Take A Deeper Look
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Chapter Six: Falling Down
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Ginny turned her head slightly when the door opened again. An hour later.
"Common room's empty."
She looked at him when he spoke. Nodding slowly, her knees popped as she stood. In her time of silence, she had had the time to realize just how hungry she was getting. She had found that throwing up your food, then not eating for another three hours made you feel like you needed to throw up . . . again.
Quietly, with Draco looking around every corner, the two made their way to the cold corridor. And Draco, knowing the way, led them to the stairs that would put them right at the Great Hall.
"Are you going to talk to Professor Dumbledore?" Ginny glanced at him from the corner of her eye. He nodded as if he knew she was looking. Once again, they stopped outside the Great Halls' doors. Ginny lifted her head, putting on a stoic face. "Draco, I'm –"
"Don't bother, Virginia; we both are."
Her face split into a small smile as he walked past her to enter the Hall. That was Ginnys favorite way of apologizing. She didn't have to say she was sorry, and the other person reciprocated her feelings.
As she stared at the ornate door in front of her eyes, Ginny knew that entering the room was not what she wanted. Instead, she followed Fred and Georges' instructions and walked to the kitchens.
"Hello, Miss!"
Ginny smiled down at the house elf, "hi there."
"What can Sparky get for you, Miss?"
"Um . . . I'll take some chicken and mashed potatoes, if you don't mind." Sparky was off before she had even finished talking, and back soon with her food.
"Here you go, Miss!"
Ginny sat down at a small table, "thank you very much, Sparky." She sat there, thinking of how she would explain to Ron why she had missed all but her morning classes. "Definitely won't be easy . . ."
Her thoughts, however, were not on her mind for long. She desperately needed to know why Draco had pegged her as his reason of opposing Voldemort. Why? What had she done? What had she said? "Why is he doing this?!"
"Sparky does not know a He, Miss."
Ginny jumped, lifting her chin from her palm, "Sparky . . . Oh, never mind me. I had better go. Thank you!"
" 'Tis a pleasure, Miss!"
The portrait shut quietly after she stepped through. Sounds of many voices flittered down from the upper level. "Guess dinner's over . . ." the realization caused an outburst as the petit red head ran up the stairs to the main level as fast as her legs would carry. If the excuse of being sick was going to work, she had better get to her bed.
Running down Parvarti, and scaring some first year Hufflepuffs, Ginny breathlessly said the password. "You look horrid, dear!" the Fat Lady rarely lied.
"Thank you!" Ginny yelled back as she entered. If all went well, she'd have just the right amount of time to change and get into bed. She had indeed timed it just right.
"Colin said she hasn't been in classes since lunch. Think she's still sick from the potion?" Hermione was like a mother hen sometimes. Just for good measure, Ginny rolled onto her side, face towards them.
"Ginny?" Ron stepped the rest of the way into the dark room.
No, Ron, you don't have to knock before entering a girls' room! Just come on in! she thought sarcastically as the three approached her bed.
"It looks like she has a fever," Hermione whispered to the boys. "Look, she's sweating!" Ginny held back a flinch as Hermiones' hand was placed on her forehead, then cheeks. "Let's leave her to sleep, she's got a slight fever."
"But –"
Hermione shooed them from the room. "She'll be fine in the morning."
No, she won't, Ginny found herself thinking. She pulled her knees up to her chin and curled her arms about them. Why did she always do this? If driving people away were an art, she'd be Van Gogh.
I've got to stop blaming myself. I wasn't the only one fighting back there. She chewed on her bottom lip, a habit she picked up around the age of four. Pulling the duvet over her head and groaning, she was sure that this was not her week. Couldn't break come any faster?
"Break!" she sat up so fast she got light-headed. Draco was leaving for the break to be Marked. How had she mutated his decision on sides?
~~*~~
"Ah, Mr. Malfoy. I hope you are well?" Dumbledore motioned for the boy to sit.
"Honestly, I've been better."
Snape raised an eyebrow. "Have you made your final decision?"
"Yes," Draco looked at his semi-surrogate father, then the man whom Voldemort feared. "I shall be a spy."
The spark quickly dissipated from Dumbledores' eyes. "Are you positive that this is what you want to do, Mr. Malfoy? Have you thought about the consequences?"
"Yes, sir."
With a suppressed sigh, the aged Headmaster nodded. "Then Severus shall keep you under his watch. You can go to your dorm now."
"Good night, Sir, Professor," Draco walked towards the door.
"And Draco?" he turned at the Headmasters' voice. "Do sort things out."
