Disclaimer: Not mine.
Chapter 39 Happy Happy Birthday Babies
You are only
young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
John P. Grier
Alexis was pouring over several different lists crossing out items and adding new ones. The detritus of a marathon planning session was scattered all around her chair. Snape came in just in time to see Slinky pop in with a slice of cake, "Heres is the sample I'se got from the kitchen, Mistress Snape," he handed her the plate.
"Hmmm," Alexis tasted it carefully. Noticing Snape, "What do you think Severus?" she held out a forkful for him to try.
Snape accepted the offering, "Tastes like cake."
"Yes but does it taste like the perfect birthday cake?" she asked him impatiently.
"Since I have never had the perfect birthday cake I would be the wrong person to ask," Severus settled into an arm chair and opened up the latest edition of Potions Quarterly, "and why do you need the perfect birthday cake?" he asked idly.
"Severus Snape I can't believe that you have forgotten that our sons' first birthday is in two weeks," Alexis stated indignantly.
"You forgot didn't you?" Snape said as he turned several pages looking for the article on the proper use of moonstones.
Alexis glared at him, "I did not forget," he looked at her over the top of the magazine, "…exactly," she conceded guiltily, "I didn't forget that their first birthday was coming, just forgot about planning a party."
That got Snape's attention. "A party?"
"Yes, a party," Alexis repeated with a hundred times more enthusiasm than Snape had said it the first time. "In fact it was Narcissa that reminded me that we should be planning a party for the boys."
"When did you see Narcissa?" Snape asked her intently.
"This morning in Diagon Alley," Alexis had returned to her lists, "Do you think we need to see if Hagrid can convince one of the unicorns to give the children rides or perhaps one of the centaurs would do it?"
Snape stared at his serious wife, "Alexis, the boys are only going to be one year old. How do you expect them to stay up on the back of a unicorn? And don't even suggest the centaur idea to anyone," he stated firmly. "They are extremely sensitive to any suggestion that they may possibly be used as mounts."
"I guess you're right," Alexis conceded reluctantly. "Maybe next year we can see about unicorn rides," she scratched something off of her list, "How about a merry-go-round then? Narcissa was telling me they still had the one they used for Draco's first birthday party."
"Just where are you planning on having this event?" Snape wanted to know.
"Albus said we could have it here," Alexis was making copious notes, "If it is wet we can have it in the Great Hall and if the weather is nice we can have it on the grounds," Alexis tapped her quill on her chin, "I wonder…"
Snape looked at her apprehensively.
"You know Harry Potter and the boys share the same birthday," before she could finish Snape had already started shaking his head in adamant denial.
"No, absolutely not. There is no way I am going to budge on this one," Snape had crumpled the magazine into an accordion, "My… I mean our sons are not going to share their first birthday party with the bloody boy who lives to make my life miserable."
"Albus probably wouldn't allow it anyway," Alexis made another note on the paper in front of her, "I have cake and ice cream, do you think we need to serve a sit down lunch or have it buffet style?"
Snape was staring at her completely nonplussed by the entire situation.
Alexis checked a few things off of her list, "Party balloons, I am using the same balloon manufacturer as the one I used for your balloons for Valentine's Day year before last," she flashed him a smile. "All we have to do is decide on a theme and they will charm the balloons to twist themselves into the appropriate shapes. I was thinking about dragons, or perhaps a Quidditch theme. Party favors and goody bags for the children. What do you think about having goody bags for the adults as well?" Alexis grinned but didn't wait for Snape's response. "I like that idea," she scribbled madly on her list, "just more adult versions of whatever we put in the kiddy bags."
"What type of games do children play at birthday parties?" Alexis asked Snape. "I know some of the Muggle games: pin the tail on the donkey, hot potato, three blind mice," Snape's eyes widened as she continued the list of games, "tug of war, poker faces…"Alexis trailed off as she caught the look on Snape's face, "What?"
"Don't you think those are a bit violent for a children's party? Poke her face and tug of war, sound like things they would do at a Death Eater gathering. And I really don't think Hagrid is going to let you remove a tail from a donkey just so you can pin it back on. Also, there is absolutely no way that Albus or Hagrid are going to let you go around blinding mice."
