Chapter 2 - Day 1
- NEXT MORNING -
Lois opened her eyes sleepily. Sunlight got into her eyes, and she squinted. Where was she and how did she get there? Lois got up and yawned, stretching out her arms. Of course! She was in Clark's room. "Funny.." she said to herself. "I don't remember getting here..." Maybe i got drunk she thought with a shrug, but crossed that out as a possibility. There was no way she had drunk any liquor the other evening. Clark would have murdered her if she had brought any strong stuff. Lois put on her robe and smiled as Clark came to mind. That boy was so uptight. Someone needed to loosen his strings, and she felt that it was her duty to do just that.
"Morning, Mrs. Kent!" Lois cheerfully called out, getting down the stairs in record time. She plopped down on a seat at the kitchen table and grinned angelically.
Martha turned around from the sink and smiled at her. "Lois! You're up early, sweetie. I didn't expect you to come down until at least eleven," she said, wiping her hands. She then took her frying pan and put some bacon and eggs onto Lois' plate.
"Now who gave you that idea?" Lois asked, taking a fork and thanking Martha.
"Clark. He said to expect you to come down after lunchtime, but I knew he was exaggerating," Martha replied, sitting down herself to a plate of breakfast.
Lois laughed. "Well, I wanted an early start today, because I was thinking of dropping by to see Chloe," she said. Suddenly, she noticed that it was only her and Martha eating breakfast. "Are the guys still asleep?"
Martha shook her head as she drank some juice. "No, sweetie. They ate an early breakfast and drove down to tend to the livestock," she said.
Lois nodded her head and shrugged. "Ah, too bad. I was thinking of bringing Clark along with me to Chloe's. Oh well, just please tell him to join us after his chores are finished," she said, biting into a piece of bacon. Suddenly, she got an idea. "Umm..Mrs. Kent?"
"Hmm?"
"Does Clark have any plans for this whole week?"
Martha looked up from her plate. "No, nothing that I know of. A water pipe burst overnight at his school, and they've closed down for repairs. They said it'll take over a week for them to get things back in order," she replied.
Lois brightened. "So Chloe doesn't have school either?"
"Nope. You know, it's odd about the timing of your visit. Now, you'll be able to have a good time with your friends here in Smallville," Martha said, smiling.
"What can I say?" Lois said, grinning, "It's fate." Martha smiled back at her.
"So, Mrs. Kent.." Lois began again. "What exactly will Clark's farm chores be now that he has no school?" she innocently asked, biting into some bacon.
"Well, first he has to help milk the cows, then bale some fresh hay, and then get rid of the cow manure...After that, he'll probably help his father feed the livestock...and if any of the fences are broken, he'll fix it..and then.." Martha went on and on with the number of chores Clark had to do before lunch.
"Wow, how does he get all of that done so fast?" Lois asked, curious. Was it her imagination, or did Martha suddenly look nervous?
"Oh...Experience I guess. He WAS brought up on this farm," Martha replied, not missing a beat. Lois just nodded.
They finished their breakfast, talking about random things. Afterwards, Lois helped Martha clean up. They were just finishing stacking up the dishes, when Martha suddenly said, "You know, I'm glad you came, Lois."
Lois smiled. "Really?" she asked.
Martha sighed and sat down. "Yes. I was so worried when I found out Clark would be having a whole week entirely to himself. It isn't good for him to be alone," she said.
"About that, " Lois said, taking a seat in front of Martha. "He DOES seem a bit..i don't know..Reserved?"
Martha chuckled, "Yes, I know. He likes keeping to himself, but that usually gets him depressed over...you know..."
"Over what?"
"Well, his unsuccessful love life among other things," Martha replied, making sure not to reveal everything.
"He acts like he's forty when he's only eighteen."
She looked so worried just then that Lois took pity. This woman had been so kind to her, almost like a mother. Lois decided to do her a favor. "Don't worry, Mrs. Kent," she said, "I'll make sure to keep him busy the whole time I'll be staying here."
