Hardcore Smallville fan alert!

You'll doubtlessly notice I mention a few characters in the Smallville part of this chapter that AREN'T part of the official show canon but ARE in the overall Superman canon.

I'm sorry, but I just watched the preview for "Superman Returns", and then watched the original Superman movie and I couldn't resist.

And it IS an "alternate universe" anyway. Yeah…that's it.

We're Not In Kansas Anymore

Chapter 3

"Save Me"

A long black limousine pulled up at the secret work site that had been prepared deep within the marshland jokingly called "Slaughter Swamp" by the people of nearby Smallville. Of course no one ever came out here because it was too dangerous, which is what made it perfect for the use the land was about to be put to.

A husky crew leader came up to the limo as the driver, a tall, statuesque young woman in a chauffeur's outfit got out of the car and came around to the passenger door without so much as acknowledging the man's presence. Without a word she opened the door, and out stepped the man who owned the car, the worksite, and everyone working on it.

"Alright Corben," said Lionel Luthor as he scowled at the crew leader, "what is so important that you had to drag me out here into this open cesspool?"

"Well, Mr. Luthor," stammered Roger Corben, a usually tough man who had headed more than a few of the work crews for Luthor's less than above board projects, "I think you better take a look for yourself.'

"Of course you do, you moron," said Lionel, "that's why I'm here."

"Stay here with the car, Mercy," Lionel said to the driver, "and if Miss Tessmocker calls tell her I will be back directly."

The two men made their way towards the huge pit that was being dug into the heart of the swamp, and Lionel stopped to look down into it.

"What is that?" he asked, barely able to make out a strange sight in the loam and peat of the drained bog.

"It's a body sir," said Corben, "a human body."

"Impossible," said Lionel, his curiosity overtaking his anger, "that thing must be…"

"Seven feet, four inches tall," said Corben, "I measured him myself. And from the build I'd guess he weighs over six hundred pounds"

"So it IS a man?"

"Not just any man, Mr. Luthor," said Corben as he felt a chill crawl up his spine, "that's the legendary Solomon Grundy."

"Hey Warren," said Clark as he sat his lunch tray down at the table directly across from Warren Peace, who had been reading and now looked up at Clark like he had just insulted him.

"What about yesterday made you think it was okay to sit here?" he growled.

"Come on," grinned Clark, noticing that Warren's black eye was nearly gone. Apparently he was as fast a healer as Clark, whose swollen lip was a shadow of its former glory.

"Nobody sits here but me," Warren said, though he made no move to try to make Clark leave.

"Why? It looks like there's plenty of room."

Warren looked up at Clark like he had said something dirty in a foreign language.

"What is it with you, farm boy? Yesterday I tried to fry you not ten feet from here and now your acting like it never happened."

"Oh it happened," grinned Clark, "and I've got the month long grounding to go with it once I got home and had to explain to my folks what happened."

"Grounded. You. That's a joke."

"No joke. Nothing for me the next four weeks but school and chores at home. No TV, music, none of it. Just me and the books. Speaking of which, what are you reading?"

"None of your business," said Warren, trying to cover his book, but it was no good. Clark had already used his x-ray vision to get a quick look at the cover.

"Romeo and Juliet?" said Clark, trying not to laugh at the thought of the big bruiser actually getting into one of the greatest romances of all time.

"Shut up," snarled Warren, "I don't want anyone to hear you."

"Ahem…sorry," said Clark, quieting down but still grinning until he remembered something. "You're going to try out for the play, aren't you? I know auditions are next week."

"So what," said Warren, "maybe I'm just doing it to scare everybody and they'll cancel it."

"This isn't an episode of Scooby-Doo where someone puts on a rubber mask to scare everyone and stop the show," said Clark, "I don't think they can keep you from auditioning if you want to anyway."

"Let'em try," said Warren.

"So," said Clark, "what part are you going for?"

"Rmmo," mumbled Warren.

"Excuse me," said Clark, starting to enjoy his new friend's squirming, "what was that?"

"Romeo," said Warren, his dark face suddenly taking on a deep blush as he finally admitted something he had held to his heart for so long to someone else.

"That's cool," said Clark, "I hope you get it."

