Crimson Puddles
Summary: Catherine talks with Sam Braun while they all learn more about Nick's condition. Meanwhile, Nick's parents head straight for Vegas when they hear some of what's happened to their son.
It had been a week since she had seen anyone from their team except Nick. Nothing made her regret the fight she had gotten into with the others, and she had almost appreciated the suspension. At least I can stay with Nick… Lindsey was at school, and she knew the others would never come by when she was there.
Catherine sighed as she sat back. They were running even more tests on Nick. The fact that he was still unconscious and hadn't moved on his own since she had found him tore at her heart. More tears fell as she let out a strangled sob.
"Hello… Catherine."
Her head snapped up when she saw Sam move to sit next to her.
"W-what are you doing here?" She nearly shuddered when she heard how frail her voice was. I guess it doesn't matter… this is the only chance I get to let my emotions show. If Lindsey… if she saw me like this it would scare her to death…
"I… I said some things before… that were cruel. I have never… known you to be so… terrified. It made me think, and I realized how much your friend obviously means to you. Not to mention to Lindsey… and if anyone means that much to you… then they mean more to me. All I want is for you to be happy Catherine… you and Lindsey…"
"I… t-thank you…" She whispered as she quickly pulled him into a tight hug.
"It kills me to see you this way, Catherine. I can stay for a little while, and I hope with all that remains of my heart that he gets through this…"
"Oh please… I think everyone is just about sick and tired of your damn guilt trips Warrick!" Sara shouted as more faces turned to look at them.
"Who do you think you are? Just because you go and visit him every once in a while won't bring him back! For God's sake his odds of waking up go down drastically with every freaking minute!" He yelled back furiously. Mia and Archie were stone silent as they listened to the two continue to scream wildly at each other.
"You can't even look at him! For crying out loud what kind of friend are you? When he needs support you're running away!"
Grissom strode past the door quietly and sighed as he heard them fighting once more. Just yesterday he had seen Hodges trying to break up a fight between Sara and Greg. I can't do this anymore… I can't handle these… these people… I'm not sure if I even knowwho they are anymore.
He stood leaning against the wall for a few more moments when he suddenly heard Brass join in on the yelling as he roughly dragged Sara out of the lab and told her to go talk to Sofia about some case. His head sunk lower in the sudden silence that engulfed the entire lab as people slowly and silently went back to their work. I'm not sure I can do this anymore… No… I have to… for Nick… If he wakes up… I can't let him face this disaster alone… He slowly headed back to his office and quickly locked the door before starting on more paperwork. Something about the certainty of it calmed him, and he had hardly left the office over the past week. His eyes scanned the fairly blank walls, and he found himself shuddering as his eyes landed on the boxes lying near his door that held every insect related display he had once been fascinated by.
Now they merely reminded him of Nick. What had started this all. Something about seeing him covered with those welts from the fire ants had changed his perspective. Ironic… the things thatused tofascinate mealmost killed one of the people I'm closest to…
"Miss Willows!" Her head snapped up as she saw the doctor running flat out towards them.
"What? Oh, God... h-how is he?" She couldn't hide the desperation in her voice as he took a deep breath before beginning to answer her.
"Mr. Stokes… he… woke up for a few minutes…"
"Only for a few minutes?" She could hear the slight relief in her voice.
"Actually, after going into a coma, people don't just 'snap out' of it. When they first wake up it's usually only for a slight period of time…"
"So you think he's going to be ok?" She asked as she felt herself begin to slightly calm down.
He sighed as he tried to ignore the sudden surge of hope in her trembling voice. Just tell her… she'll find out one way or another…
"I… ok… ok might be a long shot... I suspect he will wake up, again, for a longer period of time… it's just that… that's not the probable extent of his problems…"
Catherine suddenly sat back down as she allowed his words to sink in. No… he has to be ok… I… I can't lose him… not after what he did for me…
"How bad is he?" Sam asked quietly as he watched his daughterstruggling in vain to control her emotions.
"I'm afraid we don't have too much, but he was clearly suffering through a panic attack for the few minutes he was awake… I suspect he'll suffer from depression, but from prior experience I'm afraid to say that it's likely he'll suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder… who knows what other problems. Emotionally he may never recover. And physically speaking, he may never walk again… and I suspect he'll be extremely lethargic. After the stress his body went through I doubt he'll want to move much at all, or even be able to."
Catherine quickly put her hand over her mouth as she thought about what the man standing there was actually saying.
"I… I'm so sorry… I'll let you know when he wakes up again; if you wish… you could sit with him now. Just let me warn you… he's been restrained… when he last woke up he gave one of the other doctors a pretty big bruise, and he nearly reopened his wounds…"
She slowly allowed him to guide her into the room where she finally felt her remaining hope disappear. Nick's skin was nearly white, and he had deep bruises on his wrists where his restraints held him firmly in place.
