Chapter 4- New York, New York!
Chandler and Monica were sitting next to each other on the flight home, much to Rachel's amusement. Somehow Chandler had managed to escape the leopard-print clutches of Janice by saying he was flying to New York and being diverted to Yemen from there- it was amazing that she still believed he was living there! That was definitely one of his more successful lies to Janice.
Chandler leaned over to Monica and said "So…there's a good airplane bathroom up there? Wanna get some of the Chan man again?" He gestured to himself "subtly", knocking over his drink as he did so. Monica raised an eyebrow. Rachel was right. There was no hope for her and Chandler.
"Er… look you knew that was just one night right?" She searched his face for an answer.
"Well sure!" Chandler's voice had gone all high again, as it always did when he was even slightly perplexed. "Of course! That was…what we agreed right? Just sex!"
Monica smiled "I know yesterday we said we could take it further but I just don't think it works you know? I mean, I know Ross and Rachel went out, and Joey and Phoebe have that…oddly sexual relationship… but that's not a reason to get together is it?"
Chandler was slightly surprised but he was sure he'd get over it. "Me and you? Can you imagine me in a serious relationship? I'm Chandler! You're Monica, the one who wants the babies and I'm Chandler, the anti-commitment freak with a high libido!"
Monica patted his arm "Are you ok?"
Chandler nodded. "Yeah I'm fine it's just I wasn't expecting this… then again I wasn't expecting last night either…" he muttered as an afterthought.
Monica frowned. "What happened last night?"
At this point Joey walked past, and leaned across their row
"He slept with Janice! I mean dude come on I know you were desperate but there was no need to go off and find her!" He sat down and opened a packet of peanuts. Mid-munch, he said "Seriously, how drunk were you last night if you found JANICE irresistible?"
Chandler put his head into his hands. Uhoh. He looked to his left, at Monica. She looked like she was going to explode. He laughed nervously.
"Say Joe, wanna go on up there and get me some nuts too? I mean peanuts…not nuts…I have nuts…two, actually" He slapped his head. Joey raised his eyebrow and made a quick exit. There was no way he wanted to hang around listening to Chandler's sexually frustrated rambling about genitalia.
As soon as Joey was out of earshot, Monica whacked Chandler hard on the shoulder. Chandler recoiled, looked at her and whined "Ow!" in his high pitched voice.
Monica said to him "THAT was for cheating on me, and THIS" she hit him again "is for cheating on me with JANICE!" She folded her arms and looked at the clouds out the window.
Chandler shook his head, staring at Monica in disbelief.
"What? W-what? How did I cheat on you? It was one night of sex, that's all! You just said it!"
Monica sighed. "Yes, but you didn't know that last night did you? You thought it was going to go somewhere, and then you went and slept with Janice! I mean…urggh!" she shook in exasperation and flipped open a magazine about cleaning products.
Chandler could not believe what he was hearing. "I can't believe what I'm hearing!" he very nearly exploded. "Y'know what…so what? We can put this whole surreal experience behind us now. It obviously meant nothing to you because you suggested it ending…not that it started…and it obviously meant nothing to me because I slept with Janice!"
Monica nodded. "Exactly. So that's that. Nothing happened in London."
Chandler agreed. "Nothing. Nicht. Nil."
Monica finished the conversation with "Ok then! Nothing happened and it never will".
When Joey returned with Chandler's peanuts, he and Monica seemed to be in deep conversation, so he went and sat down next to Rachel instead, who was next to them.
"Hey Rach, enjoying the flight?"
Rachel closed her copy of Vogue and looked like she was thinking.
"Well lemme see…it's been 5 hours, I haven't been able to move, the guy next to me who's in the bathroom is spilling over into my seat, and my ex boyfriend just got married! So, not too bad…"
Joey's face creased in concern "Ohh it'll be all right! You'll get someone as soon as Ross did! You're hot, smart, funny you'll be fine!" Rachel smiled. "Aww Joey you know how to cheer me up"
"Right, so let's forget about Ross and have a good rest of flight huh? Hey, tubby, you'll be sitting there for the rest of the flight." Joey directed the obese man into the seat next to Chandler, who looked round in alarm to see the man's stomach spilling into his seat.
And with that, Rachel put Ross and Emily to the back of her mind, and didn't think of them again for a long long time.
Rachel, Joey, Monica and Chandler got off the plane feeling quite upbeat, and glad to be back in America. Chandler and Joey were even singing 'New York New York'- Joey was doing the 'babadadadaaaaa's, and Chandler was singing. Rachel and Monica were dying of embarrassment.
They left the terminal with their bags, and saw a large blonde woman standing outside the airport
"PHEEBS!" they all cried
Phoebe waved and waddled over to them- being almost 9 months pregnant she wasn't as light on her feet but she was still glowing.
"Hey guys! How was London?"
"Oh it was great! Small and quaint, but good! Glad to be home to you four now though- Pheebs and the triplets Joe" Monica added as Joey frowned.
Phoebe smiled. She was glad they had a good time but still it was without her. But there seemed to be tension between Mon and Chandler so that was good.
"Right! Let's get a cab!" Chandler hailed a cab and they all squashed in, to go back to their apartments.
