Author's notes:

-Bubblegum Crisis and all related characters are the property of Artmic/AIC.

-This story uses the setting and characters of the original BGC OVA series; in other words, it takes place in late 2032. It is set immediately after the events of episode #3, "Blow Up".

-This was written in October of 1998 in response to a writing challenge issued by one Stan Arnold on a now-defunct Bubblegum Crisis message board. It's short and to the point, and I happen to think it turned out rather well.

AMBIVALENCE

"...Well, there, we did it. We 'took out' Mason. Are you happy now, Priss!"
"Shut up."
The elevator hummed quietly, providing a cold backdrop to the conversation as it carried the three back up to street level. Meanwhile, they were still trying to sort out the actions of the fourth member of their 'group' -- actions that, not an hour earlier, had forever changed their individual perspectives.
"Hey, I heard your voice when we got to the top!" Linna continued, pressing onward despite Priss's tone. "You can't pretend it doesn't bother you. You were just as shocked as we were, to see her standing there, with her sword... like that... and his blood spilling out at her feet..." She ran a hand through her hair. "God, I didn't think she'd really DO it. Not THAT way."
"I SAID, shut up!" Priss snapped, looking up to glare at her friend. "SOMEBODY had to stop that guy, and Sylia was the only one who could. She did what she had to do." She looked away again. "Sure, I was surprised... it wasn't what I'd expected would happen... but what do you care, anyway, as long as you get paid?"
"It's not ABOUT that!" Linna cried, causing Nene to squirm in the corner of the elevator. "Yeah, I admit it -- when it comes to the Knight Sabers, I'm in it more for the money than for anything else. But in case you've forgotten, we're not GETTING paid for what we did tonight!" Her voice cracked. "Nobody ASKED us to--"
"And so what!" Priss shot back, taking a step forward to look Linna straight in the eye. "Sylia said it herself, right from the start. Not every job we take will be a nice, clean one. We don't live in a perfect world. Mason... He was too dangerous. Who knows how many people he's killed!"
Suddenly, her voice dropped to the level of a whisper.
"Tomorrow, I have to take a kid to live with his relatives. His mom died this afternoon. You know about that, but do you know WHY she died! It was because that son of a bitch Mason couldn't wait an extra thirty fucking seconds to tear down a building. It didn't bother him to take one life and ruin another, so why should it bother US to take HIS life!"
"But is that REALLY what you wanted to do!" Linna demanded. "Is that what the Knight Sabers are for? Revenge? I never wanted to be an accessory to murder -- and that's exactly what we all ARE now, you know!" She turned to glare at Nene, who had flinched visibly at the word 'murder'. "What about you, Miss AD. Police? Doesn't this bother YOU?"
Nene stared back at her for a moment in stunned silence, then averted her eyes. "E-even cops kill people," she reasoned, "In self-defense, when their own lives are in danger." She spoke very quietly, as if reluctant to say anything about it. "Mason would have killed Sylia, if she hadn't killed him first. That makes it self-defense."
"Is it still self-defense if the only reason we even WENT to GENOM was to kill him?" Linna asked. "It could never have happened if we hadn't gone there." She stared intently at Priss.
The elevator doors opened. Beyond them was a short hallway which led to the rear exit of the Silky Doll building.
There was a long moment of uncomfortable silence.
"...You wanna know what REALLY bothers me about it?" Priss finally said. "I'd swear to God, that sick bastard was SMILING when she did it. THAT'S what creeps ME out."
"Like he WANTED her to kill him?" Linna covered her mouth with her hand as she spoke, as if she were trying to physically stop her voice from shaking. "God, what if that's IT. He WANTED the Knight Sabers to be murderers -- Priss, now we could be hunted like criminals--!"
"KNOCK IT OFF!" Priss shouted, her voice echoing down the hallway as they stood in the elevator. She grabbed Linna's shoulders and stared into her eyes, as if willing her to be calm. "Leon will vouch for us. He hated Mason as much as everyone else in this town; there won't be a murder investigation. Right, Nene?"
"Um... yeah. Right." She didn't sound very sure.
"And if anything else happens, Sylia will take care of it. She always has before, right? Just take it easy." Priss's expression made it clear that she wouldn't take 'no' for an answer.
Linna took a deep breath and nodded quickly, although the look in her eyes was hardly one of peace or serenity. Priss let her go and stepped off the elevator.
"Who cares what the reason was," she said bluntly. "It was the right thing to do. Him or us. That's all." She turned and stalked down the hall toward the exit.
"Keep saying that," Linna called as she followed Priss, her voice echoing in the narrow hallway. "Maybe you'll even start to BELIEVE it, eventually."
Their argument continued out of earshot, as they left the building.
A minute or so passed, and then Nene followed them out. Of course, they were both long gone by then, leaving her alone with her own thoughts.

Nene drove her little scooter home in a dazed, almost trance-like state. Thinking about it later, she was amazed that she'd made it there without having an accident.
She stumbled inside, not sure what to think or feel, and not sure if she really WANTED to do either. The entire night had seemed surreal to her, since that moment.
The moment when Sylia had sliced open Brian J. Mason's jugular vein without batting an eye... when he'd fallen to the ground at her feet, his blood pouring out like a river... when Sylia had calmly etched the Knight Sabers signature into the pavement less than a foot from his now-lifeless head.
It felt like it had all been just a dream, and even after watching Sylia brush the whole thing off, even after hearing Linna and Priss argue about it, she still wasn't sure it had really happened. She half-expected to wake up any minute, her clock alarm warning her what would happen if she were late for work.
Feeling like a zombie, she made a trip through the small kitchen. She took something out of the fridge (she didn't notice what), and fell onto the couch.
She flipped on the TV, and was greeted by the image of Toshiro Mifune lopping some poor fool's head off.
Nene barely had enough time to make it to the bathroom before she threw up.
The toilet felt solid; solid enough to convince her that she wasn't dreaming, and that it HAD really happened. She fell against the wall, sobbing, wishing she could deny it.
What WERE the Knight Sabers really for? She'd thought they existed to protect people from rampaging Boomers; to do things that AD. Police wasn't equipped, or allowed, to do. That was why they were kept secret. Sylia couldn't share her technology with just ANYONE, after all.
But what if Linna was right?
What if it was only about revenge, and nothing else? What if Sylia WAS a murderer--?
No. Nene couldn't accept that. Sylia was a good person -- more than that, she was a GREAT person, the finest and most admirable person she'd ever met! She wouldn't do something like... that... unless she was absolutely sure it HAD to be done, and that there was no other way. Yes. Mason would have come after THEM next, he would've had them all killed. Sylia HAD to kill him, to protect everyone!
That HAD to be it, because if it wasn't, then... then Nene couldn't go on being a Knight Saber, AND a member of AD. Police. If the Knight Sabers became criminals, then she couldn't uphold the law while she was breaking it at the same time... But she couldn't quit the Knight Sabers, either, because she felt more USEFUL with them than she did with AD. Police. Even though Priss and Linna made fun of her, Sylia always told her she was doing a good job... and that was the important thing, wasn't it...?
Sylia always knew best, she always did what was right...
...Which was why Nene couldn't understand why she felt like she was going to be sick again.

Written 10 / 01 / 1998
By Corey Smith at Masterwork Productions