4. A remarkable little chap.
No sooner had the words left his lips, than Chris regretted uttering them. He wasn't sure why, but something just told him to be ready to duck. He had stood outside the door for a full thirty seconds before finally he had summed up the courage to knock. While he awaited the inevitable response he thought back to what Beast Boy and then Cyborg had told him. He had asked his questions and had even managed to fish out a few reasonable answers. As far as he could ascertain, Raven was a very secretive and private person, 'tell me something I don't know' Chris had said when he was told this. What had shocked him was just how little the two Titans he was interrogating knew about their friend. He had to admit that from what he had seen of Raven, she would not be the easiest person to get to know, but even so, they knew next to nothing about someone who they had lived with for a significant amount of time.
One particular piece of information which had made Chris groan had been when he had learned about Raven's peculiar take on 'friendship and trust' and thus her obvious hostility towards strangers. It was only when he heard this that he realised just how bad what he had said could be seen as. That was why she had been so taken aback by what Chris thought was only a mediocre comeback; she would have been very stung by the part of his comment regarding her friends. He had then and there realised just what a bomb he had dropped, that isn't good, Chris had told himself.
He had also learned about Raven's sometimes explosive temper. This worried him, true she could have exploded at him back in the main room, but he had a sneaking suspicion that she was not one to display any emotion, especially not in the presence of a complete stranger or the likes of Beast Boy. Apart from that small amount of information on Raven he had also learned of the two remaining members of the Teen Titans, Robin and Starfire. Apparently they were heading home as soon as they had taken another look at the alley just in case any evidence pointing towards the gang members that remained free could be found. Chris hoped they had caught the big thug who had been the cause of the whole mess. That would have made him feel much better, though he had told the others that he was feeling much better, which in part was true, Chris had to admit to himself that he was still in a very large amount of pain.
He could only wonder at how much worse it would be if Raven had not treated him with such professionalism and tender care. It was this kind of thought that had forced Chris to trudge up here to the forbidding door of Raven's room. That and when Cyborg had returned and Beast Boy had inevitably spilled the beans, Cyborg had said that it would be a good idea if Chris apologised. The distressing part was the fact that while Cyborg had said the right thing to do was apologise, he had also said that the sensible thing would be to avoid Raven. With this moral dilemma it was thus that much more surprising when Beast Boy had come up with the wisdom that finally made up his mind. 'You should go and say you are sorry, I can't be sure whether she will forgive you or not, but I would guess that the longer you leave it the more Raven will bottle it up, and that just cant be good, especially with her'.
After this surprising yet enlightening comment it was decided that he would go and apologise. The next few minuets had passed with a barrage of advice and counter advice. For the most part it was Beast Boy suggesting, and Cyborg telling Chris to disregard it. Personally Chris would have preferred to follow Cyborg's advice which was to just go up there and say he was sorry, short and sweet. However considering Chris was disregarding Cyborg's advice by apologising at all he wasn't sure he had a lot of faith in his opinion on this matter. After being given directions to Raven's room he had stumbled along, glad of the opportunity to clutch his ribs and let out an anguished moan that had been waiting to escape ever since he had left the infirmary. So he had followed the directions supplied and had thus wound up in front of the door he currently gazed at.
"Er, Raven."
Said Chris a little louder, but still well below the level of his normal voice.
"Er, ok then, assuming you are actually in there, and that your just ignoring me in that spiteful manner that you do so beautifully, I would like to apologise for what I just said to you, it was wrong and I had no right to do so, I'm sorry."
Having said this and still not having received any response Chris began to think that there really wasn't anybody there, and that he was talking to a door. Then again, he thought, she could be in there waiting for him to say the right words, or just go away. Deciding on a new tactic he prepared himself for the annoyingly easy task of verbally destroying himself. If it worked and she forgave him then it would be worth it, of course if didn't work then he would only achieve depressing himself further, and that would be a feat on its own.
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She could hear him on the other side of the door, every part of her wanted to launch herself at him, pin him to the ground and then destroy him in some extremely painful way. But she didn't, she kept herself back by sheer willpower, that and by the fact that he had apologised, which at least partially made her feel better. Still, she refused to even acknowledge his existence. But he was still there, just on the other side of the door, she could picture his face trying to think of some other way of saying sorry, but there was no way he could ever say it that would make her forgive him, because there was no way he could say anything that would give her back her confidence in her friends and herself. From Chris's side of the door came the sound of shuffling feet and a sigh, a painful sigh perhaps, she certainly hoped so.
