Chapter 19

Frank's POV

"Hi Edna, did Stephanie call you too?"

"Yes, she did. I wonder what happened. She sounded lost."

"I feel the same way. I know she was going out last night with John and the men from her job. Do you think something could have happened?" Edna asked, concern evident in her voice.

"Do you know if Carlos went out with them?"

"I don't think so. Steph said that he never goes."

There was a pregnant pause in the conversation before Edna replied, "there's always a first."

"I'll pick you up in thirty."

"I'll be ready. Thanks, Frank."

"Bye, Edna."

Edna Mazur may be my mother-in-law, but we get along much better than we do with her daughter, Ellen. While I was married, things were contentious between us. It was only when Ellen decided to ship herself off to California with Valerie while leaving Stephanie behind high and dry that we actually started to see eye to eye. We were united in our support for Stephanie, who, it turns out, is stronger than we both thought.

This morning, I woke early like I always do. I made myself a cup of coffee, then showered, shaved, and dressed. I went to the bakery to get a dozen donuts. I had one for breakfast with my second and last cup of coffee for the day, at least my final caffeinated cup. I finished reading the paper and completed the Sunday crossword puzzle when Stephanie called. She asked me to pick up Edna to bring her to her house at 12:30. She said she needed our advice. Now, Stephanie is an independent woman. She has spent the last ten years living her life by her own rules, making decisions that she felt were in her best interest. Of course, Edna and I gave her our opinions, but Stephanie never sought them out. The only time when she openly came to me for advice was when she was buying her house and her cars. For that, she wanted a man's opinion, and I guided her, as a proper father should.

When I first found out she was pregnant, I was livid. I wasn't mad at her because she had sex. I know that most young people nowadays are not virgins on their wedding day. Hell, I had definitely sowed my seeds; why should I expect her to be different? I was angry because I felt that she would be forced into a life that she didn't want nor deserve. My little girl was meant to fly, to be more than a housewife and mother. At first, I thought that her slimy boyfriend, who my ex loved, was the father. But Dickie Orr, thank God, wasn't. Instead, Stephanie told us how she went to Miami on spring break with her girlfriends. She told me about Carlos, how he was in the Army, with aspirations of becoming a Ranger. When she spoke of him, her whole demeanor changed. Her face lit up with excitement, and I could tell that he meant a lot to her. But then, about a month later, she came to me crying, when she couldn't contact him. She tried for her entire pregnancy to find Carlos. I even called a few of my contacts, but since she didn't know his first name (apparently Carlos is his middle name), we kept hitting dead ends. Who knew there were fifteen different Manosos in the Army, and five of them had 'C' for their middle initial?

That was the breaking point for Ellen. Once it was clear that Stephanie would be a single, unwed mother to fatherless children, she was done with her. She managed to bully Stephanie into marrying that good for nothing Richard Orr, so the neighbors wouldn't talk. The only reason Orr agreed to it was that it raised his reputation in the Burg. Many of our 'friends' called him a saint for agreeing to raise another man's children. For the first two years of the twin's lives, Ellen was hardly present. She mostly ignored them, never doting on them the way grandmothers typically do. It was only when she was out in public did she put on the show that she loved her grandchildren. To her, they were bastard children and not worth her time or effort. When Valerie called, begging for help, I encouraged Ellen to go to California. We were basically divorced already, not talking, not sleeping in the same bed, not eating together. The only thing we did was live together. From Ellen's point of view, we kept up the appearance of a happy marriage. For me, it was an economically sound decision.

I didn't have to pay rent or pay alimony to Ellen. Once it was apparent that Ellen was staying with Valerie, we filed for divorce. That is why I sold our house. We split the money earned from the sale, and we split the money in our savings account. I was finally done with Ellen, and I had money to help Stephanie move out of her two-bedroom apartment that she acquired after divorcing Orr into her modest home. She offered to let me live with her, and I did, for the first year, but soon, I realized that Stephanie needed to be on her own. Don't get me wrong, I am there for her whenever she needs me, but for the sake of her little family, she needed to learn how to do things without me hovering.

My pumpkin did fly. Getting the job at Dr. Mitchell's was a blessing in disguise. It pushed her to get her physical therapy certification and her massage therapy licenses. Those, in turn, gave her the money she needed to live her life. I am so proud of how far she has come. I only hope that she can find her life partner. She is not getting any younger, and I know, deep down, that my daughter wants to have more children. I don't want to see her alone. In about twelve years, the twins will be on their own, and my daughter will be all alone at forty-two.

I glance at the clock, seeing that it's time to leave to pick up Edna. I gather my keys, my wallet, and the box of donuts. I lock my apartment door and get on the elevator.

"Good afternoon, Mrs. Bestler."

"Good afternoon, Mr. Plum. Heading off to see those darling grandchildren?"

"Yes. I can't wait to spend some time with the twins. They grow so fast that I cherish every moment."

"I know. I remember those days well. Enjoy your afternoon."

