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Chapter Nine.
Tony Stark was a strange man.
It wasn't that Allie didn't know this before, or that she thought it as an insult, but there were quirks and characteristics that made Allie think he was not on the spectrum of being wholly normal, as could be defined by many people. It wasn't meant as a mean thought, or a snigger behind her hand, but she couldn't help but define him as such. Maybe it was the flying suits he built, or the fact there was an A.I that he created that would chime in at the oddest of times, but Tony Stark was a strange man.
Allie supposed it kept her on her feet and allowed her to be ready for anything; she had thought those days that were frequent in customer service were over but, evidently, they were not. Not that she minded all that much; it kept her busy, kept her distracted and allowed her to put her usually wasted energy into something productive – or, of that sort. Over the month and a bit that Allie had been working for Tony Stark, she found herself slipping into something that resembled a routine more often than not; she would wake, get ready to go to work and arrive at work usually a minute or two late – something Stark never let go. She still floundered sometimes, having still a lot to learn about the profession of being an assistant but she liked to think she was getting the hand of it.
Or, rather, Allie liked to think she was getting the hand of understanding Tony Stark.
Seeing a celebrity superhero in such a personal space was… bizzare, to say the least. She was still trying to connect the mad she saw splashed over newspapers and tabloids to the one that drank boiling water one time because he forgot to put in the coffee grinds into his cup. That was something she herself could relate to but she tried not to laugh when he winced at having done so. There were parts of him that Allie had expected, tiny snippets of his personality that was shown on television that bled over into his real life. And there were parts that were… not expected.
In her head, Allie dubbed them "Quiet Days" because those were the days when Stark made sure to make as much noise as possible – save for talking. Those were the days Allie could instantly pick up on because as soon as she walked into the place, the room would be quaking with the loudness of his music. He couldn't be classified as moody or grumpy on those days, but rather there was an eerie melancholy to him that unsettled Allie as she wasn't used to such gloominess that seemed to ooze from him. Had she been less understanding, Allie might have left him to his own devices and simply withstand the bleeding of her ears from the sheer volume of his music; yet, she did not. So, "Quiet Days" soon became "Bug Tony Stark As A Form Of Distraction Days" too.
In her own experience of experiencing bouts of depression (she didn't want to project onto Stark but Allie couldn't help but find a snippet of those past and sometimes current experiences that she went through in him), distraction was what she needed, craved.
Allie became Stark's shadow on those days, hoping to at least provide some sense of comfort to the man when storm clouds rolled in overhead; sometimes, he let her talk about whatever she needed to ask him, sometimes he would chime in and, sporadically, he would even keep up a conversation with a weary tone of voice. Maybe he didn't have the heart to tell her to shut up as he had yet to send her away from his presence on those days when she was trying to make him know he wasn't alone.
And when those days weren't around, he resumed his normal way of life.
Though, normal could be a bit of a stretch.
"You know…" Allie began, stepping out from the elevator as she did so, the half empty and lukewarm cup of tea in her hand barely burning her palm as she made her way in further; there was no pounding sound of music and the only sounds she could hear were the jumbling of metal, clinking and crashing against one another. Her eyes made their way across the room, the glasses resting on the bridge of her nose making everything that bit easier to make out and Allie found herself being no longer surprised at the state it was in. More work for her later, Allie supposed; at least it would keep her busy. "When I said that some redecoration would liven up the place, I didn't mean for you to turn it upside down."
The room was a mess, as if a hurricane had rushed through and then an earthquake followed, which was led up by tornado that tore the place from top to bottom. There were trinkets and broken pieces that Allie couldn't fathom strewn all over the floor, speckled pieces of silver, grey, gold, black, red, and every shade in between. She could tell exactly what had possessed Stark to turn the place upside down, top to bottom but Allie remained somewhat apathetic due to the fact she was more than used to being in a place that was a mess – she was twenty-five, she practically lived in a dump until she realised that she was going to be the only person to clean up her own messes.
It wasn't an organised heap, like the first time she came here, and Allie sighed at the idea of having to pick everything up; it wasn't too bad, she supposed, it would keep her busy. Her secluded, small, designated area was untouched and that Allie was grateful for as she made her way across the room, and the sounds of tinkering paused for a moment before she could hear footsteps and there was Stark, peering out from what Allie had dubbed the Secluded Room as it was one of the places she had yet to fully see; sometimes her curiosity would prod at her to ask but she couldn't muster up the courage to do so, afraid it might be some top secret, super hero stuff. Allie doubted she would even be able to understand even if Stark tried to explain it to her in the simplest of ways.
Said man was grinning at her that moment, a mess and looking somewhat flushed but pleased to see her nonetheless, making Allie suspicious of what it was he was doing exactly to not point out that she was nearly a minute and a half late coming in. It wasn't exactly her fault that the person in front of her in the line at the coffee place was unsure of wanted full fat milk or skinny milk. Allie narrowed her eyes at Stark's rather delighted demeaner, placing her bag down on top of her desk alongside her cup as he remained unperturbed by her mistrusting look. His hair was a mess but he didn't look completely unkept, and Allie could even see that the splotches of purple beneath his eyes were less severe; this, she found, made her more relieved than she thought she could be.
"Allison, great!" Stark exclaimed, moving back inside the room and disappearing from Allie's view, voice echoing just that bit off of the walls as he called to her from across the other side of the workshop. Allied decided he was far too cheerful for her own liking but found that much preferred him on these days, when it wasn't all storm clouds and silence that was far too loud for her own liking. "Come inside here, will you?"
