Notes:
Hello, just a note before we get to the story. First sorry for the long, unexpected hiatus. Work has been insane for a while and my dad isn't doing well. I wanted to assure you though that I won't abandon a fic. I might get distracted, but I'll always come back. I am hoping to up have an update out each week. Although it may not be an update on each story, it will at least let you know I'm still around. Lol! I've gotten a little written ahead, I've new some standalone fics that will come out as well. Thank you all so much for all the support, the hits, comments and messages. You inspire me!
Chapter Text
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Severus Snape woke up with an intense sense of foreboding. As he entered the Great Hall, he observed that it seemed to have settled over the whole castle. The students were on edge, the instructors frazzled, even Dumbledor looked concerned. The old man was quiet and withdrawn, refraining from joining any conversation.
Severus approached Dumbledor after the meal. "Albus," he called. The older wizard looked somewhat lost and seemed almost startled to see the potions master standing before him.
He quickly schooled his features and smiled. "Severus, did you need something?" he asked.
"I'd like to speak with you," he replied, hoping Albus could shed light on why everyone was on edge.
"Yes, yes," he said absently. "I really do need to speak with you today, but not now. I'm much too busy now."
Severus frowned. "When will you be free?" he pressed.
"I can't say yet, but I'll call for you when I'm ready," he countered as he turned and walked away.
Snape watched him leave. He wouldn't be getting any answers now, so he decided to head to class.
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Severus had recruited Tonks and Shacklebolt to help in his practical lessons that day. Lupin had joined them, despite not being invited. The potions master allowed it though. It was obvious that the wolf was uneasy and wanted to keep his wife within sight. He allowed the mongrel to stay. Honestly he needed all the help he could get.
The students were wound up and nervous. Spells kept going wild. When a 7th year almost hit him with a stray jinx, he'd had enough. "Stop!" he yelled out catching everyone's attention. "What has gotten into you today? How do you expect to survive an actual battle it you can't even keep your wits about you in class?"
The students looked shocked by his outburst and seemed afraid to move. "He's right," a voice chimed in from the back of the room. Remus made his way to the front of the class to stand next to the potions master. "I've seen battle and I've taught this class before. I can attest that if you can't hold your focus here, you won't be able to in the heat of a fight."
"Oi! My darling husband is right," Tonks said taking her place next to her mate. "You've been taking defense for years. Granted some of your instructors have been better than others, but you've also had the advantage of this bloke." The auror gestured towards Snape. "Teaching you this year. Plus, you've been blessed with my instruction and that of many others. You know what to do. So, take a deep breath, pull up your big kid pants and concentrate," she ordered.
The students then turned to Kingsley to see if you would add anything. The man put up his hands and laughed, "How can I add anything when the lady so eloquently stated it already."
"Now that the motivational speeches are over," the potions master drawled calling the class's attention back to him. "We can continue. Pair up!"
The students did as they were instructed, took a deep breath, squared their shoulders and resumed their duals. There were no more wild spells for the rest of class.
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"So, what do you think it is?" Remus asked as the last group of students left the room.
"Something foul is in the air," Kingsley answered softly.
"Do you think the kids are in danger?" Tonks asked.
"Aren't they always?" Snape countered.
Tonks sighed and looped an arm around Remus and gave him an affectionate squeeze. "I would say this conversation would go better with a pint, but I have a feeling we should keep our wits about us tonight. "
"That I'll have to agree with," Snape replied. " I have a meeting now with Albus. Perhaps he can shed some light."
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Severus made his way up to Dumbledor's office. He hadn't even knocked before the headmaster bade him enter. "Severus! Come in, my boy," he called.
The potions master was taken aback by the old man's appearance. He seemed to have shrunk since he'd seen him at lunch. "Albus?" Snape started, but the other wizard waved off his concern.
"No need to worry, son. Although I will admit that my time is near, and a little earlier than I expected," Dumbledor trailed off as he threw a glance out the window as evening approached.
"What are you talking about, Albus? If your potions need adjusting, I'm more than capable…" the potions master said, but was once again cut off.
"No, no, Severus, that time is over," he said, "I have another need of you now. There is little time, I have much to tell you. Please sit."