Martha looked up and smiled a little. "Is that a promise?" she asked.
"Definitely."
THREE HOURS LATER
Chloe's Apartment
"Why didn't you call me last night? I was waiting!" Chloe asked, as soon as they were done eating their lunch.
Lois just rolled her eyes as they sat on the couch. "Oh, sorry about that. Smallville and I were too busy bickering over every possible thing we could think of, so I kinda forgot," she replied.
Chloe laughed. "Oh come on, you don't mean EVERY possible thing," she said, nudging Lois with her shoulder. "Clark isn't that bad."
"Oh, you'd be surprised!" Lois said, as they both sat down on a couch. "The dork wanted to eat PLAIN popcorn. Said it was much healthier and crap. I on the other hand, wanted butter. HE tells me it's fattening. And then I asked him if he was trying to imply that I was FAT. And then he gave me that sad, 'I'm sorry I didn't mean it that way' look and tries explaining, but it took too long, so i just told him to forget about it."
Chloe stared at her. "...So who won?"
"Me, of course!" Lois exclaimed.
Chloe rolled her eyes and began flipping through a magazine on the coffee table. "Don't tell me you guys fought over what soda to drink as well," she said, jokingly.
"As a matter of fact, we did," Lois said. Her cousin stopped flipping through magazines and raised an eyebrow at her. "Farm boy wanted Pepsi, and I wanted coke," Lois explained, "He said Coca-Cola was too sweet, and I said Pepsi was too bland. We ended up compromising and drank our respective soda's."
"Oh, welll..." Chloe didn't know what to say. "I'm sure you guys didn't argue over which Friday night movie to watch, did you?...I mean...you're too mature for that," she said.
Lois blinked. "Well, actually--"
"Oh my GOSH, Lois, do you two fight over EVERYTHING!"
"Not everything," a deep, boyish voice spoke from behind them.
Chloe and Lois turned around to find Clark standing in the doorway, his hands in his pockets. He wore a smug look on his face and was looking tauntingly in Lois' direction.
"How long have you been standing there, Kent?" Lois asked, crossing her arms.
Clark shrugged and started walking towards them. "Long enough to hear everything," he said. Lois growled and "humph!"ed, getting up to look around the kitchen. "You COULD have knocked," she said, opening the fridge.
"You two left the door a bit open," Clark explained, gesturing towards the door.
"It's closed, Clark," Lois said.
"That's because I closed it. It was OPEN before I closed it."
"And how do we know you're not lying?"
"LOIS!" Chloe muttered under her breath in a warning tone. "It's no big deal, he's been here a hundred times. Seriously, can't you two just get along for five minutes?" she asked, exasperated.
"No," Clark and Lois replied very seriously. Chloe made a noise indicating that she was frustrated, and crossed her arms with a pout on her face. Switching on the tv, she started watching a commercial, making a point that she wasn't going to speak to either of them unless they behaved.
"Awww, Chloe, come on, don't be mad," Lois begged, sitting next to her cousin. Chloe just gave her a look. "Okay, fine! We'll..TRY to play nice...Won't we, Clarkie?" she said, turning to look at Clark.
Clark shrugged and said, "Okay, i guess."
Lois smiled and cleared her throat. "See, Chloe? We'll be nice from now on. Just for you," she said reassuringly. Chloe, however, didn't look so convinced.
"Prove it," the blonde said. "I bet you guys can't even STAY nice to each other for a full ten minutes," she added.
But Lois was already shaking her head and getting up. "See, that's where you're wrong, cousin. Me and Clark?" She swung an arm around Clark's shoulders. "We're best friends! Right?...Clarkie?" she said, looking up into Clark's face.
Clark, who had gone rigid with Lois' arm around him, just stared at her and said, "Stop calling me Clarkie."