Allie blinked, surprised by his words and remained still for a moment, somewhat unsure if he was serious or not but quickly shook her head, the pony tail at the nape of her neck following the movement with strands tickling her throat and catching in the collar of her clothes. Unsure of why he needed her to go inside, but being far too curious to not comply, Allie shrugged off her coat and folded it over the back of her chair, ignoring the small shiver that ran through her at doing so; rubbing her palms together to rush away the coldness that had managed to seep into her bones, Allie made her way across the workshop as instructed, careful not to trip or catch her foot on anything that would end with her falling straight onto her face.
Making her way into the room, Allie found herself screeching to a stop as she took in the room, mind unable to comprehend it all; she gaped at it all, at the sleekness, at the holograms and at the suits – the suits that Iron Man wore, lined up on the wall and staring at her with their dark eyes. Allie's mouth all but dropped open at the sight, trying to drink it all in but there was so much and it was everywhere; she took in the sight of faceplates, gold and red, silver and grey, scattered throughout and it looked like a massacre with discarded limbs that were bleeding wires, piled together in different areas and every now and again sparks would bust from the ends, not exactly the picture of health and safety.
Her eyes wandered to the sight of holograms – real holograms that she had never had the chance of seeing before in real life instead of movies; she couldn't make out or make sense of what of what was pulled up, glasses on the bridge of her nose slipped as she stared at them, videos playing that she could barely hear save for the mumble of voices.
"Whoa," Allie breathed, her brain barely able to comprehend the magnitude of it all, unable to bend her mind around the concept of these being real things that someone actually created. She might have elected to stand there for a few hours, mouth dropped open and gaping at it all to drink it in had Stark not broken her attention, clapping his hands together to bring her eyes back to him.
"Amazing, I know, but instead of gawking, how about coming over here and giving me a hand?" Stark said, gesturing her over to the far side of the room where Allie first noticed the large suit of armour he was standing near, the size of it much larger than what she had expected. Confused, but curious, Allie moved towards him, becoming less and less sure at his request and what he could possibly need her help for.
Stark clapped a hand on the suit of armour, resting on its shoulder and Allie stopped in her footsteps beside him, looking to the eerie suit of armour and then back to Stark, befuddled and puzzled. "Uh, a hand?"
"Or both," Stark stated with a shrug before tilting his head to the side, examining her. "How strong are you?"
"I'm bordering between crumpling beneath any pressure and being out of breath after any form of exercise," Allie told him, uncertain of what he could possibly need of her that he couldn't do himself.
Stark weighed her words for a moment, chewing on the inside of his cheek before giving a nod to himself, turning to push away all the bits and bobs that lay around him to the side so as to clear a way for Allie and whatever it was that he needed of her. "That will do."
"What do you need me to do?" Allie asked, watching him as he moved before he decided he was pleased enough with his makeshift cleaning of the place and turned to her, brushing his hands off of his pants and sucking in a sharp breath through his teeth, gesturing her to move closer and placing his hand beneath the gaping hole that lay rooted into the chest of the suit.
"Well, I may have broken something and I need you to slip your arm in through that small hole," he told her, tapping the small circle with his index finger and Allie's face screwed up, staring at the gaping maw as if it might end up chewing her hand off and leave her with a bloodied stump.
"And do what, exactly?" Allie pressed, stepping in towards the suit and trying not to be intimidated by the sheer size of it, only just realising how tall it was and how expressionless it was. Part of her mind was convinced that it was watching her with its void for eyes, waiting for her to do as Stark asked only to chew her up and spit her out. The mere thought made Allie's stomach tie itself into knots and she pushed it away, not wanting to dwell on that image.
"There's a loose wire in at the bottom and I need you yank it out," he said and stepped aside to let her move in closer, standing to the side as Allie took a tentative step forward, hand edging towards the hold in the suit of armour and feeling like she was most definitely not qualified enough for this; she didn't understand how he could trust her enough to do this without breaking it or triggering an explosion. The thought of either made her hesitant and Allie turned back to Stark.
"What will happen if I do?"
"Honestly?" Stark queried, Allie nodding to his question and he gave a lift of the shoulders. Maybe it'll be fixed, maybe it'll blow up."
"And how do I know which one is which?" Allie questioned, feeling less and less inclined to do as he asked.
Stark didn't reply straight away, looking at Allie with what she believed to be a dead pan stare, as if he didn't understand how she couldn't understand the difference between the two. "If it's fixed, it won't explode."
"Right," Allie said, blinking and wondering how on Earth did she not arrive that conclusion. "That makes sense."
Allie reached further into the small hole of the suit, ignoring how it bit into her arm, edges and ridges digging into her flesh through the thin material of her top and making her wince. Her hand fumbled around, trying to grasp anything of the sort that resembled what Stark was talking about while hoping that she didn't pull the wrong one and end up causing the two of them to die in an explosion. The thought and threat of that happen made her palms clammy, fingers stretched and sore until she felt something that might have been what Stark was talking about brush up against the pads of her fingers.
Confident, Allie reached in further, arm bent at an angle but found she could not stretch further; each time she managed to pinch the loose and floppy wire between her index and thumb it fell due to her loose grip and the sweat that was clinging to her hands. A huff left her and Allie rolled onto the balls of her feet, height increased and the angle not as sore but it was no use and her hands continued to blunder in their attempt of taking a hold of the damned thing, wrist twisting and trying an assortment of different angles to take it but it was no use. Her feet were beginning to ache and her shoulder creaked at each movement and twist, making it no use and Allie blew a small, silent raspberry, retracting her hand and hissing at the dull aches that bloomed in her elbow and shoulder from being forced into awkward positions.
