Sorry it took so long. I really am. But I just started my new classes, and I have not written a lab in over a year (sad thought that ducky can write this but not a science lab) and my new French class is killing my confidence. It makes me feel stupid. So, anyways, enough of the complaining. For now. So here it is. It was originally going to be over twice this length, but what I had written sounded REALLY out of character, and I TRY to make everything seem as real as possible, I don't always succeed, but I try. I would like to thank all of you that reviewed my last chapter. You are wonderful people, and angry mobs shall not be sent after you. All of those that did read it, but decided that reviewing was too low for you, I have to say shame on you, and expect a visit from my angry mob and my penguins. Yes, penguins. And they are very vicious and will attack at random. I just thought I would warn you. And if you decide to run, they will hunt you down. But they do love all of you that reviewed! They might even send you candy, or a puppy, or maybe even a pony! I want a pony, but my mom said 'no'. That made me sad, but in your case, if you want one, just review and a pony will be sent to you door! Wow this is a long paragraph! Well, seeing as I am still writing, I might as well add that I believe that my social studies teacher is extremely crazy and ugly. She should be sterilized. Ok, now that you have all read that, I would like you to read my chapter. You know you want to! I mean, why else would you have checked out this web page? To just read this pretty little (not really) paragraph? I didn't think so! Go read! Now! Timmy, pick up your toys! Sorry, I was feeling random there.
Disclaimer: I still own nothing, and writing one of these every time I update is very depressing because it reminds me that my dream will never come true: Taylor ends up marrying a can of tomato soup, and Kirk makes out with Miss Patty. But i guess that is why I got into the fan fiction business; I can write those scenes for everyone else to read!
I am lazy, so if you see any grammatical errors, just tell me, and I will proof read this chapter. I wish I could say that I already did, but I didn't, so sue me! What a lovely person I am!
Chapter 4: A Crack Baby Named Tarzan
"Lukey! I want some fries!" Lorelai yelled as she walked into the diner. It was 5:30 and there were people all around. She sat at the counter where a cup of coffee had already been placed.
"And?" he asked.
"Well now that you mentioned it I would like a burger, and some chili fries to go with the regular ones, ooo! And I want to see you dance naked around the room!" she said with a smile plastered on her face.
"So that would be a burger, some chili fries, regular ones, and a straight jacket?" Luke asked.
"Ooo! Kinky!" she commented.
"Oh geez! Stop that! Wait, where's Jake?" he said with a hint of panic in his voice.
"Calm down soldier! I only gave him to Kirk to raise as the next Tarzan!" she joked.
"Hey! I'm over here!" Kirk yelled from the corner.
"Oh, sorry Kirk I didn't see you there. Did you leave the little guy at home with your mom?" Lorelai joked. Kirk gave her a questioning look. "Never mind Kirk." she said as she dismissed his idiocy with the wave of her hand. She then turned back to Luke. "Sookie volunteered her services as babysitter for the night so we could go out." she said thrilled at the thought. They hadn't gone out on a date for over a month and she was dying to get out of the house without Jake.
"What? You left him with Sookie?" he said panicking again.
"Luke, she has two children of her own. I am sure she can handle it. I mean Davey is still chained to the wall in her basement but hey, he'll break free eventually. Plus, don't you want to go on a date? Go have dinner, go see a movie, maybe I will do a little dancing in the nude later on." she said. She knew Luke wanted to get out as much as she did.
"Fine. Where do you want to go?" he asked as he leaned over the counter.
"Ooo! Sniffy's!" she yelled enthusiastically.
"But you are eating now. Why don't we just go see a movie or something." he said. He wasn't too keen on seeing Maisy and Buddy but only because of the question they would ask. Luke hadn't seen them in over a year and they would definitely ask why. Lorelai knew this was why he didn't want to go but she knew he would have to do it eventually.
"Luke you know I can eat more food than an elephant! And plus I will help explain everything to them." she said sympathetically. She lightly placed her hand on his.
"Ok. But can you wait half an hour? I will close up in a half an hour." he said still leaning over the counter.
"Yep! Hey! Why don't we just go dressed casually tonight?" she asked.
"Laundry day?" he asked.
"Laundry day. And Rory took all my good clothes so I would have to run around naked." she said with a smile. He knew her so well.
"Well you might want to hold off on that for a little while." He joked, "So I will meet you home in about 35 minutes?" he asked.
"Yep!" she answered.
"Luke! Chili fries, regular fries, and a cheeseburger!" Caesar yelled from the door way to the kitchen holding a to-go bag.
"Ah! You do care!" Lorelai said. Luke then went and grabbed some pie and placed it in the bag.
"And cherry pie." he added with a smile.
"Ah! You are the best man on earth! No offense Caesar, but you do come in at a close second." she added.
"None taken." Caesar said as he walked back into the kitchen.
"So I will see you at home." Luke said giving Lorelai a quick peck on the lips.
"Home." Lorelai said right before she walked out of the diner.
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Ring! Ring! Ring! The phone rang through the house.
"Hold on!" Lorelai yelled as she ran down the stairs to get the phone. She found it charging. "Well that's odd. Luke must have done that." she told herself.
"Hello?" she answered.
"Hey mom!"