"Listen, you," Lois hissed in a low whisper. She pulled on Clark's jacket and looked hard into his eyes. "If we don't play nice for ten minutes, Chloe might never speak to us again. Do you want that?"
"Fine. But just ten minutes," Clark grumbled. Lois let go of him, and they both turned smiling faces to Chloe, who was still sitting on the couch, looking suspicious.
Lois cleared her throat and put on a huge smile. "WELL! Why don't we go and sit next to Chloe on the couch and watch commercials with her, CLARK?" she said.
"That is such a good idea, Lois. Let's go!" Clark said, rather too enthusiastically. They both plopped down on the couch on either side of Chloe.
"SO, Clark," Lois began. "How's life? How's your education?"
"Oh, things are going just SWELL, Lois! You know a water pipe burst at school, and I have no classes for a whole week..." Ohhhh crap, Clark suddenly said, as he realized what this meant. He'd be spending time with Lois, FULL-TIME. He looked up and hurriedly finished his sentence, "..Of course..I still have to do some homework the teachers assigned to us..and then do some extra reading, because it'll be difficult to catch up.."
"Clark, you work too hard! But you know what, that's good. At least you're not WAY behind like I am."
"What are you talking about? You're NEVER behind. In fact, you've got such good studying skills! That's what I admire most about you," Clark said, trying to prevent himself from gagging. He checked the clock. Was it ten minutes yet?
Lois laughed a little too loudly, "Oh, Kent, you simple FARM BOY, you're too NICE to me!"
"No, no, Lois, you NOSEY PERSON, it is YOU who are too nice to ME."
Lois put on a bland smile. "I'm thirsty. I'm going to go get some drinks," she said, getting up and walking into the kitchen.
"Let me help you!" Clark said, following her. Once they were safely out of earshot, he hissed into Lois' ear, "SIMPLE FARM BOY?"
"NOSEY PERSON? You need some help with your NAME-CALLING, Smallville!"
"What, I couldn't think of anything else to call you! And you ARE nosey, you know!"
"How dare you--"
"What's going on there?" Chloe's voice interrupted their heated whispers.
The pair smiled and walked back to the couch, carrying a few cans of soda with them. "Nothing, Chlo! Just getting some soda," Lois said, plopping back down beside her. They were all silent for a few minutes, sipping from their soda cans and eating some chips.
Suddenly, a commercial for State Farm insurance came on, and, as if by reflex, Lois suddenly spoke out loud, "Hey, Clark. Is that..YOUR insurance?" Suddenly, she realized what she was doing. "I mean, it SHOULD be. It fits just right with your uh..farming abilities and all," she finished nicely. Chloe gave her a look that seemed to say, "Smooth..." Lois glared at her. "By the way, Clark, I love your shirt," she added.
Chloe and Clark turned their heads to look at her. "You like his shirt?" Chloe asked, pointing to Clark. "Since when did you like Clark's SHIRTS?"
Lois crossed her arms. "Since now. You see, I used to think plaid was drab and unstylish...plain and unattractive. Something only dorks would wear...("We get the point," Clark butted in)..But you know what, Clark here has helped me see the error of my ways. When I saw how well he carried the whole plaid look, my eyes were opened. I once was blind, but now I see. Plaid is the BOMB!" she finished, smiling brightly.
Clark bit his lower lip to keep from smiling. He could get used to this "nice" stuff. "Why, uh..thanks, Lois. I like your shirt, too," Clark replied without thinking.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Lois suddenly asked, a dangerous tone in her voice. Her eyes had suddenly narrowed.
Clark held up his hands in defense. "What? I really do like your shirt!"
"Please explain."
Ugh, this was torture, Clark thought. "..It's er...very nice and..it does a good job of showing your figure." He almost threw up right there.
Lois raised an eyebrow and looked down at her low-cut blouse. "Uh, thanks," she said. Seeing the incredulous look Chloe was giving Clark, she said (a naughty glint in her eye), "By the way, Kent I adore your body. It's everything masculine should be. You've got a GREAT, rock-hard chest, as well. I bet you've got better man-boobs than Tarzan."
