Possible Trigger Warning for the first little bit of the story.
I felt pathetic to be perfectly honest. Only an hour ago we moved Sofia into her crib in her room, and here I was sitting on the floor beside the crib watching her sleep.
I watched her chest rise and fall slowly, listening to her breath leave her lips.
"Roza," Dimitri whispered with a laugh from the doorway. I looked at him with a meek smile and then looked back at Sofia. I could hear Dimitri walk into the room and he crouched down behind me, resting his hands on my shoulders.
"She's going to be fine," he whispered in my ear. I took a slow breath and let my eyes wander to her face.
"I promise, she'll be okay. We're just down the hall," Dimitri said pressing a kiss to my head. I looked up at him and nodded, getting up from the ground and leaned over the edge of the crib, kissing Sofia's downy head and rubbed the bottom of her foot with my thumb.
I followed Dimitri out of the nursery and into the living room, curling up on Dimitri once he sat on the couch. Dimitri lifted his hand and slipped his fingers into my hair, rubbing the strands between his fingers. I laid there and let the feeling wrap around me, letting the feeling of security wrap around me.
I was finally ready to talk about it.
After about a half hour I got up and poured myself and Dimitri a drink from the bar in the kitchen and bought it back to the couch. I handed one to Dimitri and sat down on the end of the couch, tucking my legs up and sat sideways to look at him.
"Remember last month when I met Adrian and I got upset?"
Dimitri looked at me out of the corner of his eye before nodding, turning on the couch to look at me. I knew that he was waiting for this conversation to happen.
"When I said he was in the hallway, I mean he was in the hallway when he was dragging me into his room. Adrian asked if I was okay, he wanted to call me a cab and he convinced him that I was fine."
Dimitri's jaw ticked as his teeth ground together. "Adrian knew something was wrong with you and didn't do anything?"
"From what I remember Dimitri, the guy made a convincing argument. Don't forget, he did get expelled for beating the shit out of him," I said, taking a drink of my whiskey. "That's not the worst thing."
"Oh?" Dimitri asked.
"I'm starting to remember more of it."
Dimitri closed his eyes and lifted his glass to his lips, taking a long drink before setting it back down and moved closer to me on the couch, slipping his hand into mine.
"I don't remember all of it, but I remember bits and pieces, what his room looked like, the panic that I felt, what his breath smelled like. When he…" I explained, trailing off with a shaky breath. Dimitri looked like he was in pain as he listened to me, rubbing his hand over the back of my knuckles. I took another deep breath before speaking.
"I remember when he tossed me into the hallway when he was done with me too. He didn't even give me back my clothes, everything was gone. It's like he kept them as a souvenir," I breathed out, choking on my words. Dimitri lifted me from my spot on the couch and into his lap, wrapping his arm around me tightly as I let the pain of facing reality out.
"Oh, my baby," Dimitri whispered into my hair, the pain so clear in his voice. I pressed my face into the crook of his neck, wrapping my arms around his waist.
"You kept this to yourself for so long, Roza. Why didn't you say something sooner?" Dimitri asked his hand tight in my hair.
"I didn't know how," I mumbled, "Any time I thought about it I wanted to puke."
Dimitri didn't say much after that, just held me tightly like he was the glue to hold the broken pieces of me together. Maybe he was. I turned my face and pressed my ear against his chest, listening to the sound of his heart beat steadily in his chest.
It felt a little freeing to admit my trauma out loud to someone. I never thought about talking to someone about it. Before I couldn't remember much, but now that I remember almost everything, I felt a little better about speaking it out loud.
"Thank you for listening," I said, more thankful than I could put into words.
Dimitri pulled back enough that I could look at him. He cupped my cheeks and stroked the tears away from my cheeks.
"Thank you for telling me," he said softly, "Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me."
I gave him a small sad smile and pressed my lips to his. Dimitri rested his forehead against mine and continued to stroke my cheek. I nodded and let out a slow shaky breath. Dimitri kept me tight to him for a while, giving me the comfort I wanted without being asked.
"The only thing I don't remember is his name and what he looked like, and a part of me is glad I don't remember what he looked like. That way his face can't haunt my dreams too."
I could hear Dimitri grind his teeth and he squeezed me tighter, kissing my head again.
"You won't need to worry about him every, I promise," Dimitri said into my hair, rubbing his hand over my spine. I relaxed a bit more into his arms and pressed my face into his neck.
"You can't promise that," I said quietly.
"I can do my best Roza."
DPOV
My eyes snapped open, and it took me a moment to figure out what woke me and where I was. I blinked and pushed myself up on the couch, realizing that I had fallen asleep. I took a moment to listen for Sofia when there was a heavy knock on the door.