"I can feel it but it's just out of reach," Allie explained, stretching her fingers and frowning as Stark stared on. Rolling her shoulder and brushing the loose strands of hair from her forehead and the side of her face behind her ear, Allie bit her lip and pushed her glasses back up her nose, turning to Stark who was standing close beside her. "Can you get me a box?"
Stark blinked, unsure of what he heard and his mouth parted, creases digging trenches in his forehead. "A box?"
"Yes, please," Allie asked and Stark complied, leaving the room and she could hear him rummaging about, trying to find something suitable for whatever it was Allie was going to use it for. Allie cast a glance up at the suit, staring at it's cold, lifeless, metal face and stared into the darkness of where eyes should be but were not found. It seemed so much more in person rather than catching glimpses of videos online. It seemed bigger too, sleeker and less like the hunk of metal Allie had envision and seen captured before and, to her, it was towering, glaring down at her with its forever expressionless face. Truth be told, she didn't know how Stark managed to be around these unnerving this, let alone be inside of one.
Allie eyed the hole in the chest, staring at the gaping maw of where she had placed her had before and tentatively reached forward, fingers gracing the loop and ghosting around its edges, trying to peer into the darkness of within. She spanned the width of it by stretching her fingers until each one was pressed against the inside curve of the hole, eyebrows knotted together and wondering what was supposed to be there, why it remained empty, a void. Oh, Allie thought, it's that glowing thing; she twisted her hand around the inside of it, trying to remember the weird glowing orb that used to be in his suits and how he would carry it around with him and how it would glow from beneath whatever suits he would wear, shining beneath layers of silk. Part of her wondered where it was now but felt it too ignorant or rude to ask, retracting her hand as she heard the echo of his retuning footsteps.
Clutched between his hands was a small, flimsy looking square that looked like it could only hold Allie's weight before toppling. He handed it to her and Allie muttered a thanks before placing it on the ground, Stark's eyes lighting up in realisation and there, on his mouth, was a teasing and amused smile while he watched Allie with absolute glee as she tested the weight of the box beneath her foot before stepping up onto it, heart in her mouth as it wobbled.
"That is absolutely adorable," Stark cooed playfully and Allie tossed him a glare as she slipped her hand back into the suit, eyes narrowing into pinpricks as she continued her fumble about to find the wire again.
"Shut up," Allie murmured, ignoring the heat in her cheeks as she groped around, rising slightly onto the balls of her feet and distributing her weight to one leg before the box began to tip, threatening to fall but, before it could, Stark took a hold of it, crouching down and holding it in place for Allie as she worked, the young woman tossing him a glance but only seeing that joking glint in his eyes.
"You want a step ladder for when you need to get down?" Stark laughed and Allie retracted her arm for a brief moment, eyebrow cocked and staring down at the older man from where he crouched.
"Do you want my help or not?" Allie asked and Stark made a motion of clamping his mouth shut, mouth pressed together so as to stop himself from teasing Allie any further. With a satisfied nod to herself, Allie once more reached in to the suit, moving around until she caught a hold of what she was looking for once more, this time being able to take it in her palm with her fingers wrapped around it; a grin on her face, Allie looked down to Stark, rather proud of herself for accomplishing the task. "I think I got it!"
With a tug, Allie pulled it free, almost forgetting Stark's warning that had it not been the correct wire, the suit would most likely implode and Allie stilled for a moment, waiting for an inevitable bang but moments passed and nothing happened.
"There," Allie exhaled, quite proud of herself for not blowing things up and, relieved, Allie smugly retrieved her arm with the wire held snugly in her palm, Stark standing as she jumped down, holding it in front of him for him to see with his own two eyes. "Tada!"
Stark took it within his hand, a gratified smile on his face as he twisted it between his fingers before tucking it carelessly into the pocket of his jeans, as if it hadn't previously been the small fine line between dying in an explosion and living moments before. "Your freakishly small self has saved the day."
"I'm not freakishly small!" Allie defended, all but gasping at his statement – however true it was. She glared and eyed him up and down, giving a scoff in return as her arms wound themselves across her chest. "And you aren't that much taller than me; you're, what, five eight?"
A stifled breath left him and Stark clapped a hand over his chest, gripping at his shirt as if Allie had offended his family honour rather than his height. "Five eight and a half!"
"Yes, pardon me for forgetting the half inch there."
"That brings back memories."
Allie closed her eyes, drinking in a large breath before opening her eyes and releasing a hand that was around her to point her index finger at Stark, a warning. "Don't."
"Alright, alright," Stark relented but Allie knew that he would have given anything in the world to continue the conversation. He turned back toward the suit and tinkered with it, fiddling with the hunk of metal as Allie turned around, trying to take in more of the place as much as she could to sate her curiosity. A crunch of metal made Allie wheel around, watching with something akin to horror as Stark dismembered the suit, ripping the arm off with little trouble and ripping wires free, not really caring enough about the spitting and hissing wires that hung free from the stump of the shoulder. Allie winced at the sight and her eyes followed Stark as he made his way over to a free work table, the sight of him holding the scrap of metal somewhat morbidly comical.
