Chapter VII – Searching for the Shadow

"The bird is hiding something."

I glanced up from making repairs on my damaged leg, not a little startled at Fett's declaration. He had been his usual quiet self for the past few days, so this was a surprise.

"What do you mean?" I inquired.

Fett, who had been laying down and taking a rest from the day's activity, struggled to a sitting-up position and gazed at me across the snapping fire. "You wear the ring. If it's so powerful, can't you sense it? Something's not right about that bird, and she's not telling us."

"Not like any bird I've seen," Nightwind put in, still licking his fangs from his recent forage for meat. "Doesn't smell right either. A little like cold embers, but nothing else. Not anything I recognize."

"And how many birds talk?" Jessa piped up from where she crouched on a tree limb, her tattered cloak and hunched-over pose giving her an uncanny resemblance to a cadaverous scavenger bird. "Sure, some'll repeat what they hear, but one that actually communicates – and that we can all understand, not just you? Come on, even in your guys' galaxy, that can't be too common."

"Maybe she's a new species," Luke suggested as he finished warming the ration trays and doled them out to Tuck and Fett. "There are plenty of intelligent aliens that resemble animals."

"All the same," said Tuck, looking up from unrolling a bedroll, "let's talk to her. Yes, she saved our lives. Yes, we're in her debt. But we still need to make sure she's not a threat."

I reconnected a final wire, then pulled my boot over my leg to hide the components. "And if I confront the bird, what do you expect me to do? She is the seventh member of our group. The ring confirms it. Can we really turn her away or destroy her if she proves to be a danger?"

"Probably not," Luke acknowledged. "But we can use caution…"

The conversation died as the subject of our discussion landed in the clearing. She lowered her head and dropped something at my feet – a cluster of plants pulled up by their roots.

"For your friend the hunter." She spoke with the grace of a queen, yet there was a peculiar tiredness in her voice, an aged quality as if she were an old woman. "Wash them well, cut them up roots and all, and brew them with some sweetener. It will ease his pain and help him sleep through the night."

Tuck retrieved the herbs and complied. I had to wonder, however. How did a bird learn so much about healing and medicinal plants? Not to mention other things…

When the bird had attacked our captors, we had taken advantage of their distraction and fled, leaving all our gear behind. The day had been spent in hiding and retreat as the irate men and women trailed us through the woods, intent on recapturing us, only to be driven back time and again by our strange defender. By they had finally given up the chase and departed, it was dusk, and our exhausted party retired to the nearest clearing to scrounge together whatever camp we could…

…only to find a welcoming fire awaiting us, and the mysterious bird regarding us from her perch atop our neatly stacked supplies.

I studied her carefully for the first time. As tall as a three-year-old child, with the deep chest and hooked beak and talons of a bird of prey, her amber eyes flashed and sparkled, fierce one moment and gentle the next. A crest of feathers crowned her head, and a train of long tail feathers trailed behind her. Her plumage was generally a nondescript medium brown, though here and there one could catch a hint of faded scarlet or blue, as if she had been painted and the paint was coming away in chips. She may have been a beautiful creature at one time, but now she looked ragged and worn, dust filming her plumage and both crest and tail feathers frayed and broken in places.

"I sense," she said at length, "you have questions for me?" She cocked her head to one side inquisitively.

"Yes," I replied. "Who are you? Why did you help us? And how did you start a fire and retrieve our supplies on your own?"

She ducked her head under one wing – not to hide in shame or embarrassment, but to rearrange the feathers to suit her liking. "I suppose the last question is the easiest… and the answer is that my kind are, by nature, very strong and capable of carrying huge loads. And we have an intuitive understanding of fire." She busied herself with preening, as if expecting us to be satisfied with that answer.

"You haven't finished," rasped Fett. "Who are you?"

"More importantly, WHAT are you?" demanded Jessa.

She lifted her head and gave us a regal gaze. "I suppose there can be no harm in telling it to you… after all, one of you wears the fabled unicorn ring…"

What did that have to do with anything? But before I could voice that question, an incredible metamorphosis took place.