"Oh, Nick… I'm so sorry… none of this should have ever happened to you…"
She let out a small gasp when she saw his eyes slowly slide open, and she felt her jaw drop when she saw the look in his eyes. He's beyond terrified… She reached out to touch his hand, but winced when he recoiled and his breathing became heavier. She noticed for the first time that the tube from his mouth had been removed, in its place was a large oxygen mask, but she felt more tears come to her eyes when he started to tremble with his eyes wide, clearly showing his fear and apprehension.
He could feel the sweat clinging painfully to his skin. All he could see were the Plexiglas walls surrounding him, and just beyond them nothing but barren trees. No! I can't… don't let them… someone… anyone… please… please! Help…
Catherine slowly fell backwards into a seat as she watched Nick's glazed eyes grow even wider as his body suddenly went limp, and he was sweating and clearly more than exhausted from his fighting. The deep bruises on his wrists were slightly visible now that he was once more lying immobile. She silently shook her head in disbelief when he began to stutter a few words as he gasped for breath between his sobs. She could see the tears streaming rapidly from his eyes as he spoke just loud enough for her to hear him.
"Please… help… me… I… don't want to die… you have to let me out… please… don't hurt her… let her go… let her be safe…" His voice was weak, and she could barely hear the words through the mask, but there was no denying the weakness or the dismay in his Texan accent.
She quickly fought to regain herself, and slowly forced herself to stand and move closer to Nick's slumped form. She gently took a hold of Nick's hands, and nearly screamed in fright when he tried to sit up, and his eyes went even wider. No… please… you have to be ok… you have to get better…
Grissom sat behind his desk in disbelief. He woke up… Yet, somehow he was no longer so sure he could handle seeing Nick. The words that had just been given to him over the phone by Nick's doctor terrified him. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder… God, Nick… how did it come to this? More shouts erupted from outside his office, but suddenly he found himself becoming slightly interested in what they were saying. You've got to get the team back together. Nick did it before unintentionally… He may not be with us for long now… I guess it's left up to me…
"Everyone shut up!" Grissom stood in the doorway to the break room and fought the urge to smile when Warrick, Sara, and Greg immediately fell silent.
"Alright, listen up. Nick woke up… I just got a call from his doctor. He was up for a few minutes… Catherine is with him now, but we're all heading down there now."
"But… Grissom… I…" Warrick sunk into the nearest chair as his words dissolved into silence as his body shook violently.
"I don't give a damn, Warrick. This is about Nick. Not any of you. He needs us… we all know that he deserves the chance to live a life again, and we're going to give that to him. Look, the worst case scenario is that he becomes depressed and possibly suicidal… something he doesn't deserve. We're going to go head over there, and we're going to do our best to give him the opportunity to recover. Please… I'm begging you… put your differences aside… forget about the fights… just let him… let him have the chance to possibly salvage what remains of his life. Don't do it for anyone but him… he is going to need us now more than ever. I can't let him lose everything… not after all he's been through…" Grissom found that he no longer had the strength to lift his head and look at them as his voice went from firm and commanding to a pathetic whimper. He could feel the tears as they flowed, and he suddenly found his legs give way.
"You're right… he deserves better than this from us…" Warrick whispered as he felt his eyes drift slowly to the floor.
They sat in silence as the vehicle pulled to another stop. "I… I'm sorry Sara. You were right. I was just so scared… so scared to see him… if he died… I… I didn't want to remember him like that… not as some lifeless body in a coma…"
"It's ok, Warrick… I'm sorry too… I… I shouldn't have said those things about you. I know how much care about him…" Sara whispered back as they continued to stare out their windows not wanting to allow their emotions to once more overcome them.
"It's… it's not fair… he's already been through so much, and now… now he has to go through even more…" Warrick felt Sara softly pat his back as they turned to face each other slowly. Grissom gave Greg a weary glance, and he drummed his fingers on the steering wheel before turning on the radio. He quietly flipped through channels until he stopped as a familiar song started to play on one of the stations.
They sat in silence as the dreary song continued to play. Warrick glanced quickly back towards Sara before he returned his focus to the flashing lights of the casinos as they desperately hoped that Nick would be ok.
She wept silently as she gazed at Nick who was once more completely still. She could hardly see his chest moving up and down, and his face seemed unrealistically blank. No matter how hard she tried she simply couldn't see any hint that he had ever felt a single emotion. Come on, Nick… I know you can do this… you're too strong to go down like this… Her head snapped up when she saw the door slowly open, and she didn't have the chance to wipe the tears from her eyes when she saw the other members of the team slowly enter the room.
