FG: Hey, welcome back to CC2! Today, we have yet another reviewer see what it takes to be a disclaimer guest!
Robin: An' they hafta be a victim ta yer cruel an' unusual punishment.
FG: Um…what?
Robin: Ya find out what they like most, an' make 'em obsessed wit' it ta take up space. Remember whatcha did ta Gnecdah?
Gnecdah: WHEN YOU CRIIIIIEEEEEED, I'D WIPE AWAY ALL YOUR TEEEEEAAAAARS! WHEN YOU'D SCREEEEEAAAAAM, I'D FIGHT AWAY ALL OF YOUR FEEEEEAAAAARS!
Robin: (twitches) See?
FG: Yeah…well, it's funny, isn't it?
Neassa: 'Course it's funny!
FG: Thanks. Please welcome Chapter 14's disclaimer guest, Neassa!
Other reviewers: HER?
ECHO230: How dare you?
Psycogirl234: I'm appalled, FG.
Krystal: I wanted to be in it SO bad, nya…
Kaiya: You'll get your turn, calm down.
Krystal: Shut up, nya! (chases Kaiya away)
FG: Don't worry, everyone will be a disclaimer guest eventually. So, why don't you introduce yourself, Neassa?
Neassa: Well, my name's Valerie, but you can call me Neassa, obviously. I like fire, Kingdom Hearts, fire, Star Wars, fire, Lord of the Rings, fire, Halo, fire, X-Men, fire, various books, fire, video games, fire-
Robin: So you're basically a pyromaniac, huh?
Neassa: (nods while shaking a flamethrower)
FG: Um…Neassa…you probably shouldn't…
Neassa: Don't tell me what to do! (shakes the flamethrower) Stupid thing won't work!
FG: Um…Neassa…?
Neassa: Hmm? (sets herself on fire) AGH! Call 911! Call 911! Call 911!
Bernie: Waterga! (dumps water on Neassa)
Neassa: (sighs in relief) That's better… (sets herself on fire again)
Everyone else: (sweatdrop)
Neassa: That's MUCH better! (dances around while on fire) Burn, baby burn…doody-doody-doo-doo-doo…burn, baby, burn… (hums Disco Inferno)
Jake: Coooool!
FG: Um…can you say the disclaimer now?
Neassa: (stops dancing) Sure! FG owns Emma, Dia, Jake, Robin, Bernie, Coeur/Hart, Miaow, Haiiro, Eclipse, Taylor, Lyze, Silke, Kinzoku, Sadym, Alissa, and Miru. La-la-la, doody-doo… (resumes twirling around while on fire)
Dia: She's…interesting…
Neassa: Burn, baby, burn…doo-doo-doo…
FG: (laughs nervously) Here's Chapter 14.
… … … … … … … … …
"Axel!" Jake squealed.
The redheaded Organization member, still in a proud stance, peered down at Jake. "I see I'm more popular in the real world than I thought." Jake nodded eagerly in response.
Silke glared at him. "I am NOT paying you to talk to your fans! I am paying you to take us to the thirteenth floor!" She gestured to the highest turret of Castle Oblivion.
"Fine, fine." Axel rolled his eyes, then straightened his back. "Attention…um…what was your group called again?"
"Juu Senshi," Silke reminded him, clearly irritated.
"Yeeeeeaaaaah, that's it." He dipped his hand into his cloak. "Where did I put them…" After a few moments of rummaging, he extracted a pack of cards. "Ugh! I'm missing one…viera!" Axel looked up at Lyze. "Do you have a spare Hollow Bastion card from when you were talking to Naminé?"
Lyze turned red. "You know that I was stealing cards from here?"
"Just give it to me," he insisted. Pouting, Lyze handed a grey card with a picture of Hollow Bastion to Axel. "Now, was that so hard?" Grinning, he faced the large door. "Since you guys are with me, I don't think anything will happen to your memories. But if you feel you're forgetting things, talk to me."
"Can't you just teleport us to the 13th floor?" Bernie asked.
"I can only teleport myself."
Lyze grinned. "I can teleport us."