"Look Raven."
Came his voice again now with a saddened tone to it.
"I really am sorry for saying what I said."
Raven remained unmoved.
"I just, I just said the first thing that came into my head."
Raven growled at this, she knew that he had thought about what he had said; he had picked those words especially for their effect. Now to confound it by lying, he was really asking for it now.
"I just wanted to say something that would, stun you, that's all, but now I can see that I went too far and for that I am eternally sorry."
He would be eternally sorry if she got her hands on him, why wouldn't he just go?
"I've got a nasty habit of saying things that I don't really mean, and it seems it's followed me here."
She silently nodded but said nothing. Another world weary sigh came through the door.
"Look I don't expect you to forgive me, I certainly wouldn't, but I just want you to understand, I really didn't mean what I said, I'm just tired and I'm in pain and its all just getting to much, I just cant handle it all this fast."
Raven's expression softened momentarily but then returned to an angry glare, so what if he was getting stressed, he didn't know the real meaning of stress and besides what gave him the right to take it out on her. At least he didn't expect forgiveness, that was a saving grace at least.
Finally after a significant pause she heard the sounds of him slumping his shoulders in defeat, banging his head on the door and some low muttering that she couldn't quite make out.
"Ok look, I have many deep dark secrets, I suspect so do you, I don't really get on with people to well, and I always mess it up, sooner or later. When you started dropping the signals that I wasn't wanted I became scared, frightened that I would be left alone again. I hate being alone, I feel, well, alone, I guess you feel alone sometimes, by the way, the way I said what I said so that I called you stupid, that was wrong and I didn't mean it, oh and also about the, colleagues, bit, that was just plain cruel, I should never have said that, and I will likely burn in the fires of hell for it, because its not true, and you know it, you always have, and they always will, be your friends that is, its obvious, even to me and I have only been here a while, you have good friends here, and probably always will, and I would like it if I was able to become one, but I wont press my luck, I am ever so deeply sorry."
Raven almost smiled at this, she still felt the anger but she could now feel it receding, it seemed wrong to her that the person responsible for her rage should be its destroyer, but strange as it was she wasn't complaining. Like that the rage fell away, the images and doubts and worries all faded into a corner of her mind where they were safely locked tightly away. He had done what she couldn't do, he had saved her from herself almost as easily as he had almost destroyed her, he was good. She was on the verge of opening the door to begin here grudging forgiveness act when she heard another sigh. She knew that she would have forgiven him then and there, but he didn't. Thinking it the right moment to open the door Raven reached to do so, but it seemed he hadn't finished yet, it seemed it was all coming out now.
"What I said, what I said was wrong, I had no right to say such a thing to you, you saved my life tonight, I know that without you I would be lying dead somewhere in the city. For that I will never be able to repay you, I have not conducted myself as a gentleman should, and for that I beg your forgiveness, please call upon my services at any point in time for any task you should possibly desire, I am your humble servant, from here until such a time that I bore you."
Raven shook her head in wonder, it seemed it had been right to wait to open the door, having a personal slave could be amusing after all. She smiled then put on her stern but emotionless face, and pulled up her hood moving silently to the door as she did so.
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Still no answer, well that wasn't good. He had used all but his last resort, and he really didn't want to use that. Either she really wasn't there and he had been wasting his breath or she was absolutely in no mood to forgive him. Either way the whole affair was beginning to look pointless. Suddenly and with speed that made him jump the door opened all the way to reveal Raven, standing stock still completely covered by her cloak only revealing the small amount of her face that wasn't in shadow, and her eyes bright and piercing despite the darkness. At this sudden appearance Chris flinched turned his head away and closed his eyes expecting the long awaited attack to come now. Although he could not see it Raven raised an eyebrow at his reaction. When no killing blow came he opened one eye to see her still standing there looking at him with no trace of emotion on her partially hidden but still pretty face.
"Er, right then, ok, I, er, I'm really sorry about what I said and how I said it and all that."
