Trigger Warning: This chapter contains graphic descriptions of mild violence as well as mentions of sexual harrassment.
Chapter VI
Donna doesn't even feel the need to turn around when she hears his drunken voice to know that Aaron is the one gripping her. She feels her spine shiver, the trembling traveling down to her limbs and she has to control herself in order to stay strong and not let him see how much panic and fear facing him actually causes her.
"What do you want, Aaron?" she hisses, as she forcefully tries to remove her arm from his hold. But his arms are bigger and stronger, and instead of breaking free, he uses her movement to pin her against a wall; and he presses his face closer to hers with a wicked grin, the drunk scent coming from his mouth filling the air.
"Well, I'm glad to see you haven't forgotten about me, ginger," he slurs as his fingers brush the roundness of her cheeks, and she flinches at the unwanted contact.
"Get off of me!" she shrieks, and she turns her face away from him. She tries to fight the strength of his arms, get away from his hold, but her attempts result futile as the man presses her harder against the wall.
"Come on, can't we have some fun like in the old times?" the man asks in a hushed tone, his left hand wandering around the hem of her dress and up into her leg. As soon as Donna feels his hand on her leg, she lets out a loud cry and reacts on instinct, focusing all her drive on squashing his foot with her right heel. The motion has its desired effect as Aaron backs away from her, and she gets the chance to free herself from his hold.
However as soon as he stands back, he draws out a small knife from his left pocket and pulls it in a swift move against her neck, backing her against the wall once more.
"Hey, hey, there's no need for such a fuss," he hushes, playing dangerously close with the knife against the skin of her neck. Donna feels her blood run cold as a sheer layer of cold sweat covers her brow, and the only thing she can focus on are his wicked, cold blue eyes. Despite the darkness and her panicked state, she notices the large and disproportionate size of his pupils and she can only guess that he might under the effect of some substance.
"Aaron, please," Donna begs, her jaw quivering. "I don't know what is it that you want, but please, get away from me!"
She watches as his smile widens in a rotten smirk, his eyes growing colder and devilish. "You lying bitch, you know very well what I want," he states as he withdraws the knife from her neck and begins groping her thigh, but at Donna's ringing screech he stops his hand coming up to grip her neck as she squirms in horror, "I want to see you suffer, ginger. I want you to rot in hell," he threatens. "It wasn't enough to destroy my reputation fourteen years ago, you had to go now and ruin my father's company too…" he pulled again the knife pressing it now against her right cheek, "I'm afraid you'll have to pay for the consequences of your actions…"
Donna feels the cool edge of the knife against her skin and panics. "You know very well that's not what happened," she stammers in a useless attempt to get him to back away from her, "I didn't do anything back then and I sure as hell didn't do anything now!"
"LIAR!" he roared as he pressed the knife in a slow motion, leaving a nasty cut on her right cheekbone. Her right hand immediately comes flying to her face, only to be stained with the blood the cut left behind.
"I-I swear Aaron, I didn't do anything…" Donna cries, as she tries in a weak attempt to loosen his hold on her, "If what you want is to seek revenge you already got it, I was fired from my job!" she implores.
"LIAR!" Aaron repeats again, drawing the knife now to her neck, placing it dangerously close to the aorta. "You're nothing more than a lying little piece of shit. You lied to me fourteen years ago and you're lying to me now."
Donna's eyes are wide in shock as she feels the cold sweat forming on her brow and focuses on the way Aaron plays with the knife and she has to hold back a whimper when she feels the tip of the instrument grazing her skin.
"Admit it Donna," he continues, "back then you stole those designs and sold them and now you send those emails, knowing, both times, that your actions would make my family's company fall. And the reason of why you did it was just because you never got over the fact that I didn't want to keep a relationship with you!"
Her face falls in horror at his statement, her stomach coiling up in a thousand knots and she can't help her body from shaking in frustration and agony. That was not what happened.
"You were the one who harassed me all the time," Donna defends, her voice coming out in a low howl, "you were the one that tried to manipulate me into sleeping with you and when I denied, you tried to incriminate me by making it look like I was the one who stole those designs." She tries to suppress the need of throwing up right there and then as she begins crying, "I swear Aaron I never did anything to hurt your family's company."
"Shut the fuck up!" Aaron screams, his face falling into a contorted and pained expression. Despite her fear, she catches the way he starts losing his nerves, his eyes fidgeting from one side of the alley to another, as if making sure no one is around to hear. Always afraid of maintaining his reputation, Donna remembers the façade he always kept back while she was working for him; and in that moment, she takes advantage of his distress to put up her knee to the middle of his abdomen and push him away, making him stumble backwards. She manages to take the knife out of his grip in a swift motion and throws it to the other side of the alley, the object fortunately falling down the gutter.
"So, you want to play it this way?" Aaron warns as he watches the knife fall down the drain. He composes himself quickly and throws himself towards her once again. With all the force he can muster, the businessman tackles her to the ground, making her knock the left side of her head against the pavement. He then proceeds to hit her hard, beating her body relentlessly, "this is what you deserve, you lying bitch!" he yells in wrath.
