A/N- Back to my usual silliness with a bit of fluff for good measure. This one was written for Live Journal's fma_fic_contest. The prompt was "Characters' traits get flipped." I remembered the disclaimer today. Not mine. Sob. Arakawa's!

xoxoxox

Mustang was beyond annoyed with the little pest. Well, maybe not so little, these days. He wasn't even an alchemist anymore, but he insisted on sticking his nose in alchemist business. Secretly, Mustang was happy to toss ideas back and forth with the older Elric brother. He was the most brilliant alchemist that Roy had ever known with the possible exception of Master Hawkeye, but somehow he managed to make even scientific discourse grating. Of course, if asked, Ed would have said nearly the same about his former commander.

"I don't know why you bother to use a transmutation circle when you don't need one, Colonel Bastard."

"That's 'General,' and yes you do, Former Fullmetal, because not only have I told you, but you have even discussed circle construction with me. You are interested, too. Array-less alchemy is quite convenient, but I don't want to lose my old skills, and I want to continue to improve them."

"Idiot," remarked Ed, even though he had never stopped studying arrays.

The transmutation should have gone smoothly. It was a fairly simple experiment to see if a light material's strength could be enhanced by swapping its crystalline structure with that of a heavier and stronger compound. But Ed was enjoying harassing Mustang by leaning over his shoulder. (Roy was crouching, or that would not have been possible!) And then Ed sneezed himself off balance and fell against Roy. They tumbled in, and the blue light flashed.

"Are you okay, you clumsy little twerp?" Roy wanted Ed to be okay so that he could inflict a world of hurt on the younger man himself.

"You had to transmute as we fell, didn't you?" accused Ed.

"My hands reflexively went down to keep me from face-planting when you pushed me. Shit. There is no part of my body that I'd want switched with yours, shrimp."

"I barely touched you. And I am not short, anymore!"

"Not as short."

Eventually, the men checked themselves over. Nothing appeared to be amiss, so they returned to studying the results of the transmutation on the materials and later, disappointed, made their separate ways home.

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Winry was waiting for Ed in the apartment that Mustang kept reserved for them on-site at Eastern Headquarters. She had begun to cook dinner.

"Do you think that this will go well with that?" he asked, holding forth a dark ruby bottle.

"Wine, Ed? What a nice surprise." Ed was usually more of a beer guy. Winry smiled and kissed him on the cheek.

"Ah, if that is how you demonstrate your appreciation for that minor item, I hope that I earn a kiss over here for these!" He pointed to his lips with one hand as he extended the other with a floral bouquet.

"Oh, Ed!" Winry exclaimed as she threw her arms around him and granted his wish. She loved Ed and knew he loved her, but classical romantic gestures were few and far between with him. His devotion usually had to be inferred. Ed replied with a nibble on her ear lobe.

"Mmmm. I don't know what's gotten into you, but I like it. How was your day?"

"You-know-who was a real pain in the behind, but let's forget about that for now…"

"Forget about what?" Winry giggled as Ed kissed her hand. This new, suave Ed was so… not Ed, but she wasn't going to open a can of worms by pointing this out to the man who was gently pushing her toward the bedroom.

xoxoxox

Riza still marveled at the turn their lives had taken. Who would have thought that they could have found happiness outside of work, let alone together. They usually left the office as a couple, but Roy had wanted to stay late to work on a project that might aid the tribes of nomadic Ishvalans who herded sheep and goats. His transmutation would, he hoped, keep their yurts light enough to carry, but strong enough to withstand the desert sandstorms that had become worse since the war had ruined fields and caused the desert to encroach into previously less harsh areas. He'd wanted Edward to take a look at the array. She giggled a little at what might have transpired between those two. Their respect (and possibly even affection) did seep through, but they were still jarringly volatile with each other. So much alike! She and Winry had traded stories and tips over dealing with their high-strung men.

She and Roy had seemed to have found a way to leave most of the tensions of work behind, and they were even dealing with the disappointment of not (yet, she still hoped) having children. They were grateful (to whatever or whomever) for their much greater-than-expected happiness. Roy liked to putter in the kitchen with her, so she had gathered ingredients but was waiting for him to actually start to cook their dinner.

The door slamming aroused her from a doze. Huh. Weird. Roy stomped into the room.

"How did the experiment go?"

"I could swear that something transferred, but it wasn't the strength against axial or torsional forces on the materials." He punched a sofa cushion as he plopped down. "That dumbass Edward ruined the transmutation."

She sat beside him and rubbed his back. "You'll figure it out. Are you hungry?"

He kissed her. "I'm sorry. Forget about it. I could down a herd of horses! Let's eat."

"I thought that we'd make pasta with smoked salmon and vodka cream sauce."

"Cream sauce? That's like milk." Roy blanched as white as the said dairy products. "Are you trying to kill me?"

"What? You love this recipe? Your temper is a little short, tonight."

"Short? Are you saying that I'm so short that Black Hayate could mistake me for a fire hydrant?"

"Um, Roy, I think that I know what got transmuted…"

xoxoxox

A/N- I hope that you liked it. I think that it liked you. I'm on my knee's begging for reviews. Please? Take care.