Axel shook his head. "No, you can't. That reminds me: your memories will stay intact, but you'll forget all of your attacks and spells," he warned them. "You need…" Fourteen small packages appeared in his hand. "…cards."
… … …
"Traverse Town!" Bernie shouted. She ran around the 1st District. "Awesome!"
Axel examined a map. "Our first cut-scene room is straight ahead."
"Ooh, can I do it?" Jake snatched a card out of Axel's hand.
"No," Axel replied. It was too late, though; Jake was barreling towards the door.
He squinted at the inscription. "Card must be three or higher." Jake looked at the card he had stolen; it was a Tranquil Darkness 4. "Yay!" He held out the card, then walked through the door.
On the other side, Emma, Sora, Donald, and Goofy stood in a circle. "What's goin' on?" Goofy asked nervously.
Emma took a deep breath. "Listen, guys. You're…we're…in a game. It's called Kingdom Hearts," she explained." I'm a big fan of the game, so I know everything that's going to happen. But I think my being here changed the plot."
Robin rolled her eyes. "We already knew that, Baecker."
"Knew what?" Emma asked, coming out of the door. Sora, Donald, and Goofy were behind her.
"But…but…" Robin stared at them, then at the scene before her. "…but…"
"It may take a while, but I have to do some tests," the other Emma announced. "I may be able to decide what happens in some cases." She looked sternly at the other Sora, Donald, and Goofy. "But you guys have to back me up. You saw me…I can only destroy Shadows."
Kairi giggled. "There was a time when Emma could only destroy Shadows?"
Emma sighed happily. "I know what's going on…this is when I first came into the game. Well, after the stuff at Deep Jungle."
"Wait…so this is what happened in the changed game?" Bernie chuckled. "At least I get to see what happened."
Sora shuddered. "I don't want to relive Monstro…that was scary."
"Agreed," Riku added.
"What happened?" Jake asked.
Goofy patted Jake's head. "You'll see."
Jake looked indignant. "Why is everyone touching my head today?"
… … …
"How'd we skip ta here?" Robin asked.
The Juu Senshi, Lyze, Silke, and Axel were standing in the desert town of Agrabah. "That was Traverse Town Keyhole," Emma explained. "Not the normal Traverse Town."
"Cut-scene time." Axel held out a Martial Wakening 7 card. "This should go pretty quickly.
… … …
"AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGH!" The Emma from the past fell through a hole in the ceiling. She got up slowly, rubbing her butt. "Ow…"
Eclipse covered his mouth, trying not to laugh. "This fun to watch," he decided.
The present Emma glared at him. "I'll let that slide 'cause you're cute," she mumbled under her breath.
"She's here," Past Donald announced, laughing.
Past Sora grinned. "Emma!" he called. "What's the plan?"
Jake looked up at the giant red bulk that was Genie Jafar. "Wow!"
"A plan that Baby Baecker made? I gotta see this," Robin laughed.
Past Emma was hopping up and down, waving the boss's lamp around. "HEY! JAFAR! I GOT YOUR LAMP!"
"NO! YOU CANNOT DO THIS TO ME!" Jafar roared. Present Emma was mouthing everything that was going on.
"Aw yeah, I can!" both Past and Present Emma cheered.
Dia rubbed her hands together. "A magic lamp…I would've wished for something awesome, like…a car! Or…trillions of dollars! Or…"
"I wish for a sandwich," Past Emma announced.
The Juu Senshi, the two of the Rei no Aku Daimyos, Axel, Past Sora, Past Donald, Past Goofy, and Past Aladdin stared blankly. Present Emma grinned nervously.
"MAKE WITH THE SANDWICH, GENIE-BOY!" Past Emma ordered. A sandwich appeared in her hand. "Thank you," she said sweetly.
Past Donald raised an eyebrow. "Uh…Emma?"
"I wish for a backpack to put the sandwich in," she continued.
Jafar hit himself in the head. "She is eminently stupid…" he growled.
"AND FOR MY THIRD WISH!" Past Emma interrupted, with Present Emma mimicking her. "I WISH YOU WERE A HARMLESS BUNNY FOR ALL ETERNITY!"
