Ha! Ducky's back after almost two weeks without updating or even speaking to any of you fine people! Am I crazy? Wait, don't answer that. ok, so I have been quite busy lately, and now that I'm doing track (please kill me), I won't be on as much as I am now, so that means I'll be on maybe once a month...maybe two times a year...no, I just won't be on during weekdays and I won't have anytime to write on weekdays. Of course, that's what the weekend is for, right? Anyway, I won't go into rant mode, no matter how much some of you love Ducky rants. If you want a rant, bring up track in your review and I'll go on for days. Oh, and my splints off now, but my finger still hurts. OOOO! And thisis chapter 20! Yay!

Disclaimer: I'm sorry, but I had to borrow money to buy peppermint tea and some apples at the store, so why do you think I own Gilmore Girls?

Chapter 20: Life PushedHer Down the Stairs

"Hun. Hun." Lorelai heard someone say as she felt her body being shaken.

"What? Sookie?" she asked as she finally recognized the voice she was hearing.

"Yeah, hey, what happened?" Sookie asked. "Were you thinking about the baby again?" she clarified. She could obviously tell that Lorelai had been crying.

"No. I wasn't thinking about the…the baby." Lorelai stammered. It was so hard to think about her present situation right now. How could she with the way it had turned out?

"Then what happened?" Sookie asked gently while stroking her best friend's arm.

"It was Luke." Lorelai answered quietly as she sat up, trying to recall the events of the day.

"Luke? What did he do?" Sookie asked. She was being so sweet. And she had a family that she needed to get home to.

"He…he accused me of cheating on him, and then I kicked him out." she stammered, still shocked about the whole ordeal.

"You kicked him out? Like for the night, or the week, or--" she stopped when she saw the serious look on Lorelai's face. "oh." she said quietly.

"Yeah." Lorelai responded as she looked down at her hands that were the first thing she thought to look at in avoidance to Sookie's glance. "Sookie, why don't you go home?" Lorelai suggested. She didn't want to be the reason why Jackson got angry.

"But you need me here. That's what friends are for." she said excitedly.

"Well you have a family. You have a husband and two kids at home. They're probably starving too. Why don't you go home and I'll talk to you tomorrow?" Lorelai specified. She really needed time to think by herself.

"You sure, cause I can stay if you need." Sookie said, giving Lorelai's hand a pat. "I'm sure. You go home and spend sometime with Jackson." Lorelai said.

"Ok. So I'll see you at work tomorrow?" Sookie asked.

"I'm gonna take the day off tomorrow, but I might stop by to talk."

"Ok, well I'll see you tomorrow." Sookie said gently.

"Bye Sookie." Lorelai said as Sookie made her way to the door.

"Ok, bye Hunny." Sookie said as she opened the door and left the house.

Why do I have to make life so complicated for myself? Why do I have to jump to conclusions? Always be in control? Hide my feelings? Keep secrets? Give up. I gave up? Well yeah! You gave up when you threw Luke out! You just couldn't handle it anymore and you just let it go. You gave up! I did not! You did too! No, I didn't. That's final, go bug someone else!

------------------------------

"Mom! What are you doing?" Rory asked in astonishment as she saw her mother outside on the porch. The thing that caught Rory by surprise was the fact that it was 5:30 in the morning, and Lorelai was fully dressed, and drinking a cup of coffee. A day had passed and Rory had come to check up on her mother.

"Well drinking coffee is one of the dozen answers I could use." Lorelai answered dryly.

"Mom, Sookie called me this morning. She said that she didn't get a chance last night to call, and that you were having some trouble with Luke again. What happened?" Rory asked with concern. Rory slowly lowered herself down onto the step, right next to Lorelai.

"Life. Life happened Rory. Which is ironic seeing as it was all triggered by the loss of life." she said as she tried to hold back tears.

"Mom, what happened?" Rory asked again, only this time, a little quieter.

"Luke accused me of cheating." Lorelai said while more tears escaped her eyes.

"Oh Mom." Rory comforted softly as she held her mother in her arms. Lorelai had now put down the coffee and had her head in her hands. Lorelai quickly looked up.

"He accused me of cheating, and then I kicked him out." she added.

"But I'm sure he'll be back today to talk." Rory said hopefully.

"No, I threw him out. For good. He's not coming back. And then I told him about the baby, and he tried to apologize. But I just wouldn't let him." Lorelai sobbed. "I'm always screwing things up!" she exclaimed. She let another couple tears flow down her cheek.

"Well just call him up and tell him to come over. Just to talk." Rory suggested.

"But I'm not sure if I want him back. I mean, I love him, but we are always getting into these types of fights, and we are always second guessing each other, and I don't think that we're meant to be anymore!" Lorelai exclaimed.

"Don't say that mom. You know you are. Eight years of friendship, a total of one year of dating, which adds up to nine years of happiness. You know you are meant to be. Don't question this mom. Don't. Think of all those happy times. Think of all those wonderful memories. I know that you are tired of all of this stuff, but every couple has its rough times. Give it another try Mom." Rory pleaded.

"I can't Rory. I can't. I can't get hurt again. I just can't. And I know it's not fair to Jake. It's not fair to me. It's not fair to Luke. I just can't Rory. If only you knew the pain that this situation has put me in." Lorelai said, her eyes showing clearly the pain she felt.

"Mom, Luke is clearly hurt by this. He was throwing Kirk out of the diner when I drove by this morning. That's not normal. Luke only throws Kirk out when he is either drunk, hurting, or both. You know that. Mom, Luke deserves a chance." Rory tried to persuade.

"No he doesn't. It's not fair to me! He accused me of cheating! Again! He accused me of cheating again Rory. And is getting together just to break up later on, any more fair?" Lorelai asked.