"You too," I reply. I exit the building, walking to my Mercury Grand Marquis. It is a seven-year-old model that looks as if it just rolled off the lot. I wipe away a minute smudge on the rear passenger door before placing the donuts on the floor of the backseat. I settle in, buckling my seat belt. I drive to Edna's in ten minutes and help the old bat into the car. Thankfully, she dressed in a tasteful outfit that I think is called a tracksuit. This one is a pale blue, which is a change from the bright yellow and pink she typically wears. We drive in silence to Stephanie's house, arriving a couple of minutes early.

When the door opens, I can feel Stephanie's nervous energy. Whatever she wants to talk to us about is more than likely positive, but she is scared. I wonder if it has something to do with Carlos. After exchanging pleasantries, we sit around the comfortable kitchen table. Steph's table is a round wooden table the easily sits four. She uses this table for meals when it's just her and the kids. When my ex-mother-in-law and I come over, we use the dining room. Stephanie has the coffee made and places the donuts in the center of the table.

"What's wrong, Pumpkin. Why are you so jittery?" I ask when she sits down.

"I broke up with John last night."

"Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry. I know he was a good man. He does love you." Edna said.

"That's the problem, though."

"What do you mean?" I ask my youngest daughter.

"Well, he loves me, but I don't love him, at least not as I should. It is something that I've known for a few months, but I was afraid to admit it."

"Why are you afraid?"

"Because then that means that I have to admit that I love Carlos."

I look at Edna, and she looks back at me. We both know there is more to this story. "I think you need to start at the beginning. What happened?"

Steph sighs, stirring her coffee to keep her hands busy. "You know that last night was Lester, one of the guys I work with, birthday. Lester is Carlos' cousin. John picked me up, and we went together to the new club that opened up. Things were great. We had the perfect spot in the VIP section since Rangeman does the security for the place. We were with friends. John and I danced a lot. Then, we went back to our section to chat. Some Latin songs came on, and Lester asked me to dance with him. We did and were having a blast. But then Carlos cut in."

She sighs again, looking at her mug while holding it with both of her hands. "When we started to dance, it felt like we were transported back to that first night we met. I swear, everyone else faded away, and it was only the two of us in the club. When the song changed, we danced to another, slower, more sensual tune. For me, there was no one but Carlos, and I think he felt the same way. We were so lost in the moment that when the number ended, we kissed, I mean, really kissed. It seems that almost everyone in the club stopped dancing to watch us, and when we kissed, one of the guys whistled, which broke us apart and spun us both back to reality. Part of me thinks that Carlos knew what he was doing, but he seemed mildly embarrassed.

"John knew, right then, that there was no future for us. What's scaring me, though, is that I'm not even upset that we're broken up. I mean, I'm upset that I embarrassed him in front of our co-workers and everyone in that club, but I'm not sad that we aren't together. Isn't that wrong of me?"

Now it's my turn to sigh. I see Edna sending me a knowing look. It's time to Stephanie my secret. Ellen doesn't even know this; in fact, Edna is the only one who does. Maybe if I tell Stephanie, it will stop her from making the same mistake I did.

"Pumpkin, how do you feel about Carlos?"

She looks at me with tears in her eyes, threatening to fall. "I think, no, I know I've been in love with him since the moment we met. Whenever he is near me, I feel safe and treasured. I typically hate it when a man puts his hand on my back when we walk because I feel like they are pushing me. But when Carlos does it, I melt into him. When he's here to see the kids, I want to spend time with him and them. Everything is so easy when he's around. Even at work, when we are alone, we tend to gravitate towards each other. He's always pushing a curl behind my ear or finding a reason to touch me. I allow it. Whenever John tried to put his hand on my back, I'd walk faster or step away. It used to bother me when he wanted to sit next to me in a restaurant; I mean, why squeeze together on one side of the table. However, with Carlos, I want to be near him.

"After the club, we came back here. I didn't have my car, so Carlos drove me home. He came in, and we spent the night watching some of the home videos of the twins. At some point, I fell asleep on the couch. Carlos carried me up to my room, then he slept on the couch. This morning, when he woke up, he put the bedding from the couch in the washing machine, made coffee, and had everything cleaned up. We went out to breakfast, and Carlos told me that he wants to be with me. He wants us to be a proper family. But I don't know if I can trust him."

"Pumpkin, I think it's time for me to tell you a story, a personal one. Maybe after you hear what I have to say, you can make a better, more informed decision." I pause. Edna nods, letting me that this is the right thing to do.

"You know that I was in the Army and served in Vietnam. I was there for the last three years of the war, then I was stationed overseas. I was in Germany and met an Italian woman who was going to school there. She was stunning. We met one day when we both tried to get into the same taxi. We realized that the places we were going to were on the same street, so we shared the cab. By the time we got to our destinations, we had made a date for dinner. I fell in love with her almost immediately. I was still enlisted and running special ops. After a year, I was sent on a mission. I promised her that when I was finished, I'd join her, wherever she was. She said she was going to move home, back to Italy, when she finished school. Since she was almost done, I figured that was the case.