Alexis stared at him, "What on earth are you blathering on about? Severus I really don't have time for your jokes. Now please try to be serious."
She rapidly flipped several pages, "Do you think a clown or a magician? What am I thinking that would be a Muggle party?" Alexis chuckled, "Although," she grew thoughtful but let out a sigh, "no a Muggle themed party would NOT be a good idea in today's climate." She scribbled some more on her lists, "I have waited too long to get a decent band," she pursed her lips in disappointment.
"Why would we need a band?" Snape wanted to know.
"For musical chairs," Alexis responded not even looking up, "Oh, and of course for dancing after dinner. It wouldn't be a party if we didn't have dancing after dinner."
"Alexis, the boys are just now walking," Snape gave her a stern look, "I don't think they will be dancing or playing with chairs musical or otherwise."
She ignored that comment and leaned over and began shuffling through the stacks around her chair. Grabbing up a roll of parchment she handed it to Snape, "I need you to look over the guest list and make sure I haven't forgotten anyone please."
Snape opened up the parchment and watched as it unrolled down his lap and then continued down onto the floor for a good foot and a half, "Exactly how many people are you inviting?"
"I think there is almost an even one hundred and fifty if I did not miscount. That just doesn't seem right though," Alexis looked up at him with a furrowed brow, "Narcissa said they invited over three hundred people to Draco's first birthday party."
"One hundred and fifty guests to a children's birthday party?" Snape demanded, "They are not even a year old yet. I really don't think they know a hundred and fifty people."
"Of course they don't silly," Alexis smiled over at him, "Most of those are people we know for them."
"We know people for our sons?"
"Yes of course Severus," Alexis smiled at him again as she explained, "We have to make the correct contacts so that Nathair and Aleser will have every advantage."
Snape began to have an inkling of an idea, "Alexis, exactly how long were you and Narcissa together today?"
"Several hours," Alexis responded as she tried to retrieve the list to add a few more names to it that she had just remembered, "She was really helpful with ideas for the party and names of caterers and all, why do you ask?"
"Alexis do you really want to have an elaborate party for Aleser and Nathair, stop and think about it for just a minute? You would be running around like a mad witch, you would not have a minute to spend with the boys. In fact you would in all likelihood only be able to see the party in photographs."
Alexis stared at him stunned for a moment, "What was I thinking?"
"How about a nice picnic lunch with cake and ice cream and our closest friends?"
"Can I still have my balloons?" Alexis grinned up at him.
"As long as they do not form hearts nor shoot bows and arrows."
SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs
Snape and Remus stepped into a camera shop located at the far end of Diagon Alley. Snape had decided that his sons' birthday party was the perfect excuse for the purchase of a new camera. Alexis had been one hundred percent in favor of the idea. Amber had seconded the notion when she heard about it and had insisted that Remus join him on the shopping expedition. Snape had a suspicion that it was more the thought of them being out from underfoot for a few hours than the idea of a new camera that had the two witches so enthusiastic.
The camera shop was fully stocked with everything a wizarding photographer could need or want. As the tiny bell announced their presence, a young attractive blonde witch came out from the storeroom and flashed them a toothy smile, "Gentlemen, welcome to Smiley's Camera Emporium, my name is Wendi with an 'I' how may I be of assistance?"
Snape and Remus exchanged looks, why would they care how to spell her name. Snape shrugged slightly before turning back to Wendi with an "I" and replying, "I require a new camera."
"Wonderful," Wendi enthused and clapped her hands together, "What type of camera do you want?"
"I was thinking that you might be able to show me some models and perhaps tell me about them so that I can decide," Snape said slowly.
"I guess I could do that," Wendi replied equally slowly, "In fact I know I can do that," she bounced in delight.
Wendi gestured them over to one of the counters and began pulling out several cameras. Snape nodded to Remus, this was more like it. Stopping in front of the counter they waited for Wendi to begin her sales pitch.
Beaming happily at them she waved her hand at the dozen or so cameras neatly placed on the counter, "Taadaa!"
Snape waited.
Wendi smiled brightly and waved her hand again at the assembled cameras.
Snape glared and waited.
Wendi's smile dimmed a watt or two.
Snape's fingers began to drum a tattoo on the counter top.
Wendi's smile faltered.