Ah. That's what it was.
I got up and rubbed my face before opening the door, raising my brows to find Adrian on the other side of the door.
"Adrian? What time is it?" I asked through a yawn.
"Late? Early? I don't know. But I didn't know who else to talk to," Adrian said stuffing his hands into his pockets. I stepped aside and allowed him in, closing the door.
"Rose and Sofia are asleep," I said in warning. Adrian nodded his head and sighed heavily, running his hand through his hair roughly. He was distressed clearly. I walked into the kitchen and opened a few cupboards in the bar, pulling out a bottle of whiskey and two glasses before returning to the living room and poured us each a drink.
Adrian thanked me quietly and took his glass, finishing it in one mouthful before gesturing for me to pour another glass.
"He's dead."
"Who's dead?"
"Nathan. He's dead. He had an aneurysm burst," Adrian said gruffly, tapping his thumb against the glass. I frowned and sat forward. Nathan wasn't a fantastic uncle, but he was still my uncle.
"I'm so sorry," I said.
Adrian shook his head and leaned back on the couch. "That's not the worst of it."
"Oh?" I asked as I spilled.
Adrian gave a dry chuckle. "Yeah. Mom decided that in the same breath of telling me that Nathan is dead, that he isn't my dad. Can you imagine that?! Being told 'I'm sorry your dad is dead, but he's not actually your dad'? Like what the fuck was that? Did she really think that was the time to tell me? Or to tell me who my biological dad actually is?"
I grimaced and threw back the last of my glass and then filled mine and Adrian's again.
"Wow. That's a lot. I'm sorry."
Adrian shook his head and took a drink. "Not as sorry as I am," he said turning to look at me. "Seems like my mom wasn't the only adulterer in the family."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that we are not cousins," he said bluntly, looking me dead in the eyes. I stared at him as my tongue felt like it had turned into lead.
"What?"
"Apparently, Nathan was sterile. Which is why I am an only child. I guess Randall and my mom were-"
"I don't think I want to hear this," I cut Adrian off, grimacing and pouring another drink. Apparently, we'd be drinking the whole bottle.
"Do you think he knew?"
"Who?"
"Randall. Do you think he knew that he was the one?"
"No clue. Wouldn't be surprised if he didn't. Not that I really would say it is an upgrade. At least Nathan didn't knock Mom around. He was just a narcissistic, condescending asshole," Adrian grumbled. I nodded but to be honest, the truth wasn't all that surprising. Adrian was so similar to Randall in his vices; the drinking, the smoking, the gambling. But at the same time, the kindness, compassion, and wit of his mother made the bad seem tolerable. But knowing what I knew now, it made so much more sense. It made sense why people constantly were confusing us as brothers often in our childhood.
"I'm actually shocked nobody figured it out."
I canted my head and set my glass down on the coffee table with a sigh. "I'm sure someone figured it out at some point."
"Why didn't we figure it out earlier?"
"Probably because we lived on different continents after age twelve."
Adrian snorted a laugh and tapped his knee in agitation. I could sympathize with that. I was agitated and shocked, but I felt for Adrian. He felt betrayed and didn't want to say it out loud. A squawk of tears broke the tense bubble we were in and I hopped up from the couch to get to Sofia before Rose did, hoping that she'd sleep a bit longer. Sofia was not a sound sleeper the last few days. I slipped into the nursery and picked her up, kissing the crocodile tears on her cheek. I changed Sofia's diaper before going back into the living room, well aware that it would take a bit before Sofia went back down.
Coming out of Sofia's room I found a bleary-eyed Rose in the hallway. She barely had her eyes open when she came to a stop.
"I'll be up for a bit, go back to sleep," I whispered, kissing her nose. Rose mumbled something that I couldn't understand and rested her head against my chest for a moment before turning around and heading back into our room. I waited until Rose got into our bedroom before going into the living room.
Adrian looked up from his phone as I came out and a small smile crossed his lips. It seemed like Sofia made the worst situations more manageable. I sat down next to him and looked down at my brown-eyed girl before resting her against my shoulder.
"She's so big already," Adrian said quietly, shifting his position on the couch to look at Sofia a little better. I smirked and kissed her head.
"Yeah. Five months now. Rose's anxiety is just coming down," I said softly, not wanting to startle Sofia. Adrian furrowed his brows and shook his head in slight confusion.
"Rose had a baby before. She was pregnant after the party you met her at. Jenny died in her sleep at four months. Sudden Infant Death Syndrome," I explained slowly, holding Sofia a little tighter. Adrian let out a deep sigh and shook his head, lips pursed tight.
