As I stood in the empty room that was filled with glorious midmorning light, I envisioned it as our living room. The large windows brought in so much light that having electrical lights on would be pointless. I loved the large yard and the bare magnolia trees that stood there. I liked how high the ceilings were and the flagstone fireplace. It was a breathtaking view and the snow sticking to the trees added to it.
I toyed with my necklace as I turned in a slow circle to take in more of the room. I could really see this as our home. I smiled to myself as hands caressed my waist and then cupped my expanding stomach, a chin tucking onto my shoulder and kiss on my ear.
"What do you think?"
"I think that I've only seen the kitchen, backyard and living room and that I love what I see," I said happily, resting my hands on his.
"You like what you see so far?" another voice called out. I turned and nodded at our agent, Clive as he walked towards us.
"I love what I see so far. Show us the rest?" I said as I laced my hand with Dimitri's. Clive was more than happy as he lead us through the rest of the house. The colours were all white and cream with cherry wood floors. Clive showed us the master bedroom first and my mouth just about dropped to the floor. It was massive, and the walk-in closet and bathroom were stunning.
"Can I live in that bathtub?" I asked dumbly pointing at the deep tub, already envisioning how nice it would be. Dimitri chuckled and kissed my head before directing me to the other rooms, where we discussed which room would be for who and how we would decorate.
"Are you thinking of having more?" Clive asked kindly as I looked at how many rooms were on the upper floor. I smile and looked up at Dimitri. We hadn't really discussed more, but I had a feeling there would be at least another.
"We'll see what happens," Dimitri said tenderly, stroking my hand before kissing the back of it. Clive nodded and showed us more, and the more we saw, the more I didn't want to leave. The colour scheme of the whole house was neutral so it was perfect for us if we wanted to change anything.
We came to a stop back in the living room and I let out a sigh of content. I could really see this as ours.
"So?" Dimitri asked as he brushed his thumb against my cheek.
"I love it," I said quietly, "You?"
"I love it too," he agreed as he pulled me close. I smiled and looked around the room again, gazing at the fireplace in awe before looking back at him.
"I think we should put in an offer," I said with a smile. Dimitri kissed my cheek before frowning, rubbing the pad of his thumb where his lips had been.
"You look so tired, you're not sleeping?"
I shrugged and rubbed my face. I wasn't sleeping well. Between the recurring dreams and Sofia's teething, I didn't sleep a lot.
"I'm fine."
Dimitri groaned quietly in the back of his throat as he rubbed his hands over my lower back. "Roza, you can't lie about this anymore. Do you think I don't hear you crying in your sleep? Or in the bathroom in the middle of the night. Talk to me," he implored, his eyes boring into mine so intently that I felt like I was being compelled.
"We probably shouldn't talk about it here. When we get home, okay?"
Dimitri nodded and smiled at Clive as he came back into the living room holding the necessary documents.
"I spoke to the sellers' realtor, and they're going to accept your offer. We can get started on the agreement," Clive explained.
I looked at Dimitri with a smirk. "What's a timeline that they're looking at?"
Clive flipped through the agreement and his notes. "Earliest they can do is two weeks. Does that work for you?"
Dimitri and I looked at each other before Dimitri reached for a pen. "That's perfect. We can have the house the day after we get married."
I could practically hear the questions bouncing around in Dimitri's mind as we drove. His one hand on the wheel, the other on my knee, stroking it gently with a squeeze every few moments. I couldn't handle the silence.
"I've been having nightmares," I lead with while resting my hand on his. Dimitri hummed in response, taking his eyes off the road to look at me before looking back.
"About the night Jenny died."
Dimitri's hand flipped up from resting on my knee to hold my hand as he pulled onto a side street and put the hazard lights on. Once he did that, he turned his body to look at me. I took a second to think, mostly because talking about that night always made my heart feel like it was in my throat.
"I keep having the same dream over and over. It went away a few years ago, but they just started again. I called Dr. Miles about it. He thinks it's a form of PTSD."
"What could have caused it?"
"Honestly. Feeling secure. I was in a bad place during my pregnancy with Jenny and then I felt okay. I mean, I was head over heels in love with my daughter and then she was gone. And then I kept having nightmares about that night. I guess I just got to a point to where I blocked it out. And then we started building our life together and I started to feel safe and comfortable, and I am in love with you and our daughter, and Olive, and I," I explained but the words started to tumble out of my mouth so fast that I was starting to breathe heavily.