"What are you doing, anyway?" Allie asked, unable to help herself, wondering if he would even indulge her in an explanation. Allie wandered to where he sat, watching him tear the arm of the suit apart, discarding whatever he deemed trash to the side without much care.
"Breaking down what I have left for scraps," he explained to Allie, not turning to face her as she sidled up to the side of the work table but remaining unbothered as she stared on watching him work. "Most of these are outdated, anyway."
"'Outdated'?" Allie repeated in disbelief. Surely, he couldn't be serious? Half the stuff here wouldn't have been possible ten years ago, even more. Maybe his idea of 'outdated' was far different to the normal standard of what 'outdated' meant. Allie gestured to the arm on the table, mind unable to make sense of any of what he was picking out and pulling apart. "This is what you call outdated?"
"It's not what I call," Stark stated, turning to Allie briefly to tap at the side of his head with a quirk in his lips. "It's what I know."
"Christ, if this is outdated, I'd love to see what isn't," Allie whistled as Stark gave a snort, turning back away from her as Allie leaned herself up against the side of the table, rms resting loosely across her chest as she did so. She was glad Stark wasn't one to send her away to do her work because, truth be told, she quite enjoyed his company and enjoyed talking to him, enjoyed that it was easy to have a conversation with him. Allie stared at the skeletal form of the suit and clicked her tongue. "Or, you know, maybe not. You ever fear about this turning out to be all like the Terminator?"
"Well," Stark began, giving a huff. "A young Arnold Schwarzeneggar hasn't appeared so, no."
"What makes you think these are outdated?"
"I made them a few years back after I… lost all my other suits," Stark told her but there was a shift in his tone, hands pausing briefly in their work and he shuffled in his seat, voice steel and stretched as if the words were hard to get out. Allie narrowed her eyes at his actions, biting her tongue in order to not blurt out anything that might make him uncomfortable or awkward, no matter how much she wanted to know. Stark coughed, as if realising the change in his voice and shrugged it off, not caring to explain himself to Allie, not that she minded; she wouldn't want to make things weird between them by getting all personal and emotional. "These were the first ones I made without having my own arc reactor to power them."
Oh! That was that weird, glowing orb thing she used to always see on him or in his suit, placed right where the gaping hole was in the one she had just seen; Allie's eyes glanced to his chest to see it blank, empty and void of the light and thought to ask what happened to it but decided against it in case it might be a taboo subject for him. She supposed she could always look it up on Google later but found the idea somewhat repulsive, that she could so easily intrude on his life and personal affairs without his consent or knowledge. Instead, Allie shelved the question for a later date and chose another one to ask. "So, you don't use them anymore?"
"They're not completely useless, just not as efficient as I would want them to be. There's always improvements to be made," Stark sighed and, as if to make a point, he ripped a strip of metal from the arm, leaning back at the shower of sparks that spat forward, tossing it to the side without as so much as a glance before pausing, eyebrows knitting together and turning to face Allie, a surprisingly serious look graving his features. "Can I ask why you're so interested?"
"You're kidding, right?" Allie laughed but there was no return quip and she stopped, looking at him confused, as he had looked at her earlier when asking about what would happen after she pulled free the wire. "You're asking me why I'm so interested in your suits?"
"Well…" Stark said, pausing on his words and thinking it over before giving an inclination of his head in confirmation. "Yes."
"Honestly? Because I think they're amazing and beyond fascinating," Allie replied truthfully, unabashed and unashamed to show her admiration towards Stark's creations and gimmicks. She wasn't going to pretend to think they were lame or uninteresting because they were far from it and she was dying to know how one could even set about creating one, how it even worked but knew there would be no amount of time on Earth for her to ever fathom it. "I can't even begin to think how they could work or how someone even manages to create one."
"It's not a revolutionary idea," Stark told her, brushing off her words and praise as if it were natural for him to do so. "I've taken what the armour of what knights used to wear, glorified it and just stuck a load of weapons on them."
"But it's so much more than that!" Allie burst, unable to believe that he thought so little of what he created, causing Stark to turn to her, shocked at her outburst and Allie shook her head, trying to form her thoughts into a proper sentence. "I mean, no one else has ever managed to replicate what you've made – which just proves how amazing it all is!"
There was a pregnant pause at her words and Allie should have known from the look on the face, how slowly he began to grin, that he wasn't going to take it as a compliment without trying to tease her. Stark turned to her face on, his voice cooing towards Allie – to her dismay, he looked frighteningly pleased and absolutely beside himself. "Aw, you're a fan of Iron Man."
Allie gave a splutter and a scoff, arms over her chest and turning away but she could feet the warmth in her cheeks, facing away from him but she could hear the sound of his chair moving around to where she was leaning on the table, a boyish grin on his face. It only made her turn even more red and defensive at the sight of the look on his face. "I am not."
"Want me to sign something for you?" He joked, elbow resting on the back of his chair and cheek against his fist, eyes positively alight with amusement at the whole ordeal and with Allie's words. She attempted to glare but knew it would have no effect on him – if anything, it would spur him on even more.
"No," Allie grunted, voice a void but it did little to deter Stark.
"'Dear Allison, you rock! Your number one fan, Iron Man.'"
"If I put that up on e-bay, I could be a millionaire," Allie shot back and Stark looked affronted at her suggestion.
"You wouldn't!" He gasped and a smirk slithered its way onto her face, her hand on his shoulder as she gave an almost sympathetic smile.
"Oh, I most definitely would."
