Chapter Six
Ryan was left to think about Seth Cohen's endearing words. They writhed against his every hope, and doubt. The image of Marissa continuously flung itself into his mind: he could barely let go, he could barely think to ever let go.
He knew Seth wouldn't leave him alone. He knew that the consecutive knocks on the door, would be him with his face hanging low with unselfish attempts to get Ryan's spirits up. Ryan grumbled, as he threw his head back against his bed listening to the silent, selfless whispers that Seth had to offer, "Ryan," he said, and after realizing he was not going to answer, nor look up at him, he continued, "I'm kind of expecting you to do something stupid," he said, as he paced across the room nervously, "And all I'm saying, is that suicide is not the answer," he tried hopelessly to make Ryan smile, and yet he felt the matters worsening by the second, "Just a warning, Ryan. While you're all brooding and depressed, at least try to laugh at my jokes, okay?"
"Seth, if you can understand, there's not a single even pity-laugh I could give you. There's just nothing left," he said emotionlessly. His face was distorted into an oddly calm, but deepened sadness. Seth clasped his head in between his hand, realizing how doomed the situation was. He let Ryan absorb the only temporary silence he was going to be blessed with.
"I'm going to sit here, until you smile. Until you show me, that you're capable of moving on. I'm not asking for much man, maybe like, a millimeter of movement, okay? That's as much as I want to see you move on, right now. Actually, I wouldn't even call it moving on. Just moving." Seth spoke slowly, but sternly as he started to ramble, "You can't sit on this bed for eternity, Ryan. You just can't. That's why I'm going to annoy the hell out of you, so that you punch me, or something so I know you're listening." Seth smiled satisfied with his plan, "So Ryan," he paused, thinking of things to say.
Ryan raised his head lightly, glaring at Seth, "I will punch you, Seth. But I'm not getting out of this place," he said in an angered tone, hoping to get his message across, "Now you can shut up, or just leave." Although Ryan would much rather drown in his misery, he appreciated Seth's forceful company in the darkest altitude of his being.
Seth let a small smile linger across his face, one that held a spur of hope for Ryan. Seth didn't say a word, for a glistening fear that Ryan would carry on with his anger and actually hit him with such force that would knock him right out of the pool house. But soon he could barely resist. "Go to New York, Ryan." He said in a forceful tone, so that Ryan could not resist. Ryan looked up at him, and shook his head silently, "I'm not kidding either!" Seth said with a quirky voice that meant business, "You're going. I'm driving you to the airport- Heck! I'm coming with you!" he smiled with pride, as his eyes foretold an impetuous essence of true friendship.
"Seth," Ryan was about to debate, argue, stop Seth's scampering body already ready to leave.
Seth shot him a glare, as he raised an eyebrow cleverly, "If you don't go, I will. And I'm sorry to say, that I'm going to give her all the sorry goodbyes you wouldn't," he joked, but his face was as hard as a rock not betraying any sense of charade. Ryan looked up at him, almost begging him to simply sit down and let him bask in his own misery, "So, are you coming?"
Ryan didn't know what to say, "I don't even know where she lives."
Seth scavenged for Ryan's cell-phone, as he threw it over quietly. He folded his arms, as though wondering what Ryan would do next, "Seth, it's three in the morning!" Ryan said, as a final defense.
"Fine!" Seth said, "We'll go, and once we get to the Big Apple, then you'll call." He shrugged, "Even better. Then she can't refuse your arrival," he grinned, as though satisfied. Usually, Ryan would not think twice to listen to Seth's morose and pitiful ideas. But this time, he felt a spark of future in this one. He longed to run his hand through her golden hair, and to graze his lips against hers for the final time. He wished to say a prolonged goodbye, which she deserved so forthrightly, "Judging by the lack of disputes, we can go?"
Ryan let out a slumbering groan, which trailed off into a silent, unconvinced whisper by the end. Seth smirked softly, taking the answer as a yes, "Grab a few things. I'll be back with a few of mine. Don't worry Ryan, I'll only be there for moral support. The actual Marissa-confrontation, I'll leave you alone with. Unless, of course. You decide, not to come?" Seth stared at him, in the pit of his stomach wondering why he had such control over Ryan. Oh, but then again, he knew. It was Marissa that he wished to see, and his idea upon doing that was not half-bad, actually. In the pit of his stomach, he wished Ryan would gather his stuff as quickly as time would allow so that he could not think of reasons not to go, "Hurry up, Ryan. You'll be glad you did." Seth said, as he walked through the pool house doors, leaving Ryan in the pool house once more to drown in contemplation.