Dimitri shifted forward in his seat and cupped my cheeks, shushing me in a soothing tone to try to calm me. I leaned into one of his hands and placed my hands over his and took a few deep breaths.
"Why didn't you feel like you could tell me this?" Dimitri asked when my breathing had finally gotten back to normal.
"I didn't want to burden you with this too."
"Burden me with this too? What does that mean Roza? You haven't burdened me with anything."
"I mean with my past baggage," I said with a sigh, but Dimitri shook his head.
"Rose. I think if anyone in this car has inflicted their past baggage on someone, it's been me. I mean, Tasha, the time where we thought Vinnie was my son. Roza, please don't think that you're burdening me by telling me things. I'm always going to be an ear for you," Dimitri implored, rubbing his thumbs over my cheeks.
"I'm sorry," I said weakly.
Dimitri shook his head and pulled my head to rest on his shoulder. "Don't apologize. There's nothing to be sorry for. I promise, nothing to be sorry for," he said with a kiss to my hair.
I sighed and rubbed my cheek on his shirt. I felt better now that I told him, but I still felt heavy. Not exactly heavy because I was pregnant but heavy in my heart. I hated reliving that pain over and over again.
"It'll get better, Roza. I promise it'll get better."
The snow was lulling me into a perfect feeling. I was curled up with Dimitri, limbs splayed across him with my head nestled in his shoulder. Sofia was sleeping in her crib, Dimitri was watching The Harder They Fall, which seemed to be one of the few westerns I could get through lately. Every other one put me to sleep.
I was comfy and cozy in my little bubble when there was a knock on the door. I groaned but knew I would have to get up because I had Dimitri practically pinned to the couch. I grumbled about someone busting our bubble and caught Dimitri's smirk as I went to the door.
I opened the door and raised my brows. "Um. Hello?"
Lissa smiled at me as she glided through the door, walking down the hall. I frowned and closed the door before following her. I looked at Dimitri as he sat on the couch, a smirk on his face.
"What?"
Dimitri just shook his head and pointed towards our bedroom. I huffed and followed Lissa's trail, finding her packing a bag.
"What are you doing?"
"Getting you ready for your bachelorette party," Lissa replied primly with a sweet smile.
"I'm getting married in the morning."
"Exactly. We are stealing you away for the night and you will see Dimitri at the altar in the morning," Lissa quipped as she zipped my bag shut. I shook my head and walked out to find Dimitri sitting on the couch with a shit eating grin on his face.
"Did you know I was being kidnapped?"
Dimitri tipped his head back and laughed. "Roza, you knew this too."
"Pardon me?"
"Lissa and Mia told you this last week," Dimitri said with a smirk as he rests his arms behind his head and crossed his ankles. "Baby brain?"
I threw the pillow at the end of the coach at him with a slight glare. "Don't say that! If you say I have it, it'll come out in full force! I will start calling eggs 'chickens' again!"
Dimitri laughed and caught the pillow, tossing to back to the end of the couch and gestured for me to come closer. I kept my glare on him as I made way to him, but it eased up when he sat up and rested his hands on my hips, pulling me to stand between his legs.
I was fighting my smile as he smiled up at me and kissed my stomach. "It's okay. I'll know what you're talking about."
I rolled my eyes and set my hands on his shoulders. "Thanks," I replied dryly.
Dimitri smirked again and stood up, letting his hands skim up my body before they cupped my neck. I had felt like my anxiety and stress had been rising all week as we got closer to the wedding. I knew Dimitri was an excited nervous, but I was a hot mess. I was nervous about things going wrong with the wedding, had a mini meltdown when I tried on my wedding dress and it was too tight around my waist, my dad and Janine both got the flu this week.
Actually, hot mess was a massive understatement.
"I want you to do something for me tonight?" Dimitri whispered kissing my cheek.
"Hmm?"
"I want you to not think about the wedding tonight," Dimitri started but the look on my face made him laugh. "I just mean, I want you to think about our marriage instead. Think about what happens next. Think about me being your husband, and how we are joining our families, and how nice our honeymoon will be when we get to it."
I nodded my head and took a breath, trying to relax a bit more.
"You want to know what's keeping me calm?"
"What?"
"I keep thinking about the first time I get to kiss you as my wife, and getting to see you in your wedding dress, and getting to spend the rest of my life with you."
My lip quivered slightly and I burrowed my face into his chest, wrapping my arms tightly around his neck. It did help to hear that and it made me excited.
