Chapter Twenty-Six
Never would I have ever believed that Padmé would be capable of even considering ending her own life, but I wasn't mistaken in what I'd seen. I told Jobal and Ruwee about the scene I happened upon, and both of them thanked me repeatedly and suggested how lucky I was to have shown up at the right time.
Luck had nothing to do with it. As soon as I had set my ship down, the Force had urged me to hurry. I had literally ran from the Theed spaceport to the plaza at assisted speed and stopped her just before she'd made the biggest mistake of her life.
Never again, I vowed. Never again would I leave her to deal with such emotional upheaval as she'd been experiencing. I didn't care if it meant dragging her along on missions with me. I would do what I had to in order to keep her safe.
And now, all I could do was wait and meditate. I wasn't about to sleep and risk her slipping away from me again. The family physician had already come and gone and had no idea how to help. He'd believed she had simply become overwhelmed and suffered a mental break. All she needed was rest and fluids.
I knew there was more to it than that. She hadn't been herself ever since our visit with Bant, almost as if the fight had literally gone out of her. I had to find some way to bring it back.
Hours passed while I waited, worried, and tried to meditate. I didn't allow myself to go too deep, however, because I wanted to be ready to come back if Padmé did wake up. Jobal offered food and drink but I refused. Regardless of whether she wanted me there or not, I wasn't moving, I'd decided.
That is until Ruwee stepped into the room to inform me that someone by the name of Yoda was trying to find me and was waiting on the comm.
He had better not be sending me on a mission! I had formally requested time off and it had been granted! I wasn't the only capable or available Jedi!
Hesitantly, I went downstairs and accepted the transmission. Indeed, it was Master Yoda's holographic form that appeared. He began by apologizing for interrupting my holiday, which he knew this wasn't.
"A tremor in the Force there has been," he informed me.
I wouldn't know. I'd been too distracted to feel much of anything, although I wasn't about to admit that.
Was this really why he had tracked me down? To discuss the mysterious workings of the Force? I wanted to tell him I didn't have time for this when actually all I had at the moment was time. But it was time meant for Padmé, not the Jedi.
"And?" I asked, struggling to remain calm.
"Focused upon an individual it is," the ancient Master continued. "On your way back, stop by the planet Tatooine you will and investigate this occurrence."
Was he serious?
"Master Yoda, I don't have any idea how long I'll be on Naboo, but I was planning on spending at least the entire week." Or more if required, I told myself.
"Trust in the Force, you should. Some help to you and the Senator, this may be."
I released my growing frustrations into Force. At least, I tried.
"I'll meditate on the matter," I answered bluntly in a manner most of the council members did whenever they didn't know what else to say. "Kenobi out."
I ended the transmission abruptly and scrubbed my scalp with aggravation just before hearing voices drifting down the stairwell.
Typical. I had sat by her bedside for hours waiting and the second I leave, she wakes up.
Flying up to her room, I found Jobal sitting next to the bed. They were speaking quietly. Although I was doing my best not to listen, I'd heard my name mentioned.
"I'll be downstairs if you need me," the older woman announced before placing a tender kiss to Padmé's brow. She then stepped around me and out the door, leaving the two of us alone.
Slowly, I approached and sat down, although Padmé hadn't yet looked at me. She was studying the textures of her bed coverings and seemed hesitant to speak. I was hoping the experience had perhaps caused her to finally open her eyes, but her mood was unchanged.
"Why?" I asked her, a simple one-worded question that I desperately wanted an answer to.
Her head moved while her fingers toyed with a loose string, although finally after a while, she did respond.
"I want you to return to Coruscant," she said with as much strength she could muster.
I don't know who she was trying to convince, her or me, but it hadn't worked.
"I won't."
My refusal lifted her eyes, which were red-rimmed and wide. "I'm going back to the sea," she informed me. "Just as soon as Bant comes up with an anecdote."
That was her choice.
"Then I'm coming with you," I told her, which only caused her brows to lower in confusion.
"No you're not," she argued back.
"I most certainly am, and there's nothing you can do to stop me."
She gazed at me for a moment, most likely trying to figure out if I were serious or not. I actually was, but I'd let her be the judge of that.
"I'm not going to let you give up your life as a Jedi. Besides, you're not even a good swimmer."
In opposition to her own, my brows lifted high, while the corners of my mouth lifted slightly. "I'll admit I can't keep up with you Mer, but I can get some artificial fins of my own, you know. They do make those."
She gazed at me skeptically, but the ice was broken and I was glad. I smiled and reached for her hand, which I was relieved to discover she accepted. Hope was not lost.
And then it hit me. Literally. Nearly knocked me off my chair actually. A tremor? That was more like a full-on quake! I had never experienced such a strong ripple in the Force before.
"Are you okay?" Padmé asked and I realized I must've physically shuddered.
How could I explain this to her?
"There's a disturbance in the Force. Master Yoda contacted me earlier to tell me about it, but I just felt it myself."
"What does that mean?"
As usual, she was curious about the things I could sense and I always tried my best to explain them in a way she could understand.
"When there's an event in the galaxy, either cosmic, natural, or unnatural in some cases, it creates a ripple. Like dropping a stone into the water. Depending upon its location, sometimes the effect is delayed or weakened to the point I can't feel it. This disturbance was quite strong and if Master Yoda hadn't already located its source, I would guess it had occurred fairly close by."
"Where did he say it came from?"
It was good to see her interested in something else other than her own grief. In fact, it was good for both of us. Perhaps Yoda was right. This event may be a healthy distraction and I had a strong feeling that rest isn't what she needed. Activity to get her mind off her troubles would be a good idea.
"Tatooine," I answered her, which caused her to wrinkle her nose in disgust.
"Yuck. I hate sand. That planet is so dry. It doesn't feel right."
Of course, it didn't to someone who grew up in the water. "We won't be there long," I promised her.
"We?"
There was no question about it. She was going with me even if I had to drag her to the ship.
"I want you to come with me."
For a second, I saw a flash of fear cross her face, which was not usual for her. She trusted me. I had never given her reason not to, so I imagined it was due to the thought of leaving the comfort of Jobal's home.
"I promise I'll take good care of you," I said, daring to reach out and caress the skin of her arm.
She grinned timidly and was thoughtful for a moment. "I know you will. I'm just not sure I'm ready."
"Padmé," I told her throatily, placing both my hands on either side of her face. "You are the strongest woman I know. You'll survive this and one day soon begin to feel normal again. Besides, you're not the only one to be impacted by this tragedy. I feel the loss as if someone is twisting a vibroblade in my gut. It's overwhelming at times, but somewhere in the Force, that little podling is watching over us."
I could tell the thought had never occurred to her and her eyes brightened slightly. "You believe that?"
"Of course," I said, and I meant it. Our child would've been strong in the Force. From early on, I'd been able to tell, although I'd never said anything. "There is no death, only the Force."
"All right," she said, another beautiful and hopeful grin appearing. It was a good sign, although I realized we still had a long way to go.
