Lily awoke the next morning very close to something pleasantly warm she groggily opened her eyes to find an arm placed around her protectively. Great she thought I slept in how in the hell am I to get out of this she made to sit up when she heard James say "I wouldn't do that if I were you."
Your up and I am leaving lily sat up suddenly feeling nauseous immediately throwing up on the floor next to James bed
"Dammit Lily I told you not to do that." James said in a frustrated voice her put on his glasses and grabbed his wand ands practicality shouted "scourgify"
"JAMES HAROLD POTTER WHAT IN THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME LAST NIGHT?" lily looked over at him with hurt in her eyes, then it came back to her like she was punched in the stomach. She had been kissing him when she passed out. "You weren't drunk," she said in barely a whisper. "You tricked me."
"Lily please understand I have my reasons I am afraid I have bad news for you my dear. Your parents…umm…their…umm. Well lily I really don't know how to tell you this…"
"Oh my god James no this no why, why me." lily started to sob uncontrollably and smothered her face into James chest. Then looked up at James and smiled, her eyes were cold and remote, "they're better off dead." James was in complete shock. This wasn't the Lily he knew; he didn't understand normally she loved. How could a person hate their parents so much? She looked at the confusion in his eyes and felt the need to explain she didn't intend to horrify him.
"James. Do you want to know the real reason I broke up with you?" Lily stated very simply.
"Sure…" James replied wary of her explanation.
"It's a long story so get ready and I want no interruptions understand?" Lily had an annoyed look on he face
"Yes." James stated, "My lips are zipped."
I guess when you tell a story like this you start from the beginning so that's what I'll do. I remember the day I got my letter from Hogwarts; it was the happiest day of my life. Not because of the fact that I was a witch, I hated my life up until that point. I was dreadfully bored, and now you are thinking how could that be possible you had the life fit for a queen. Well that wasn't true you see I grew up in a family of old money, we were filthy rich some said we had more money than god. My days were planed, get up run four miles, shower, eat with the family, get tutored in Latin, English, Math, lunch, dress fittings yoga for an hour, read for two hours, Dinner party, bed. That was it my days were so routine that I could tell you if I was or wasn't available for lunch on Thursday three months away. There were no surprises. And I was bored I hated my family, the friends I was stuck with my tutors. Then I got my letter and I saw it as my chance to escape my chance for freedom life without rules and limits, life that I would be able to run outside barefoot. Walk on the beech, live. And I took my chance, and my parents let me. I was still at the age where it wasn't noticed if I was at a party or not. Then the summer before fourth year it all went to hell I met him Jason was his name and I was infatuated with him. He was all I thought about, he was all that mattered. Well he tried to rape me and I didn't stand for that I used magic outside of school and he said I was Looney and that he would tell all of our family friends, and we would loose everything. When I got home my father was furious and asked why I didn't just sleep with him. He has been blackmailing our family ever since and has taken our fortune. That was the day I began to hate them really hate them but they made a deal with me that summer. The only way I could go back to Hogwarts was to marry Ian. Well lets just say Ian has never been that gentle with me almost every time I see him he abuses me in one way or the other. I hate him, and everything he stands for he hates me to. He in fact is in love with his first girlfriend Jessica. Well I was tired of hitting me summer of fifth year. So I showed him I could be loving and gentle I tried really tried but he still hates me. And I still had to marry him, what could I do. I let you the only person I ever loved take something that was rightfully yours, and then broke your heart. That makes me an awful person. But I couldn't let Ian have that from me; I would rather be some cheap whore than his virgin. I had to end it with you because of this promise this stupid promise that I made to them. But now they're dead so I have no reason to go on with this charade. I love you James please don't give up on me." Lily started to cry really cry for the first time in months she cried for happiness, sorrow, and love. And James sat and held her. He swore to himself that day that he was going to make this girl happy he would marry her.
Lily sat up and too her relief the nausea was gone she made to get out of bed. James grabbed her arm; she looked and smiled at him "I have a funeral to go to and an engagement to break." She walked down the stairs from the boy's dorms. And to her own, she may be breaking one promise but she had to keep one. In her parent's last will and testament it stated everything belonged to her as long as she sang at the funeral. That she would do for them, but it would be her own song, one that she wrote when she was only twelve years old.
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A week later and lily was standing over her parents grave the ones she hated so much, with her fake tears to keep up appearances of the fact they were the "perfect family." Lily went behind the keyboard ready to sing. This was the last thing she would ever do for them. Little did her family's friends know this song was about her childhood and them never being there. They had hurt her completely, wounded her soul. Her father hated her, her mother hated her, and the worst of it she was always alone. Which made her less scared of her future; she had James that's all that mattered. So with the fake tears flowing she began to play.
I waited for you today
But you didn't show
No, no I need you today
So where did you go
You told me to call
You said you be there
And though I haven't seen you
Are you still there?
I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel you
By my side
So I hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone
And though I cannot see you
I can't explain why
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You placed in my life
We cannot separate
Cause your part of me
And though you're invisible
I trust the unseen
I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel you
By my side
So I hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone
We cannot separate
Cause your part of me
And though you're invisible
I trust the unseen
I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel you
By my side
So I hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone
She ended her song the others around her crying she walked to the grave and threw a lily on top of both caskets then it began to rain. Lily looked up towards the sky smiling, knowing fully she had finally done something right. For once in her life she didn't screw it up. She walked over to Ian and hugged him saying "go and get Jessica, were done I have no wish to marry you I'm sorry." He looked her in the eyes and smiled "I'm sorry for ever hitting you, your just so god damn stubborn." Lily smiled and walked away she didn't know where she was going but the rain felt so good. She smiled to herself ready to face the world.
She heard someone call her name she turned around to face James.
-:-
to be continued I will update soon thanks for the reviews love all the fans the song is never alone by Barlow girls hoped you enjoyed. Xoxox
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