Strike Three...
Summary: Sam is having trouble dealing with the powers that were bestowed on him. Dean tries to help, but seems to be hurting Sam more than helping him. Finally Sam has enough of Dean's shit, and takes off to clear his head. Little does he know that what dad always taught him, should have come in handy, he should have paid attention to what goes bump in the night.
Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, Jensen Ackles, or Jared Padelecki... Nor do I own Rafael De La Cruz or Colby Jansen, or Carpathians, they belong to Christine Feehan... I own the plot, but I make no money on this story, only pleasure in my sadistic ways.
Warning: There is violence, and a lot of foul language, also in some chapters there is self harm... If you do not like, please don't read! For those who can handle this story, please review and tell me what you think.
Chapter 10: Swing at the Gates Of Heaven...
Rafael picked up Sam from the ground as if he weighed nothing, and took long, powerful strides towards the hotel; which now had no owner. He walked right to a door on the end, and when he found it locked; opened his mind and manipulated the device to make it open. He carried Sam over to a bed and placed him on it; watching with concern as the young man curled in on himself still rocking though he was laying down; and repeating the same phrase over and over.
"My fault, my fault, my fault..."
Colby watched helplessly as John went over and sat by his youngest son's side and placed a steadying hand on Sam's side. There was no reaction from the young Winchester; and Colby knew that Sam was going to stay like he was until someone helped him. She also knew that someone had to be either Rafael or herself; and knew that Rafael wasn't familiar with Sam like she was.
She walked closer to the pair that were on the bed and placed her small hand on the strong shoulder of John Winchester. He looked up at her, and she spoke four words; "Let me help him." It was a simple enough suggestion and when she used he mind to persuade him, he nodded; squeezing Sam's side, before getting up, and walking over to 'comfort' his other son. He placed one hand on Dean's shoulder, and the man nodded; taking the move for what it was; and demanding nothing more of his father.
Colby sat down in the place that John had resided in only seconds before, and placed a soothing hand on Sam's shoulder; feeling the younger man shake. She placed her hands on his head silently and he slowly uncurled from himself; facing her with unseeing eyes. She took a deep breath and looked at Rafael, who nodded, showing that he would be there for her if she needed him; and she opened her mind.
Colby separated herself from her body, and joined with Sam's mind. It was dark, the blackness around her deafening; and there was no sign of Sam; no sound or sight that he had even been there; and that fact scared her more than anything ever had. She took another deep breath to steady herself, and searched for where Sam was in his mind; trying to be as gentle as possible, knowing that she could hurt Sam more than he already was if she went too hard or fast.
She found Sam sitting in the corner of a gray room, sitting as he had been in the parking lot; his knees draw up to his chest, arms around his knees, and his head cushioned on his knees; rocking back and forth repeating the ever present mantra. She drew closer to him, her pace slow, not wanting to startle him if he looked up at her. She touched his shoulder, and gasped, falling to her knees as images flooded her mind, along with a voice repeating the same thing that Sam had been saying non stop.
'It's your fault, you killed them! Your FAULT!'
Their mother was burning on the ceiling, her unseeing eyes boring into both of theirs.
The drops of blood splashing onto Sam's forehead, and another pair of unseeing eyes, as Jessica bled in the flames on his ceiling.
'Your fault!'
Lucas being mauled in his hospital room, his screams and convulsions filling the room, as Gavin looked down at him smirking.
'All your fault!'
She pulled away from him with another gasp, and for the first time since Gavin had planted the images and mantra into his head, Sam looked at her. He actually saw something other than the repeating images that bombarded him and made guilt build and gnaw at his heart and soul. She saw the pain and the guilt in his almost opaque eyes, and she shivered; never before had she seen so much built up emotion in one person, and it was tearing him apart. He was her half-brother, related to her by their mother, a powerful witch and foreseer, and dammit she was going to help him if it killed her. He was blood and she didn't let her blood down... She would fight with his subconscious until the her younger brother, believed that nothing that had happened with his mother, girlfriend, or the man that had saved him, had been his fault.
As she thought a bright mark filled their combined minds, and Colby recognized it as soon as it had appeared, gasping as she looked back at Sam. The mark was that of their mother's family, the Dragonseekers, and unless the person in their family was the most powerful alive, and the true heir of the family, and was in need of great help mentally or physically; it would not show. She had read about it, but had never actually seen the mark appear; and after speaking to Rafael telepathically, she knew it had shown up in the room, and he was just as awed by it and Sam as she was.