"That's it?" asked Warren, "you're not going to make fun of me like…like the others would?"

"Why would I," said Clark, finally starting to eat his lunch, "if it's what you want to do, don't let anybody stop you. I think you'd be great."

"Hi Clark," said Layla, coming up to the table and sitting down next to him without even noticing the glare Warren shot in her direction.

"Hi Layla," grinned Clark, "you've met Warren?"

"Yeah," said Layla, looking shyly at Warren like she wasn't sure what to do, "hi."

"This is MY table…" started Warren.

"And he's always got room for his friends," Clark finished for him, indicating that included Layla.

"You two are…friends?" Layla looked surprised.

"We are?" Warren looked even more surprised.

"Sure," said Clark, "why not?"

"Would you explain to this thick-headed hick that we are NOT friends?" Warren said to Layla.

"I don't know," said Layla, "he's been sitting here talking to you for five minutes, and I understand that's a school record for ANYBODY being near you since…forever."

Warren growled and rolled his eyes as he returned to his book, trying to ignore the two intruders.

"So what's up?" Clark asked Layla.

"I just wanted to tell you…"

"Clark, help!"

Clark's head snapped up as he saw Ethan standing in the entrance to the cafeteria just as what looked like a long black and white striped snake with a hand for a head reached in and grabbed the boy, yanking him away.

"Great," said Clark, "those two again. Sorry Layla."

Clark was off in a blur, leaving Layla sitting across from the brooding Warren. The silence between them was like a solid wall for several moments as Layla unwrapped the lunch she brought.

"Cheese cube?" she asked, offering Warren some of her lunch.

"He sure is," muttered Warren, and then shot Layla a quick smile that made her giggle.

Clark shot down the hallway, avoiding any potential collision with anyone as he rounded the corner and saw Lash and Speed finish stuffing Ethan into a locker. Clark rolled his eyes and wondered where Wally was; the super fast redhead had made it his personal mission to foil Lash and Speed at every turn, and had been driving them crazy for days. He then realized Wally was still in class and the two thugs had finally figured out his schedule so they could coincide it with any trouble they caused.

"Come on guys," said Clark, approaching them slowly but ready for trouble, "let him out."

Speed and Lash looked at each other as if they knew the jig was up, and opened the door so Ethan could fall out. Clark helped him to his feet, and patted his friend on the back.

Clark then noticed Speed and Lash were not moving from in front of two other lockers, and a quick scan with his x-ray vision revealed why.

"The other two," said Clark, feeling like he was talking to a couple of five year olds instead of high school seniors.

Speed and Lash made sour faces and stepped out of the way as Clark opened the first locker to release Zach, who was glowing in the dark locker, and then the other victim, Will Stronghold.

"Come on guys," said Clark to his embarrassed friends, "let's go get some lunch."

"You just think you're all big and bad, don't you farm boy?" sneered Lash.

"You better watch it dude," piped in Zach, "you remember what my man here did to Warren yesterday."

"YOU better watch it hillbilly," said Speed as he pointed at Clark, "that big mouth is going to get you in trouble."

"Yeah? How about we settle this once and for all in p.e?" replied Zach. "Clark takes you on in Save the Citizen, and if he wins you lay off ALL the sidekicks the rest of the year, and if he loses, you get to dunk Ethan's head in the toilet EVERY DAY until graduation."

"Yeah," said Ethan, "Wait…huh?"

"Guys," said Will, "no freshman has EVER won Save the Citizen, and these two are the champs."

"Oh, trying to back down huh, hayseed?" said Lash.

Clark was amazed that he had gotten into this conversation and not once had he said a word. But if there was any way to stop the bullying, he was up for it.

"You're on," he said, staring the two thugs down, "see you there."

The two sneered and stalked off as Clark watched them leave.

"I've just got one question," said Clark.

"What's that?" asked Ethan.

"What's "Save the Citizen"?"

