Semiautomatic Mix Tape

Chapter III: Globes And Maps

A/N: Still don't own Degrassi. Still don't own any music (Globes And Maps-- Something Corporate)

Ohhh, so I noticed that some of you guys were confused about who's in chapter 1. I thought I made it obvious enough, but this chapter should definitely explain who it is. Thanks for all the reviews and whatnot... tell all your friends to read it.


Light breaks underneath a heavy door
And I try to keep myself awake
Fall all around us on our hotel floor
And you think that you've made a mistake
And there's a pain in my stomach from another sleepless binge
And I struggled to get myself up again

I stood in front of the latest car to end up outside of the small trailer I called home (or "the lunchbox" as a friend of mine once called it). It was an old Buick which didn't look too bad minus a few dents on the right side of the car, a missing hub cap and a few rust spots. That was just the car's exterior; the interior needed a lot of work. Or so I was told from the note that was folded up on the hood of the car. In truth, it didn't need any type of work. The seats may have been a little messed up, but the engine ran fine. I thought about my idea of setting up an auto shop in Toronto and shook my head. It was a crazy idea, I know, and I'm lucky she didn't take me back. I would've been screwed then, because she wasn't the person I was going back to see in the first place. Try telling that to my friends though.

There it was the old apartment that I used to share with the girl everyone assumed I was in love with. The girl whose name my friend thought I had gotten tattooed across my chest. I looked down at the broken down car, thought about that auto shop and laughed bitterly. I would've been committing myself to a lifetime of so-called hell. Sure, I would've been running an auto shop with my best friend, but I would've been stuck sharing my old apartment with a girl I never really loved. She was my rebound relationship; something to take my mind off the only girl I could ever love. This girl was perfect, the sort of girl from your best wet dreams. And then I guess you could say people changed, I changed. I made some new friends and she couldn't handle it. It's not my fault. Or maybe it is.

I wanna hang onto something
That won't break away or fall apart
Like the pieces of my heart

So her dad gets sick, right? And what do I do? I steal the guy's laptop. Hey, hey, it was for a good cause. I was only trying to get a little money to hook up a car. That's what I do best, you know. I tried explaining it all; I still don't think she ever really forgave me. She got over it though, or at least forgot about it. Someone called me her knight in faded denim once-- or something stupid like that-- and I guess I am. I don't like to brag about it, but I did almost take a bullet for her. Things really change when it's a life or death matter. I saved her life, and when she finally came around to talking to me, I could really tell that she loved me again, even if she wouldn't say it. And for some reason, I didn't want her to say it. She didn't need to say anything, I just knew it.

After I saved her, and everything changed, I turned into a sort of local hero. Ohh, I was the boy who stopped a psycho. I was the boy who saved a girl's life. Big deal. I bet if you walked into my old school now, and asked anyone who I was, they would tell you the same thing. Sure, they would all have different personal things to say, but they would all mention the fact that I saved a girl's life. And I'm sure someone (a girl, no doubt) would mention how I used to date this girl. Whatever though, things got too hard being "the local hero," so I took my ass and got out of there. I'm with my parents now, which, for some odd reason, is where I felt the need to be.

And globes and maps are all around me now
I wanna feel you breathe me
Globes and maps I see surround you here
Why won't you believe me?
Globes and maps they chart your way back home
Do you wanna leave or something?

"Hey!" My dad stuck his head out the door. "HEY! COME ANSWER THE PHONE!"
"Who is it?"
"I don't know... some girl."

Some girl... I rolled my eyes. 'Way to be specific, dad.' I walked into the small cramped living room and went over to the phone. I snatched it away from my dad and answered it. The call wasn't important, just some girl from my new school asking what I was doing tonight. I told her I had plans. 'Plans... yeah, okay. Now I better make some plans before she comes over here.' I looked down at the phone and dialed the one number that I knew could give me some plans.

"Yo? Can I help you?"
"Hey... sup, what are you doing tonight?"
"Watching chick flicks," I could hear the sarcasm in his voice.
"Cool, can I join you?"
"Yeah yeah... look though, you wanna come down here? Cause I got somewhere to be at nine thirty and you know how long the drive there and back is."
"Sure... yeah... I'll drive down there. And what are you doing, seeing more ravine girls?"
"No, I think tonight's my lucky night."
"Oh yeah, after all the crazy shit you pulled and you think tonight's gonna be different?"
"Whatever man, I got a good feeling about this."
"Okay... so when are you going out?"
"Nine thirty..."
"Yeah, I might not get there until around then."
"So drive fast. See you..." He hung up before I could say anything.

And dreams came around you in a hazy rain
You opened your mouth wide to feel them fall
And I write a letter, from a one-way train
But I don't think you'll read it at all

"Hey, dad?"
"What is it now?"
"I'm going out for a while..."
"Uh-huh..."
"Yeah, I might not come back until sometime tomorrow."
"Uh-huh... Don't do anything... stupid."

I sighed and headed out the door. I looked at the cars that were lined up outside the house. There was a good selection of decent cars, but something pulled me towards that beat up Buick. Rust stains and all, I couldn't help but imagine the look on my friend's face when I showed up outside his house in the old thing. He could probably even help me fix it up a little. Having made my decision, I got into the car and started up the engine. I laughed, picturing everyone's reaction and drove away from the trailer park. A little vacation would do me some good.

