of cat hair and feathers, let out a squeal and took off running. Unfortunately his head was too heavy for his tiny kitten body and he fell over scraping his chin on the carpet. Fred managed to grab him just as he turned back into George.
Snape and Darien came in to find George sitting on Fred's lap and not too much cleaning done. "Alexis, I can see this is going to take a while. Darien and I are going to run out to a shop I know of to get some potion's ingredients."
Alexis gave them a nod and a smile as they left. She could hear Darien saying to Snape, "I thought those two were twins?" Snape could be heard responding and then Darien saying, "They seem awful close for brothers."
Alexis turned back to the two red-faced boys, "Go wash your hands and come back. It looks as if we are going to have to use magic or you two will be changing back and forth all day."
Fred whispered to George on their way out, "I told you it would work. Now we can use magic and get it done faster."
"Brilliant as always bro," George whispered back.
Charlie was packing in his room getting ready to return to Romania. Hearing the door open and close he didn't look up thinking it was Bill coming to finish packing. Charlie jumped about a foot when he felt soft hands run up his back and around his waist; Bill had never touched him like that!
Now there was a feeling of warm softness pressed up against his back and someone was nuzzling against him, "Bill, I've been hoping to catch you alone," Charlie heard Darla whisper against his back.
Charlie felt a stab of jealousy and hurt before retaliating in kind, "Stacie, I thought I told you not until tonight," Charlie said huskily.
"You…you…" the previously gentle hands were now digging painfully into his sides.
"Carla? Lona? Ouch what was that for?" Charlie grabbed the fingers that were now clawing and pinching him. Holding them he ducked out from under the arms and turned to face his tormentor, "Darla?" he managed with unflattering disbelief, "what are you doing in here? This is my room. I'm not sure where your room is," lying through his teeth, "but I'm sure someone knows if you have forgotten."
Charlie had to move quickly to avoid a kick Darla had aimed at a sensitive area, "Now see here, little girl, you could seriously hurt someone by doing that," he scolded her.
Darla was wiggling and squirming trying to get free to do damage to the annoying git. "I am not a little girl and I know you can seriously hurt someone that way. Why do you think I was trying to do it? I thought you were Bill," it was Darla's turn to lie. She had known that it was Charlie and thought this was one way to get his attention. She had been surprised at how angry it had made her when he called her by someone else's name. Now he was going to pay!
Charlie decided that it was time he got rewarded for his patience and self control. He let Darla's knee make contact with the outside of his leg and proceeded to fall back on the bed, turning at the last moment so that Darla was pinned under him on the mattress, "Now look what you have done," Charlie complained.
"ME!" Darla was almost incoherent in her frustration and resumed her squirming and wiggling much to Charlie's enjoyment.
"Yes, you. And now you have aggravated an old dragon injury and I cannot move," Charlie said pretending to grimace in pain while at the same time shifting so that he was pressed even closer to her.
Darla stopped moving and said, "Charlie, I'm sorry. Where does it hurt?" Now she was trying to free her hands so that she could soothe his pain.
Charlie released her hands and rested his head on her chest snuggling up against her, "It is my back."
Darla shivered at the feel of his breath on her skin, "What can I do to make it better?"
Charlie kept his head down, "Just let me rest here for a moment. Sometimes it stops all by itself."
Darla nodded while running soothing hands as far down his back as she could reach.
"Darla?"
"Yes Charlie?"
"I hate to ask this," Charlie paused.
"No, you can ask me anything, Charlie. I feel so bad about hurting you," Darla ran gentle fingers through his hair.
"It's just that the buttons on your robes are pressing into my face and it is really uncomfortable," Charlie told her.
"Oh that is simple," Darla said with a smile as she shifted the fabric on her robes so the buttons were over to one side.
That wasn't what Charlie had had in mind, "Thank you," he said rather petulantly.
"No problem, but Charlie, if your back isn't getting better maybe we need to call for someone. I don't know how much longer I am going to be able to stay like this, I've already lost feeling in my legs," Darla said apologetically.
"Here let me see if I can help," Charlie shifted so that he was still pinning her but more of his weight was supported by the bed. He began rubbing her legs through the fabric of her robes.
"What are you doing, Charlie?" Darla managed to squeak out.
"I'm trying to restore the circulation to your legs," he told her with an innocent look.
"I think they are fine now," Darla breathed out staring into his eyes.
"If you are sure," Charlie said as he continued to stroke her.
Darla tangled her fingers in his hair and pulled his head down to hers, "I'm sure," she whispered against his lips.
"DARLA? WHERE ARE YOU? DARLA?"
Charlie and Darla sprang apart as though they had been electrically charged. Charlie rolled off of her with a groan as the voice came closer, "DARLA GET YOUR FAT ARSE DOWN HERE! MUM AND DAD ARE READY TO GO!"
"I am going to kill him," Charlie heard her mutter right before she yelled, "JUST A MINUTE YOU MORON!"
"WE ARE LEAVING IN TEN MINUTES WITH OR WITHOUT YOU!"
"OKAY!" she hollered back before rolling on her side to look at him, "Are you going to be okay?"
Charlie reached out a hand to push back a silky strand of hair, "I'll manage," he said bravely.
"I am sorry I hurt you," Darla said softly.
"I know you didn't mean to," Charlie told her forgivingly.
"Do you think I can OWL you while you are in Romania? Just to check and make sure you recover," Darla hastened to add.
"It would be nice to have someone to write to," Charlie admitted.
Darla moved closer, "I had fun this weekend."
"I did too," Charlie smiled trying to remember he was supposed to be in pain and not able to move.
"Well I guess I better go," Darla shifted even closer.
"Someone will be looking for you soon," Charlie moved his fingers to the back of her neck drawing her near.
"Yes, they will," Darla inched over some more.
BANG! The door flew open and hit the wall revealing Molly and Aurora in the doorway, "CHARLES WEASLEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT INNOCENT CHILD?"
Darla jumped off the bed and turned on the two witches, "He wasn't doing anything and I am not a child! He hurt his back and I was trying to make sure he was going to be ok."
"And just why was it necessary for you to lay on the bed with him, young lady?" Aurora asked sternly.
"I AM NOT A CHILD!" Darla told them again. Turning to Charlie, she leaned down and gave him a brief hard kiss. "And I will do what I want with Charlie when I want to!" before storming out the door. They could hear her yelling at Darien, "WHERE IS MY LUGGAGE, YOU GREAT PRAT?"
Darien's response was lost in the sound of a slamming door.
Charlie folded his hands behind his head and gazed up at the ceiling savoring the memory of Darla pressed against him and the all too brief kiss. That was until Molly and Aurora appeared looming over him.
"You will not take advantage of her!" His mother told him, jabbing him in the chest with her finger.
"And while I support you two being together, no hanky panky," Aurora jabbed him a few times for good measure.
Charlie rubbed his chest and gave them a wounded look, "Yes, mothers."