The paper streamers hung from the ceiling of the Pizza Hut in Long Island. The room was filled with drunken college guys, ogling centerfolds, and just genuinely having fun. The young girls upstairs had tired of their asses being pinched and having to haul pitchers of beer to a bunch of lust filled boys. It was a celebration , a rite of passage, one of their own was spending his last days as a bachelor.
"To my buddy Ross." cried Chandler as he lifted his beer. "I have one word, why?' he laughed. Chandler was one of the biggest commit phobes in the world. He never understood why someone who was so young would get married if they weren't forced into it. Initially he had asked Ross, if he maybe had knocked up Carol. Ross was in love with being in love. When he finally gave up on the childhood fantasy named Rachel. He met, fell in love , and then after graduation proposed to Carol. Within days, Ross was getting married.
A girl wearing a bikini started rolling her body seductively to the music. Her eyes were painted as well as her cheeks. Her hair was big and teased. She slowly danced over and put her body against the groom's as the guys all began to cheer loudly. Ross was drunk and enjoying this, she was so sexy and her only job tonight was to please him as the man of honor.
"I'm Ross, I'm Ross, I'm too good for the Hut." he drunkenly proclaimed. The guys all started laughing again. Ross wrapped his arms around his present and started to kiss her. At that point, he dropped over completely passed out.
"Okay that's enough. Party's over guys. He's gone." Chandler helped him up and walked him out to his car. Dragging him up the stairs, Carol held open the door. "A little too much celebrating." said Chandler as he handed Ross over to Carol. "He's going to be one hurtin puppy tomorrow." he said as he left the apartment.
The next day Chandler had come over to see how Ross was doing. Carol, Judy and Monica all had gone to do those nasty little bridal errands along with Adelaide Willick, Carol's mother. Chandler carried in a six pack as he came in and saw all the wedding books spread all over the table.
"Thought you could use some male bonding. " he smiled "Hair of the dog." he said as he handed Ross a beer. Ross took a sip and then put it down as he made a face. "How wasted was I?" he asked.
"Let's put it this way. You were dirty dancing with the stripper and me." he said. "But hey, you only get married once right?" said Chandler. "That's how I planned it." said Ross. "But Chandler can I talk to you?" said Ross seriously. He straightened up and looked Chandler in the face. Chandler had seen this look before.
"I'm scared. No I'm am scared shitless. What am I doing?" he exclaimed. "I am getting married. Married at twenty two years old. I am just out of college and I am fucking getting married."
"Well dude, you are braver than me." Chandler said as he took another sip. He wished he could have had a cigarette right then, but he knew Ross would never go for it. " I can't even get a girl to call me for a second date." Chandler said. "Do you realize that you never have to be rejected by a girl again? You never have to ask her out or anything. You have the woman that you will be with for the rest of your life. I envy you man."
Ross smiled. "I love her Chandler. I have only felt this way about one other girl. And that girl didn't even know I was alive. Carol understands me and shares my dreams. She wants to travel to far away exotic places too. And I can't wait to start having kids. I mean being a dad is going to be great and Carol is going to be a great mother."
Chandler could only imagine how happy his friend was. He couldn't make a commitment, and every time a girl wanted to start something., he could only remember the painful arguments that his own parents had. He didn't want a marriage or family because for him it was only pain and torture. He didn't have a normal mother and father. His mother when she met his roommate started to eye him in a way that made Chandler very uncomfortable. His father and him hadn't talked in years, ever since he moved out West and started his own drag show. Behind the wall of insecurity of Chandler Bing, lay one latent fear….he was gay just like his father.
Ross on the other hand was raised as this perfect child in this perfect little house. He had taught almost from the cradle that when you grow up , you get married and then you have children. This was the way that life was. For years, he had this perfect little picture of marrying Rachel and having kids. Now the woman in the picture was different. But for the rest of the portrait, everything was perfect.
It is always busy work before a wedding. Weddings are for brides and not for grooms. It is a painful process of being told where to stand and who to talk to, looking over books that are of no interest to you but to the woman you love , you see her excitement and then you suddenly become interested. Carol had been instructed in the Jewish faith, since her Episcopalian background was foreign to her fiancee. Being raised half Jewish, it was Ross' wish to be married in the temple and to raise his children as Jewish as well. Another part of the wedding preparations was that since Carol didn't know that many people, she had Monica as her maid of honor. As Best Man, Chandler now had to face the girl who cut off his toe.
