Mistake of Light

Chapter Four: Does he know?

"Time to dig in!" I exclaim with a half a talk laid out with desserts and my irritated partner next to me.

"How do you not get fat from those?" I hear the low-toned retort.

I glance at him with a pout, the fork upon my lips, my eyes glittering with pretend tears. He sighs and I ask him, "Do you want some? Strawberry Shortcake? Castella? Chocolate pudding? Apple Danish? I even have green tea ice cream (yummy)..."

He looks away. "Agh...I'm getting sick just listening to it."

"Aww..." I try, "Come on, try the green tea ice cream. It's sooooo good, and not that sweet either."

"You're sweet enough," All I hear is sweet.

"Huh?" I inquire to which I receive nothing. But I consider it nothing. I take no pause to dig my spoon into the creamy green dessert and put it in my mouth. It brings upon me a shiver but I enjoy the cold already melting on my tongue. Delicious...

I look back at my partner and smile because I know that when I smile others will not worry about me and sometimes they may even smile back at me. I want...at least I think I want...to see Hisoka smile at me.

But I am only a little disappointed when he doesn't, instead claiming himself a chair and turns his head to the window of falling pink blossoms, his chin resting on his hand. I muse for a moment at how completely youthful this boy, whom I call my partner, is. He is such an attractive boy too with soft pale skin, transparent emerald eyes, an intricate pair of lips, shady brown hair, and a matching nose; how absolutely stunning. Is it possible for a guy to look so beautiful?

I am suddenly reminded that I am staring at him when he softly scolds, "What is it?"

I smile nervously. "Nothing."

"If you've forgotten, let me remind you that I can sense your feelings," he states coolly.

I grimace. Oh no! I forgot! Does he know?

But Hisoka doesn't give any indications to my question. He looks unmoved. "Now, hurry up and eat. We need to get back to work soon."

I nod obediently and put some food into my mouth but I can't concentrate on how good it tastes because I cannot take my mind off of the one next to me.

Does he know that I feel that way about him? Is he disgusted with me? What am I supposed to do if Hisoka rejects me?

I then sense him stare at me. I continue to eat nervously, avoiding eye contact.

-End Chapter Four- Eat, just keep eating, don't look at him...