Things? What was he talking about? Nodding, Draco shut the door behind him. Once in his dorm, he found himself gazing at the now bare skin. In just two days, he would have the Mark.
Was he doing the right thing? Should he even go through with getting the Dark Mark? He didn't want to be the servant of a man doomed to fall.
But you're serving Dumbledore now . . . and he won't fall.
Still, Virginias' words echoed in his head. "I factored you in on the wrong side." Surely he couldn't have that much of an effect on which side won. How could she know anyway? No one could predict the way a war came out.
Yet she sounded as if she could . . . and had.
Damn that girl! In less than a week, all of his convictions had been flipped. How did she do it? He knew the answer to that question. He knew it was because she believed that he could be anything he wanted to be.
She is too nice to be living in a corrupt world like this! he looked up when his door was opened.
"So steadfast in your decision, Draco. If I recall correctly, this time last year you were very much steadfast in the other direction."
"This are often factored wrong, Severus."
Severus clasped his hand behind his back. "Such as?"
Draco's eyes drifted to the corner, then the balcony. "Her."
"Ah."
"I've fallen, Severus . . . And I wish I hadn't."
The Potions Mast knew exactly how his pupil felt.
~~*~~
Ginny felt like screaming as if she were a madwoman. That would just attract unwanted attention, which was exactly what she didn't want. Why were things so confusing!
"Hey."
Ginny snapped her head up. "Hermione?"
"I wanted to see how you were doing?"
Ginny shrugged. "Could be better."
Hermione closed the door before taking a seat on the sixth years' bed. "What's wrong?"
"Oh, I think it's just the potion or something. You yourself said I had a fever."
"I was lying, Virginia. It was obvious you had been running," Hermione replied.
"What?"
The brunette smiled. "One: you were breathing to hard for someone acting like they were asleep. Two: your eyes moved when I put my hand on your forehead. And three: I saw you push Parvarti."
"Oh . . ."
"So?" Ginny gave her a look that clearly said "so what?" Hermione smiled, "why'd you skip your classes?"
"I couldn't face them. I didn't want to handle all the questions," Ginny lied smoothly.
Hermione nodded, "I had better go work on my schoolwork. Are you sure you're –"
"I'm fine, Hermione. Don't worry about me," Ginny smiled reassuringly. She waited until the girl had left to flop backwards onto her bed. "Oy ve." She turned over to her stomach and sighed. Whoever said that life was easy, never went to Hogwarts. Sometimes she wondered if she made things seem more difficult than they really were.
Today was his last day. Draco was going to leave from Hogsmeade Station to avoid the other students. Ginny didn't know if she wanted to say goodbye to him.
She didn't know if she could.
She also didn't know if she should give him the present she had bought; it had been spur of the moment.
"Ginny, where are you off to?" Ron looked up from a game of Wizards Chess.
"Just mailing a package. Christmas and all, you know." She left the common room before he realized that Christmas was well over a week away.
Climbing the creaky stairs, she pushed open the door. Her slight hopes were whisked away when only the owls greeted her. Why did she think Draco would be up here?
Selecting an owl that looked fit enough, she tied the package with string, making sure the letter wouldn't fall. "Take this to Draco Malfoy's quarters, please." The own hooted loudly and took flight out one of the many windows.
"I hope you like it . . ."
~~*~~
Draco turned in his high backed chair when he heard the tapping. He wasn't expecting an owl . . .
The black bird, once relived of its parcel, took flight quickly back to the Owlery. Draco untied the string, picking up the letter first.
Draco,
A Muggle American president once said: "the only thing we have to fear, is fear itself." As you can tell, that one doesn't work well for you. Fear is not something you are allowed to possess. Just always know that you can win. You can beat him.
This Muggle was more to your workings: "In life, the road to darkness is a journey, not a light switch." See, you have a journey ahead of you. It's your choice to make it.
Wish you could have a more enjoyable birthday and Happy Christmas. Use your present well.
- Virginia
Setting the letter next to the parcel, he tore the paper off to reveal a book. "Wandless Spells from Here and There . . ." Draco opened the cover, leafing through the pages. Every so often, a page would be dog-eared.
How had she come across a book like this? Some were defensive spells, but more were for the offense; protection spells.
Even after the fight that had happened, she still wished him a happy birthday and Christmas? "You're too forgiving Virginia," he murmured as he sat back to read the book.
~~*~~
Ginny headed down the stairs slowly, watching for the trick step. She nodded her head to her own tune when she heard Colin.
"Ginny! Hey, Ginny!" she turned around and stopped so he could catch up. "Did you hear the rumors?"