Snape did as he was requested, but the dread in his heart was almost overwhelming. He knew that whatever it was that Dumbledor was about to reveal would destroy him.
"What do you know of horcruxes," Albus began.
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Severus stormed through the castle. He'd spent, no wasted, years, over a decade in service to Dumbledor in order to keep Lily's son safe just for the old prat to kill him. A sacrificial lamb raised for the slaughter, and, by Merlin, he'd been tasked with leading the boy to it.
His occlumency shields were cracking under the weight of the emotions that roiled inside him. He knew he shouldn't unleash his anger and sorrow on the children around him, but he was having a hard time convincing himself that he cared. He'd barely made it into his quarters before they fell.
His knees buckled as he slammed the door shut, activating his wards. He didn't even bother to get up before he'd summoned a bottle of firewhiskey. Gone were his intentions of staying sober and alert. All he wanted now was to burn his memories from his brain. His whole life was a waste, and he had no desire to keep any of it.
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Severus Snape was well and truly in his cups by the time he heard a knock on his door. "Who the fuck," the man groused as he made his way to his door. To be honest, it wasn't a long trip seeing as he never bothered to move from the place he'd fallen, what one…two hours ago? He managed to make it to his feet without toppling.
He wrenched open the door intending on eviscerating whoever stood behind it. He was taken aback when he found Miss Granger in front of him. "Hermione?" he said, forgetting himself. The young woman's eyebrows shot up from his informal greeting. Severus shook his head. Merlin, he was a fright. His clothes disheveled and obviously sauced.
"Draco ask me to give this to you," the girl said by way of explanation and handed the potions master an envelope. That dread sprung back to life again as he opened and read the missive.
Sev,
It's happening tonight. Don't try to stop it. Plans have already been set in motion and cannot be changed now. I don't know what all is going to happen tonight, but I can't imagine that some of the blame won't fall onto you. I'm sincerely sorry for that. I thought you'd like the chance to say good bye to Hermione. Please, keep her safe.
D.
Severus felt like he'd been punched in the gut once more. Tonight? He wasn't ready. Merlin, the old fool had known. What of his chance to say goodbye to his old mentor? That opportunity was lost, slipped away. The potions master felt as if he couldn't breathe.
"Professor?" the girl asked, a look of concern on her face. He cracked. He pulled the girl who he'd have loved to have as a daughter to him. At least he could say goodbye to her. He held her tight as a few tears managed to escape his eyes. When he felt her arms wrap around him to embrace him back, he broke. His knees gave out once more and drug them both to the floor.
Severus held onto the girl desperately as he cried out his grief for all that he'd lost and was about to lose again. Hermione stroked his back and hair, rocking him as she whispered words of comfort.
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When his tears were finally spent, he pulled back from the young woman sheepishly. He was grateful when he realized she had managed to close the door during his break down. He got to his feet and held out a hand to help Hermione up as well.
"I just need to…" he started; his voice hoarse from his tears.
Hermione nodded needing no more explanation and turned to hang her cloak. She had the grace to take an inordinately long amount of time to do it. Saving him the indignity of her seeing him stumble to the bathroom.
Once inside he scourgified the smell of whiskey off him and righted his clothes. He downed a sober up potion along with a hangover cure and washed his face as he waited for them to kick in.
When he emerged, he looked calm and composed. Although he was concerned by what Hermione might ask or say. He found her in "her" chair with a stack of tests in her lap, grading them. "Thank you," he said, not knowing if he was referring to the tests or the…..
"It looked like you could use some help," she responded vaguely as she continued to work.
Snape smiled at the ambiguity. Slitheryns certainly were rubbing off on her. "Would you like some tea?" he asked.
Hermione looked up and smiled. "Yes, please and a meal too, if you don't mind. I missed supper this evening."
He'd skipped his own meal so he didn't know if the cheeky girl wanted to eat or if she wanted to make sure he did. He supposed it didn't really matter, since he actually was quite hungry himself. He called for Bilby and ordered a meal for them to share.
The next few hours were nirvana to Severus or at least as close as he'd ever get. They chatted amicably as they picked at their meals and graded. He even laughed a few times. It was a sweet domesticity that he never thought he'd enjoy.
When there was another knock on the door. He knew the dream was over.