Disclaimer: I own neither Firefly, nor Durkheim's theory of totemism in The Elementary Forms of Religious Life.

Spoilers: The tiniest one for Ariel.

A/N: An Easter fic (I'm still in time for Orthodox Easter!). And yes, I have lost my mind. Please comment/review!

River was staring at him again.

Although this was a common occurrence, Book didn't see anything fascinating about his dinner, but maybe she was just focusing to avoid something, or someone else.

"Are you enjoying your ritual sacrifice?"

"What?" The crew had stumbled across a slab of cheap and edible meat while planetside yesterday. Book had reserved his portion for today, wanting to commemorate the day. He kept track, as best he could, of holy days. However, without Earth That Was's moon's rotation, it made it difficult to track some days.

As all this passed through the Shepherd's mind before River replied, he noticed Jayne moving around the table to stand at his right, in a protective position.

"Your ritual sacrifice of lamb."

"It's just my supper."

"No. Durkheim theorized on the sacrifice of the sacred. I know what you're doing."

"Riv-"

"Huh? She gonna take your food and stab it or somethin'? 'Cause she ain't allowed near no knives."

"You are celebrating what your book of lies calls the Resurrection of the Christ. He is sacred to you."

"Yes, but you needn't trouble yourself, I've already promised Mal I won't preach to you on it."

"We done talked about it this morning, anyhows. But I don't much see what this has to do with Crazy talkin' bout killin'. Makin' me twitchy."

"Not murder, totemism. You call your Christ, 'The Lamb of God.' Today, to celebrate the mystical feast, you ingest him, the lamb, in hopes of what? Reconnecting with the fellow sheep? Taking on his holiness or his powers? She does not think this will allow this Shepherd-man to walk on water, but she would like to watch him attempt it. The girl is curious and wishes to know to what purpose you engage in this act of totemism."

"Hell, you start turning water into wine, and the Cap'n might let you pray at meals."

Book's head hit the table.