"No it's not. But that's not going to happen." Rory tried to convince her mother.

"How can you tell? Can you promise me that Rory?" she asked.

"Mom." Rory said.

"Rory!" Lorelai exclaimed.

"Ok, fine. I'll leave it, but remember what I said. What about Jake? I mean are you and Luke going to share custody? Are you going to even let him see Jake?" Rory asked.

"I can't cut Jake off from his father. But I don't want to have to give Luke weekends, or every Friday, or every other day." Lorelai said as she wiped away her tears.

"So like you did with dad?" Rory asked.

"I guess. But he'll be bit closer, and the visits will be more frequent. I just don't know how I can handle seeing him. I have to let him see Jake, but him being near me will just hurt me even more than now. I don't want to hurt anymore Rory. I don't." Lorelai said to her daughter.

"I guess I could put a transportation system together when I'm in town. You know, bring him to Luke's, bring him home. How does that sound?" Rory proposed.

"It sounds good, but you're not always here. What about then?" Lorelai asked.

"We can think about it then." Rory said.

"Ok." Lorelai said. She picked up her coffee and took a few sips of it as both she and Rory stared off into space. Finally Lorelai broke the silence. "So where is Jake?" she asked.

"He and Martha had a play date today, remember?" Rory asked.

"That's right. So you're free today? No work, no Paris, no geeks with motorcycles?" Lorelai joked.

"No, not today." Rory answered, choosing to ignore the 'geeks with motorcycles' comment.

"So what do ya want to do?" Lorelai asked, trying to push the past few days behind her, and forget about them for at least an hour or two.

"I don't know. Maybe some shopping." Rory suggested.

The last time we went shopping, it was with Luke. I remember, we went to the mall…and then…and then…we ran into my mother. Lorelai thought.

"Luke! Please! Please Luke! Please, please, please!" Lorelai begged. It had been a month since Luke had found out about the baby. Three weeks before everything fell apart.

"No." he answered.

"Please! Rory, help me here!" Lorelai demanded as she turned to Rory who was standing on the other side of her.

"I'm staying out of this." Rory replied.

"Fine." Lorelai pouted. She turned to Luke.

"Oh stop! You know I can't resist the pout." he said to her. Lorelai just smiled.

"I know. And I thought that in this case it might come in handy. So will you?" she asked again excitedly.

"Fine, but one more. That's final. One more hour and then we leave." he said, gesturing wildly to emphasize his point.

"Yay!" Lorelai celebrated as she jumped up and down. Rory laughed while Luke rolled his eyes.

"Let's go!" Rory said excitedly. Lorelai and Rory then dragged Luke to the nearest baby store. Both women were laughing as Luke tried to pretend to resist their pulling, but he enjoyed is secretly. When the finally came close Luke sighed. And then he saw her. He saw her. Lorelai saw Luke stop abruptly.

"What?" she asked and then turned around to face what he was looking at. "Mom?" she asked.

"Lorelai? Rory? Luke." she asked, and said Luke's name with disgust. Luke and Lorelai both picked up on this.

"What are you doing here?" Lorelai asked in disbelief.

"This is a mall isn't it?" Emily asked.

"Yes but--" Lorelai tried to answer.

"And the mall, isn't it a public place?" Emily asked again.

"Yes it is, but--" Lorelai tried to speak again.

"So that's why I'm here." Emily said as if it was normal for her to be in a mall.

"I meant what are you doing here at this store?" she asked. She then noticed the bags she was carrying. "And what did you buy in there?" Lorelai asked with a smile on her face. Her mother had been in that store buying baby things.

"What does it matter to you?" Emily asked hostilely. Lorelai ignored her mother's sudden rudeness.

"Because you just walked out of a baby store, I doubt you are friends with any pregnant woman, so who is that stuff for?" Lorelai asked with a knowing smile on her face.

"Fine it's for you." Emily said, giving up the fight. She then changed the subject. "So I take it you told Luke?" she said in a rude tone. She really could turn that switch off and on couldn't she?

"Yes, I did. And he didn't run, and I won't run, and you won't cause either of us to run." Lorelai said to her mother. She would not let her mother screw anything up this time.

"I didn't say anything Lorelai." he mother said offended.

"I know you didn't, but I was just telling you ahead of time." Lorelai retorted. Luke saw a chance to break this little invisible fight up.

"Hey, well we have to go, so we'll see you later Mrs. Gilmore. Bye." he said as he pushed Lorelai towards the store.

Lorelai remembered that day and how it only had gotten better after that. And then she realized how she had even talked to her mother since then. How her mother would love the news that Luke and Lorelai were no longer together. Maybe she should go see her mother. Wow! Where did that come from? I guess I just feel the need to talk to my mother. Oh! The baby! She doesn't know. Crap! She's going to be so disappointed. She was so excited for another grandchild, no matter how little she showed it.

"Hey, do you have dinner with the grandparents this Friday?" Lorelai asked.

"Yeah, why?" Rory replied.

"What do you think of me going?" Lorelai asked.

"How many times did you fall down the stairs?" Rory asked.

-----------------------------

Hehe, so how many times did you fall down the stairs? It's not my fault! Life pushed me! Do you see where the title comes from? Life's a bitch isn't it? Anyway, so here is my lovely little chapter 20. Again, sorry it took so long. Reviews would actually be quite nice. Tell me, what's your favorite color? What's YOUR favorite Sesame Street character? I really like the Cookie Monster and Elmo, but which do you like? And hey, brownies or cookies? Which do you like the best?

Please review, I'm still sore from running almost five miles yesterday, so please make the pain go away with a review. Yes, for each review I get, the less painful it is to walk down those stairs so I don't trip and fall. I'll stop now.

REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!