Donna loses consciousness for a brief moment when her head knocks hard on the pavement, and when she regains it back, she can't help the pain that begins forming on her left side, the faint smell of her own blood leaving her dizzy and confused. Aaron keeps hitting her, his fists punching her face, ribs and abdomen repeatedly, and she's sure he won't stop until he feels he's had enough. Although she tries to fight back, she's not strong enough to counterattack his vicious assault; plus, the hit on her head makes her movements feel uncoordinated and clumsy putting her at clear disadvantage.
All of a sudden, she feels the constant hitting relent if only a little, and for a moment she hopes he's had enough and decided to finish, but then, he proceeds to beat her between her ribs, striking directly on her diaphragm and therefore knocking the wind out of her, leaving her completely out of breath and lightheaded.
Once he sees the way she struggles to catch her breath, how her shaking hands come to clutch her chest and her eyes shut down in a pained grimace; he's sure she doesn't have the strength to keep fighting back. He then pulls up her red hair, swiftly lifting her from the ground and tosses her again against the wall with crack hard enough to ensure she losses consciousness for good this time.
He watches how the redhead slumps limply against the alley's wall, her head bleeding profusely from the knock on her head. There's blood all over her face, not only from the crack on her skull but also from the cut on her cheekbone.
As he walks away, he doesn't feel even the last bit of remorse for his actions, and he thinks that if Donna is smart enough, she will know better than to tell anyone about his attack.
Donna has no idea how much time has passed before she regains consciousness again. The first thing she becomes aware of is the excruciating pain building up on the left side of her head. She struggles to open her eyelids, only managing to lift them halfway up, her vision blurry and unfocused. However, the motion makes her pounding headache intensify, and it hurts so bad it makes her coil back on her fetal position, breathing hard to make it go away.
"H-help?" she croaks between shivering teeth, trying hard not to break down crying, as she forces her eyes open once more. Nevertheless, the alley where she's sprawled on remains deserted, and she takes notice of her handbag and left heel tossed away from her reach. Both items had landed on the floor at some point during her confrontation with Aaron and she can't reach them without moving from her laying position. She tries to get up, but even the smallest motion makes her ribs hurt in unbearable pain and her head spin relentlessly.
As she falls into the realization of her injured state, the anxiety doesn't fail to build up on her chest, as hopeless tears begin streaming down her pale cheeks. She feels on the edge, panic-stricken, frightened, physically and emotionally hurt. On top of it, she's in the middle of God only knows where without no idea of where to go or what to do…she always knows what to do…
That's the moment when she feels something break inside of her. The shock and wounds from the attack combined with the fatal anxiety she has been struggling with for the past few weeks have left her at her most vulnerable. She knew she couldn't carry like this anymore, she couldn't keep pretending everything was fine when it clearly wasn't. And now, as she's lying on the ground, wounded, jobless, alone, she finally understands how broken and damaged she really is. Her heart breaks into an intense sob that ransacks her whole body and makes her tremble so bad aggravating her already painful wounds. The only thing on her mind can produce to bring her some sort of comfort to her aching body is the memory of Harvey.
Why did she had to act so harsh with him when all he was trying to do was help?
Why did she let her pride take place and shut him out in the first place?
The sudden need for him makes her realize she needs to seek help right away. She needs to find a way to get out of here and back to him and apologize properly this time for all this mess.
She tries once more to rise from the ground, but the mere action of trying to sit up is enough to leave her seeing double and disoriented. The movement makes something in her ribs shift and she finds herself trying to catch her breath, failing miserably at it, as an insufferable sharp pain takes hold of her body and makes her whimper in agony.
The loud ringing in her ears and the torturing pounding in her head are the last things she remembers before her world succumbs to darkness once again.
The moment Harvey stepped onto the lobby on the first floor, there was no sign of Donna to be seen. She had already left, and he had no idea where to. He picked up his phone again and tried to call her, but he ran the same luck he's been having all day long and got no answer from her behalf.
His eyelids fall in frustration as he recalls the argument they had before she left. He wasn't able to gather much from what she told him, but it was enough to confirm the suspicions he's been fearing all afternoon. Faye was behind this, and goddamn it if he doesn't make that woman pay for taking away Donna's position.
He doesn't give it much of a thought when he finds himself climbing back to the fiftieth floor, his feet recklessly kicking towards the Special Master's office.
"If you're here because of Donna's resignation-" the blonde woman warns as he makes his way over to her desk.
"Damn right I'm here because of Donna's resignation," Harvey yells in desperation, "you had no damn evidence to prove Donna did anything wrong and you had no right whatsoever to take her away from her position-"
"First of all," Faye begins, "I did have proof. Here are the results from IT confirming that the documents were indeed sent from her email account." The blonde woman hands him the files, but Harvey makes no effort to take them, the look on his expression stoic, displaying his no-bullshitting attitude.