"Hey babe! What cha doin'?" Lorelai asked as she walked up the stairs, phone still plastered to her ear.
"Oh, well I just got back from bringing one of my friends to the hospital so I just thought I would give you a call."
"What? Who was at the hospital?" Lorelai asked.
"Paris." She said nonchalantly.
"Really? What happened?" Lorelai asked, obviously very interested in the story.
And she cut her self with one of those knife things that artsy people use." Rory responded.
"Ah! So she did she have to get stitches?" Lorelai asked.
"Yah. So what are you doing right now?" Rory asked her mother as Lorelai slipped on a pair of clean jeans. Well the only pair of jeans.
"Ah, I am now…ah!" Rory heard a yelp and a thud in the background.
"Mom? Mom! Are you alright? Mom!" Rory asked frantically. What the hell was going on?
"Ah! Stupid me! I was trying to put on some pants and then I tripped and dropped the phone. Mommy's alright now. So as I was saying, I am getting ready to go out with Luke tonight." she said. Rory could tell that her mother was ecstatic about it.
"Wow! Yay! So who is watching Jake? Or is he coming along?" she asked.
"Ah, Sookie is going to watch Jake while me and Luke spend some time together. And then we will come home and…" Lorelai started but was interrupted by Rory.
"Mom! I don't what to hear about what you do with Luke in the bedroom!" Rory yelled into the phone.
"Oh, my poor baby is being tainted by my dirty plans!" Lorelai said faking sympathy.
"Why yes she is."
"Well actually I was going to tell you that we were going to come home, with Jake of course, and then all go to bed! After coffee though." she added.
"Yah, you can't forget the coffee. So how is Luke?" Rory asked.
"Good, he's good. Why?" Lorelai asked.
"No particular reason. I just wanted to know. It is the polite thing to do."
"Where did you learn that?" Lorelai asked.
"I think it was on Sesame Street when I was 5." Rory said.
"Ah, well that explains the manners! You've been watching too much of those hairy monsters I tell you! I should have stopped you! Now it is all my fault! Where did I go wrong?" Lorelai said in an over dramatic tone.
"Well I think it was when you told me to sit down on the couch and watch TV while you went to the bathroom or something." Rory said.
"Those five minutes! If only nature hadn't called me up and said 'hey, I'm calling' then you would have been fine! Those are the lost minutes of your life!" Lorelai said again being overdramatic.
"Like Shakespeare! Only less black plaguey." Rory said.
"Ok I am going to pretend I know what you're talking about. Hey what time is it?" Lorelai asked.
"Ah, it's five of six. Why? What time is Luke supposed to be home?" Rory asked.
"A little after 6. Hey babe I have to go. I will call you back later tonight. Ok?" she asked.
"Fine but make sure Luke is far away from you!" Rory demanded.
"That was one time!" Lorelai argued.
"And I will forever be scared by that moaning yelping sound! Now make sure Luke is in the other room!" she demanded.
"Fine. Listen I have to go. Bye babe." Lorelai said.
"Bye mom." Rory replied and then they both hung up.
Lorelai then pulled a dark blue silk tank top over her black lacey bra. Just then she heard the front door open.
"Lorelai?" she heard Luke call from the bottom of the stairs.
"Just a second!" she shouted as she quickly put on some eyeliner. "There! All done!" she said triumphantly to herself. She quickly turned around and walked out of the room towards the stairs. As she looked down, she saw Luke standing there smiling up at her.
"You look…wow!" he said speechlessly.
"Wow! And who thought a girl could get that without fancy formal wear?" she joked as she walked down the stairs.
"What?" he looked confused.
"Never mind. So we should go." she said changing the subject.
"Ah, yah, we should." he said. Lorelai walked over to the door and Luke followed. Luke grabbed her coat and put it on her.
"Oh! My big, strong diner man feels the need to help little old me put on my jacket." she joked.
"Well If the guys in white jackets can…" Luke joked.
"Hey! Do not pick on your child's mother! I will become emotional distraught, and then so will Jake who will then convert to a crack baby!" she reasoned.
"Aren't crack babies when you do crack while pregnant?" Luke asked.
"Maybe, but this way he will be unique! A new kind of crack baby!" she said with a smile on her face. She loved her little banters with Luke. They made the day so much more enjoyable.
"Oh, ok" Luke smiled and then kissed her. She was absolutely crazy, but that was what he liked about her. Loved about her. That was why he loved her. He then opened the door for her.
"Thank you sir" she said as Luke followed her out the door to the truck.
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It is short. I know this. But please review. I live off from them, and when people don't review, I think they either hate it, or that they just don't think it is worth their time. This, in a way, is the same thing. But it lowers my motivation to write more. This means that it takes longer for a chapter to be posted, and that makes everyone who does like my story, mad. And because of this, the world ends. So if you don't review. Then the world ends. It will be all your fault. So, please review. I appreciate any kind whether it is just a simple "I like it" or a three page essay on how to write a chapter properly. I just really want you to review and tell me what you think. Hate reviews are ok too. I would like to remind you who are thinking "the world won't end! This person is crazy! Why should I review?" but the answer to this is the angry mob, and the Penguins. They will haunt you in your sleep. They are like clowns. Terrifying.
REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW! (They give me the warm and fuzzies)