Jafar said something, but nobody could hear it; everyone in the present, even Emma, was laughing hysterically.
Past Sora was laughing too. "Way to go! So, what do we do now?"
"Remember I told you that you had to blitz?" Past Emma reminded him.
"I get it." Sora grinned evilly.
Past Emma took out the Silver Hammer, her weapon at the time. "FORE!" she called. Bunny Jafar whizzed towards Sora, who leapt into the air and kicked him into the lava, Blitzball style.
"Ouch. That's gotta hurt," Sora remarked with a wince.
"He's sizzling." Aladdin glanced over the edge of the platform.
Axel had his mouth stuffed in his cloak, probably to hide his laughter. "Let's go to the next floor."
… … …
Sora sighed. "I hate this part…" Riku scrunched up his shoulders pitifully. Emma nodded sadly.
"Well, well, well. Playing with rocks, huh, girl?"
Past Riku stood in Monstro's stomach. "My name's Emma," she mumbled from the floor.
"Oh, no…" Dia pursed her lips together. "…Emma told me this story before."
"Is it really that sad?" Eclipse asked. Dia shushed him.
Past Emma glared. "Leave me alone. You guys are probably the ones who got me into the game, so why do you want to take me out?"
"Wrong," Past Riku replied. "Wrong. We only let you talk to them. You came yourself. The idea was to pinpoint an obsessed, insecure player and let them talk to Sora. When they got to do that, Kingdom Hearts would stop being a game. The best part of the plan is that if Sora faints, he dies. Forever." Present Sora shuddered.
Past Emma shuddered. "Can he die even now?" she asked nervously.
Past Riku took great pride in his answer. "Yes." He smirked. "That benefits me, too, not just Maleficent; Sora and me, we're rivals. Not friends anymore. When Sora dies…well, I'll get Kairi."
Kairi twitched. "You WHAT?" she hissed at Present Riku, who put his hands defensively in the air.
"You're stupid," Past Emma replied shakily. "I won't let Sora, Donald, or Goofy die." She thought for a moment. "Well, maybe Donald." Donald glared at both Past and Present Emma. "No, I'll make sure they all live."
Bernie watched the scene intently. "I really don't like where this is going…"
"You won't," Present Riku confirmed stiffly.
Past Emma stood up slowly. "I can't believe it. You, Riku, Sora's best friend, want him to die." A familiar blue mist appeared, making Present Riku shiver. "Friends want the best for their friends."
"I'm not in the mood to hear another speech about the heart," Past Riku groaned.
"But it's true!" Past Emma yelled.
Past Riku clenched his fists. "I'VE HAD ENOUGH!" he snarled. "I'M GOING TO DESTROY YOU!"
Most of the viewers who didn't know what happened cringed or shut their eyes. A crashing sound made Jake whimper loudly. "I don't think so." Past Emma was gripping the Blizzard Stone. An icicle shot up, and the Soul Eater was frozen inside it. "You may be Sora's friend, but you're sure not acting like it." Her voice had turned vicious and cold. "I guess I'll have to kill you, then."
At this last line, a few members of Juu Senshi glanced at Present Emma. A tear rolled down her cheek. "Emma?" Lyze murmured, lightly shaking the other elementalist's shoulder. "You okay?" Emma sniffled and nodded. Beside her, Present Riku's eyes were also getting a little watery.
"Shut up!" Past Riku reached for the Silver Hammer, then snapped it on his knee. "Now what're you going to do?"
Past Emma began her transformation. "I'm going to do this," she announced. Her eyes and shirt became pastel blue. "YUKI NAIFU!" Present Emma was still crying, periodically wiping her eyes. Ten-foot-tall icicles materialized around her. Past Emma jumped and perched herself on top of the icicle closest to Riku. "Never seen anything like this, huh, Dark Boy?" she sneered.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Past Riku yelled, stumbled backwards.
Past Emma jumped down, pointing a small icicle at Past Riku. "Killing you," she announced casually.
Past Riku's eyes widened, and his fear disintegrated. He started laughing hysterically. "With…with THAT?"
