Going Back to Avenue Q
A fanfiction sequel to the musical Avenue Q.
Note: Each chapter will include an original song based off Avenue Q. This is done so it still feels like a musical as you read along.
Chapter 2
Up in the superintendent's apartment, thunderous noises commence. Cat-calls, moaning, and naughty, naughty words are roared within the walls of Gary's home. It's fairly obvious to all that he and Lucy are having quite a time, yet everyone except for Brian and Christmas Eve, of course is accustomed to hearing the sounds of barbaric lovemaking night after night.
As Christmas Eve and Brian attempt to have a quiet night of relaxation after a hard day's work at unpacking, the two acknowledge this raucous.
"Wow- I guess Gary chooses to be as loud as the hell he wants every night around here. No one else seems to mind it, though," Brian comments.
"Brian- comprain prease! I have headache and it make me lose my mood for ruvmaking," Christmas Eve pleads.
"Aw, c'mon honey- I guess it's something we need to get used to. Remember- Gary had to deal with us once," Brian defends.
"Yeah, but he horny bastard. He probabry rive vicariousry through everyone erse's ruv rife," Christmas Eve scoffs.
"Christmas Eve, please don't be in a bad attitude about it now. He and Lucy helped us a lot today. They want their… um… relaxation, too," Brian continues to defend.
After a sigh of grief, Christmas Eve says, "I sorry, Brian. Evelything feer so different now. I don't know what to feer."
"I know, honey, I know," Brian agrees. "But we're with our friends!"
"Things around here change so much. I wonder if they change too," Christmas Eve ponders glumly.
"Sweetie," Brian consoles…
Brian, to tune of Schadenfreude5 years may have passed us
and of course, things have been changing
But sometimes people do not change
When their life is rearranging
Christmas Eve, didn't you see
They were happy to see us too
Please don't worry
If they changed, it's only to improve
Christmas Eve (interjecting and speaking)
But Brian, how can you terr?
We heard all the updates
From every single person down here
Nicky's still a slacker
So that's one less thing you should fear
Rod's okay 'cause he's still gay
Though he hasn't found his lifemate
And Trekkie's still Trekkie
We all know that he still masturbates
Christmas Eve (interjecting and speaking)
I suppose I see your point-
Princeton's still obsessed with purpose
Even though he claims he's found his
And Kate has her sweet disposition
Even if she's not a "misses"
And Gary is still Gary
And though Lucy's not a "slut"
She's the same inside
She's kept her attitude and stuff to strut
"You know, Brian? You make me feer a ROT better," Christmas Eve says, sweetly. "Now I'm back in the mood! Work your mama!"
With that, the couple blocks out the sounds of Gary and Lucy by creating an uproar themselves.
---
Later that night, Kate wakes up from her sleep. She and Princeton alternate whose apartment they crash every night, and tonight they are in her apartment. Without turning on the light at her bedside, Kate reaches into the drawer of her nightstand and pulls out a small jewelry box. Inside is a 14 karat gold ring with a purple gemstone in the middle, and engraved inside the ring are the words, "My lucky penny." She then reminisces about the time Princeton gave up his lucky penny to her, saying that it made him lucky enough to find her. Kate adoringly slips on the ring, gazing at the stone.
Suddenly, a stir from Princeton shocks Kate into a state of stillness. She slowly turns her head to see if anything is wrong.
"No… don't beat the bunny, Bad Idea Bears," Princeton mutters to himself in his sleep.
Kate sighs with relief in knowing that Princeton is still dreaming. She quickly and quietly returns the ring in its place, lies back down, and hugs Princeton, whispering, "I love you, my lucky penny."
---
Early the next morning a Sunday morning, Lucy exits the apartment to fetch the Sunday newspaper. Since Gary is the superintendent, he is the only one on the street who can afford to have the Sunday paper delivered, let alone a regular newspaper subscription. She's clad in a silky, red robe that comes down to 3 inches above her knee. There is paisley-designed black lace at the bottom of her robe and at the sleeves. She bends at the waist to pick up the paper, as if she is putting on a show for anyone else watching when, evidently, no one is outside to see her seductive moves, and struts back up to Gary.
Meanwhile, Trekkie stares from behind his window outside, watching Lucy's every move. He is eating a bowl of cereal and standing a good 3 feet away from the window, so as not to be noticeable if Lucy dared to look up in his direction. He sulks in his chair, messily eating his breakfast.