"Uh...thanks, Lois. I think yours are...just...spiffy," Clark said, forcing himself to keep his eyes to the wall.
"Aww! Thanks, Clark. You know, I grew them myself," Lois said, looking down and smiling as if she got these kind of compliments every day.
"I'm so very proud of you."
"OKAY, OKAY, WHAT THE HECK!" Chloe suddenly stood up, waving her hands around. "What's wrong with you two!" she almost yelled.
Lois and Clark stared at her. "What? We're just being nice," Lois stated. "Yeah," Clark echoed. "Nice." br
"Yeah, I kind of NOTICED that. You know what, forget it. You can stop being nice. It's too scary and weird for me to handle," Chloe said, shaking her head.
Lois raised her eyebrows. "THIS coming from the creator of the 'Wall of Weird'? Gosh, Kent, we must be really good," she said, winking in his direction.
Clark smiled. "So we have your permission to be ourselves, Chloe?" he asked.
"I'd kill you if you didn't," Chloe said, grinning.
Lois and Clark heaved out sighs of relief. "I didn't mean ANY of that, by the way," Clark said, waving his hands.
"Suuuure you didn't," Lois said, smiling slyly.
Clark blushed. "Hey, what are you--"
"I didn't mean any of the stuff i said too," Lois said, interrupting him, "Especially the plaid part. Really, Smallville, you need to freshen up your wardrobe. You can't keep looking like a picnic blanket every time i see you."
"Yeah...thanks, Lois. And about YOUR shirts--"
"HEEEEEEEY, WHO WANTS TO PLAY SOME OF DAD'S VIDEO GAMES?" Chloe boomed, getting up from the couch and plugging her father's play station into the TV. Although it was nice having Lois and Clark fighting again, she couldn't have them arguing the whole time they were with her. It got kind of old.
"Great idea!" Lois replied, getting up and looking through Chloe's video games. "Gosh, Chloe," she said, holding up some football game, "I didn't know you were into this kind of stuff."
Chloe waved a hand in reply, saying, "Nah, that's not mine. It's Dad's."
Clark got up and grabbed the game from Lois' hands. "Well Mr. Sullivan has great taste. I think we should play this one," he said, reading the back of the cover.
But Lois was already shaking her head. She held up another cd and stuck it into his face. 'Dance Dance Revolution,' Clark read. Hell no, he thought.
"But Clark. I want to play THIS one," Lois drawled, waving DDR in his face.
Clark glowered back at her. "FOOTBALL is a better game, Lois," he said. "It helps you build up your strategic skills, and it gives you an idea of what moves to make when you're out on the field. It can also--"
"--give you lumps of cellulite by just sitting there on the couch for four whole hours, letting your thumbs do all the work," Lois finished for him. She grabbed the football game from his hands and tossed it away. "THIS, on the other hand, will really give you a good and thorough work out. It even shows you some great dance moves," she explained.
Clark groaned. "Lois..." he began, but then his gaze shifted to Chloe, who was looking pleadingly at him. He sighed. "Oh all right. Let's play...Dance Dance..Revolution," he finished, wincing. Man, was he going to kill her when they got home.
Lois squealed and asked Chloe to bring out the DDR mat. After everything was plugged in, they started choosing what song to dance to. "Clark, you go first," Lois finally said, picking out 'Boom Boom Dollar.'
Clark stared at her, horrified. "WHAT."
"You heard me! Now get out there and show us some moves," Lois said, pulling Clark off the couch and shoving him onto the dance mat.
Chloe started laughing at the puzzled look on Clark's face. "Come on, Clark! You guys are spending the rest of your afternoon here anyway, so shake yo thang!" she said, clapping her hands.
"How do you even PLAY this game?" Clark asked, staring at the television. Music was blaring out of the speakers, and a bunch of bright lights and dancing figures covered the screen. It made him kind of dizzy and confused.