"H-hello, Catherine." Grissom offered quietly as they immediately took in their friend's appearance. Grissom quickly noticed the bruises on his restrained wrists, and the paleness of his skin, and the slight mist of his breath in the plastic mask over his mouth. He quietly moved across the room and embraced Catherine. He nearly expected her to fight back, but she merely buried her face in his shoulder and let even more tears flow.
"Why? Why did he do this to himself? He… he didn't have to do any of it… but… he did. He saved her… and he condemned himself to this…" she whispered as she struggled to remain calm. Grissom could feel her trembling as he tried to reassure her.
"It's who he is Catherine… if he sees someone who needs help he's the first to…"
"But, why, Gil? Doesn't he know that he's already been through too much? H-he deserves so much… after last summer… what's going to happen if he does become depressed? What happens if he never walks again? Things were supposed to get better… not worse…"
She slowly pulled away from Grissom and moved closer to Nick's still unmoving body. She silently ran her fingers through his short brown hair as she thought to everything he had been put through. This isn't right… how did he even make it this far? Please Nicky… please don't give up… please…
He could distantly feel his eyes trying to open. Several bursts of pain shot through him, and he couldn't hold back a loud cry. His hands immediately tried to take a hold of his shoulder as he felt the pain continue to build up. His eyes snapped open when he realized that he couldn't move his arms more than a few millimeters.
They instantlyfocused on Nick as he cried out in pain, and they could tell hewas waking up. There was no mistaking the tension forming in his arms, and the sudden look of pain etched on his face. They barely had time to prepare themselves when his eyes burst open, and he began to frantically pull against his restraints. Sara quickly turned away as tears started to fall from Nick's eyes. Without thinking Greg quickly moved in to try to calm the panicking man down, but he only succeeded in making Nick cower back and whimper in fear.
All he felt were hands pushing him back down. They were still holding him in place. Something stopped him from looking down, and all he wanted to do was to shrink back and to disappear. They'll go away… they have to… it'll be over soon… Slowly he felt is body stop moving, and no matter how hard he tried he couldn't even make his fingers move. What's happening to me? Why can't I move? What's wrong with me?
Catherine sighed heavily when they saw Nick's eyes close once more and his body went limp again.
"What if this is all that's left?" Greg whispered the question all of them couldn't help but think. He slowly let his hand wipe a tear from his eye as they saw the emotionless face on the man lying before them once more.
"I… I… can't…" Catherine burst out and she quickly spun to face the wall as she covered her face with her hands.
"You've got to give him more time. He's only come to three times…" Grissom whispered despondently as he stared at Nick's unmoving form. He silently prayed that he was right, and that given time Nick would be able to overcome all of this.
"Yeah, and each time hepanicked and struggled until his body couldn't move anymore!" She responded trying to keep her voice calm. "He… how is he supposed to live like this?"
Before anyone could respond a few different doctors entered the room with a few nurses and they quickly began to rearrange the various pipes and the restraints holding Nick.
"Uh… excuse me? What exactly are you doing?" Greg asked as they moved another bed next to the one Nick was lying on. A nurse quickly removed the blankets from Nick's once more unmoving body, and he bit his lip when he saw the restraints on Nick's legs. They quickly untied the padded bonds, and they all found their eyes staring at the deep bruises from his struggling. Moments later they were once more covered by the restraints as they positioned him on the gourney.
"Oh, we're getting him ready for some more tests, and he'll be up there until we can evaluate his current mental status."
"Hey, could you show him a little respect?" Warrick snapped at the doctor's perfunctory statements.
"Listen, we're sorry that this happened, but sugarcoating this isn't going to help anyone. For all real purposes he could be suffering from PTSD, depression, and possibly even have certain parts of his brain shut down on him."
"Look, arguing isn't going to get anything done, so just tell me, has his family been informed?" Grissom questioned loudly making sure he stopped anyone from making the situation any more tense.
"We took the liberty to leave a message with his parent's secretaries." He answered as the nurses took advantage of the distraction and hurriedly wheeled Nick out of the room.
No one noticed when she silently entered the courtroom. All eyes were intently focused on the attorney who was currently giving a speech. She gently walked up to the wood barrister and stood patiently waiting for him to stop. As soon as he had stopped speaking and had gone to take his seat she pushed the wooden gate open, and quickly marched up to the bench.
"Michelle… what are you doing here?"
"I'm sorry Bill… I've got some terrible news…"
"What happened?" He demanded firmly as his mind instantly thought back to his son as he struggled in his glass coffin. Please let my children be ok… please let them be ok…
"Y-your son… Nick… he went into a coma… the doctor that called said that he has already come to three times, but they still aren't sure of his condition. I… it might be better if we finish this somewhere else…"
"Ok, I'll call for a recess…" He said as he quickly stood up. "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid we're going to have to have a recess."
The man that she had seen earlier immediately rose before directing him, "May we ask why, Your Honor? After all, we are almost done here…"
"I'm afraid something of a crisis has come up, and I need to further discuss it with my secretary."