"I'm priceless," Stark sighed as Allie retracted her hand once more, ignoring just how warm he was compared to her. Maybe that was how he was able to withstand the coldness of the place.
"Not if I try hard enough."
"My knowledge is priceless," he repeated.
"Okay, Mr. Stark," Allie complied, standing up and turning to go back to her normal workspace. "As you say, Mr. Stark."
"Wait," Stark called, making Allie turn to face him once more as he motioned for her to return to her previous space and Allie obeyed, watching him root around for a moment before retrieving what he was looking for; he handed them to Allie, her hands barely holding onto to the two objects as she examined them, finding them to be a magnifying glass and a small torch. She stared at them, confused, before turning her gaze upwards to Stark in order to get an explanation but he was walking away, going elsewhere to pull another chair from the other side of the room and dragging it back to where Allie stood. Sitting down on the new chair he had pushed into the desk, Stark nudged the one he sat on before towards her and Allie took it, ignoring how warm it was and how it seeped in through her clothes. "I need your help for a minute. Hold these there, will you?"
Without warning, and to her surprise, Stark took her hands and positioned them gently over what he was working on, each object in Allie's hand as he did so; she was forced to scoot herself in closer and there was an unbearable burning in her face and Allie was worried he might glance over to see her face on fire but he simply placed her hands in the way that he needed, using the light from the small torch to help him see better as he looked through to magnifying glass to better his view of the dismembered arm of the suit that was pulled open, spilling everywhere.
Allie was unsure, uncertain of what to do or say, tongue tied and staring down at the top of the desk in order to avert her gaze elsewhere because she didn't know where she was actually supposed to look and didn't want to end up staring at Stark and making it all uncomfortable. She attempted to angle herself away as much as she could but not too far so that she would have to stretch her arms as Stark remained oblivious to Allie's predicament, working silently and he was squinting to see better, like what Allie would do when she would be without her glasses.
Allie felt positively weird and felt even weirder for feeling weird because there was nothing to feel weird about but it was so weird and she wasn't used to being this close to Stark, wasn't used to feeling the wash of his breath over the back of her hands or his hand nudging hers down and upwards wherever he needed them to be. Allie's teeth gnawed on her bottom lip as she tried to concentrate on whatever he was doing as he picked and pulled apart the piece despite the fact she had absolutely no idea what he was doing. She felt tongue tied, mouth clamped shut and there was a quickness in her chest, tossing glances through her eyelashes at Stark as she tried to remember of what she had to do that day, of all the e-mails and calls that she had to reply to.
But her eyes became glued to the side of Stark's face as it was the most eye catching thing in their small world at the moment and he was everywhere; she could smell his cologne, the faint scent of metal and leather creeping in and there were the waves of his steady breathing that crashed and caught on the skin of the back of her hand. The stubble on his jaw was tidier, more shaped and the ends of his hair had a tweak to it, a promise of curling if he allowed it to grow longer. It was messy at the moment, as it usually was when they weren't going anywhere, and it was a mop on the crown of his head, ends catching on his temple and around the curve of his ear. His nose twitched, a small sniffle, and Allie watched as it scrunched up, small crinkles around his eyes and nose appearing at his doing so before smoothing out once more. The light was catching on his eyes and making them appear warmer, more golden and honey than anything; he nudged at her hand again, making it move down but Allie was only half aware at Stark doing this, too caught up in her study of the man to take notice.
He had thick eyelashes, too, though they were not long and whenever he was concentrating a frown would form on his lips, creases on his forehead appearing if was ever deep in thought; he seemed to have a habit of chewing on the inside of his cheek, making it dip and cave in whenever he did so and Allie watched him lean in closer, trying to see better through the magnifying glass she held, his breath burning her and nearly making her jump.
Allie knew Stark was handsome, she wasn't blind, but she never really got to see him so up close, so near as before to actually realise how handsome Tony Stark was.
"So, how long have you been interested in them?"
Allie blinked, eyes focusing back in and was horrified to find herself staring at Stark, unaware of doing so and felt embarrassed at having become so distracted. She gave a cough, glad that Stark was seemingly ignorant of Allie staring at him, preferring to focus on his work rather than acknowledging Allie's hazy gaze from beforehand; it took Allie a moment to remember how to speak, peeling her tongue from the roof of her mouth and sucking in a sharp breath through her teeth. Come on, Allison, get your shit together. "What, your suits?"
"No, computers," he explained and Allie's mouth parted, brow drawn together as she shook her previous confusion from her mind, the geas she was under now disappearing and freeing her mind so that she would be able to form a proper response.
"I wouldn't say I'm interested. I just like working with them. I started when I was little," Allie told him, trying to keep as tight lipped as she could. She always hated this, always hated people asking her these types of questions because it made her panic, made her feel as if they knew more than they were letting on. She forced herself to keep a neutral tone and to remain nonchalant, knowing that she was terrible at acting but trying her best anyway. If she pretended all was fine, then all would be fine. "There really wasn't much for me to do as a kid and I didn't like playing with the other kids around us."
It felt sad saying it out loud, however much truth there was to it but Stark remained unaware, unbothered by it but seeming interested enough to ask and to keep the conversation going, something which Allie was partially grateful for and partially dreading. She then heard the whispers of Mrs. Krüger and how she had told Allie that, when he was a child, Stark had little to no friends and how no one even wanted to play with him. It felt wrong to have this piece of information, to know it without his consent.