Lois groaned. "The ARROWS, Clark, the ARROWS! Gosh, you are so SLOW!" she said, getting up and hurriedly showing Clark what he was supposed to do.
Clark finally got it and tried following the game, cautiously stepping on the arrows printed on the mat. He was a really interesting sight, as he shuffled his feet and almost tripped all over the place. Lois rolled her eyes in frustration, and Chloe shoved a fist up her mouth, trying to stop her uncontrolled laughter.
"You're not HELPING, Chloe!" Clark said, suddenly turning around and facing his friend.
But Chloe and Lois were pointing at the screen. "Clark!" Lois said. "Don't stop, it's getting faster! Move it!"
"Huh?" Clark asked, focusing on the TV screen. Sure enough, the beat was picking up and the arrows were scrolling down really fast. Clark tried going along with the speed, but all he got was "BOO!" or "NOT GOOD ENOUGH" or "POOR."
Clark, finally ticked at the bad reviews he was getting, stopped and said, "Oh, so THAT'S how it is." He then gritted his teeth, focused on the arrows, and willed himself to move accordingly. "I'll show you who's boss," he said, stamping his foot on the front arrow.
"Yeaaaaah, Clark!" Chloe clapped her hands. "You can do it!"
"GO KENT!" Lois laughed, waving her arms around.
An hour (yes, an HOUR) later...
Lois and Chloe stared, watching Clark stamp his feet on the mat, grunting and mumbling to himself. It seemed that he had been really pissed off by the low scores he got (he actually took them very seriously), and had demanded a "rematch". "Put it on HARD!" he had ordered. So now, there he was, dancing the night away. It was kind of weird though, because it didn't look like dancing at all. In fact, it looked like he was squashing a bunch of bugs with his feet in a systematic way.
"...Do you think we should stop him?" Chloe whispered to Lois, looking scared and sounding worried. She eyed the mat Clark was "dancing" on and imagined it getting destroyed in a few minutes time.
"Uhm...nah...Let's just..wait it out," Lois whispered back, but looking kind of worried herself.
The dance finally ended and Clark punched a fist into the air as a really high score appeared on the screen. "HA! YES! THAT is what Clark Kent is MADE OF!" He was just about to press the "Okay" button (the game had asked if he wanted to try a higher level), when Lois and Chloe came up behind him and took hold of his arms.
"Oooookay, Smallville, I think you better calm down," Lois said, pushing him onto the couch.
"NEVER stop a man on fire, Lois," Clark replied, panting. Drops of sweat were forming on his forehead. He tried getting up again, but Lois pushed him back down.
"You know you're really good at this dancing stuff, Clark, but I think you better stop before you kill the mat," Lois explained, gesturing to the dance mat Chloe was beginning to fold. It looked a bit flatter than it was before.
Chloe was laughing. "I'll just tell Dad that Clark got a bit carried away," she said, stuffing the flattened mat back into its box. Then she got up and looked at Lois. "Nooow...How about some karaoke?"
Hours Later
"UH UH OHHHH GO TOTALLY CRAZY! FORGET I'M A LADY! MEN'S SHIRTS SHORT SKIRTS, UH UH OHHHH.."
Clark sat on the couch, totally bored, as Chloe and Lois screeched "Man I Feel Like A Woman" into their lil' microphones. They must have sung that song at least ten times, he thought to himself. The song was getting stuck in his head, and Clark knew that wasn't a good sign.
"...Color my hair, do what I dare..uh uh oh.." The girls sang, "I wanna be free and feel the way I FEEL! MAN--" They stuck their microphones into Clark's face. "I feel like a woman," he dully finished for them.
"Didn't hear you, Clark!" Lois yelled, her microphone still in Clark's face.
"I FEEL LIKE A WOMAN!" Clark shouted. Then he settled back down, his head in his hands, mumbling, "That sounded SO wrong..."