Lionel Luthor, for one of the few times in his life, was impressed. Before him lay the preserved body of one of…if not the most…famous serial killers to ever terrorize the Midwest. Solomon Grundy had been a literal monster of a man, a Goliath that had terrorized the entire state of Kansas for most of the 1950s as he brutalized and killed anyone he wished. He had finally been captured alive and tried for his crimes, but the night he was to be executed via the electric chair, he managed to break out of prison and eluded his pursuers by disappearing into the depths of Slaughter Swamp, never to be seen again. It was now obvious that Grundy had met his well-earned end in the quicksand and peat bogs of the swamp, where his pale white corpse was now seen for the first time in decades.

"So, Mr. Luthor," said Corben, "what do you want us to do with him?"

"Hmm, interesting," said Lionel, sarcasm creeping into his voice, "what do YOU propose we do?"

"Well sir," said Corben, "if it IS Grundy, I'm sure the authorities would want to know. Maybe we could take him in and turn him over to them…maybe see if that reward for him is still good after all these years…it was "dead or alive" you know.'

"An excellent idea," said Lionel, "let's just bring this whole scheduled project to a stop, load that moldering mummy onto the back of a flatbed truck and drive it right down main street into Smallville with our horns blaring. And once we get to the town square I can announce over a bullhorn how we found the body of a legendary serial killer while digging in the middle of federal wetlands TO BUILD AN ILLEGAL TOXIC WASTE DUMP!"

It was when Lionel's face turned red as a ripe tomato and he started yelling that Corben realized that maybe his own idea hadn't been such a good one after all.

"Take that cursed thing out of here and…I don't know…weigh it down and dump it into the middle of Crater Lake or something. Just get it out of here NOW."

Corben could only nod his head in agreement, and meekly followed his boss back to his car.

"And I thought that fat kid Otis that Lex has run errands for him was an idiot," Lionel grumbled to himself.

Clark got a literal crash course in what the game of Save the Citizen was about as he sat with the entire student body in the bleachers of the gym. It seemed it was an internal competition between teams of students to learn teamwork and cooperation and prove who was a better hero or, in the case of Lash and Speed, the better villain. Clark had never heard of it before as he had other things to think about and had totally overlooked the sign-up sheets that had been posted all over school. Now he was entered into the tournament that had just started, and he didn't even have a partner.

"Jones and Sanchez," Coach Boomer addressed the latest losing team, "your citizen has been mulched because you have failed to defeat your villains. You lose, now hit the showers."

He then turned his attention to the two thugs, who were in their regulation red padded uniforms as they high-fived each other after another victory.

"Okay you two, which do you want to be, heroes or villains?"

"Villains, of course," laughed Speed like it was a stupid question.

"Big surprise," Boomer muttered to himself, "and who do you want to face next?"

"We want Kent," sneered Lash, pointing at Clark, who didn't blink.

"Kent isn't signed up," said Boomer, looking up towards Clark "you want in on this?"

"I do sir," said Clark, standing up.

"Well, you need a partner," said Boomer, "you got anybody in mind?"

Nearly everybody looked at Wally, as they knew he'd love a chance to take down the two bullies once and for all. But Clark and Wally had talked earlier, and they agreed that somebody else needed to get a chance to let off some steam.

Clark spotted who he wanted sitting off in the stands by himself.

"Hey Warren," Clark called to him, "you want in on this?"

There was no reaction for several moments, and then Warren Peace did the scariest thing anyone had ever seen him do.

He looked up.

And he grinned.

"I'm in," he said.

A few minutes later Clark and Warren entered the arena in their own blue costumes, and both felt a little embarrassed being seen by the other kids in the tight outfits. They both blushed when several of the girls started whistling at them, and Clark noticed his friends all sitting together cheering him and Warren on. Magenta was whistling the loudest, and Layla was giggling behind her hand, but he wasn't sure if she was laughing at them or liking what she was seeing.

"Hey," Warren warned Clark, "get your head into the game!"

Clark nodded that he understood and was as ready as he could be.

"Ready…" said Coach Boomer, "BEGIN!"

With that Lash stretched out his arm and grabbed a nearby prop lamppost so Speed could use it to slingshot himself at their opponents, bouncing back and forth as he ricocheted himself off the walls to confuse them.

Not that it worked with Clark. He also took off at super speed, and was able to keep up with Speed. He even reached out and grabbed Speed by the back of his shirt and suddenly stopped, using his strength to pull Speed around and send him flying out of control to impact with the wall.