"So I guess, we'll be hanging out together for the next few days. " Chandler said as he held a drink in his hand.
"Yeah, can't be helped. I just dread this that's all." Monica muttered as she started to walk away, knowing she had already said too much.
"Why do you say that?" wondered Chandler. "You wouldn't understand , you are an only child and I am not too sure I can confide in you." Monica said as she turned away. Chandler walked up to her. "Look Monica, I know we didn't have the best introduction, but I would at least like to be friends. It would make life easier the next few days." he smiled as he put his hand out. "Friends?"" Monica looked at Chandler, how could she resist such a cute guy. Monica put out her hand. "Friends." she smiled. Ross and Carol walked over. "Hey this is great, my baby sister and my best friend getting along. "
Monica balked. "You call me baby sister again and I will show everyone here just how much of a baby I am when I sit on your face." Ross had a scared look on his face and just backed away.
"Woah that was cold." said Chandler. "Well I have had it with him and his perfect little life. My whole life it has been Ross this and Ross that…I mean I don't know how you could stand that little nerd." Monica vented. Chandler remembered when Ross told him how they had finally made peace. Apparently peace was over. "Well my mother has been making such a big deal about this wedding and just because I don't have a boyfriend right now, she thinks I am always going to be this fat girl. Plus the fact I chose to go to cooking school and he is studying for his Phd . Once again, my mother makes me feel like crap. It's dinosaurs for Christ sake." she yelled.
Chandler never really knew the story of Monica and Ross's relationship. As far as he knew, it was all one sided. Monica looked at him as if she was trying to reach out to him. He was unthreatening and harmless. She could use another friend. Chandler just kept looking at her blue eyes and dark hair. She was rather hot and he could never understand how two siblings could be so different. One hot and smoldering and the other so shy and nebbish.
"It's called a yamakah and you wear it on your head." Ross said as he put the cap on his best friend. "We wear it as a sign of respect to God." he said as he had his father pin it to his head. Chandler could see the sweat pouring off Ross 'forehead and feel how clammy his hands were. This was the first time in his life that Chandler had ever set foot in a church. But it wasn't a church , it was a synagogue. He couldn't imagine it , Chandler Bing, King of Unconventional was going to act as the best man at his roommate 's wedding. He looked out the groom's room into the temple. There was a large white canopy at the front adorned with flowers. People filled the seats in anticipation of the ceremony.
"You look like you are the one who is getting married. You look terrified." said Ross. "I've never been in a church before. It's scary." said Chandler softly. "Well don't worry because all you have to do is stand next to me and hand me the ring." Ross said. "Thanks for doing this for me man, you are my dude." he said hugging him. The two men backed off each other for fear that someone would see them hugging.
"Boys, it's time." announced Judy. Chandler went to his place beside Monica and offered her his arm. Ross went to the back of the synagogue as he stood between his mother and father. Monica walked slowly down the aisle as she looked ahead. She was just too nervous to look over at Chandler. He looked so good in his tux.
As the Gellers walked their son to the canopy. The Willicks were next in line behind them. George and Adelaide walked their daughter in this terribly foreign rite. Carol smiled under her veil as she walked toward her groom. When they arrived under the canopy , Carol kissed her father and turned toward Ross. Joining hands, they looking into each other's eyes. Carol pledged her undying love and Ross pledged that he would never love another woman other than Carol. Chandler laughed at the irony of that statement and wondered how long that promise would last if the cheerleader of his youth would suddenly come strolling into his life. Commitment was a word that was foreign to him . Monica waited and prayed for the day when she would be the bride standing under the canopy and wondering who her groom would be. True she was jealous of Ross, but she was also happy because he would finally have what he really wanted. As Chandler handed Ross their family ring that he placed on Carol's finger, in his own mind maybe this is what he wanted after all too.
As Ross put his foot on the glass , it shattered. Everyone shouted "Matzeltov!"
Hours later, Monica came up to Chandler. "Hey want to dance?" she smiled. "I have got to warn you. I am a terrible dancer." he said rising from the chair at the main table. "That's okay. I only know what my father taught me." He led her to the dance floor where they moved to the sounds of the orchestra.
"They make a cute couple." Carol smiled as she laid her head on her husband's shoulders. Ross looked over with disdain. He thought the world of Chandler . But would he be good enough for his little sister? Ross dismissed the thought. "Nah, it'll never happen." he thought as he mentally planned his bright future.