Lois and Chloe broke into peals of laughter and whooped as the song ended. "Okay, okay. I think that's enough, ladies," Clark said, trying to grab the microphones from them.
Lois danced out from his reach, however, as Chloe picked another song. "Fat chance, farm boy! You had us sitting for eternity with your stick-figure-like dance moves earlier! This is PAYBACK," Lois said.
Clark rolled his eyes and checked his watch. "Guys, come on. We have to get home, it's almost dinner time," he said, as the tune to another song began playing.
"Come one Clark, just one more song!" Chloe said, dancing to the beat.
Clark looked at her seriously. "Chloe, it's six o'clock. Besides, your dad will be home any minute, " he pointed out. He started to get up.
"Awww..." the girls complained. "Oh,well, that's okay. We're going to camp out in Clark's back yard on Tuesday, anyway," Lois said, hugging Chloe.
"We are?" Both Chloe and Clark asked, looking surprised.
"Yeah!" Lois said, flipping her hair. "Since there's no school this week, I thought we'd do some crazy outdoor stuff," she said.
"Uhhh...Do my parents know about this?" Clark asked, looking skeptical.
Lois shook her head. "Nope. But they will! Now, let's go, CLARKIE. You don't want to be late for church tomorrow, do ya?" she asked, grabbing Clark's arm and leading him out the door. "Bye, see you on Tuesday, Chloe!" she yelled over her shoulder.
"Bye!" they heard Chloe call back. The door shut firmly behind them.
As they walked outside, Clark watched Lois look around quickly. "What is it?" he asked. There was nothing weird going on that he could see.
"Where's your truck?" Lois asked, looking up at him.
"Umm.." Crap. Why was he so stupid as to super speed to Chloe's place? He should have thought of this! "I didn't bring a truck," he said.
Lois raised her eyebrows. "Obviously...So how'd you get here?" she asked, curious.
"My dad dropped me off," Clark quickly lied. He hated lying to Lois, but this was for the good of mankind.
Lois nodded her head and started walking towards her car, gesturing for Clark to follow her. "Oh okay," she said, "For a minute i thought you walked all the way out here."
Clark coughed and got into the car. "He he. Me? Walk out HERE?" he asked, fake chuckling.
"Yeah, that's what I thought," Lois replied, backing out of the parking lot.
As they drove home in silence, Clark found himself unconsciously humming to the song Lois and Chloe had been singing earlier.
"You know, I have the CD if you want to listen to it," Lois said, grinning.
Clark stopped humming and groaned. "No thanks," he said.
A few more minutes of silence passed between the two, when Lois suddenly asked, "So how was the movie last night?"
"It was great."
"Sure. You didn't look like you were having much fun."
"If hearing you yell out 'BARBECUE!' when Faramir's father lit up that pile of wood where he was trying to kill himself is your idea of fun...," Clark began, shaking his head, and looking out the window.
"Whaaat? Come on, I was hungry during that scene!"
"And you wouldn't stop swooning every time Legolas came onscreen either."
"Oh, come on Clark. You were practically drooling each time Liv appeared."
"Her name is ARWEN, Lois, and I DID NOT DROOL."
"Come on admit it. You think she's hot, don't ya?"
"No, I don't."
"How about Viggo?"
"What ABOUT him?"
"Think HE's hot?"
"What -- NO!"
Lois chuckled to herself as Clark turned away from her, annoyed. She absolutely loved getting under his skin. He was always so easy to irritate. "By the way," she said, "Did you carry me upstairs last night?"
"Yes."
"Was I snoring?" Lois asked, trying to keep their conversation flowing until they got home. Clark was being too darn quiet for her taste.
"Like a donkey," came the reply.
"Donkeys SNORE?"
"Well you sounded a lot like one last night, so yeah, I guess they do!"
"Whatever, Clark. I do NOT sound like a donkey."
"Well next time I'll be sure to make a video of you. THEN you'll see."