An hour or so into the drive (about halfway through the trip), around eight thirty, it started raining. I'm not talking about your usual light storm with an occasional flash of lightening; I'm talking about a real storm; the type that could start a flood. I shook my head. My friend was an idiot, but I don't think he would go out in weather this bad even if he did think it was his "lucky night." Then again, if he wasn't home, I could always drive around until I found her. I would go down to the ravine, but he said that wasn't where he was gonna be; plus I never did like the whores down there.

And globes and maps are all around me now
I wanna feel you breathe me
Globes and maps I see surround you here
Why won't you believe me?
Globes and maps they chart your way back home
Do you wanna leave or something?

After another hour, and more bad weather, I ended up at his house. In all honesty, I was surprised the car made it all the way to Toronto considering that the roof started to leak. I got out of the car and knocked on the door. His dad answered, and I could smell the alcohol on him.

"You... whaddaya want?"
"Hey... let me in."
"The boy, eh? He ain't here. He's at the mall again."
"What? Why is he there?"
"Do you think I'd know boyo? He always goes there round this time. Comes back disappointed mumblin something bout luck."
"Oh... his lucky night..."
"Yeah yeah, he's late tonight. Now if I can't help you, leave. Go find him or something."

He slammed the door before I could protest him and I trudged back to the car. So he went to the mall... of course he did, I forgot that she worked in there now. I shook my head, he was never gonna give up. I guess I'm the same way. When we got our tattoos, he said we were getting the names of the girls we would never give up on. He was right. He's still chasing after her, and now I'm back and hoping to find the girl I abandoned. I guess that since he considered this night his lucky night, maybe the night would be lucky for me too. I was starting to doubt it as I drove along to familiar streets until I saw someone running. There was no mistaking the damp blonde hair that swung around her shoulders, under a hat, as she ran. I slowed down as I approached where she was running and let the window down.

"It's bad weather, eh?" I called out to her.
She stopped in her tracks and looked a little scared. "What? What? Who is that?"
"Wow... I've only been gone a year and you forget me already..."
"No! It's just... I can't believe it's really you. Why are you here?"
"I came to visit a friend. I didn't expect to run into you. Want a ride home? I think I still remember how to get there."

And I can't take this anymore
Well I know that I can't take this anymore
I can't take this anymore
Cause I know someday I'll see you walk out that door

She got into the car and smiled at me. I smiled back at her and started driving to her house. We went along in silence until I got there. I looked over at her and gave her an awkward smile. She looked away from me and started to open the car door before changing her mind and shutting it. She looked at me.

"Take me somewhere else... anywhere else. Let's go to the ravine."
"The ravine? Have you ever been down there?"
"Have I ever been there?" She laughed. "Fine, let's go to the park."
"That works."

We drove to the park, once again in silence. It was pretty hard to just sit there and not talk to her, but I couldn't come up with anything to say. And the fact that it was still raining, and the drops of water made a loud tapping sound when they hit the dashboard, made it difficult to say anything anyway. I parked in the lot and noticed that it was basically empty. I looked over at her, raising my eyebrows.

"Can we talk... outside, maybe? I don't want the roof of your car to cave in on us."
"Yeah, we can talk under that picnic thingy." I pointed towards the one area with a small wooden roof.

Once we had reached the small picnic area, I just stared at her. I thought in the distance I had heard some familiar voices, but I didn't bother thinking about them. The only thing that mattered to me was her. There was a sudden noise, like a tree branch being stepped on, and she flinched. I moved towards her and placed a hand on her shoulder. She smiled again and moved a little closer to me, so my hand hung over her shoulder.

"So really, why are you here?"
"I told you, I came to see someone."
"Me?" There was another snapping sound. "What is that?"
"Probably just some animal... Listen, can I show you something?"
"Oh God..."
"No, it's good." I pulled at my shirt just enough so my tattoo was revealed.
"Oh wow... you got that just for me? That's amazing..."
"I'm sorry, you know, for leaving, but I needed some space."
"I get it. It doesn't matter, you're here now."

She hugged me, the sound of the branches seemed a little closer, but maybe I was hearing things. I sighed and just looked down at her. I was waiting for her to say something else, but she didn't.

"You never told me, why were you outside? And why didn't you want to go home?"
"No reason... Just a stupid fight with someone. I didn't want them lurking around my house trying to talk to me."
"Oh..." Another loud branch sound. "Well whoever it is won't do anything."
"Yeah... I got my knight in faded denim with me."

We continued to stand there, and I don't know why I did it, but I kissed her. It wasn't something quick either; it was the type of sappy pathetic kiss you would watch in some chick flick. And right then, nothing else, not any familiar sounding voices or any snapping branches, could take me away from thinking about her. I was home, and that's where I planned on staying.

And globes and maps are all around me now
I wanna feel you breathe me
Globes and maps I see surround you here
Why won't you believe me?
Globes and maps they chart your way back home
So Do you wanna leave? Do you wanna leave?
Globes and maps they chart your way back home
Do you wanna leave or something?