"Secondly, I didn't take anything away from her," Faye emphasizes, "she was the one who decided to resign, I didn't force her to do anything. She came to me and when I showed her the documents, she confessed to everything and voluntarily took the decision to resign. And honestly, I think it was the wisest choice, or do I need reminding you that she purposefully betrayed the interests of this firm when she sent confidential information to help the opposing counsel?"
"Then why the hell did she tell me you were threatening her?" Harvey retorts and he watches how the woman reclines back on her seat, an unnervingly calm serenity on her face.
"And why would I do that?" she challenges him back, "Be careful with those accusations Specter, you have no proof of such thing. And for the record, I would never threaten her or any other employee for that matter."
"God damn it, Faye!" he shouts as he slams his fist on her desk in frustration; the loud bang making the woman almost jump. "I don't know what you have against her, but I'm going to find out and once I do, I'll make sure you get out of our firm and crawl back to the hellhole you came from," he threatens, his voice low and grave, leaving no room for doubts.
His mind is spiraling out of control. The thought of Donna being in any type of danger has always awoken something primal in him, a sudden need to protect her at all costs and make whoever did her wrong pay for such crime. He's fueled by fear, he has no idea what has been going on with Donna, why on earth would she resign, or where the hell she went to; and so he manifests it the only way he knows how: anger. Anger towards the woman he believes to be responsible for her suffering, and if what Donna told him happens to be true; he'll have no problem making sure that woman rots in hell for the rest of her goddamned life.
"For someone who's so keen on accusing me of threatening employees, you're sure not afraid to jump in and make some threats of your own," Faye warns after a short pause, and the lawyer has to fight his instincts not to punch the woman right there and then.
"You might be here because the Bar Association put you in charge," he accuses, "but that doesn't give you the right to take away everyone's positions and shred us down to pieces. First Samantha and now Donna, are you planning to throw us all out one by one?"
"I can't believe it!" Faye scoffs, "All I'm doing is preventing this firm from becoming more corrupt than it already is. The reason because they are out, is simple: Samantha fabricated evidence, Donna gave away evidence to purposely damage a client's company. I don't know about you Harvey, but I can't simply allow that type of unethical behavior at this firm. However, you all simply assume that everything I do is because I have something personal against you. I get it, you may not like me, you may not like my job here, but I swear to god I don't have anything personal against you all."
"Bullshit you don't have anything personal against us!" Harvey thunders, "This has nothing to do with unethical behavior or keeping the interests of this firm. You made it crystal clear you had a problem with Donna ever since you tried to revoke her vote. You say you have nothing personal against her, or against any one of us, but I beg to differ." His angry, loud shouts fill the office, and he closes the distance as he positions himself near Faye's desk in a menacing pose, pointing an accusatory finger against her, a somber expression plastered on his face. "I have no idea what you did to convince her to resign but let me tell you the moment you decided to go after her, you made it personal with me, and believe me Faye, you do not want me as your enemy."
"Harvey, that's enough!" Harvey suddenly hears Alex loudly exclaim, and he stops himself when he feels the man's strong grip on his left shoulder, ushering him to get out of the Special Master's office before he does anything stupid.
He doesn't fail to read the urgency behind the black man's eyes, and when he spots Louis and Gretchen's nervous looks from across the office, and glances back to Faye's shocked expression, he realizes he might have overstepped the line, if only a little. He doesn't care though; Donna was forced to resign, he has no fucking idea where she has gone, he feels on the edge, and maybe all he needed right now was someone to blame for all this mess.
He gives Alex a short, hesitant nod, and takes his arm away from his grip before fixing his suit, "You've been warned," he states to the woman, throwing her a pointed, menacing look, as he makes his way out of her office.
"Shit, what are we going to do now?" Louis asks nervously, as he glances between Harvey and Alex. The three men had all reunited on the firm's rooftop – a place where surely Faye wouldn't overhear their conversation – to discuss Donna's mysterious resignation. Harvey explained them everything from the evidence Donna supposedly sent to the opposing counsel on Lowenstein's case to the threats Donna mentioned before leaving and her unknown whereabouts.
"Harvey, I think you need to talk to her. We need to know out what´s really going on, before we do anything" Alex dictates, taking the lead of the conversation. Harvey just nods quietly, casting his gaze to the floor as he takes a sip from his glass of scotch. "A while ago I had proposed Donna the idea of filing a lawsuit against Faye, it's clear she has something against strong women, but she just bit my head off and refused to do so. However, I think that after today she might reconsider the idea…"
"Sounds like a good plan," Louis comments back, "we need to take action before that woman dares to do something else to harm any one of us." He directs his attention to the tallest lawyer, "Harvey, do you have any idea where she is?"
"I don't know, Louis" Harvey answers, shaking his head forlornly, "I've been calling her phone, but I think the line's disconnected or something…she's just not picking up."