As he finishes, he sets his bowl down, walks toward the window, and ponders aloud.
Trekkie, to the tune of Fantasies Come True
If only you knew that 2 years ago
I was one who left roses after your show
But I was dumb- I leave no name
You think it Gary, but myself I blame
And since then I agonize
Can't even look you in the eyes
I don't know what to do
'Cause I never love till there was you
And now I find
I wish I know how to hit on you
I'll be blue
Until my fantasy come true
And now I wait
And compensate with computer program I make
That shows
My fantasy coming true
After a final sigh, Trekkie grunts over to the sink, drops his bowl, and clomps down in front of his computer. There, he uploads his computer program in which he generates a cyber Lucy taking part in pornographic actions. Although he winds up enjoying himself at that moment, he is still crushed within.
---
In the afternoon, Christmas Eve visits Kate Monster at Kate's request so she may be given a tour of the school. Within seconds, Kate runs Christmas Eve over to the Monsterssori School and she, in hyperactive mode, tells everything Christmas Eve needs to know.
"Trekkie continued to give generous donations so I've been able to open up classrooms for kindergarten to 4th grade. 4th grade, Christmas Eve! Can you believe it? Even 4th graders will be given justice in school. When they transfer out, they'll have more confidence in themselves without the history of really childish torture just because they're different!" Kate Monster beams.
Christmas Eve laughs at Kate's enthusiasm. "Kate, you haven't change a bit."
"I'd like to think I have, but I guess it's comforting to you that I haven't drastically changed," Kate replies.
"What erse do you have in the schoor?" Christmas Eve asks.
"Well, I'm currently trying to get the kids to be able to participate in sports leagues. Of course, I want it to be fair and have them only compete with monsters. But I'm the only one with a monster school for another 500 miles!" Kate Monster adds in.
"Do I have office?" Christmas Eve asks.
"Well, even though we've had generous donations, we had to cut down on some things since the school is still small. I have about 10 monsters per grade. And only 4 teachers, 3 of which are old spinsters. Who bother me about getting paid," Kate muses, in a tone that gradually becomes meek and humble as she realizes what little she has.
"But I thought you said faculty grow fast," Christmas Eve recounts.
"We went from just Princeton to 2 teachers after one year! And 2 more the year after that!" Kate says, with a feigned sense of accomplishment.
"That okay, Kate. At reast it get better," Christmas Eve comforts.
"Anyway, to answer your question… since we don't have much money and we don't have that many rooms, I'm just going to take out one of the 2 janitor's closets and make it your office!" Kate says, in a beaming and positive attitude.
As they walk toward the prospective office, Kate beams with a smile and hums to herself. Christmas Eve takes notice and, when they arrive at the "office," asks, "Why you so happy?"
"Well," Kate says, modestly, "Princeton and I have been together for a long time. Since you left, actually. And things couldn't be better!"
"That good," Christmas Eve says, wishing Kate said more. Before she could even inquire, Kate quickly wraps up the tour and walks Christmas Eve out.
"I'll see you tomorrow and announce it to everyone right before classes start!" Kate says. With that, she skips along happily to Princeton's house, which is right next door to the school.
Though Christmas Eve is unsatisfied with the information she's been given about Kate and Princeton's status, she goes home to Brian and commences a butt-smacking since Brian sat on his butt all-day and an all-out scrub down of the apartment.
---
As Princeton and Kate eat a quiet dinner, they smile constantly and even play footsie. When they finish, Kate takes the opportunity to confront Princeton.
"When are we going to tell everyone?" Kate asks with obvious impatience.
"I want to wait for an opportunity to tell everyone at once," Princeton replies.
"Are you afraid to-"
"Not this time, no," Princeton interrupts. "Kate- we agreed to take things slow, and we did. I just want this to be slow, too. You know what'll happen once we let word get out."
Kate frowns slightly with disappointment. Princeton gently grips Kate's chin with his thumb and index finger and says, "I want it to be a special thing when they find out, too. That's all."
Comforted, Kate smiles and the couple cleans off the table, rushing to get to bed before Gary and Lucy ruin their mood. What they don't realize is that just as much as Kate's anxious to let the cat out of the bag, everyone else is mulling over the extra surge of happiness between the couple.