II. The Everglots, Part 1

The door swung open, and standing in the doorway was the Everglots' butler, Emile. Looking as stuffy and condescending as ever, too. He'd left that night three years ago when the dead walked in the square, but had come running back as soon as Victoria's parents started receiving their hefty monthly allowance from Van Dort's Fish. Being better paid evidently didn't do much for his demeanor.

Emile regarded Victor and Victoria down the length of his nose. Nobody said anything. Victor couldn't recall how it had started, but somehow this kind of drawn-out awkward pause had become a bit of a ritual whenever the two of them visited Finis and Maudeline. Perhaps it made Emile feel good about himself to lord it over "Mr. and Mrs." Van Dort whenever they came to call. If I were titled, Victor thought for what felt like the thousandth time, this would definitely not happen. But it really didn't matter. Victor just didn't enjoy silent battles of wills very much. Victoria seemed to weather it better than he did.

As the pause stopped being merely drawn-out and became ridiculous, Victoria finally said, "Good afternoon, Emile. Are my parents in?" She was using what Victor liked to call her "respectable voice"--the one that made her sound every inch a woman who'd grown up with a title.

"Yes, indeed. They're expecting you," the butler answered, moving aside so that they could enter. As they crossed the threshold into the dark gloom of the entry, Victor and Victoria shared a confused look.

"Expecting us?" Victor asked. "But how? We didn't tell them we were coming. Er, did we?" He directed this last question to an equally confused-looking Victoria.

"I believe Mrs. Van Dort telephoned ahead," Emile replied, taking Victoria's wrap and Victor's coat and hanging them on the coat rack.

"You did? When?" Victor asked Victoria, perplexed. He thought for a moment. "But we don't have a telephone--" Emile cut Victor off with a haughty sniff.

"The elder Mrs. Van Dort, sir," he explained, sounding as though he would have liked nothing more than to replace "sir" with "moron." Ignoring the looks on Victor and Victoria's faces, he started across the entry. "If you'll follow me. Lord and Lady Everglot are waiting in the west drawing room."

"Your mother certainly works quickly, doesn't she?" Victoria said in a whisper as they followed Emile toward the drawing room.

"I know," Victor whispered back. "We only left there ten minutes ago." He took Victoria's hand and placed it in the crook of his arm as they walked. "And when did your parents get a telephone, anyway?"

"I haven't any idea...I wonder how much she told them?"

"Victoria, it's my mother we're talking about. She probably told them everything we told her, plus tomorrow's weather forecast."

"I can't decide whether to be annoyed or not. It's our news, and yet..."

"Yet?"

"I'll be terribly relieved if I don't have to tell my mother myself. I'd probably blush and stammer and not be able to get a word out."

"Now, now, no good taking my job away from me, Victoria. If you begin blushing and stammering, I won't seem...original anymore."

"Hmm...Have I told you lately how funny you are?"

"Do I detect a bit of sarcasm, my love?"

"Only a bit, darling."

"Ahem!" Emile cleared his throat obnoxiously, startling Victor and Victoria out of their whispered conversation. Victor looked up and saw that the butler was already standing at the closed door of the drawing room. The two of them had lagged behind considerably while they were talking, and they quickened their pace a bit to catch up to Emile.

"Do wait here, I'll announce you," Emile said. Victor felt Victoria's fingers dig into his arm. She was obviously getting quite annoyed.

"Announce us? You just said that they knew we were coming," Victoria said. Yes, she definitely was annoyed. Victor looked down at her to see that her eyelids were dropped almost all the way down, nearly turning her eyes to slits. That was always a definite tell as to when Victoria was irritated, Victor had learned. Over the three years that they'd been married, Victoria's patience with her family had waned so much that by now it was almost non-existent. Moreover, neither of them had quite forgiven Victoria's parents for what had become known as the "Barkis Incident." Still, Victor knew that it was usually better to just let Victoria deal with both Emile and her parents, considering how he always managed to louse things up grandly whenever he got within ten feet of the Everglots. They just put him on edge so badly...No matter how long he and Victoria were married, he'd probably never get used to them. So keeping to form, Victor kept quiet as he glanced nervously back and forth between Victoria and the butler.

Emile held his nose higher in the air than usual. "Protocol insists that I announce all visitors. Granted, it has been quite some time since you were in polite company--" Victor winced as Victoria squeezed his arm even more tightly--"but I trust you haven't forgotten the way that polite society operates," Emile finished with a sniff.

"No, I have not forgotten," Victoria replied, her tone icy. "Now if you will please show us in, Emile."

