Chapter Ten: Gaara

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Just S.E., Riyo and Kari.

Whoa. No really, whoa. It's been...like...half a year since I updated! Not kidding! I'm really, really, really sorry! First it was the groundings and the writers block...Don't be mad!

Look! It's the Gaara chapter! Yeah!

After Gaara: Temari, Kankurou, Ino. If you want me to do a character, let me know! I'm open for anything! Except lawyers!

Remember, no flames and don't take this fic seriously.

S.E. was sitting on the floor, playing Chinese checkers with Kari, her Neji/Tenten doll.

"Yay! I'm winning!"

"Uhh…S.E., Princess Gaara is back…" Riyo yelled to S.E. using a megaphone.

"'kay!"

S.E. started getting ready.

"Gaara, I'm not pregnant!" Temari yelled.

"Yell at me, and you die. Yelling's bad for the baby. It says so in this How To Be Not Aggressive When Your Teen Sister Has A Baby book," Gaara flashed the book in Temari's face.

"Hey, Gaara, there's a killing spree mall in that odd, studio place that brings back humiliation for me…" Kankurou said out of nowhere.

"Killing spree? Whoa. You stay here or I'll kill you."

Gaara ran to the KYS studio disguised as a killing spree mall.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! GOTCHA!" S.E. dropped a net on Gaara.

"What the…you! You're the girl who called me a princess!" Gaara said.

"Maybe I am….maybe I am…oh what the heck, I am!" S.E. winked and dragged Gaara to a chair, tied him and went up to the hard to pronounce place to start the torture-er- talk.

"Welcome one and all! I'm S.E., your favorite executioner -er- announcer and this….this is Princess Gaara of the Sand! Yeah!" S.E. announced.

"I'm not a girl! Or a princess!"

"Yeah right. So….how has being a princess been?"

"….I'll kill you…"

"Bla bla bla…Gaara…is in love…with sushi…"

"Hunh? SUSHI! I love death! Not sushi!"

"Princesses don't love sushi? That's unheard of! Everybody loves sushi!" S.E. threw sushi in the air.

"I don't."

S.E. raised her brow.

"Gaara…wants to name Temari's baby Suzy…"

"Umm…I heard it was a guy…and- DON'T CATCH ME OFFGUARD!" Gaara roared.

"Sheesh, I can see why Temari hates the name Suzy…"

Gaara growled.

"I DON'T WANT TO NAME HER BABY SUZY!"

S.E. shook her head.

"First it's Suzy…what will be next?" she asked to the audience.

Murmur. Murmur.

Gaara wasn't usually like this. He could have had her squished by the sand demon's sand. What was happening?

"Oh Gaara, forgot to tell ya this: This is a sand demon-proof studio! I just installed it last night! Of course, it did cost me big bucks, but who cares!" S.E. grinned.

Of course! I should have known…hmmm, angrily thought Gaara.

"Gaara…the only reason he carries his gourd around is because he's trying to make a fashion statement…Gaara, nobody wants to put a load on their back for the sake of fashion," S.E. shook her head.

"I don't do this for a fashion statement. I could…really…care less," he said, bubbling with irritation.

"Uh huh. Good luck with that. That's a fashion faux pas if you ask me. Or Ino. She might know too," she said, quickly adding Ino in her sentence.

"I hate you. Once my sister's baby is born, I will eliminate you once and for all!"

S.E. shook her head. Only she knew the truth about Temari's 'baby'.

"Now you know the princess who loves sushi and wants to name Temari's baby Suzy AND is trying to make a fashion statement sand demon…er…guy who has Shukaku inside him…yeah, let's go with that," S.E. said, catching her breath.

"Nothing about what you said is true! I will make sure you eat those words…in death," he said, deadly.

"Eat my words? That's impossible!" she laughed.

"I'm leaving. Temari has to go to a Lamaze class and I have to force her to go," he said, still a bit humiliated.

"Vogue will never call you! Gourds are out of style! I should know!" she yelled after him.

"That idiot," Gaara muttered under his breath, shoving away his bad memories of being humiliated at the Know Your Stars studio.

"Is he REALLY shoving away his memories? This is too dramatic!" S.E. rolled her eyes at what Gaara was doing and continued to eat more doughnuts.

"Oooh! Crullers!"

S.E.: Heheh...another show where Lee didn't show up.

Chi: I kinda miss his random poppings and craziness

Natasha: He must really be planning something BIG to not appear for a while.

S.E.: But what...?