"You said it was your brother who taught you?" He asked and her mouth became drier, cotton wool shoved down her throat as her hands gripped the objects in her palms the bit tighter, the grooves in the handles pressed to her skin. She had hoped he wouldn't remember, would not have been bothered enough to ask and Allie found herself wishing that they were back in silence, that she was back to feeling weird and awkward. "Lift that up a bit, will you?"
Allie complied and raised her hand a bit and Stark muttered a thanks, waiting for her reply. Her jaw was clenched and Allie was relieved that Stark's gaze was elsewhere and not on her face as she knew he would pick up on her change in demeaner. "He helped me a lot. He always loved computers and whenever he was home he would be on it."
That seemed to catch his attention and Stark stopped, turning to her with a raised eyebrow and seeming for more interested now. It made Allie's stomach tie itself in knots and that lump in her throat formed, tight and choking and making it difficult for her voice to push past it. "Whenever he was home?"
"He didn't…" Allie began, shifting in her seat and trying not to shrink beneath Stark's gaze, feeling as if she was the suit now, being picked apart with his eyes and her tongue ran over her lips, swallowing the lump made up of all the words she wished she could say that was strangling her at the base of her throat. "He didn't really like being around my parents."
There was a look in Stark's eyes, one she thought might have been understanding and he gave a nod to her words. "Where is he now?"
"He's…" Allie drifted off, tongue tied and trying to very hard not to be so obvious; the words were sitting on the tip of her tongue, waiting to be said however much Allie dreaded saying them, dreaded hearing them in her own voice because it never sounded like her voice, never sounded like her. "He's not around anymore."
"Oh," Stark breathed, staring at her as Allie cast her gaze downwards to the ripped apart arm, trying to not think of it as being real, tried not to think of it bleeding, gushing and spilling everywhere. She hated feeling like this, hated having to say the words over and over again but knowing it was the truth, knowing that there were no other words she could use to explain it all to another person. "I'm sorry."
"It's been years and we weren't that close to begin with," Allie rushed, wishing to plough pass this topic of conversation as quickly as she could; Allie always hated, hated talking about family and talking about the past because she didn't like looking back, didn't like having to remember that car crash that was her childhood because it wasn't her, it was a disconnected part of her that she had long since left in the dust and it didn't make up the person she was even if it had a hand in guiding her to be the woman she was today. Her leg jittered, bouncing from where she sat and her knee was brushing up against the side of Stark's ever so slightly, the touch ghosting the other as she did so. "As we got older it got worse and he was hardly ever home."
"I guess siblings are like that sometimes," Stark agreed, as if sensing her discomfort on the subject and turned back to what previously held his attention. "Not that I would know."
"You were an only child?" Allie asked, though finding herself already knowing the answer; but it was rather asking a question she already knew the answer to in order to keep the flow of the conversation going or risk relapsing back into the previous subject.
"Unfortunately. It had its perks, I guess," Stark revealed, sitting back but there was a frigidness in his voice, as if he detested the talk of his childhood as much as she did but he did not relent in telling her. "Not many, but some."
"And is that what got you into… all of this?" Allie inquired, gesturing with a nudge of her head aimlessly to the suits he had and Stark clicked his tongue, fingers drumming on the top of the table, a rhythm Allie couldn't discern.
"Kids get bored and kids get lonely," he shrugged casually. "Plus, the Lego weren't that fun when you built all you could that was allowed by its limited plastic."
"Well," Allie grinned, teasing. "Not every kid is a genius."
"Don't I know it," Stark sighed dramatically, as if it had been some big burden for him to bear, as if he was an Atlas in his own right for being intelligent. "I hated being around people who weren't as smart as me or were insistent on treating me like the six year old I was."
Allie stared at Stark, trying to see him not as he was but as he used to be: a young, temperamental child but she found it quite hard to believe, to even picture; an echo came to mind, words that suspiciously sounded like they belonged to that wicked witch Mrs. Krüger, of how she described Stark as a child who would cry endlessly, mocking him for being emotional. It was hard to connect the description to the man that sat before her and Allie couldn't help but wonder what it was that turned him from the sort of child to cry over anything to… this. Not that there was anything wrong with him, of course, but he seemed to try and brush everything off with a sarcastic comment, to delve into work and tinkering to keep himself distracted.
Allie glanced at him, watching him heave a sigh and she squinted her eyes from behind her glasses, trying to conjure up the image of six year old Tony Stark in her mind, putting the pieces of information that had to a thought of him being young and temperamental, throwing tantrums and getting beet red in the face. The image of it all pulled a giggle from Allie and she clamped her mouth shut but not before Stark heard her, eyes darting towards her, untrusting and narrowed.
"You're laughing, why are you laughing?"
"I'm just – sorry," Allie trying to explain, pushing the need to giggle at the thought of six year old Tony Stark getting angry. "I was thinking of you being six years old and throwing a big temper tantrum."
Stark gave a snort, scoffing as he pulled himself up straighter in his seat, whatever he was working spitting sparks but now forgotten on the table as Allie placed the small torch and magnifying glass down on the table, arms slightly stiff and sore from holding them out for such a long period of time. "I was an adorable child so I got away with it."
"Oh, I don't doubt it – not to mention only kids can get away with anything."
"Well, I didn't get away with everything – just most stuff."
"Did you bat your eyelashes to get what you want?"
"How do you think I made it this far in life?" He asked and Allie pretended to be deep in thought, to show that she was putting in some serious consideration at his query, before grinning at her conclusion.
"By being more than just a pretty face?"