"Damn. I'm so sorry, that must have been horrible."
"It was. That's why Sofia slept in our room until last week. Rose was terrified to let Sofia sleep too far away. The slightest noise and she would wake up. It's like Rose can't sleep out of fear of something happening."
"Yes, but you couldn't let her sleep in your room forever," Adrian said and I nodded in agreeance. It was convenient for Sofia to sleep in our room for night feeds and diaper changes. It put both of us at ease; me because this was all new to me, and well, we all know why it put Rose at ease. But I also loved the idea of Sofia sleeping in the nursery we put together. It was the right time.
"I think now that she is five months it helps Rose relax a bit. I mean we both still wake up in the night and check on her, but it seems to be getting easier," I said, "We even bought one of those video monitors so that we can see her."
Adrian nodded and rubbed his hand over his face before tilting his head to the side to look at Sofia.
"Can I hold her?"
I nodded and slowly pulled Sofia off my shoulder, taking a quick peek to find her nodding off. I gently handed her over and helped him situate her against his chest, showing him where to support her body. Adrian had a ghost of a smile on his face as he cupped her back and bottom.
"Even though she's getting big, she still seems so small."
I smirked and nodded my head. I understood that too. She was still so small in my hands. A part of me wanted her to stay that small forever.
Adrian was quiet for a few moments, just rubbing his hand slowly over Sofia's back, lifting his head back when she moved hers so she faced me.
"Did you do what you said you were going to?"
I looked up at Adrian and pursed my lips before giving a firm nod. "Thank you for telling me who it was."
Adrian scoffed. "Hey, if I could get away from thumping the shit out of him again, I would have done it myself. Ralf shouldn't have gotten away with it in the first place."
I chuckled dryly and took Sofia back from him, kissing her forehead. It felt wrong talking about something so horrible while holding something so pure, but it had to be done.
"Who did you get to do it?"
"I don't know who exactly. Rose's father found someone to take care of it," I said shortly. I knew that Abe would know what to do, and he did. Adrian nodded in understanding and looked at the time on the wall before standing.
"I should probably get going, it's pretty late," Adrian mumbled through a yawn, stretching his hands over his head. I stood up and shifted Sofia in my arms, holding her to the side of my chest. I followed Adrian to the door and watched him stand there for a moment.
"I'm sorry to drop all of this on you," Adrian said solemnly.
I shook my head and clapped his shoulder. "Don't worry about it. We both deserved to know the truth."
"Maybe when we aren't both intoxicated we can sit down and have a better conversation about that?"
I nodded and leaned against the table by the door and gave Adrian a flat smile. It was something we needed to talk about when we both were ready. Adrian gave a wave and opened the door and closed it gently behind him.
I looked down at Sofia and found her eyes drooping shut, her little fist under her chin. I sighed and headed towards the nursery. I kissed Sofia's cheek and gently set her down in her crib.
"I love you," I whispered, brushing her hair back. It wasn't enough to wake her, but she shifted slightly, turning her head towards my hand. I stood over her crib for a few moments before I got changed for bed. I brushed my teeth and then climbed into bed beside Rose, wrapping my arm around her waist and kissing her shoulder.
"Who was here?"
I stilled for a second as Rose shifted under my arm and turned her head towards me. Eyes still closed and just on the cusp of sleep again.
"Adrian."
Rose scrunched up her face. "It's three in the morning. What couldn't wait until morning?"
I sighed and rubbed my hand up her back, coming into her hair and rubbing the base of my head with my fingertips. "I don't even know where to begin."
Rose hummed and sighed in content, a small crossing her lips as I moved my hand further up her head, massaging her scalp gently.
"My uncle passed."
Rose's eyes opened and met my gaze, pushing herself up on her elbow. "Shit. I'm sorry. How did Adrian take it?!" Rose exclaimed in a hushed voice, brows pinched together.
"I don't know. I think he was having a harder time finding out that Nathan wasn't his biological father."
Rose's eyes widened to the size of saucers. "What?! But you two look so alike!"
"That's because we are still related."
Rose furrowed her brow before it dawned on her. She pushed herself up completely and sat on her knees.
"NO!" Rose exclaimed in surprise, wincing when she realized how loudly she spoke. We both waited for a moment before she spoke again. "You're joking!"
I shook my head and rested my head on the pillow. "I wish I was."
Rose shook her head and ran a hand through her hair. "Wow. I, I don't even know what to say. Are you okay? Is Adrian okay?"
I raised my brow at her. "Well. Adrian and I drank the entire bottle of Redbreast your father bought me when Sofia was born."