"But, sir… certainly you know the importance of this case!"
"I do, thank you very much, but perhaps when one of your children goes into a coma you'll understand. Court adjourned until further notice." He quickly slammed the gavel down, and didn't wait for anyone to respond before he disappeared out the door with Michelle following on his heels. As soon as she closed the door behind her he wheeled around.
"Did they say what happened?"
"No… but they did say that he was shot twice, and that for some reason he put an excessive amount of stress on his body afterwards."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean? Did they say how he is doing otherwise?"
"I'm sorry, Bill… I don't know what they meant, and otherwise… well, they said they were checking to make sure he didn't have any brain damage, and they are running tests to try and see if he'll suffer from any long lasting physical injuries. They're hoping to perform a psychological evaluation to see if he's suffering for PTSD… and they're not sure he'll be able to walk even if he recovers otherwise…"
"Oh God… listen, call Judge Michaels, ask him to fill in for me, and call the airport and get me a ticket on the first plane leaving for Vegas. Then call Jillian. Make sure she knows I'm already on the first flight out, and then call my kids… they deserve to know..."
A half-hour later he was sitting impatiently in his seat. His hands firmly clung to his knees as he tried to stay calm. God… what have you gotten into now Pancho? It's only been a few months…He slowly forced himself to try to remember everything he knew about comas, as well as victims of Post Traumatic Stress.
"Hello, Lily."
"Sam… I was wondering if you were going to show up to talk to me."
"Listen, Lily… I never did right by you, or Catherine… I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to realize that the only family I ever had that was worth anything was because of you. I… her friend showed me that there are still good people out there. That good deeds are possible, and I was hoping to find a way to make up for all the mistakes I've made…"
"I… I wouldn't have any problem forgiving you, but what about Catherine? What about Lindsey, she's only thirteen, and she hardly knows who you are, what would you even say to her?"
"I… I have to find a way to make this right again…"
It seemed like they were waiting forever in the small room where the bed was now empty. Catherine was still clutching Grissom, and he was trying his best to comfort her as she let herself break down and cry silently into his shoulder. We'll never find solace without you… you've got to get better, Nick, otherwise… it's all over…
She froze as the bailiff handed her the sheet of paper. It took all her strength to not burst out in tears as she reread the note. No… it can't be… Nick… oh… please be ok… Without hesitating she rose from her seat, and hastily addressed the judge before she walked brusquely up to the bench.
"What is it Jillian?" He offered quietly as the other attorney made his way up to the bench.
"What is going on? It's been a long day, we don't exactly have all the time in the world…"
"Just let her speak Mark." He responded curtly as he turned back to Jillian.
"We have to push this case back… or at least get someone to replace me."
"Why?"
"I just received this note… my son, Nick… he went into a… a coma… they said he's woken up a few times, but they don't know the extent of what's happened to him… I… I have to go… I have to see him." She bit her lip as she felt her eyes begin to water despite her best efforts.
He quickly scanned the message, and sighed as he remembered how he had seen her son on the news after his abduction the previous summer. "Alright, you go ahead and leave. I don't think there should be any arguments, especially after everything that has already happened to your son. Have a safe trip, Jillian… and I hope he's ok."
"Thank you so much…" Shefrowned in fear of her son's conditionas she felt her stomach churning. Her steps echoed through the room as people watched her leave not bothering to hide their curiosity. As soon as she was out in the lobby she was met by her assistant who merely handed her a plane ticket, and followed her to the main entrance.
"There is a cab waiting to take you to the airport, and I've already called the airport in Vegas. They've arranged to have a taxi waiting for you the moment you arrive to take you to the hospital…" She took a deep breath as she followed her boss out the door, "I'm really sorry… I hope he's ok!" She finished calling out as she watched the older woman run as fast as she could down the polished stairs and towards the waiting cab in her heels and skirt.
An hour later Jillian Stokes was sitting silently in the airport waiting for her flight. He's going to be ok… Bill will be there in about an hour… he'll be ok… he'll wake up… he'll snap out of it. He's strong… he's always been strong… if anyone could make it… he could. Please, Nicky… please be ok…
To Be Continued…
Notes: You may not have noticed any major changes, but I was rereading the chapter a bit, and I thought some of the parts seemed a little cheesy, so I went back and changed some of the minor details. I was also informed about some facts with Schizophrenia that I wasn't aware of, so if there were any mentions to that disorder in previous chapters, sorry. Hope you all like the slight changes, and as always please review!
Next Chapter: Nick's father arrives at the hospital only to find Nick's friends alone. Nick wakes up, and the doctor's perform their tests. Meanwhile, Nick's mother finds herself close to breaking down when she gets on the plane, and Sam Braun talks with Catherine's mother…