Louis and Alex share a concerned look. Harvey's temper had seemed to make a complete one hundred and eighty turn, going from the anger-fueled recklessly shouting man they had forced out of Faye's office, to a desperate, worried-sick boyfriend in only a couple of minutes. His now crestfallen demeanor seems uncommon to both men, and it gives them the impression that there's probably something else going on their relationship that he's not telling them about.
"Come on Harvey, she's probably just at her place," Alex tries to encourage him patting him on the back, "go talk to her and tomorrow we´ll plan the strategy to take down Faye."
Harvey simply clenches his jaw, nods in agreement and greets both men goodbye before picking up his coat and making them both promise to call him if they hear anything from Donna.
He's ready to leave, waiting for the elevator to come, when he sees Gretchen approach him, a certain air of assertiveness in her step.
"Harvey, before you go, there's something I need to tell you," the secretary declares in a serious tone.
"What is it, Gretchen?" Harvey asks.
"Look, I don't mean to intrude in your personal life with Red by any means, but after today's mess I think there's something you should really know," she looks down to the floor and back at Harvey, unsure on how to proceed, but continuing anyway. "Earlier today, Donna had a meeting with Faye. I guess it must have gone wrong or something, because I found her crying in the ladies' room and well…she was having a panic attack."
She lets the information sink in, Harvey's stoic expression abruptly breaking down into a million pieces. She notices the way his eyes go dark, his eyelids falling in aggravation, his jaw clenches and he tenses his shoulder, closing in his fists, as if trying to contain himself; all signs that this is probably the first time he's hearing about it.
"I helped her through it with some breathing exercises, and once she calmed down, she made me promise to keep quiet about it," Gretchen continues, the lawyer carefully paying attention to her every word. "She didn't want anyone to know, although I did advise her she should speak with you about them…"
The ding of the elevator announces its arrival, and Harvey nods slowly, his concerned glance silently thanking for the information as his mind is still trying to process and make sense of it. He remembers the comment Louis had made earlier about sending Donna home because she looked sick, and he puts the pieces together, guessing he probably referred to this.
"Thanks Gretchen…for helping her and for telling me now," he murmurs after a short pause, and the secretary doesn't fail to the hint of fear behind his tone, "I'll talk to her."
She nods, a tight smile on her face and adds before he steps into the elevator's car, "Oh, and Harvey…this isn't the first time Faye has threatened her."
He feels like he's in a daze as he climbs into Ray's car and orders the driver to take him to his place.
Gretchen's revelation had definitely caught him by surprise, but when he starts thinking about the uncharacteristic behavior Donna's been displaying for the past few weeks, he reasons that it shouldn't at all. Her stress induced insomnia, her sudden lack of appetite, her bad mood and weak demeanor were all indicators that there was something wrong, but he never thought it would be bad enough for her to be having panic attacks.
He feels like shit. He should've found about it sooner, before this whole resignation fiasco started. He should've tried harder to get Donna to open up about her issues when he noticed something was off, instead of finding out by someone else. However, as he feels his chest grow heavy with guilt, one question is stuck on his mind:
Why didn't she say anything?
It breaks him already enough to think about her dealing with panic attacks on her own, but the thought of her trying to hide that information from him, surely shatters him. Because of his own experience with mental health issues, he knows how difficult it is to cope with anxiety, and he's aware that bottling it up and closing off, only makes matters worse. He can't even begin to imagine how scared and defeated she must be feeling and the fact that she has been so adamant about handling them on her own, and not having anyone find out concerns him.
He's always been aware that, although she plays superwoman for everyone else, she has a hard time when it comes to herself, but he thought she knew she could come to him if there was ever something wrong. She had promised him she would, and the fact that she purposefully chose not to, pains him to his core.
They need to talk, and this time, he's not letting her walk away before he gets some real answers.
He goes back to his penthouse to change, quietly hoping to find her there, but when he finds the lights are still off that hope quickly fades away. He changes into a light sweater, a suede jacket and some chino pants, and immediately makes his way to her place.
He arrives about fifteen minutes later and doesn't even bother greeting the receptionist as he takes the stairs and makes his way to the twelfth floor. She had given him a key a while ago, but he hasn't used it that much since they've been spending most of their time at his place. As he makes his way inside, he flickers the lights on, urgently calling for her name, but gets no answer in return. He wanders through the place, and aside from the wine bottle sitting on the countertop of the kitchen aisle, nothing else seems out of place, and there's no other sign that she has been there.
Panic creeps through his chest. If she's not here or at his place, he has no fucking idea where she could be. His mind races producing a list of her favorite cafés, restaurants and spots around the city and possible colleagues or friends she might've called.