Rose shook her head and laid back down, snuggling close to me and rested her hand on my chest, rubbing her fingers over my shirt. "Wow. I can't believe it. Adrian is your brother?"
"According to Adrian's mother."
Rose rested her hand over my stomach, and I placed mine over hers, patting it.
"Let's just go to sleep, Roza. I don't want to think about this anymore tonight," I said, tilting my head down and kissing her head. She nodded and snuggled closer to me, kissing my chest. I was almost asleep when my phone buzzed on the nightstand. I slowly stretched my arm out and picked it up, squinting at the screen due to the bright light.
It's done. We also have enough dirt on him to put him away for a while.
I sighed and set my phone back down before wrapping my arm back around Rose, tilting my head down and kissing the top of Rose's head.
RPOV
I scrubbed the soap out of my hair, shaking some of the wet hair out of my face. It was a glorious day because I didn't need to work, so I could just relax around the house for the morning, and then meet my dad for lunch. Dad had practically begged to have Sofia stay the night with him. After talking with Dimitri, we both decided that there was no harm or concern with letting Dad take Sofia for the night.
I jumped when the shower door opened and Dimitri slipped in, smirking at me as he did. I smiled at him and turned back to the spray, washing the suds off my face when his hands slipped around my waist, drawing me back to him. I wiped my hand over my face when I felt his lips press to the juncture of my neck and I sighed. I turned towards him and grabbed onto his waist as his hands cupped my neck, drawing me in for a heavy kiss. I leaned into his body and stretched up on my toes carefully, clutching at his back as my lips moved with his.
The feeling of his hard muscles against my skin was comforting and I squeaked when he changed our positions and pressed me against the wall, gripping the back of my thighs and holding me up with his hips.
"Good morning," I mumbled when I pulled back to breathe, grinning up at him with half-closed eyes. Dimitri pecked my lips again before moving to my jaw.
"Good morning it is," he said huskily, nipping at my ear. I squirmed and rubbed against him, my fingers sliding over the wet skin of his back. I wiggled out of his embrace and pulled him under the spray of the hot water, smiling at him with a small laugh as I put conditioner in my hair, watching the muscles of his chest move as he washed his hair, licking my lips as the suds dripped down his neck and shoulders.
Dimitri chuckled and I realized that I had been starring at him, laughing too and poked his stomach with my fingers. Dimitri caught my wrist and pulled me closer to him, running his fingers over my waist. I looked up at him from under my lashes and bit my lip, pulling his mouth down to me.
There was an urgency that started to build in me and I think he felt it too as his hands became tighter on my waist before slipping down to my hips, squeezing and kneading the skin. I pulled back and tipped my head back to quickly rise the conditioner from my hair and saw the thick haze of lust present in his eyes. I was sure mine showed the same. Once I had rinsed my hair I turned the shower off and stepped out, holding his gaze as he followed me out. We barely dried ourselves off before we were back in each other's embrace like magnets, lips moulded together so hard it could bruise.
We didn't make it very far. We only managed to make it to the counter before Dimitri turned me around, pushing me up against the cold marble. I wiggled my ass against him and squealed when he grabbed my cheeks firmly in his hands. I bent over when his hand gently pushed on my shoulder and I braced myself against the mirror with one hand, the other against the sink.
I knew that we would need to be quick, but honestly, I could go for quick and dirty right now. It had been longer than either of us would have liked. I bit my lip in excitement as I felt his cock tease my entrance and let a quiet moan slip through my lips when he finally pushed into me.
It was exactly that. Quick and dirty. Our pace was brutal, and I knew that I was going to have bruises between his grip on my hips and the pressure from the counter. I looked up into the mirror and just about came apart at the sight I was met with.
My face was flushed, and my lips were parted slightly. My chest was flushed too. Seeing Dimitri made my insides turn to goo and I clenched around him. The wanton look on his face was hot and watching him move while watching myself at the same time was almost too much.
I clenched around him again and let out a scream of pleasure, my toes curling slightly as I tried to keep myself upright.
"Fuck Roza," Dimitri moaned, reaching out and laid his hand over mine that was braced against the mirror, pressing his fingers between mine. I felt like I was going to implode my orgasm was so close. I pushed my hips back to his and felt the band of tension snap inside me.
With a scream of his name, I came apart beneath him, my eyes rolling back into my head when it all became too much. Over the rushing sound of my blood in my ears, I heard him moan and the flush of his release inside me.
I shuddered and panted quietly, tipping my head down when Dimitri buried his face in my neck, panting too. I licked my lips and lifted my head up, rolling my shoulders a bit when they tensed up from our position. Dimitri pressed an open-mouthed kiss to my shoulder before standing up straight, slipping out of me. A small whimper slipped through my lips, and I turned around, slipping my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his again.