Stark whipped his gaze to her, blinking at her words as a smile slithered across his smile, not aware of the sparks that were becoming worse as the burst in small puffs, ends of wires becoming life with embers and Allie stared wide eyed at it while Stark remained oblivious to it all. "So you think I'm pretty?"
Another shower of sparks sent Allie reeling back, trying to get out of the burn zone while the legs of her chair screeched against the ground, sound harsh to the ear as her arms flailed to protect her face from being burned. Only at her reaction did Stark turn and realise what was happening, cursing beneath his breath but remaining unconcerned as he leaned over it once more, trying to pick it apart and Allie let out an exclaim of concern, trying not to think what would happen if he got a splash of sparks in his face. "Mr. Stark, careful!"
"It's fine, it's okay," He reassured, gripping whatever it was that was causing the malfunction and pulling it free with a little effort, the sparks dying down and Allie released the breath she was holding, as Stark threw the scrap piece away, calm and composed. "I have it under control."
"My life just flashed before my very eyes."
"How was it?" He questioned.
Allie pondered on the thought before pulling a face. "Boring."
"I don't doubt it," he muttered, that boyish smile once more on his face.
"Sticks and stones, Mr. Stark," Allie sighed, slumping down and pushing her fallen glassed back up the bridge of her nose, tongue clicking behind her teeth as she gave a disapproving shrug. "Sticks and stones."
"Should I pay some compliments to cushion the hurt?" He offered, voice taking a faux comforting tone.
"How about some extra money?" Allie snorted and Stark gave an unbothered shrug.
"Okay."
Allie blinked at his agreement and pulled herself up into her seat. "No, wait, I was joking – please don't pay me even more money. I don't want you to end up bankrupt."
"You don't like money?" He questioned, disbelieving her words and Allie shook her head in disagreement,
"Oh, no, I like money. I just like earning my money," Allie explained, not wanting to go too into depth about her weird belief. She hated living off of the money of others, hating having always to be dependent.
"How about I pay you back in some more lessons later this evening?" Stark offered and Allie's voice died in her throat, the words she was going to retort with dying at his suggestion. He remained unruffled and he had said it so naturally, as if it were such a normal thing for a boss and employee to do. She did like learning more and even highly enjoyed the small lessons he indulged her in but they usually only lasted for an hour or two, not enough for her to actually do or learn that much, or so she thought. "You're getting better than you used to be."
"This evening?" Allie repeated, unsure if she had heard him right. "As in, later after work?"
"Why?" Stark asked, turning to her with a grin on his face. "Have better things to do besides spending time with your boss?"
"Would it be sad if I said no?"
He pulled a face and gave a small nod of the head. "Kind of."
"Well, I'm sad either way. Sure, why not?" Allie relented, giving in and finding herself not to be as bothered as she thought she would be.
Truth be told, she didn't actually have anything planned for the evening – she never did. She supposed Lisa would be home that bit later than her but the two were usually so knackered by the end of the day that they usually ended up passed out in bed without being able to talk to the other. Allie found herself having dinners by herself more and more and she usually decided to get her breakfast in coffee places or convenience stores, electing that an extra fifteen minutes in bed was far better than having a soggy bowl of cereal in the morning; the only sacrifice was that she wouldn't be able to have a proper conversation with Lisa in the morning.
Now that Allie thought about it, it had been a while since the two even had a proper conversation; in the month and a half that she had been working for Stark, she was finding herself being more and more present here rather than at home, leaving earlier for work and leaving later for him. It had been unconscious, of course, but still, the sudden realisation made Allie pause. Since when had work become more important than her friendships?
Allie shook her head, discarding all those niggling thoughts that were worming their way into her brain and planting seeds of worry to sit straighter in her chair, turning to Stark with a determined look as an idea passed through her head. "But in return you have to check out the e-mails that you've been ignoring from me."
"But…" Stark began, sitting back into his chair and nose scrunched up, confused and puzzled. "I'm doing this as a favour, so why do I need to do that?"
"Because it would make you the best boss in the entire world?" Allie sang, grinning pleasantly and her voice was sweet, eyelashes fluttering and hands clutched together with her fingers entwined over her chest, just where her heart was in hopes of having Stark agree to her request.
"So you're saying I wasn't before?" Stark asked, unaffected by her sweet demeaner and cocking an eyebrow at Allie, making her retreat back into her real self and not the sickly sweet personality she would have to don in her old job or whenever she wanted something that Lisa was reluctant to give up.
Allie pursed her lips together in order to stop a smile spreading across her lips. "No comment."
Stark turned to her, looking like a puppy that got kicked. "Ouch."
"Okay, you're not that bad," Allie reassured, shaking her head and the wounded puppy look fell from Stark's face at her doing so instantaneously. Allie stopped her fiddling with the small bent piece of metal and placed it back onto the table, stretching her legs but finding that the position wasn't comfy unless she slumped in her chair in order to reach the ground that bit more. "I've had worse."
"How much worse?" Stark asked, narrowing his eyes at her words and Allie paused, sifting through the files in her mind of all the horrible experiences she's ever had during her life as a worker; there were far too many for her to count but there was one that stood out the most, making her grimace at the memory.
"One used to keep walking into the girls' bathroom 'by accident' whenever one of us used to be in it," Allie explained, nearly cringing at the memory and suppressing a disgusted induced shiver that ran through her; at her words, Stark stared at her, the look of revulsion that was on his face very similar to the one masking Allie's. The woman gave a nod of confirmation and Stark's face knotted itself together even further at being told this. "Yes, exactly."