Lash had reached out and wrapped his arms around Warren like a python, and Warren looked at Lash with total disdain. He then burst into flames, making Lash yell in pain as he pulled his arms back.

Lash yelled, "foul" at Coach Boomer, who just laughed at him and was enjoying the show.

Clark started heading for the "citizen", but Speed tackled him from behind.

"Not so fast, pretty boy," growled Speed, who started throwing super fast punches which Clark was dodging just as fast. All the audience saw were two red and blue blurs, unaware that a thousand dodged punches were thrown in less that five seconds.

Clark kept dodging, as he didn't want Speed to accidentally injure his hands hitting him because of his invulnerability. He then realized that he was doing what Speed wanted; there was a time limit to the game, and all the "villains" had to do was keep the "heroes" busy until the time ran out. So he simply stopped.

There was a loud cracking sound as Speed punched Clark in the jaw at supersonic speed, and while it stunned Clark for a moment because of the momentum behind it, Speed took worse damage. He was grinning until the pain registered and he saw he had broken the knuckles on his left hand, which was already swelling up.

"Sorry" said Clark, wincing in sympathy at the obvious pain Speed was in.

As Luthor had ordered, the hulking albino body of Solomon Grundy, still in it's dark prisoner clothes, was removed from the pit and put into the back of a small truck where it was wrapped with several feet of chain and had blocks of cement attached to it. It was then driven down to the main road where it reached its final resting place…Crater Lake.

Once they were sure no one was around, Corben had his men back the truck out onto one of the boat piers and had the body, chains and all dumped into an old boat that the local kids used for fishing. The boat was then set adrift and, once it was out far enough, Corben used the rifle he always carried in the back of his pickup to put a couple of holes in the boat's side just below the waterline. In seconds the boat sank without a sign of it having ever been there. With a silent prayer Corben and the men left the scene, totally unseen.

A series of explosions caught Clark's attention as he saw Warren trying to hit the wildly dodging Lash with a barrage of fireballs, and knew he had to help his partner. In a flash he was across the floor and grabbed Lash by his elongated legs, yanking him off his feet.

Clark then turned and saw that, though his hand was broken, Speed could still run, and was doing so in a tight circle around Warren, creating a whirlwind that was sucking the air from him. He was suffocating.

Clark knew he could save his friend, but a quick look at the clock showed time was running out. The sidekicks were depending on him to win, but his friend was in very real danger. Clark then got an idea.

Though they were on the other side of the arena and the "citizen" was between them and him, Clark used his heat vision on Speed's foot. Speed yelled in pain and came to a complete stop, jumping up and down as his foot was on fire. He then looked up in time to see his friend Lash flying at him before the top of his head caught Speed in the chin, cracking him solidly and knocking him out. The impact also knocked Lash unconscious, which was just fine with Clark.

Actually, it was only the top of Lash's body that had hit Speed. His feet were still in Clark's hands, and he had used him like a whip to take out Speed.

The clock was ticking down the precious seconds, and Clark saw Warren recovering.

"Warren," yelled Clark, "catch!"

Once again Lash's limp form was stretched out again, this time to Warren like a living bungee cord. Realizing what he had to do, Warren grabbed Lash just as Clark yanked him back with all his strength, pulling Warren with him.

Flying through the air, Warren has headed for the squawking dummy and, at the last second, grabbed it and landed on his feet on the other side of the pit. The timer then ran out and the horn sounded, but it was too late.

"She's alive!" yelled Boomer, as caught up in the drama as everyone else, "HEROES WIN!"

The place exploded in cheers as all the students surged down the bleachers to swarm the new champions. Warren was at a total loss at how to react as he found himself being congratulated by a swarm of sudden fans. Clark was no better off as this was only the second time he'd fought an opponent in front of a crowd, and the feeling was both elating and humbling. Still, he looked through the crowd until he found the people he had done it for; the sidekicks. He pushed his way through until he could shake hands with Zach and Ethan, and got hugs from Magenta and especially Layla, who also planted a kiss firmly on his cheek. Clark blushed, but he wondered where Will was.