He starts making calls, getting in contact with their friends at the firm asking if anyone has gotten any news from her but their responses are all negative. He calls a few of her favorite restaurants too, asking if anyone under the name of Donna Paulsen had made a reservation there, or if they have seen anyone that matches her appearance, but then again no one is able to provide any information. He thinks it might be a good idea to call some of her friends and acquaintances outside of work, but unfortunately, he doesn't have any of their numbers…if only Rachel was in New York, he wouldn't have to be playing guessing games to know where she is…
After a couple more of useless calls here and there, he runs out of all possible contacts that may know anything about her whereabouts and flops down on her couch, resting his head on his hands in discouragement. He should have stopped her from leaving back at the firm and he curses himself for not doing so. But wallowing in self-pity isn't going to get him anywhere, and instead tries to think logically. If she's out somewhere, eventually she will have to come back to her place, and so he will wait here for her.
However, uneasiness sits heavy on his chest, and his mind can't stop feeding him with the worst possible scenarios, urging him to make sure that wherever she is at, she is okay.
It is only then that he remembers there's someone he hasn't called yet, and the thought of it gives him, if any, a little hope. He flicks his phone open and dials Samantha's number. After tonight's events, it would make sense for Donna to look out for the only other person who has also been fired by Faye, plus he's aware of the strong bond the two women had formed over the last year, and, considering Rachel's absence, she's probably his best shot at trying to find her.
"Samantha, please tell me you have heard anything from Donna tonight," he pleads as soon as the blonde lawyer answers the phone, desperation clearly palpable on his voice.
Samantha is caught by surprise the moment she picks up the phone; it's been over a month since she was fired and in all this time, she hasn't heard a lot from anyone at the firm, let alone form Harvey himself. So, when she takes the call only to find a frantic and desperate Harvey asking for Donna, she's sure something truly serious must've happened.
"Hey, Harvey…uhm no" she answers his question immediately, concern flickering through her tone. She has never heard the lawyer so despairing and hopeless for that matter, and when the only thing she hears in return is his heavy exhale with a muttered curse, she can't help but ask further, "Harvey what's going on?"
He takes a shaky breath, the hope of finally knowing what happened with Donna disappearing as he exhales it. If Samantha hasn't heard from her either, he has no fucking idea where she is, and his gut feeling can't help but keep telling him something wrong is going on.
"Harvey, what the hell happened?" Samantha presses at his sudden silence, and although he's tired out of his mind of going through the same story once again, he feels compelled to share it with her.
He starts telling her everything surrounding Donna's unexplained and sudden resignation, from Faye's bullshit accusations, going through the outcome at today's trail and the supposed email that proved Donna sent fabricated evidence to damage a client's company, to the fact that Donna straight out told him that Faye had been threatening her all along before completely disappearing. He doesn't omit his worries on how he's noticed she hasn't been acting like herself lately and even mentions the panic attack Gretchen had informed him about, which only adds to his concern about her unknown whereabouts.
Samantha listens to him attentively, without any sort of interruption; but when he casually mentions that the case in which Donna allegedly sent evidence to the opposite counsel was Lowenstein's, she interrupts him with a sudden halt.
"Wait, let me get this straight, you took Aaron Lowenstein as a client!?" she asks in a rush, making a notable emphasize on the client's name.
"Yes, I took it as a request from Faye; she wanted me to represent him in a copyright claim against his company," Harvey explains, Samantha's exasperated reaction increasing his own worry.
"Shit, Harvey…you have no idea what you've gotten yourself into!"
"What?! What do mean by that? Do you know something about him?"
"Unfortunately, yes. I used to have a friend who had worked for his company a while ago," Samantha explains, taking a deep breath before continuing. "She worked for the technology development department, and she told me that Lowenstein had this tendency to harass his female workers, and if he didn't get his way with them, he would start mistreating them, being verbally and physically abusive towards them, and on some occasions, he would even fire them for no reason at all. I tried to convince her to file a lawsuit against him when she got fired for this exact same reason, but he ended up paying her a huge amount of money in order to silence her and she took it. Apparently, he has silenced every woman who has ever attempted to accuse him and that's why his record seems clean, but Harvey this man is shady as hell."
"Holy Shit, Motherfucker-"
His eyes widen as his brow furrows in fear and confusion, and he feels his gut wrenching as he presses harder the edges of his phone. Since the beginning there was something about Aaron that didn't sit right with him at all, he always knew his overly polite attitude felt fake and overly acted. He remembers the way the man violently grabbed him and screamed at him when they lost the trial earlier today, and the information that Samantha just revealed seems to confirm his suspicions about the man.
However, if what Samantha is telling him is true, that means that Donna must have gone through something similar while working for that man, and at the mere thought of her having to deal with that kind of treatment makes him feel sick to the stomach. Before his mind can even begin processing the implications of Samantha's confession, he hears her ask on the other side of the line.
"You said it was Lowenstein the one who told Faye, Donna had sent the emails with evidence to the opposing counsel, right?"
"Uh-, yes," he confirms, still feeling the shock of the information sitting heavy on his chest.
"And since Donna left, she hasn't picked up any of your calls and you're sure no one has heard anything from her?" she asks, a bit more urgently this time.