"I'm excited to kiss you too," I said which made the both of us chuckle and I pulled away from me, stretching up on my toes to kiss him. I cut off his chuckle and I toyed with the ends of his hair as I pulled myself closer to him.
Lissa cleared her throat from behind us and I turned to find her standing with Sofia in her arms, kissing her cheek.
"She was standing in her crib when I came out of your room. She was wide away," Lissa said as she rocked from side to side with Sofia. I shook my head and kissed Dimitri again before walking towards my jailer. A jailer who had teamed up with Mia and I had absolutely no idea of what was in store for me.
I took my daughter out of Lissa's arms and snuggled her before handing her over to Dimitri.
"Remember. Relax, enjoy yourself. I'll see you tomorrow," Dimitri said, emphasizing on relax and gave me one more kiss.
"Yeah, yeah, have fun with this one. She better not come to the wedding tomorrow speaking like a cowboy," I joked before facing Lissa.
"Alright. Take me away, Warden."
I was surprised. I was expecting a club or strippers. I was not expecting an all-inclusive package at a spa.
"You're serious?"
Mia and Lissa looked at each other. "Um. Yeah? What better way to spend the night than getting pampered for your wedding and making sure you get a good sleep?" Mia asked in a tone that insinuated that I was being an idiot for questioning it.
"Oh thank God," I sighed as I sank down into one of the plushy seats. Lissa and Mia both laughed as an attendant came in with a tray of drinks. I eyeballed the champagne glass as she set them down in front of us.
"Orange juice and sparkling juice. No alcohol," the attendant said when she noticed my gaze. I nodded and picked up the glass, taking a small sip. It tasted the exact same.
"So you two think I need to relax?" I joked.
Lissa shrugged while Mia looked a little sad. "You are exhausted. Don't get me wrong, I know that you aren't doing this alone. But you're pregnant, working, you just took your exams, and you're raising Sofia. We would be surprised if you didn't need to relax."
I nodded and snuggled back into my seat. "You're right. Olive is taking a lot out of me."
Lissa smirked and got up, bringing me a fluffy robe. "You should get changed into this. We have massages, facials, nails, salt cave therapy. We even got someone who will do a treatment for your hair so that it is perfect for tomorrow," Lissa said excitedly, her excitement clear on her face.
I nodded and took it from her and headed into the powder room off to the side and got changed. I took a moment to study myself in the mirror. I was fortunate that my stretch marks weren't ridiculous, but they were there. I had a love-hate relationship with them. I hated that they were there, but they signified the life inside me was growing. I had that glow that I enjoyed with my pregnancy with Sofia, and I looked healthy.
It made me happy to feel happy about being in my own skin.
I came back out and found that the room had been set up for one of our treatments now.
I felt like I floating on a cloud by the time I got through my massage, and then when I got my nails done I was practically asleep. Actually, for a few minutes, I did fall asleep during my pedicure. I jolted awake and found the esthetician smiling at me.
"I promise, you are not the first Momma to fall asleep during a pedicure," he said patting my foot before applying another coat of polish. I blinked and looked over at Mia and Lissa and smiled at them.
"Are you two having as much fun as I am?"
Both of them chuckled at me. "Yes, we are having fun. While you were napping, Lissa and I were discussing whether or not you might want a baby shower."
I looked at Mia, stunned. I had never had a baby shower. I never had one with Jenny, and I didn't have one with Sofia either. It felt weird, but I also knew that it wasn't something that families did in Russia.
"Don't you usually only have one for the first baby?"
"Yes, but you've never had one. Plus, it could be fun, right?"
I shrugged. "I don't know, let me think about it, okay?" I said. Mia nodded in understanding, but I could already see the glint in Lissa's eyes.
"Are you excited about what's happening tomorrow?"
I smirked and a laugh slipped out. "Of course, I am. I'm getting married," I said with an eye roll. Lissa grinned.
"That's the response I was looking for."
I shook my head and let it rest against the pillow behind my head. "We get to find out what we're having on Monday," I said with a smile, closing my eyes. The sound of excited squeals makes my smile grow as I reached down and rubbed my belly. Olive was started to move around a lot more these days, but with how big they were compared to the size of my stomach, Olive was bigger than usual.
Not that I was surprised. Sofia was bigger than Jenny, I would be surprised if this baby wasn't big too.
"Is it wrong that I'm more excited to see that bump in your wedding dress than I am about seeing the venue itself?" Mia asked as she leaned over in her chair and rested her hand on my belly too, rubbing her fingers over the plush robe.