Snape gritted out through clenched teeth, "Is there anything you would like to tell me about the cameras?"
Wendi's smile returned full force, "Of course sir," she picked up the first one, "This one is black and has a really bright flash," she handed him the camera.
Snape looked from her to the camera. Then he looked from the camera to Remus who was staring in shocked surprise at Wendi so he didn't notice Snape looking at him. "Is there perhaps another sales person who could assist me?" Snape sneered.
Wendi looked surprised, "I'll just go check."
As she disappeared into the back room Remus leaned in and whispered to Snape, "She must be related to Engvall."
Snape snorted in agreement.
There was a whisper of sound and a breathy voice asked, "May I assist you gentlemen?"
A red haired witch walked over to the counter and gave them a small smile, "Wendi said that you requested someone else help you?"
Snape eyed her intently. She looked vaguely familiar. He wondered if perhaps he had taught her, "Yes, I would like to know something about these cameras?" he indicated the ones that Wendi had placed on the counter.
She nodded, "I am Wendy with a 'Y' and these are all very nice cameras," a hint of enthusiasm crept into her voice. Snape nodded curtly while wondering why the sales clerks insisted that their customers know how to spell their names. Wendy with a 'Y' picked up one, "Now take this one," she smiled brightly and Snape again felt that flash of almost recognition, "You see the flash," she pointed and Snape looked, "it is very bright," Snape's eyes narrowed, "and if you will notice it is a very nice shade of black," Wendy was now grinning widely.
Snape glowered at her, "Is there perhaps someone working here who can tell me about the cameras you have for sale?" As she opened her mouth, "More than the brightness of the flash and the color?" his jaw was clenched as he spit out the words.
Wendy sniffed, "I will check," and she too disappeared into the back.
Remus commented, "Did she seem familiar to you?"
Snape nodded curtly, "She and Wendi with an "I" must be related."
"Do you know if Professor Engvall has any daughters?" Remus asked idly.
"Not to my knowledge," Snape shuddered slightly at the thought of Professor Wilhelmina procreating.
Just then a brunette witch stepped briskly out of the storeroom, "What'ya want?" she asked abrasively and popped her gum in time with her nails tapping on the counter.
Snape glared at her coldly, "I want to know something about these cameras?" before she could open her mouth, "Other than that the brightness of the flash and the color."
She glared back at him and pointed to the smallest camera on the table, "That one is really small," pointing to the next on in line, "this one weighs a lot," Snape stared at her as she continued down the line losing a little more of her abrasiveness with each camera, "this one is pretty and this one has a handy strap," she was becoming more bubbly and at the same time more familiar.
Snape interrupted her, "What is your name?"
The brunette stuttered to a stop staring at Snape with wide eyes before a big grin appeared, "Windi with two "I"s." she said triumphantly, "Now this camera here is very special," she held up the camera, "see it has two flashes so it is very, very bright and the case is a very shiny black."
Remus grabbed Snape's arm as he went for his wand. The tension was broken with the tinkle of the bell over the front door.
A short plump balding man came in carrying a sack of what appeared to be lunch, "Wendy why is the door unlocked?" starting slightly, "and why is your hair brunette again? I've told you time and time again that you need to maintain your natural blonde," he muttered in an aside, "it gives people a warning of what to expect."
The brunette cast her eyes down and looked guilty for a moment, "I just wanted to help Smiley. You wouldn't let me go get lunch."
Smiley interrupted, "Not after the last time. How you could fall for the magic bean soup tale?" he shook his head, "I know you want to help," he sighed, "Just take lunch and go into the back." As she turned to leave he added, "And fix your hair." She nodded dejectedly.
The plump wizard turned to Remus and Snape, "I hope you weren't too inconvenienced?" He winced slightly at Snape's glare, "I will give you a ten percent discount," he offered tentatively.
Snape nodded once in acknowledgement, "Now what can you tell me about these cameras?"
Smiley lived up to his name and smiled brightly, "Well this one here," he held up a camera, "is one of our most popular sellers. It has many interesting features."
Snape relaxed slightly as it looked as if they might finally be getting somewhere.
Smiley turned the camera and pointed to the flash, "See here," Snape nodded studying the flash. Smiley continued, "This flash is the brightest that I have ever seen. And the case, well there is none blacker."
SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs
Alexis smiled at Snape as they both looked over the party that was in full swing on the front lawns at Hogwarts, "You were right Severus, this is much better."
"Much better than what?" Severus asked as he scowled at the raucous pile of people who seemed to be trying to outdo themselves with having fun.
"Much better than that large elaborate party I was trying to plan," Alexis laughed as Aleser managed to grab George Weasley's hair instead of the balloon George was holding for him.
Snape shook his head at his wife. While there were not one hundred and fifty people present, the shear amount of activity going on made it feel and sound as if there were twice that many present.
A long table was piled high with gaily wrapped presents. Other tables groaning with food were scattered around the lawns and brightly colored balloons were tied to every available surface. Flitwick had charmed the area immediately surrounding the boys to rain confetti and streamers much to their delight.
Uncle Buck was over at one table amusing some of the children by transforming into any animal they requested. Snape started as he saw a full grown hippopotamus pop into being.
Alexis hurried over to rescue George before Aleser managed to yank him bald.
Snape noticed after Alexis had freed George that he and his twin were exchanging looks and nonchalantly heading over to a secluded area of the grounds. Being naturally suspicious as well as fully cognizant of all the trouble those two could cause, Snape followed him. The thought of Amber and Remus' wedding reception only spurred him on. There was no way he wanted a repeat of the Canary Creams.
Sneaking up on the dastardly duo he was just in time to see them enlarge a box one of them had taken from a pocket. They were so intent on what they were doing that neither noticed Snape.
"And what do we have here Misters Weasley?" he asked silkily.
They started slightly, "Just a little surprise for the tiny tots," the one on the right grinned cheekily.
"A few small things to enhance the party as it were," the other grinned identically.
"Nothing to worry about," they began to back away.
"We will just go and put these someplace safe," they looked ready to make a run for it.
Snape pulled his wand; "How about if I take the box and see to its safety?" it wasn't really a question.
Fred and George glared at him for a moment before surrendering the carton, "It was just a few fireworks."
Snape nodded curtly before waving them to return to the party. Why Alexis had to ask those two to the party he just couldn't understand.
After a moment's consideration Snape put the box behind Hagrid's hut. While he was back there he noticed a large crate covered with burlap sacks. Curious he walked closer noticing a faint rattling sound coming from the box.
"Ho there Pr'fesser, Don't want to be goin' an' spolin' me surprise," Snape turned as Hagrid called out as he came around the corner.
"Hagrid, exactly what kind of surprise do you have planned?" he asked suspiciously. Hagrid was not known for the appropriateness of his surprises.
Hagrid winked at him, "Jus' summpin' to make yer young men's day special. Its' not every day yer young man turns one now."
Snape really wanted to see what was in the crate now but Hagrid had his arm and was pulling him back to the party. Snape made a mental note to sneak back. When the crate started to rock violently; he decided it would have to be soon.
Snape was able to escape Hagrid and quickly found Remus and apprised him of the suspicious crate behind Hagrid's hut. Remus agreed to take care of the crate and disappeared while Snape went to distract Hagrid.
Snape was beginning to become worried about the amount of time Remus was taking. Snape was about to go looking for him when Remus staggered out from behind Hagrid's hut. Remus' robes were singed and torn. He was also covered in dust and ash and had a long scrape on his left arm that was still bleeding.
Snape tried to hurry over to him without attracting any attention. George and Fred were amusing everyone by charming the balloon animals to fight. Snape managed to make his way over to Remus without anyone noticing. He quickly cast cleaning and repairing charms before whispering, "Ogden's Fire Whiskey in a flask under the present table behind the middle leg. The flask looks like an old boot."
Remus nodded in appreciation.
"What was in the crate?" Snape asked.
Remus just shuddered and turned a whiter shade of pale, "You don't want to know," he shook his head as he stumbled over to find the flask, "you really don't want to know."
Snape watched to make sure Remus was going to be able to make it to the table. When he saw Remus bend over and then come up a few moments later looking slightly better Snape made is way to where Alexis and Molly were watching Draco and Ginny play with the boys.
Snape walked up behind Alexis and smirked as he watched Nathair try to shove a handful of grass up Draco's nose.