"I was gone for eight months. I thought of her every day. She consumed my thoughts. Finally, the mission was over, we met our objective. I was in D.C. for the debrief when I got word that my father, your grandfather, had a stroke. I immediately flew home to help your grandmother. I wrote to my love, telling her of the situation. She assured me she would wait and told me to stay with my family. Six months later, your grandfather died. I had planned on leaving for Italy the day after his death, but I met a lovely young woman while he was in the hospital. I was attracted to her, and she to me, even though she was almost ten years my junior. We went out for coffee a few times, then dinner, and pretty soon the movies. We somehow started to date. When my father died, I was afraid to give up my new girl for someone I wasn't sure I was still in love with. After all, we haven't seen each other in over a year.

"So, I decided to stay in Trenton. I wrote her, telling her my mother needed me and I couldn't move to Italy at this time. She understood, saying she was dating a man from her village, and things were promising. We kept in touch for about a year, until we both married. Then we decided it was best not to communicate anymore. Her name was Stefania."

I saw Stephanie's head jerk up. "Wait, I was named after your ex-girlfriend? Not grandpa?"

"Yes, Pumpkin. Your mother didn't know about Stefania, or I'm sure she wouldn't have allowed you to be named Stephanie. I never told her."

"Why are you telling me all this now, though?"

"Because I don't want you to make the same mistake I did. Look, Pumpkin, you are at a fork in the road. You can choose to go right, to John. John is a good man who is honorable, loving, and caring. He loves you, I'm sure of that. He would make a wonderful step-father to the kids. You would be happy, and you would live a life of comfort. I don't see him forcing you to be a Burg woman. However, I'm afraid, if you choose that path, one day you'll wake up and realize that you don't love John and that you no longer have anything in common. I think you already realize that.

"The other option is to take the left path, the one to Carlos. He is also a terrific person. He has shown that he loves his children and that he loves you. He respects your wishes and your boundaries. He doesn't push you to do what you don't want, and he discusses his thoughts, as they pertain to your children, with you, while allowing you to make the final decision. You clearly love him. I can see that. Whenever he is here, you are with him and the kids. You want to spend time with him. You crave his touch as much as he wants to touch you. What you have together is rare. It's a gem, a treasure, don't let it slip away. Is it possible that in a month, a year, or 20 years from now that you could be miserable? Of course, but is the possibility of experiencing true love worth throwing away because of fear?"

I can see Stephanie is absorbing what I'm telling her. I believe that her mind is already made up and has been since last night, if not earlier. She needs our approval and our support; no thanks to Ellen.

"Dad, did you love mom?"

"Yes, Pumpkin, I did. Never like I loved Stefania. That was all-consuming, but I was in love with your mother. When she was young, she was so different than how you know her. She was vibrant, outgoing, and adventurous, pushing boundaries, and doing scandalous things. She had a love of life. Then, we got married. We lived in an apartment for the first two years, which was perfect. She decided to stay home, wanting to live the traditional life. I was okay with it since I earned enough money in the post office while still running some ops to support us. Then, when she was pregnant with Valerie, we brought our house. That was the turning point. Once she had a home, she felt the need to be the perfect housewife. She started to obsess over the appearance of the windows, the floor, and the sheets. Valerie was a colicky baby, which further stressed your mother because she had to work extra hard to be perfect.

"Then you came along. You were the perfect baby. Quite, a great sleeper and eater. Your mother was finally able to wield some control over Val. She spent a lot of time with Val, trying to make her the perfect child that you were naturally. Since she worked so hard on your sister, she started to ignore you. That's when you began to act out. You are so like your mother, believe it or not. Val is the Stepford version of Ellen, but you are her true spirit.

"I never knew what Joe Morelli did to you in his father's garage. In fact, I didn't know about the Tasty Pastry incident until the guys at the club told me about the poems. It was then that I realized I didn't know your mother anymore. When you came to us to tell us you were pregnant, I was disappointed. Any father would be. No one wants to think of his little girl being taken advantage of. But, as you told your mother about the babies' father, I knew you loved him, that it wasn't a fling. That night, after you left, your mother was ready to call the doctor to schedule you for an abortion. I put my foot down and told her that would never happen.

"That was when I knew our marriage was truly over. I know that your mother is obsessed with her standing in the Burg. A divorce, in her words, would ruin Val and prevent you from getting a husband. So, I stayed. Your mother moving to California to help Valerie was the best thing that ever happened to me. It gave me freedom."

"Stephanie, what do you want to do?" Edna asked.

"I want to be with Carlos, but I'm afraid the fantasy will be better than reality."

"The only way to find out is to bite the bullet. Don't make your father's mistake. Be with Carlos. If it doesn't work out, at least you'll have no regrets."

"But what happens if John is the man I'm supposed to be with?"

"Then God will find a way to bring you together," I reply.

"Thank you! I feel much better now."

"What time are the terrors coming home?"

"Dad! They're not terrors. Mary Lou is dropping them off at four. I was supposed to pick them up at 3, but Mar agreed to keep them a little longer, given my dilemma."

"Let's get dinner started, Stephanie."

"Okay, Grandma."

I hug my daughter then leave the women alone in the kitchen to prepare dinner. I venture into the living room to watch television. I guess it's time to call a few people I know and learn more about Carlos "Ranger" Manoso.