He confirms again, distress growing heavy on his chest at her constant questioning, "why'd you ask?"
"Harvey, I don't want you to panic," she tries to warn him beforehand; a useless tactic as the man is already anxiously pacing through Donna's living room, "but I think you should call the police. If Lowenstein is involved in this, and considering his history, I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to contact her in some way or another to seek revenge, especially since you're telling me that Donna worked for him over a decade ago."
"Are you saying that-?"
"What I'm saying is, there's a chance that Donna could be at risk right now."
"God-damn it, Samantha, we need to do something!"
His stomach sinks deep, and the uneasy gut feeling that's been pressing on him ever since Donna left the firm, tightens, hollowness growing deeper on his chest. He's left frozen right on spot, his breathing getting shallower and more labored. He knew something was wrong the second he didn't find her at her place, and the possibility that Donna is in some kind of danger, either because of Faye or Lowenstein, makes all the fire alarms inside his brain go insane.
It feels like today he's been informed of things he had no idea about, first with Faye's threats, then with the revelation of her panic attacks, and now with the possible threat of Lowenstein causing her some sort of harm. His first reaction is hating himself for it, because he had noticed there had been something wrong with Donna for the past few weeks, but he had failed miserably at trying to get her to open up, and he loathes the fact that he's only finding out because of someone else told him, and not her. They're together now, he's supposed to be person she trusts with this kind of stuff, not the one she runs away from, and he can't help but begin wondering what the hell he did wrong. However, as much as he feels like his mind is spiraling right now, he knows he needs to remain rational and instead focuses on the only thought clear on this mind; he needs to find her right now.
Since Donna was pressed with charges on the Liberty Rail case, he has never felt this scared for her life and safety, and his urge to protect her at any costs emerges stronger than ever.
"God-damn it, Harvey, I need you to listen!" Samantha's loud tone over the phone brings his attention back at her, and it is only then that he realizes he had spaced out for a couple of minutes and started hyperventilating, lost in his own shock. "Harvey!" he hears her again, and her angry shouts have the desired effect, forcing him to get out of his personal spiral and instead focusing on what they need to do in order to find her.
He grunts something in response, still feeling too startled to elaborate a proper answer.
"Here's what we're going to do: I'm going to call the police and report her as missing, but they won't start properly investigating until twenty-four hours have passed, so we'll need to start a search party of our own," Samantha orders urgently, "I'll meet you outside the firm in twenty minutes, okay?"
Harvey nods in agreement and mutters a strangled 'thank you' as he makes his way out of Donna's place. He feels so goddamned angry, the thought of Donna being in any type of risk, blinds his judgment with a frenzy rage that takes control over his body, and he has to control himself in order not put a hole through the first wall he sees. He orders Ray to take him back to the firm and on the way there he texts Louis, letting him know the information on Lowenstein Samantha had shared with him and their plan to start a search party. The balding lawyer's reaction is no less worried and hysteric than he had expected, and it only serves to increase his own frightened and panicked state.
When he arrives to the firm once again, he's surprised to find not only Samantha and Louis, but to spot Alex, Gretchen and Katrina also there, and he guesses that Louis must've told them about the situation as soon as they hang up. The fact that they all came because they care about Donna makes him feel, if any, a little better, but the uneasiness on his chest will surely remain until he makes sure she's truly okay.
Samantha informs them all that she spoke with a couple of contacts she has at the station and that they promised they'll start looking out for her; still, she suggests they start a search party on their own. They make a list of all possible places where Donna could be and they agree to break into pairs, in order to cover as much area as possible.
Harvey is joined by Samantha, who offers to be his partner and she proposes they start looking near Lowenstein's company administrative offices on lower Manhattan. As he climbs back to Ray's car with Samantha by his side, his mind can't help but come up with the worst scenarios, his soul growing heavy with panic at the mere thought of her being in any sort of risk, and he fights every fiber of his being not to let himself fall down that rabbit hole and instead focus on what he needs to do.
He would do whatever it takes to find her.
It's been three hours – three fucking hours – since they started the searching party looking for Donna, and so far, no one's been lucky enough to find her. Harvey and Samantha have covered almost every corner of Lower Manhattan without any sign from her. Louis and Gretchen have been visiting some bars and restaurants near the firm, and Katrina and Alex have been going over some other public places, but none of them has found any trace of her, and by now they are all getting really worried.
Samantha's friends at the station have already contacted them and they asked Harvey to give a statement about the last place where she was seen, her physical appearance, what was she wearing and some other basic information. They promise to start raiding the area near the firm, but they remind them that the police department won't start any official investigation until twenty-four hours have passed, so they recommend him to go home and get some sleep since in these types of cases the missing person will probably show up at their homes by their own means before the twenty-four-hour mark.