He said in a somewhat fearful voice. He guessed that she had not opened the door to get rid of him or she would have done it already, so he surmised that he had struck the mark with his last attempt. He decided to continue along those lines.
"So as I was saying, um, please forgive me, I'll do anything, honest."
With this he smiled and put his right hand up in front of his shoulder while putting his left on an invisible book, like he was swearing in court. Raven continued to look impassively at him.
"Er."
He said out loud while desperately trying to find a way around saying what he really didn't want to say.
"Well then, er, is there anything you wish for me to do, anything at all, after all I really do owe you big-time."
Inwardly Chris damned himself for exposing himself so utterly to the dark girl before him. What was he thinking, sure I should apologise but this is just stupid, he thought to himself as he waited for a response. None came. Oh no, oh no, oh bleeding no, flashed through his mind as he realised that she wanted more, much more, and he would give it. He knew, and so did she.
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Now she had him. It was perfect, not only was he apologising, which was nice, but he was now being forced to humiliate himself in front of her, not to mention he had virtually signed his life over to her. She smiled inwardly as the thoughts of all the embarrassing things she could make him do in front of the others to return the favour flooded her mind. She wouldn't, she knew, but he didn't.
"Please forgive me."
He said kneeling like some chanting monk.
"Perhaps."
She said in a cold but obviously amused voice. At this response his head shot up and he grinned like a Cheshire cat.
"Well that's a start."
He said still smiling although with a look of wariness to his eyes now, as he realised just what that simple one worded answer could entail.
"So, er, you're not going to er, like hit me or anything, are you?"
At this Raven actually smiled, and Chris saw it and smiled back. This time she noticed it was an actual happy, or perhaps relived smile, and not another of his false grins.
"No, not yet at least."
Chris looked happy and seemed to grow a few inches before Raven's eyes. Just why it hadn't occurred to Raven before she didn't know, but Chris seemed and looked highly comical, what with his oversized T-shirt, his bruised face and his rather peculiar expressions. While she would never tell him, she had to admit that he was someone that she could quite like, as a friend, she added quickly to herself.
"So, are we alright then?"
Chris said with a hopeful tone to his voice.
"Just about."
She replied while nodding, now content with Chris's apology, and subsequent humiliation.
"Excellent, Beast Boy owes me a tenner then."
Chris said with a grin, his eyes however never abandoning their silent vigil on Raven, as if he expected to be attacked at any moment. Raven raised an eyebrow at his response and inwardly marvelled at how anybody who moments ago had been a complete wreck full of apologies and regrets could now be apparently happy, not to mention the fact that he had actual bet on whether she would forgive him or not. She made a note to herself to make him suffer slightly for doing so and then decided that with this new start between them they may as well go and get some breakfast; after all she thought to herself it was almost 7:00AM.
"Lets get some breakfast, the others should have turned up by now, you may as well meet everyone."
She said her normally grim emotionless voice having returned now. Chris nodded enthusiastically and gave a spectacular curtsey, indicating as he did so that Raven should lead the way. She sighed, raised an eyebrow and then smacked him across the back of the head as she passed him.
"None of this in front of the others, ok."
She stopped and delivered a chilling look that had Chris nodding in agreement without even meaning to.
"Yes Miss Raven."
He said in a school class voice, she shook her head and continued walking, he caught up and fell into step a few paces along.
"Soooooooooo, what can you tell me about the other Titans I am yet to meet, or yourself, if you are willing."
Raven continued to walk as if she hadn't heard him, inside however she was pondering to herself just what it would be right to disclose, better to play it safe and say nothing she told herself.
"Why do you want to know?"
She asked hoping to stall for time while they came ever closer towards the main room.
"Just curious that's all; Beast Boy and Cyborg aren't the very best at giving clear details, to be honest I think they spend far too much time playing video games and watching the telly."
Raven grinned at this though Chris didn't see because she turned her head away; it seemed that Chris too shared her opinion of her fellow Titans activities. This was good she told herself, she might have actually found someone that she could have a decent conversation with. She would wait and see, it would be rather careless to start judging him this soon especially what with all that had happened in the last few hours, to them both.
"So, anything you can tell me or is everything top secret around here?"
His question brought Raven back from her thoughts.