"I think a lot of people feel that way. Plus, my bump looks fantastic in my wedding dress," I quipped.
Lissa smiled and let her head flop against her pillow as she looked at me.
"What?"
"I'm just happy you're getting your happy ending, that's all."
I smiled back at her. "Thank you," I said softly.
I had just managed to settle my stomach when there was a knock on the door. Nothing worse than kneeling over the toilet for a half-hour on your wedding day. The room we were using as a bridal suite at The Rainbow Room was cozy and nice.
"Yeah?"
Adrian poked his head in and gave me a soft smile. "Dimitri told me to bring you these. It got back to him that you were feeling sick," he said as he walked into the room, setting the package of ginger tablets on the table.
"Thanks, I appreciate that," I said but raised my brows at his weird expression, "What is it?"
"There's someone who wants to talk to you, but I wasn't sure about letting them in."
I furrowed my brows at him as he walked to the door, poking his head into the hall and spoke quietly to someone. He looked back at me and moved back enough for someone else to come in. Except, I never expected who was there to be there.
"Tasha? What are you doing here?"
She looked at Adrian hesitantly before looking back at me. "I wanted to speak to you for a moment. If that's alright?"
I looked at Adrian as he stood idly at the door. I gave him a slight shrug and he nodded, stepping outside but left the door open a crack.
I shift uncomfortably in my seat, angling my body towards her so she knew she could start. I tucked my robe around me tighter and I watched her eyes follow the motion, glancing at my stomach.
"I know that we did not meet on the best of terms, and I know that I hurt Dimitri and that you probably don't like me. But I wanted to say that I wish you and Dimitri the best on your marriage," Tasha explained, shifting awkwardly on her feet.
"Thank you," I said robotically.
"And um, congratulations on your second baby," she said with a short laugh, pointing at my stomach. My lips quirked up and I let a slight smile cross my lips.
"Thank you, again."
Tasha still shifted awkwardly on her feet before she pulled a chair out from the other table and sat down across from me, giving her head a quick shake with a sigh.
"Okay. I know this is weird, but I'm going to say it. I was a terrible wife, I know that. But I've seen you with him, and I see how much you love him, and how much he loves you. I know that he did love me once upon a time, but he never looked at me like he looks at you. I hurt him, but I'm really, really happy that he has you. I know that I really have no place to say any of this, but I did love him once. And I hope that you two will last. Because two people who make each other that happy should last," she said, almost rushed as if she was going to lose her nerve to say it.
I sat there slightly stunned, mouth gaping a little bit as I processed what she said. I never once expected to have a conversation like this with my soon-to-be husband's ex-wife.
"And I also wanted to thank you again for staying with Vinnie."
I nodded. "I would hope someone would do that for me one day."
Tasha nodded and we both sat awkwardly looking at each other for a moment before she got up. "So. Uh, congratulations, I assume I will see pictures in a newspaper or magazine or something," she said while clearing her throat, looking over to the side.
"Your dress is beautiful," she added, pointing to where my dress was hanging by the window.
I nodded at her with a smile before she ducked out of the room, nodding to Adrian as she went. He took her spot in the room.
"Did you know that she was going to do that?"
Adrian shrugged. "She had mentioned at Vin's last appointment that she was happy for you and Dimitri. She's had some of her own health problems that are getting sorted out. Whatever she's on is helping. She actually pleasant to be around now," he said sitting down in the chair.
I scoffed a laugh and leaned back in my chair, rubbing my hand over my stomach. "How did she know I was pregnant? We've kept that pretty quiet from the media."
Adrian's ears tinged a bit pink. "That was my fault. I got excited over being an uncle again and let that slip. She was genuinely happy when she found out."
I pursed my lips and shrugged. "Well, you need to go. I have a dress to get into," I said getting up, rolling my eyes when there was another knock on the door. Adrian got up and got the door. Again, with another surprise, but one I was happy about.
"Janine."
Janine walked in with a smile on her face. She was dressed up beautifully in a vibrant orchid purple dress. It was long and off the shoulder with lace sleeves. The fabric cinched at her waist with small flower details there. It was feminine and beautiful and complimented her skin perfectly.
"Lissa said it was almost time to get ready. I thought maybe I could help you get into your dress?"
A surge of emotion shot through me and I felt my eyes water. I nodded my head and extended my hand out to her.
"I'd love that, Mom."
Adrian looked between the two of us before sending me a smile and silently stepped out of the room, going to get Lissa.
Hello, lovelies!
We are on the home stretch! Let me know what you think!:)