Past Emma tapped the icicle against her arm disapprovingly. "You underestimate me." She glanced at one of the many 'platforms' in Monstro's stomach, and smashed the icicle on it. Beneath the crumbling ice was a real knife.
Past Riku tripped over his own feet trying to get away. "BUT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE BRAINY WEAKLING!"
"Hmm." Past Emma narrowed her eyes. "Too bad, so sad, don't care." She bent down and caught Past Riku's foot, pinning him to the ground, her knife flying swiftly to his throat.
"EMMA!" Past Sora and the others appeared behind her. "STOP IT!" He grabbed Past Emma's shoulders, pulling her off the frightened Past Riku. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
Past Emma looked a little annoyed at Past Sora's interference. "His intent was to kill me," she stated. "I simply turned the tables."
Shaking, Past Sora lifted the Three Wishes Keyblade. "Emma…I'm really sorry about this…" He brought it down on her head.
"Ugh…" Past Emma fell on the ground. Her shirt and eyes returned to normal.
Past Riku jerked back as his attacker fell near him. "Get that…thing away from me!" He scrambled to his feet, and sprinted away. "Maleficent'll go berserk…" he called over his shoulder. "…but I'm going before that thing tries to kill me again!"
Axel faced the Juu Senshi and everyone else on his tour. "I think…we've seen enough," he decided. "Come on." He walked towards the stairs to the 4th floor.
Emma was still crying softly. Riku, who had gotten over his shock, mentally grinned. This is my chance to make Emma like me again! Sure, it's a dirty trick, but…
"It's okay, Emma. You probably didn't mean it…it was that stone." Riku stared. Eclipse had his hand on Emma's shoulder. "Don't beat yourself up about it. Riku's not upset, is he?"
Riku, for Emma's sake, stopped glaring at the Nekoshu boy and smiled genuinely at Emma. Emma nodded. "I guess you're right…still…what I did was horrible. I'm sorry, Riku."
"Don't be," he assured her. "You never actually hurt me. Besides, I tried to hurt you too. We're even!" Riku nodded to confirm his statement.
Emma slowly smiled back. "Okay."
"Move it along!" Axel called from the doorway. "We have a castle to go through!"
Riku grunted. "He thinks he's all that, with his fire power and his…" A pained look crossed his face. Eclipse and Emma were walking in front of him to rejoin the others, and Eclipse had his arm wrapped around Emma's shoulders. "…nevermind." Eclipse glanced back at Riku, giving him a grim smile.
Steaming, Riku glared at him again. I know you can read my thoughts, you jerk. Yeah, it's me, the guy who's always glaring at the back of your head. And you know perfectly why, don't you? Well, you know what? You want Emma? You can HAVE her.
Eclipse looked at Riku one last time, still smirking. Wouldn't have it any other way.
… … …
FG: That was Chapter 14! It was a big pain to type…then I rediscovered the magic that is copy-and-paste.
Everyone else: (sweatdrop)
Sora: You just typed an emotional Eclipse x Emma x Riku part, and you're complaining about the cut-scenes?
FG: …yeah, pretty much.
-+Flame of Darkness+- : Whoo! Eclipse x Emma! (holds up a sign reading 'Eclipse & Emma 4Ever')
Everyone else: (stares)
Neassa: HEY! (shoves -+Flame of Darkness+- out of the way) This is MY territory! (resumes her 'Disco Inferno' dance, flamethrower and all)
Axel: I challenge you to a fire match!
Neassa: Deal!
Axel: (takes out his giant fire chakrams)
Neassa: (takes out flamethrower)
Men in white coats: It's time for your medicine, Valerie!
Neassa: (drops flamethrower) YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME, COPPERS! MWAHAHAHAHA! (runs off-screen)
White Coat Dude: Send in the reinforcements!
S.W.A.T. Members: Hut, hut, hut, hut, hut! (chase after Neassa with tasers)
Neassa: Come an' get me! (runs back in wearing a bunny suit and frilly underwear over her head)
White Coat Dude: CHARGE!
Neassa: (does a war cry, then runs away again)
Robin: (cracks up, then stops) Wait…stay away from me!
S.W.A.T. Members: (trample Robin)
FG: Um…FG out, yo… (edges away)