"Just wait until you meet Robin and Starfire for yourself, it won't be long before they return, if they haven't already."
She said confident that she had ended his questions about the rest of the Titans, as a matter of fact she had, but not about the one remaining Titan.
"Well what about you then, or am I asking for a smack even just by going there?"
Raven grinned again then straightening her face looked Chris in the eyes and simply said.
"Yes."
Chris actually stopped walking for a second and then caught up again holding up his hands in mock surrender.
"Ok, sorry I asked, just want to fit in, you know."
Raven didn't look at him and continued to walk, until she stopped suddenly causing him to overtake her, why would he want to fit in? She asked herself quickly, did he intend to stay? No surely not without the others approval, but would the others approve? She didn't know so instead of trying to imagine their attitude towards this stranger she decided to say something to cover her pause.
"Well I don't know that you will, looking like that."
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"Like what?"
He replied placing his hands on his face, as if to check that it was still there. Raven didn't answer and instead just pointed behind Chris, he turned expecting to see someone, he did, but didn't recognise him. Then he took a step forward as recollection dawned across his startled face. It was him, only not the him he remembered from his few now lost photographs, as well as a hundred diner mirrors. He was now sporting twin black eyes as well as an apparently flattened nose. His attire seemed unfamiliar and all in all he simply couldn't recognise himself. This was the first chance he had had to actually see himself, and he wasn't impressed.
"How come the others didn't say anything?"
Asked Chris with a still slightly stunned voice, not taking his eyes of the reflection of the beaten face before him.
"Boys very rarely take much notice of anything when they are playing video games."
Said Raven in a voice that sounded as if the information she was conveying actually depressed her.
"But I look like a bleeding racoon!"
Shouted Chris unable to believe that he actually looked this bad, had he known he might just have stayed in bed. Raven smiled at the remark but said nothing.
"Deary me."
Said Chris finally pulling his gaze away from the window and back to the girl behind him.
"Let's go then shall we, Miss Raven."
He said walking ahead and leaving a surprised Raven standing for a few seconds before she flew a few yards to catch up.
"Oh well its not all bad."
He said with a small amount of amusement as he turned back to talk to her.
"How so?"
Asked Raven truly puzzled by the peculiar little Englishman.
"Well you know, I didn't die tonight, you saved me, you forgave me and I won a tenner of Beast Boy."
"Ah."
Said Raven not knowing exactly what else to say. She was still worried about the news she had a sneaking suspicion that she would be forced to deliver.
"My apology has been properly accepted hasn't it?"
Asked Chris a suddenly worried expression on his face.
"Yes it has."
She answered.
"Oh good."
He said turning his head back over his shoulder again.
"Well that went surprisingly well, I was fully accepting a violent response, or at least some shouting."
Said Chris as he looked over his shoulder, only to look back again when it was too late to avoid a flight of stairs that had apparently materialised from nowhere. His facial expression changed from one of mild amusement to shock and fear as his left foot suddenly found itself in a void and hurtling down rapidly. One moment of pointless balancing resistance later and he was on his way for what would prove to be a short but eventful trip.
His left leg caught on the fifth step down but this proved to be only a temporary respite as the rest of his body barged its way down the stairs like a group of rowdy sports fans. Soon there was no stopping him, back on the safety of the top step Raven watched as Chris flew towards that inevitable confrontation with physics at the bottom of the stairs. It came soon enough, with no way of stopping himself, and no help coming from the still somewhat puzzled Raven Chris resigned himself to the pain he knew was coming and simply closed his eyes. His shoulder viciously caught the corner of the wall as he reached the bottom thus spinning him round, it was this factor that saved his battered ribs another heavy frontal impact, however with hindsight that may have been better as flying backwards into the opposite wall his head cracked heavily on the concrete, there was a distinctive hollow knocking sound, and then for the third time in eight hours Chris slipped into a blow induced unconscious state. As he slid down the wall, through his rapidly greying vision he could just make out Raven casually stepping down the stairs in no particular hurry. Just as he slipped below the waves of unconsciousness he heard Raven say.
"Really Chris, you really are a remarkable little chap."
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There you go, anybody still reading this far that isn't David or Simon please R&R, your opinions matter a great deal to me, so feel free to tear my work to pieces.