Colby looked over to Sam, and knew that he had read her thoughts, as he looked at the mark almost mesmerized by the sheer beauty of it. He knew that it was here for him, and knew that the family, the ones alive and the ones passed on were trying to help him with his problems, even though they knew nothing of him; nor he of them. The mark changed in color and size, turning a midnight blue color as it shrunk in size and moved towards Sam's arm. Sam moved his arm out in front of him, and watched the mark overlapped his other one, and glowed on his forearm.
Warm and reassuring feelings entered Sam and Colby's mind, thanking Colby for the help that she was trying to give to Sam, and telling Sam that he should hold no guilt for that which was no fault of his own. Another bright light erupted in Sam's mind, and unknowingly to Sam and Colby, it appeared in the room also, almost blinding all of its occupants. When the light receded, it left an apparition of Mary Winchester, Sam and Colby's mother. She turned and looked directly at Sam, the warmth in her eyes, making him feel better as soon as she looked upon him.
"Mom?" Sam whispered, his voice not but a whisper, and tears glistened in his eyes. The room around him started to show, along with the people in it, but Sam saw nothing else but his mother, the one that he had never really met, but loved almost above everything else in his life.
"Sam," she said, her voice gentle and gliding over him like the warmth of a well used quilt. She walked over and Colby moved from her spot, letting her mother take her seat, knowing that Sam needed her more than she did at the moment. Even though Mary Winchester was only a spirit, as her hand stroked over Sam's cheek, he felt the feather of a touch and almost broke down at the feel of it; almost remembering what it had felt like when he had been nothing more than a baby and his mother was still alive. "Sammy my son, why do you feel responsible for my death? It was not your fault my beautiful son, I chose to protect you, and given the chance I would do it again, maybe even sooner than I had, when I first felt that you were in danger."
"But-" Sam started, but was cut off by a gentle voice and the touch of a finger to his lips that he well knew and wasn't his mother. Sam turned and looked at the other beautiful blond, that had been the love of his life, and had gotten him through a lot of tough times. "Jess?" He asked, his voice hoarse and breaking, as tears actually did spill down his cheeks at the sight of the love that he had lost, the one that he could have saved, had he stayed at home, and had told her what he had saw in his dreams. He probably could have killed the thing that had killed his mother if he had stayed, but he had left and his girlfriend had joined the list of people that the demon had killed. Max's mom, Sam's mother, Jess... and maybe countless others that he didn't know about.
As if sensing his thoughts, Jess lifted his hand and pushed a kiss to his palm, and her voice was soft as she spoke words of love and reassurance to her love. "Sammy, I love you my hero. You saved me twice already, there was nothing that you could have done about the monster that took us. You saved me from the demons in my mind, just as I am trying to do for you, and when the car crashed, though you had a concussion and broken leg, you pulled me out and saved me, causing pain to yourself, you loved me and I loved you, it was enough. You needed to search with Dean for your father, and you had no way of knowing that the dreams were going to come true. If you had stayed with me, the demon would have got what it wanted. It would have killed or taken you, like it had tried to do before, and I am grateful that it didn't. Sam what happened to me and your mother was not your fault, and neither was the death of that man. The man saved you and you feel guilty when you should not. His death was no fault other than the demon that killed him; just as our deaths weren't." Sam nodded, feeling a weight that he didn't know had been there lift from his chest.
As Jess was talking to him, Mary had talked to Dean, John and Colby, to tell them what she had not had the chance to say before she had died. She thanked Rafael for taking such good care of Colby, and welcomed him to her family with a good heart, which he thanked her for. He told her that he was honored she would accept a man like him into her family, to which she responded that any man who would protect, love and cherish Colby as he did; was welcome in her family, as Jess had been for Sam.
Jess stayed with Sam the entire time, not wanting to give up any time that she had with him to spend with anyone else, and that was one of the reasons that she and Mary got along. Both loved Sam, and both would do anything to protect him, as the had proven when the demon had taken both their lives. Though Sam had been hurt over their deaths, they would rather see him hurt then dead, or captive and that was a formed bond between them, that held strong as they watched over the family that they had left behind. Jess had no siblings and her parents had died in her senior year of High School, so Sam and his family had been her family. There had been nothing that she wouldn't do for them, and when Sam had needed her, she had risen to the occasion and given up her life to save his.
When they had to leave, Jess told Sam to fall in love and that she would see him at the gates of heaven when he had lived a long and happy life.
Sam's voice had been low and full of emotion when he had responded to her with, "I will meet you there, and we will swing at the gates of heaven, just like you always said we would." She gave him a kiss and left along with Mary, leaving everyone in the room feeling better about themselves.
Swing at the gates of heaven my love... I will see you again...
A/N: What do you think? Only the epilogue left... hope you liked it.