Harvey is getting restless and despondent at the lack of action from the police department, and when a young female police officer notices his attitude, she asks if they have already tried tracking her phone. He curses at himself internally as he listens the request and feels foolish for not thinking about it sooner. Donna had installed on both their phones some kind of tracking app quite some time ago in case anything ever happened to them, and so he fishes his iPhone out of his pocket, looking for said app.
The police officer helps him using the app and enters some kind of code that give them access to the location of Donna's phone. However, the app reveals the device is currently off – probably because it's run out of battery – but at least it displays the last location it was on, and that is enough for Harvey to decide he won't miss the opportunity to try to find her. The police officers instruct him to call them if they happen to find her and offer to send patrol car if needed.
Samantha thanks them for their help as she makes her way behind Harvey and into Ray's car. Inside the vehicle she finds a frantic Harvey ordering Ray to take them to the location the app is suggesting, and she has to remind the lawyer to breathe, as he starts hyperventilating once more; the distress of not knowing where Donna is, surely eating him alive.
It takes them about half an hour to arrive to the location the app displayed. They're in a part of Manhattan they don't usually frequent, and Harvey wonders why or how the hell Donna ended up near here. However, as they scan the area, they don't find any trace of her. The lonely street doesn't offer much as most buildings nearby are closed, and there seems to be no one wandering around. He's tempted to order Ray to turn back, when he notices near the alley, the silhouette of a familiar Manolo patent-leather heel discarded on the floor.
His chest expands with hope as he rushes out of the car, and into the street to pick up the item noticing the Hermès bag sitting next to it. However, when he rises his gaze to scan the dark alley, the sight that greets him, makes his heart almost stop beating.
Donna's crumpled form is lying on the cold hard ground of the dead-end alley, and he doesn't even have to think twice to rush towards her side, crying out her name, Samantha following closely behind.
She seems unconscious and he kneels next to her, frantically calling for her name, as he tucks away gently the red hair that's blocking her face from him. The moment he lays eyes on her features though, he almost breaks down. Her beautiful face is covered in blood, and he notices the profuse bleeding coming out of the left side of her head as well as the nasty cut on her right cheekbone. His eyes scan the marks left on her neck, chest and arms, all signs that someone had beaten her up.
"Donna, Donna!" he yells in desperation, as he gently taps on her cheek, careful not to hurt her even more, but with enough pressure to try to make her come back into consciousness. However, Donna's body remains still and he slowly cradles her up in his arms, lightly shaking her shoulders in a helpless attempt as he tries to contain the tears that threaten to fall.
"Harvey, we need to call an ambulance, she's bleeding too much," he hears Samantha instruct as she takes out her phone, already dialing 911, "you need to apply pressure on her head."
He does exactly as told and takes out the handkerchief on his left pocket, folds it, and applies it hard on her left side, trying to prevent the bleeding to expand out even more than it already has. The white material quickly turns crimson red, and he wonders if headwounds are meant to bleed this much.
His heart beats fast on his chest, and he reminds himself he needs to keep in control in order to be able to help Donna. Of all the terrible scenarios his mind could've produced, this is definitely the worst. The weight of her unconscious limp body on his arms is agonizing and he realizes he has never felt so goddamned terrified and angry in his entire life.
Anxiety pumps through his veins, and he feels his heart on his throat. He's furious with whomever dared to lay a finger on her, but he also feels responsible for letting all of this happen to her. He should've stopped her from leaving the firm when he had the chance, damn it, he should've been more aware of everything that was happening the moment he noticed something was off with her. But he pushes those thoughts aside knowing they won't get him anywhere; right now, the only thing he needs to focus on is making sure she's okay.
He needs her to be okay.
"Donna, Donna, please wake up!" he hopelessly implores as he keeps tapping over her cheek. Her skin feels cold and clammy, and he worries the headwound must have caused some sort of damage and that's why she's not waking up. He checks for her breathing; it feels shaky and raspy, and her pulse is slower and weaker than it should, but at least those signs remind him that she's alive – maybe not okay – but alive, and right now that's all he needs.
Samantha stays close enough to let him know he can count on her for support, but also gives him the space she knows he needs with Donna right now. Finding Donna all beaten up, and unconscious in a dark alley far from the firm is definitely the last scenario she had imagined; the way she's bleeding is concerning, and she can't even begin to wander what Harvey must be feeling right now.
The dispatcher had instructed her to keep a steady pressure on her headwound and to constantly check for her breathing and pulse – both things that Harvey has already done – and he promised the ambulance would be arriving in fifteen minutes maximum. She checks her phone and realizes she should probably also alert the police and their friends, but the reception on the alley is deficient and so she excuses herself to go call outside the alley.
Harvey nods in agreement, and he turns his attention towards Donna once again, cradling her cold body in his arms in the gentlest way possible. She still hasn't shown any signs of waking up, and the longer she remains unconscious the more worried he gets. The fact that the ambulance hasn't arrived doesn't seem to ease his worries.
It's only a few moments later after Samantha has left, that he hears a soft but pained whimper coming out from Donna, and he tugs her arm softly, coaxing her to wake up. He notices the small pulls from her face, and the effort it takes for her to open her eyes.