Had Victor been the butler, and had Victoria spoken that way to him, he would have jumped immediately to do whatever she said. One did not argue with Victoria when she used that tone. Luckily, she didn't use it very often, and she practically never used it toward Victor. Well, except for last Christmas, when Victor had insisted on cutting down a Christmas tree himself...that had been quite the episode. In any case, Emile obviously wasn't used to taking orders of any kind from Victoria. So he merely asked, in a voice dripping with phony politeness,

"Have you a calling card that I may present to Lord and Lady Everglot?"

Victor, quite put off his guard from this thinly veiled sparring contest, immediately put his hand to his waistcoat pocket. Of course there were no cards there. He was just about to mumble an apology--anything to put a stop to the icy glaring going on between Victoria and Emile--when Victoria cut him off.

"No, we do not have a card," she said quietly through clenched teeth. "They are my parents. I believe they know who we are."

Emile gave a very dainty shrug. "Of course...However, as of course you know, calling cards are accepted as the rule in polite company." As he said this last, Emile shot Victor a glance. Victor bristled just slightly. He didn't want to give the butler the satisfaction of allowing himself to be offended by that barb. Victor knew exactly what the Everglots thought of him and his family background--or lack thereof. It shouldn't matter. Victoria didn't care, and neither did he. Still, Victor felt he shouldn't have to hear about it every single time he set foot in his in-laws' house. He was distracted from thinking about it further when he realized that he couldn't feel his left hand anymore. Victoria had his arm in a death-grip, holding on hard enough for Victor to feel her fingernails digging into his arm right through his coat and shirt.

"Nevertheless, we do not have a card, we are expected guests, apparently, and I refuse to stand here and argue with you further," Victoria said, who had obviously had enough. "And I will thank you not to insult my husband, either."

Oh good, so it wasn't just him--Victoria had caught the butler's glance as well. Victor felt a bit better. Though he wished Victoria wouldn't upset herself. It really didn't seem worth it.

When Emile didn't respond, Victoria pressed her lips together and narrowed her eyes. "Are you going to see us into the drawing room, or will we have to go in ourselves unannounced?"

The butler seemed scandalized. He seemed to realize that Victoria really would just wrench the door open herself and enter the room, proper or not. Some tiny, slightly malicious part of Victor would actually have loved to see the looks on the Everglots' faces if Victoria barged into their drawing room unannounced, throwing order and propriety to the winds. Then again, the fallout that would occur afterward would probably be less entertaining.

Emile turned away from them and opened the door. Victor looked down at Victoria to see that she had a very self-satisfied smile on her face. If Victor didn't know her better, he might have called it a smirk. She'd won. Victoria loosened her grip on his arm, for which he was extremely grateful. Victor shook his head slightly. A quarrel among the nobility was weird. In the Van Dort family, people generally shouted and threw the occasional plate, and then it was forgotten. With Victoria's family, even when the argument was between a married daughter and a servant, things were always very restrained. It took a lot of practice to realize that a quarrel was happening at all.

"Are you all right?" Victor whispered out of the corner of his mouth as the two of them stood behind the butler.

"Of course, why shouldn't I be?" Victoria whispered back. Then she paused a moment before she said, "I was squeezing your arm again, wasn't I?"

"Yes...I could feel your fingernails."

"Through your coat? Victor, I'm sorry, I--"

"It doesn't matter," Victor interrupted quickly, knowing that he had very little time before they'd be announced to the Everglots. Still speaking in a whisper, he said, "Victoria, you shouldn't get so upset. Especially now, considering...you know." He made a vague gesture toward her stomach. "Remember what Mrs. Reed said. It's not good for you to be upset."

Victoria squeezed his arm again, this time affectionately. "Yes, I know. I'll try not to let them upset me." She sighed gently. "It's very difficult, though...you know that."

"I do...But I'm here with you."

"Yes, I--"

"Mr. and Mrs. Van Dort are here to see you, your lord- and ladyship," Emile announced into the drawing room. Victor and Victoria looked at one another and took a simultaneous deep breath. Hidden from their sight, they both heard Maudeline say,

"They're here? I was just forced to speak to the woman on the telephone. I shouldn't have to see her in person for at least six months."

"Your daughter and her husband, milady."

"Why didn't you say that, then? Bring them in."

Emile stood aside, and, after hesitating for just a moment, Victor and Victoria entered the drawing room.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Author's Note: This little scene with Emile is almost completely pointless, but I can't quite bring myself to get rid of it. I have a feeling it will come in handy later. Besides, Victoria and Emile just wouldn't stop--they seemed to really want to have this little argument. Perhaps I'll go back and edit later, since I really want to get into the scene with Maudeline and Finis. I think this scene will be useful as set-up--should I keep it or lose it? Although, that question might be easier to answer once I get "The Everglots: Part 2" finished. Please let me know what you think. As much as I like this scene, it's probably not necessary. Thanks.