Draco calmly removed the grass and tickled the toddler's tummy.
Alexis looked back at Snape, "Time for the cake?"
Snape quirked an eyebrow at her reminding her that he was even more in the dark regarding this type of party ritual than she was.
Alexis then turned to the guru of all things to do with children, "Molly do you think it is time for the cake?"
Molly smiled, "You may want to open presents first as they will be very messy when they finish eating the cake and ice cream," she advised. "Why don't you take the boys over to the present table and I'll start sending everyone over there?"
Alexis nodded grateful that the Weasley matriarch was a natural leader. Ginny and Draco each assisted a birthday boy in walking over to the table laden with gifts.
Snape had been able to purchase a camera especially for the party at a twenty-five percent discount from Smiley's Camera Emporium. He and Remus had spent an entire evening figuring out how to work the thing. He had been out on the lawns the day before scouting out the perfect location for the photos according to the time of day that the events were supposed to occur. The tables for the presents and cake were set up so that they would get the best light for pictures from between two and three in the afternoon.
"Severus, hurry it up," Alexis hissed at him as he continued to fuss with the tripod and focus.
"It will take as long as it takes," he replied snidely, "I want to make sure that everything is perfect."
"Where's Colin Creevey when you need him?" Ron muttered from the crowd.
Snape's death glare was interrupted by his mad grab for his tripod as it slowly listed to one side and began to topple over.
Finally after innumerable adjustments Snape decreed that they could begin opening presents. Ginny and Draco woke the babies up and handed them their first presents. Nathair chuckled and stuck the corner of the box in his mouth and began gnawing on it. Aleser took one look at the garishly wrapped present and burst into loud wails. Snape snapped his first shot.
Several long minutes later and after much coaching and encouragement from Molly, the presents began to be opened. Dumbledore had given the boys matching play robes in bright purple with shooting silver stars across the bottoms.
Minerva had given them green tartan hats. Filius had provided them with play wands and the Weasley boys had given them toy brooms.
Remus and Amber's gifts were tiny toddler Quidditch robes. Snape waited until no one was looking and transfigured them from red and gold to green and silver. When Remus noticed he transfigured them back. Later that evening when Alexis was putting everything away she found the tiny sets and burst into laughter. The robes were a kaleidoscope of colors: primarily red, gold, green and silver but some of the colors had merged and combined to form new colors never before imagined by man or wizard. It was as if some mad tie-dying demon had gotten hold of them and run amuck.
He quickly finished the first roll of film and tried to reload the camera. He was hurrying because the boys were on a roll and were not inclined to wait for daddy. He felt like a pro as he slipped the second roll of film in the case and firmly pressed the back closed as he brought the camera up for the perfect shot of the boys hugging their new toy dragons. A muffled yelp brought Remus hurrying over.
"What?" Remus eyed Snape's grimace in concern, "Stop it Severus you are scaring the boys."
Snape's hands were shaking and his teeth were gritted, "Help me you fool," he muttered.
Remus looked down at the camera Snape was holding out to him, "Fine, I don't mind taking some photos. All you had to do was ask," he whispered back and took the camera from Snape. Snape came with the camera, or at least his left hand did. Remus winced as he saw that Snape had caught the webbing between his thumb and forefinger in the latch of the film compartment.
"Hold on Severus," Remus tried to release the catch and free Snape's skin, "It's stuck," he muttered pulling on it causing another muffled yelp from Snape, "Oops, sorry," Remus grimaced in apology and wiggled the latch more gently finally getting it to pop loose and release Snape.
"Thank you," Severus gritted out wanting desperately to suck on the sore spot on his hand.
Remus got a strange look on his face before whispering, "At least the flash is very bright and you didn't mar the black case."
Remus took a quick step back as Snape glared at him before returning to photographing the party.
The Malfoys had purchased both the boys controlling interest in a small wizarding company. Draco had bought them something on his own. He had found a child's set of Quidditch balls. They were charmed to work exactly the same as their larger counterparts just at slower speeds and both the quaffle and bludgers were made of a soft, springy material.
Hermione Granger, who was staying with the Weasleys, had won Snape's approval, although she would never know it, with her gift of tiny cauldrons and miniature sets of scales and weights.