"That was quite the morning workout," I mumbled against his lips, giggling when he nipped my bottom lip.
"I thought so too. Figured it would put both of us in a good mood for the day," Dimitri said, squeezing my waist gently. I hummed in response and stretched up on my toes to kiss him again. Despite being out of breath I didn't want to pull my lips from his. The taste of his lips would make me high if they were a drug. Even now, I'm addicted to the taste. I pressed my tongue against the seam of his lips and his tongue met mine, rubbing against it as my fingers twisted into the ends of his hair. Dimitri pulled back and let his forehead rest against mine as he caught his breath, warmth fluttering over my face. I tilted my head and kissed his cheek and let my lips press soft kisses over his cheek to his ear.
I let my lips linger by his ear for a moment before I sucked on the skin below it, moaning at the groan that slipped from his lips, his hands gripping my hips tightly.
"If you keep doing that, I'm not going to make it to work on time," Dimitri groaned, making me smirk. I sighed dramatically and pulled back from my torture to his neck.
"Fine, go," I said dramatically, leaning back against the counter on my elbows, demurely crossing my legs while smiling at him. I watched his eyes follow me like a hawk and I smirked. I pushed myself off the counter and brushed against him as I walked into the bedroom, a little more sway in my hips than necessary.
I heard Dimitri curse under his breath in Russian before he followed me into the bedroom, catching my hand and pulled me to him.
"My meeting isn't until eleven; I'll go in late," Dimitri said thickly as he picked me up, bringing me to bed.
I sighed and tucked my hands under my head and let my eyes close, a small smile on my face. My whole body felt like it was made out of putty. I was practically purring as Dimitri rubbed his fingers over my scalp.
"I don't think I can move," I mumbled.
Dimitri chuckled and leaned over to press his lips to the back of my shoulder. "I feel the same," he laughed and kissed my should again. A man-eating smile crossed my lips and I opened my eyes, meeting his. Dimitri had a grin on his lips and twirled my hair around his fingers.
"You have to go soon," I mumbled, adjusting my head on my folded arms.
"I know," Dimitri said quietly, trailing his fingers down my spine. I trembled a little and smiled into my arms. Dimitri's hand drifted further down my spine and let his fingers dance over the dip in my back before letting them rest on my ass, giving it a firm squeeze. Dimitri leaned over me again and kissed my shoulder, moving over to press a kiss to the spot between my shoulders, and then hovered over me as he pressed a kiss further down my spine.
"You're really going to be late," I giggled, squirming slightly at the ticklish feeling his lips left in their wake. Dimitri made a hum of agreeance and skimmed his nose over my back.
"You smell good," he said thickly, laying back down beside me. I snorted a laugh and pushed myself up on my forearms.
"I smell like sweat and you."
"Exactly," Dimitri chuckled and stroked the back of his fingers against my cheek. "You know, we met just a little over a year ago," Dimitri said softly, an even softer smile forming on his lips. I smiled and nodded my head.
"Yeah. Just after my birthday. I spent almost a month thinking about donating my eggs and then all the tests. It's hard to think it's been a year," I said leaning towards him and kiss his cheek. What a year it had been. I wonder what I year could have had if I never matched his profile.
"Ivan told me once that he helped you pick me," I said with a smirk. Dimitri raised a brow at me.
"Did he now?"
"Mmmhmm."
"Well, that's partly true. I had already picked your file before Ivan decided to snoop through confidential information," Dimitri laughed as he pulled himself from bed. I sighed and watched Dimitri's backside as he walked towards our closet.
"What made you pick me?" I called out. Dimitri moved around through the closet for a few moments. I waited with a grin on my face as I waited for Dimitri to come back out. He came out holding a suit and a dress shirt, winking at me as he walked into the bathroom.
"Hello!?"
"It wasn't anything in particular, Roza. Gut feeling really. There was just something about your profile that called to me. I didn't even look at your photo until after I read your profile," Dimitri said, leaning around the edge of the door frame, steam rising behind him from the shower.
"So it was my doe eyes and wild curls?"
Dimitri laughed deeply and rolled his eyes playfully. "No, but it definitely was a bonus. Actually, after I met you and we started the process, I remember vividly hoping that our child had your hair," Dimitri said before disappearing back into the bathroom.
"I hope all our kids do!" Dimitri called out from the shower. I felt my cheeks heat up and a shit eating smile crossed my lips, sinking back down into the bed. Those few words made my chest swell up. The thought had crossed my mind that maybe we'd have more, but I never heard him mention it.
Let me know what you think!:)