"Don, can you hear me?" he questions as places his hand again on her cheek, shaking it slightly, another pained whimper escaping her lips.
Her eyes fly open, and she struggles to make out the form standing in front of her. He watches how she lifts her eyelids only half-way, but her beautiful hazel eyes looking back at him seem disoriented and her gaze distant.
His brow furrows as worry creeps on his chest, "Don?" he mumbles softly lifting her chin with his thumb.
"H…H-Harv-?" she musters, after a few moments, her raspy voice coming only above a whisper. With great effort, her shaky hand coming to rest on his cheek, as if checking if he's really there. He takes her icy hand in his and brings himself closer to her, relief washing through his veins as his warmth radiates her body.
"Hey, hey, shh, it's okay I'm here," he tries to reassure, somehow mustering a soft and calm tone. She looks back at him, a million questions written on her eyes, and nods slowly, confusion creeping on her as she tries to make sense of her own physical state.
He doesn't fail to notice the way her body starts shaking violently, her breathing becoming labored, and he starts taking off his suede jacket before asking, "Are you cold?" He doesn't even wait for an answer as he envelopes her cold shaking body on his jacket, and he hears a soft hum in response, as a sad, small, smile grazes her features.
He copies her smile in what he hopes looks like a reassuring one as he cups her cheek, "don't worry, you'll be fine."
Donna slowly becomes aware of the physical and emotional pain she's in, images of Faye's threats and insults, her forced resignation and Lowenstein's attack languidly flooding her mind. She groans as the pain on her head and ribs becomes more acute, and a lone, unwanted tear travels down her cheek, "M' s-sorry," she murmurs shakily, her features falling apart into a heartbreaking sob.
His heart breaks when he hears her confession and although he knows she's probably referring to the argument they had before she left the firm and all the mess regarding her resignation, it shatters him to his core to hear her so hurt and broken. They need to talk, and they will, but right now it's not the place or time for it.
"Hey, it's okay," he soothes as he rubs a gentle hand on her pale cheek, "there's nothing to apologize for, okay? An ambulance is on the way, and you'll be fine. Everything will be alright, you hear me?"
"An a-ambulance?" she stutters as she repeats the word, the thought of being poked and prodded by strangers makes her feel anxious and her breathing becomes agitated and shallow, "H-Harvey I-I d-don't want-"
"Shh, shh, slow down," he gently instructs as soon as he sees the distress on her face, and he rubs soothing circles on her shoulder trying to get her to calm down. "Samantha is calling for an ambulance because your head is bleeding too much," he explains slowly locking his eyes on her, silently asking her to trust him. He thinks she gets his message because her eyes fix on his, nodding her head sluggishly and soon enough her breathing begins to slow down. However, the slight movement of her head seems to aggravate the pounding headache, and she lets out a low moan as her hand flies up to her left side on top of his.
"Don, what's wrong?" he asks as soon as he watches her face contort with pain and break in a cold sweat.
"I-I don't know…m-my head hurts a lot" she tries to explain, struggling with breathlessness as she speaks, "…I d-don't feel g-good…"
Her face seems to have gone a few shades paler, and her breathing seems to become ragged once more, the bleed on her head growing more profuse. His hand goes straight to check her pulse, and he worries when he finds it feels slower and weaker than before. He applies more pressure on her wound, not caring when she lets out a yelp, he needs to stop the bleeding before the paramedics arrive. "Can you tell me where else are you hurt?" he asks urgently.
"M-my head…my ch-chest…my ribs…" she lists, taking sharp breaths between each word, "b-but n-nothing feels broken."
"It's okay, you'll be okay," he tries to reassure, but it comes out more like a strangled plead and he's sure Donna can hear the anguish and despair on his voice. "Just hold on until the ambulance arrives, alright?"
She feels her body giving up, the pain from her wounds consuming every last bit of energy and it feels like she's withering away against her own will. She shuts her eyes, trying to manage to the pain and not let the exhaustion taker her away – but gosh everything hurts so much – she's not sure how much longer she can hang on. "Har-vey, I don't f-feel o-okay…" she repeats again, her eyes attempting to close without her permission.
"Don-, hey please, I need you here with me alright?" his brow creases with worry, hands on her cheeks coaxing her to stay with him.
Harvey's worried and caring touch on her face is and she forces her eyes open, "D-don't l-leave me…" her jaw quivers, as tears escape her eyes and she begins sobbing, the emotions she's kept at bay crashing down on her all at once, "m' scared…"
"Donna, Donna!" he sobs as her eyes flutter close, and her body becomes slack on his arms. He frantically shakes her cheeks, her shoulders, anything to make her stay with him, "please, don't leave me. Please, stay with me!"
In the distance he hears the ambulance's sirens arrive and Samantha's bossy voice rings on his ears as the paramedics make their way over them and take her away from his arms.