Molly had knitted tiny jumpers and Arthur had included some Muggle children's books he had found. Hagrid's gifts were bundled into a cage and Remus and Snape had quietly agreed to release them back into a distant and secluded section of the Forbidden Forest.
After Hagrid's gifts Alexis lost track of the rest of the presents but Ginny Weasley was keeping a list so that thank you notes could be sent out.
The large stack of gifts was eventually exhausted as was Alexis' patience with Severus and his constant camera clicking. If he made her pretend to help the boys re-open one more present just so he could get a better shot she was going to stupefy him and prop him against a tree.
Molly and Amber picked up the tiny tots who were beginning to droop and carried them over to the table where the birthday cake waited. There was a large cake that was beautifully decorated with icing roses and the message spelled out in bright blue icing "Happy Birthday Nathair and Aleser". This time Remus insisted on taking the camera so that Snape and Alexis could help the boys blow out the candles.
Snape flicked his wand to light the candles on the big cake. Remus had been assisting Snape with the photo shoot and neither realized that the other had lost track of the Weasley twins.
When the candles started singing "Happy Birthday" Snape and Alexis exchanged looks each asking the other, "Did you do that? And why are there so many candles on the cake?"
Before they could do more than shake their heads the candles jumped free of the cake and began doing a conga around the top of the cake. The boys were laughing in delight so the bemused parents smiled over in thanks at Flitwick.
Filius however had such a look of impressed surprise that it was immediately evident that this was not his work.
The candle conga was getting faster and faster and Alexis was starting to become concerned because the faster the conga the higher the candle flames. When the candles decided to build a pyramid all the while happily singing Happy Birthday, Alexis waved everyone back from the edge of the table. But the pyramid was completed faultlessly, the dismount was perfect and the candles bowed as the audience clapped.
One of the candles had burned slightly brighter than its fellow candles and was rather lopsided. This caused it to overturn while completing the bow and knock the candle in front of it wick first into the icing. The candle went out with a sizzle. The rest of the candles gathered around their fallen comrade. Helping the prematurely snuffed candle up they began to advance upon the lopsided candle stopping only long enough to scoop up globs of icing. The lopsided candle was scurrying trying to hide behind an icing rose, but the remaining candles soon had him surrounded. An icing ball fight erupted and Alexis watched in horror as her perfectly decorated perfect birthday cake was reduced to a war torn landscape.
"Severus, do something?" she cried, "They are ruining the boys' cake," she was practically in tears.
Snape looked from his upset wife to his sons who were clapping and laughing at the antics of the candles, "Where's my camera?"
SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs
It had taken the combined wand work of Severus, Flitwick and the Weasley twins before order was restored to the birthday cake. Alexis stared in stunned disbelief at the tattered remains of what had once been a glorious cake. Fred and George were supervising the removal of the remaining candles while Snape and Flitwick were trying to reattach some of the icing roses that had been used as ammunition.
Snape stepped back to check out the repair work. The cake now said "Hap B y Na r Al" and there were holes where the candles had actually broken through the icing covering and had started lobbing bits of cake at each other. Snape and Flitwick had filled them in as best they could. It was a very different cake than the one that the house elves had originally placed on the table. Snape noticed something sticking up slightly from behind a rose. Levitating it revealed that it was the original lopsided candle which was now nothing more than a wick and runny wax. Holding the candle gingerly by the wick in front of him Snape turned to the waiting crowd, "Cake anyone?"
SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs SsSsSsSsSs
It was midnight and Nathair and Aleser had finally crashed from their sugar rush and were fast asleep. Alexis had collapsed on the couch and Snape was sprawled out next to her.
"I can't believe it is finally over," Snape muttered as he rubbed at a strange blue stain on the back of his left hand. "What type of dye did they use in that icing?" he asked irritably.
"I really don't know," Alexis sighed, "And right this very minute I really don't care."
Snape grunted his agreement and contemplated the inside of his eyeballs, "We really should go to bed before we both fall asleep right here."
Alexis huffed out a breath, "As usual you are right. Thank Merlin, Circe and Agrippa that it will be a whole year before we have to do this again."
Snape shot straight up as though stuck with a pin and in a horrified voice, "We have to do this again?"