"Alright, I'll do it," he said, waving her words off and rolling his shoulders, stopping his tinkering for a moment and pulling a face as if reminded by something truly horrible waiting and lurking at the back of his mind before giving a shrug. "It's been a while and I've been meaning to check my inbox anyway."
"How long is a while?"
Stark paused in his actions at her words, as if putting some serious thought to the question and scrunched up his face, turning to Allie with eyebrows drawn together with a crease forming between them. "How long ago has it been since 2013?"
"Dear God, and I thought I was bad," Allie snorted, not caring to think of the thousands upon thousands of e-mails that were sitting in her inbox, waiting to be opened but knowing it would never come to pass mainly because Allie simply dreaded having to sort through the mess, afraid she might delete something that turned out to be very important – but obviously not important enough as it would be sitting there for months on end with no reply forwarded.
"It's going to be a nightmare," Stark sighed, heaving his shoulders and exhaling deeply but turned to Allie, a mischievous and teasing smirk on his face. "But anything for my favourite assistant."
Allie gave a deadpan stare. "I'm your only assistant."
A grin lit up his face, bright and splitting across his mouth instantly at her words and he waggled a finger at Allie from where he sat, leaning in further as he did so. That tongue tied feeling from before returned and her tongue suddenly felt too big for her mouth, cheeks too warm as she found it hard to keep the eye contact up, trying to ignore the stilted breath that caught in her throat as he grinned at her. "My favourite only assistant."
Allie couldn't help but give a roll of the eyes, a snort in response but, truth be told, she didn't mind that much, didn't find herself all that bothered by the prospect of staying behind a few hours; in fact, if she were to think about it, part of her almost would much rather stayed here in his company than face going home.
Hello, hello! Just before I get into my A/N i'd like to answer a few of your reviews!
spacevoyage: thank you so much! i love writing about tony and allie's relationship because there are a lot of similarities between them but they have a lot of differences between them too. i just honestly love writing every interaction they have just as much as you guys love reading it! thank you so much and i hope you enjoy this chapter as you did the last!
pinkeye: oh my god thank you so much! i really love writing about tony and i can't wait to get back into his head and pov again (which may or may not be very very soon...). And last chapter was such a turning point for Allie because she realises just how much of a good man he is and how much he's done for everyone and he doesn't deserve all the horrible comments people make about it. though it's early stages, they definitely care for each other because you don't spend hours on end with someone nearly every day of the week without forming some form of attachment. they really do deserve all the happiness coming their way! (though they might have to suffer a bit for it...) thank you so so much for your support and kind words and for always showing your love for this fic!
guest: thank you! i love tony so so so much and i always have loved him and always will love him; i guess this fic is just a love letter to him? if marvel won't give him the love he deserves then i'll do it myself. thank you so much for reading and enjoying the fic!
FlyMeToTheMoon: thank you so much! i've always loved the fact that tony is just as human as the rest of us and i was so disappointed when the MCU basically retconned his mental illness or reduced it to just "oh ya he's scared bc aliens". Marvel can honestly tear my baby boy recovering from his mental illness from my bare hands. thank you so much and im glad you've enjoyed the fic so far!
eden: hadkjfak THANK YOU! last chapter was such a turning point with regards to allie's perception of tony and im glad you enjoyed it! allie is by no means supposed to be a perfect person and she makes mistakes and has flaws but that's what makes her HER - just like tony being a flawed human being who makes mistakes but he learns from them and always tries to better himself because of them and, honestly, that's why i love him so much because he doesn't pretend to be better than everyone, he doesn't go around pretending to know what's best for everyone and i will always love him for that. there is no force on this earth that can make me ever hate tony stark and i would fight to the last man to defend him. thank you so so so much for reviewing and leaving words of support! they always mean a lot to me!
LordSkyjacker: thank you! truth be told i'm kinda shocked about how much has happened but i think it's more so to do with the fact im updating so frequently. usually i would probably update once a every three months but i'm actually proud that i've been consistent so far! thank you so much for reading and dropping a comment!
PrincessMagic: thank you! i was genuinely so smug when allie defended tony and picked up on his discomfort - even though im the one who wrote it... but still! Allie is really learning a lot about tony and changing her perception about him and i guess you could say they're almost friends, or that they're on the path to becoming it anyways. Thank you so much for leaving a comment and for always supporting this fic!
SixPerfections: Thank you for the tip but my style of writing is the style im most comfortable using; i enjoy getting deep into the characters and i love breaking them down and knowing them inside and out. this is what i enjoy writing about most and, in the end, i love writing for ME; i write stories because i love seeing them play out and the side bonus is that the readers can enjoy it too. My writing has evolved a lot over the past six years and I am happy with where i am at the moment. I do hope you will continue to read and enjoy this story as you have so far!
i know i'm a week late but it's because i got my results out last week! and unfortunately, i didn't get my first college course choice - i was literally ONE SINGLE POINT off from being offered it. it got me down a bit and i ended up asking to defer the other course choice i was offered which is basically the same as the first but without creative writing. it got me down a bit that i wouldn't be able to do what i love but i wrote this to cheer me up and i feel immensely better now!
shout out to my friend who encouraged me to write this chapter when i didn't have the energy to! (he still has to read it even after asking me constantly for the link to it; he's kind of like my unofficial beta - meaning i pester him to read my fics and he always ends up doing it.)
Thanks for reading!