This guy gossiped more than she did . . . "What rumors?"
"That Malfoy is leaving from the station to be Marked during first hour."
Blue-green eyes bulged. "Colin, do me a favor."
"Sure, anything."
"Take notes for me," she was all the way up the stairs, starting on the second she yelled back. "Tell McGonagall I'm not feeling well!"
"Why?" Colin sighed. "Ginny!"
Ginny ran through the corridors back to the Gryffindor common room. She heard a shout that sounded oddly like Ron as she ran by twos up the dorm steps.
"Where is it? Where is it?" Ginny flung her bag onto her bed as she finally found the cloak. She swung it about her shoulders and clasped it; she grabbed her broom on the way out.
Ron, Harry, and Hermione were leaving just as she got to the common room again. She slipped past, and sprinted to the main doors; she jumped on the broom as soon as she felt the cold air hit her face.
Ginny, however, could only hope she got there in time. Walking, or even running, was not an option. He would be gone by the time she got there. She dismounted and put the broom up against the ticket booth, straightening herself out and removing the cloak as she walked to the platform.
Draco stood solitary, with only a suitcase to keep him company. He didn't notice her until she spoke.
"Leaving already?" she set her cloak down on his suitcase, so she didn't have to hold it in her arms.
Turning, he forced down a jump of surprise. "What are you doing here?"
"That's a good question," Ginny smiled lightly as he turned to face the tracks again. She knew he knew there was no answer for his question. "How are you getting there?"
He paused before answering her and found it hard not to look at her. "Professor Dumbledore made my suitcase a Portkey. I leave when the bell tower rings."
Ginny nodded, though she knew he couldn't see it. "I guess this is where you leave me," her voice was just above a whisper. "I'm going to have to walk down that platform and turn the corner. Do me a favor – don't watch me leave. Don't expect me to come back and watch you leave me."
Draco looked at her, eyeing the clock before he turned.
"I'm not quite sure just how I should go about telling you goodbye . . ." she looked to him at last.
"Just like that, I suppose," he replied quietly. She looked so sad, all because he was leaving to be Marked.
Ginny stared at him, shaking her head slightly. She finally gave up on trying to talk to him and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. She felt him stiffen, and then slowly put his arms around her waist just as tight as she held him. She didn't want him to leave, but this time she couldn't have what she wanted. And she knew that.
She pulled back from him, searching his eyes, memorizing them as they were before they would become tainted. "Don't watch me, after I turn the corner," she reiterated. "I'll leave you . . . just as you leave me."
Draco could see the tears starting in her eyes. How was he supposed to say goodbye to her? "Virginia, I . . ." it was damn impossible.
Her eyes shifted behind him, to the clock. "It's about to chime."
Draco loosened his grip on the petite girl, watching as she dropped her forehead onto his chest. He placed a hand under her chin, lifting her eyes back to his. Ginny saw the slight smile on his face, and the sad look in his eyes. "I have to go soon . . ." he rubbed away the tear that fell from her eye with his thumb.
Ginny felt him lean in, and felt him hesitate. Why was he hesitating? She felt like she was being slightly tortured when his warm breath hit her lips, not knowing that she was doing the same to him. She lifted herself up to her toes and met him; her eyes fluttering closed as their lips met.
Draco found himself slightly surprised at her, but then he knew he shouldn't have been. So he just pulled her closer and wrapped his arms tighter around her again; she felt perfect to him when she was in his arms.
Ginny stepped closer, wrapping her arms tighter around his neck, but not so she would choke him. She felt so secure in his arms like this, but she could hear the chimes in what seemed like the far, far distance. She pulled back slightly, "the clock . . ."
"I have to go," but he didn't want to.
Ginny nodded, then kissed him again before stepping away from his arms. She didn't say anything, just looked at him as if it were the last time she was going to see him, then turned around and walked down the platform with dignity that Draco knew only she could possess in a moment like this. She broke into a run when she was almost at the corner.
Draco watched the corner, hoping to see her come back.
But she didn't.
So he looked down at his suitcase, to grab the handle, but blinked in surprise. Virginia's cloak was still draped over the black case; a note was attached to it. He picked up the cloak, enlarged it before putting it on, and tucked the note into his pocket.
He knew what it would say.
"Use it well, Draco . . . I do love you," Ginny whispered as she leaned against the ticket booth, holding back her tears the best she could.
~~*~~
Delirious – Deeper
Norah Jones – Don't Know Why
Avril Lavigne – Anything But Ordinary
Jimmy Eat World – Sweetness
Switchfoot – Dare You to Move
Avril Lavigne – Falling Down
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