So today I was leaving Fairytopia. The queen of the tibbits, Alyx, said she would give me three wishes because of my nobility and because she was damn grateful that I was going to get back her party neccesities.

"Tell me your wishes!" Alyx said, sounding exactly like a transvestite version of the fairy godmother from 'Cinderella.'

"First, I would like two people to accompany me on my journey!"

Damn straight I wasn't doing this by myself. Alyx took out a pink, furry wand with a star on top that had ribbons coming out in all directions. She gave her wand a flick, and two people appeared looking quite flustered.

"What the hell!" A dwarf-type creature said. She was very short, like a midget. She had mid-length blonde hair and was very, very pale. She was looking a little pissed off.

" Who are you?" Alyx asked, looking proud and expectant.

"Wait- you summoned them but, you don't know who they are?" I was very surprised at first but then i thought, 'What did i expect from an idiot like Alyx?'

"Yeah, it's not like i was going to give you any of my servants."

"Damnation! I had almost slayed it! Why have you done this! Noooooooooooo!" frantically screamed the other person that Alyx had summoned. She was wearing a red and black samurai suit, and the only part of her you could see wear her bright blue eyes, and pale skin. What the hell is this one? Alyx couldn't have summoned any worse people to accompany me on my journey. I will kill that bitch! Actually, no I won't...

"Um, yeah. So calm down because I really don't care, you know, about your life or your problems. Or I just don't give a shit about you," said Alyx sounding like a bitch.

" I am a Panda-slayer. You must treat me with the proper respect I deserve because I, Morgan of Zarna, rid the world of the evil known as pandas. Nothing will stop me in my mission to destroy them all. Not even fluffy kitties," Morgan of Zarna said frantically. Then having said that, she randomly pulled out a cute, fluffy kitty.

"Cutesy, cutesy!" chorused the dwarf and Alyx. Their eyes were big and round, and they looked like the wanted to hug the little kitty.

They both screamed as Morgan of Zarna placed the kitty on the floor, and squished the kitty under her black boots.

" Yes, not even that cute kitty could stop me from slaying a panda."

" I, Fern of Gobletton, wish to know why you despise pandas." said the blonde dwarf, who now looked sad that the little cutesy kitten was squished. The dead kitten was also starting to make a smell. It wasn't exactly a good smell either.

" Well, you see-"

" Hey, can we get back to me now? I want to make the rest of my wishes now." I said, feeling annoyed that I, the savior of the faeries beer and marijuana, had been forgotten.

Everyone stared at me like I was a narcissistic bitch.

" Okay, good. Now that we're all foccused on important things, such as myself, for my second wish, I want...a kickass sword to kill gypsies with, that comes with magical powers."

"Why the hell would you want that?" asked the other three in unison.

" Because it just sounds pretty kickass. I could also pwn like, gypsies and stuff, with a sword."

With a flick of Alyx's wand, I was given a kickass sword.

" And for my final wish I want some... chocolate pudding." After I said this, three pairs of eyes gave me very confused looks

"I'm hungry! Now give me my pudding, dammit!"

Alyx gave me my pudding, and Morgan, Fern, and I said our farewells to Alyx and started our long journey for Gypsyland.