In the dark depths of the lake, the boat and its grisly cargo landed on the bottom, stirring up the silt and sediment. It also stirred up something else.

The boat tilted slightly on the uneven lake floor, and the body of Solomon Grundy rolled partially out to make contact with a strange green glow that was coming from a golf ball sized green crystal that had rested at the bottom of the lake for years, undisturbed until it was uncovered just now. The light continued to bathe the preserved body for hours.

High in the stands, Will Stronghold sat, looking at the spectacle. He was glad for Clark, but he still couldn't understand why someone who was becoming the most popular kid in school was hanging out with a monster like Warren Peace…a monster everyone else had been running from yesterday but were now cheering as well. And all his friends were down there too, even Layla.

"Why the long face?" a melodic voice said to him, and Will saw it was the student body president Gwen Grayson.

"No reason, I guess," said Will, suddenly feeling a strange pang of jealousy as he saw Layla kiss Clark on the cheek. "I just…I don't know…feel left out somehow."

"Why?" asked Gwen, sitting down next to him, "Clark did this for you as well as all the other sidekicks. I thought he was your friend too."

"Yeah," said Will, not very convincingly, "but I should be doing my own fighting. This is twice in two days he's stepped in and saved me from villains. I guess I'm getting a crash course in being a sidekick the hard way."

"Well, don't worry about it," smiled Gwen, putting a hand on Will's shoulder and sending a tingle up his spine that quickly drove away the gloom he was feeling. "I'm sure once everything settles into routine around here everyone will find their right spot…and with the right person."

Gwen gave Will a flashing smile as she stood up and walked down the bleachers to exit the gym. Will watched her as she left, totally unmindful of the Pennys giving an impromptu cheer for Clark and Warren to the approval of the other cheering students.

Back in the locker room, Speed and Lash were sulking and angry at having been beaten. Both were also physically hurt, but their pride was suffering even more.

"Beaten by a freshman and that creep Peace," snarled Lash, rubbing his sore head before slamming his fist into a locker then whining in pain as he realized he had given himself another injury to match the bruises he already had.

"My dad is going to blow a fuse…literally," said Speed, referring to his electrically powered father. He had ice packs on both his left hand and right foot, unable to decide which was hurting worse.

The sound of clapping came from the shadows, and both thugs turned to see Gwen come into the locker room, applauding them. With her was Penny, at least the real one…her clones were the ones now cheering the new champions.

"Hey," said Speed, you can't come in here, this is the BOYS locker room."

"More like the LOSERS locker room, you mean," Penny sniped back.

Both Lash and Speed started to react to that, but one look from Gwen quieted all three of them down.

"Actually," smiled Gwen, "this is the best thing that could have happened to us. Now that everyone has their attention focused on Kent and Peace, no one will really notice as I start my little game with Will."

"Gee," sneered Lash, "I'm SO glad the little princess approves of our getting our butts handed to us."

"But I do," smiled Gwen, "and you should be glad too. Now you know exactly how I've felt all this time…humiliated, laughed at, denied the glory that was rightfully mine. It will make things far more satisfying when we finally get everything together that we need for my plan to work."

"And you're sure you can sucker the Stronghold punk into doing what you want?" asked Speed.

"My dear hyper-kinetically gifted but endocrinal challenged friend," smiled Gwen, striking a "pretty girl" pose, sticking out her lower lip in a pout and fluttering her long eyelashes, "I'm COUNTING on it."

She started laughing. Then so did the other three, though the boys weren't exactly sure why. It just seemed like the thing to do.

Later that night, in the depths of Crater Lake, something began to stir. Something that tore off the heavy chains binding it like they were made of tissue paper and slowly began making its way to the shore. After a while it reached land, where its slow plodding steps came to a halt as it looked into the night and saw the faint distant lights of Smallville. A wicked grin came to its withered lips, revealing the vile brown and black teeth that filled its mouth. It's glowing green eyes narrowed as it thought of all the fun it was going to have while a stiff breeze, the first breaths of autumn, stirred its shaggy white hair.

To be continued.

Next: Warren comes to Smallville for the Fall Festival and meets Lana...but so does Solomon Grundy!