The bird spread her wings, and an amazing change came over her. A metallic sheen spread over her plumage, plumage that was no longer tatty and brown, but whole and shining with luster, glowing with every color of the rainbow. She seemed to swell to twice her size, giving off the radiance of a small star, sparks of color swirling about her like chips of jewels…

"Wow, she's beautiful," breathed Luke.

"Pretty," marveled Nightwind.

"HOLY SITH!" screeched Jessa, and promptly fell out of her tree. Actually, the word she used wasn't "Sith," but I was too fascinated by the bird's sudden transformation to listen closely.

The bird folded herself away again, fading back to brown. "Sorry," she said weakly. "I can't hold it as long as I used to. What you saw is how I looked when I was younger…"

"Sonofa…" Jessa grumbled, hauling herself to her feet. "The frickin' bird's a phoenix!"

"A what?" Tuck demanded.

"Phoenix," Jessa repeated. "They're immortal birds of Chinese and Greek mythology… um, okay, so not a myth exactly… they live for five hundred years, then burst into flame and are reborn from the ashes. Or so the stories go."

Luke frowned. "That seems weird."

"No more unusual than the ring," Tuck pointed out.

I realized my mouth was hanging open, and I snapped it shut, though seeing as I wore a mask I suppose it wasn't that big a deal. Not just a bird, but a creature of everlasting life! Never, in a hundred lifetimes, could I have guessed that an immortal would be the seventh!

"Your friend is correct," the bird said wearily. "I am a phoenix. And yes, we are immortal… if we choose to be."

I found my voice at last. "What do you mean?"

"If we elect to be born again, we must build a pyre and burn ourselves upon it when we reach the five hundredth year of live in our present incarnation. Of course, immortality is not synonymous with invincibility – we can be killed, though we usually generate a new body and live again." Her feathers bristled, and she gave herself a vigorous shake. "But if one does not wish to continue life, they can forego the burning ritual… and fade away naturally."

I understood the hidden message behind her explanation. "And you wish to take the latter path?"

"I am old, Vader," she replied, closing her golden eyes. "Older than the Old Republic, older than the Jedi Order. My kind was old when man's dream of traveling the stars was just that – a dream, nothing more. I have existed for millennia. I have seen entire civilizations rise, thrive, blaze in a moment of glory, and crumble to ruin. The Empire's reign was a mere day and evening, the Galactic Civil War a heartbeat of twilight. I am old, tired, worn. To one such as I, oblivion would be a welcome rest."

I heard Luke murmur something that sounded like "And I thought Yoda was old."

But Nightwind was confused. "Why would someone want to die? Makes no sense."

Her eyes opened, and her head jerked around to regard the acklay. "I know it is difficult for mortals to understand. But don't you realize, young creature, how lucky you are? Your life is all the more glorious for its temporal nature, just as a summer's day is all the more precious for the knowledge that tomorrow will come the storms of winter. Mortals long for the secret to eternal life, but they don't realize the consequences of such knowledge. Can you truly imagine outliving everything you hold dear – friends, loved ones, nations, ideals, causes? No." Her eyes took on a faraway look. "I have lived far longer than most. I have even outlived many of my fellow immortals. I have no desire to prolong my life. My current five hundred years ends in a little more than a year, and then I can rest. Until then…" She nodded in my direction. "I have a feeling the six of you need me."

I returned the gesture. "We would be honored if you would join us, Lady Phoenix."

"Ash," she corrected. "Call me Ash. No formalities, please."

"Very well, Ash," I amended. "Welcome."

"To the Fellowship of the Ring," Jessa quipped, then snorted with laughter at a joke no one else understood but the phoenix.

"Good one, young lady," Ash said, eyes dancing with laughter. "Now, I have told you my story. Perhaps you will tell me yours?"

So once again we related the tale of how we had met, gathered, and traveled. She listened attentively, giving an annoyed hiss when I mentioned the Emperor but otherwise quiet. She seemed to know of the ring already, making an explanation unnecessary.

"I have been following your party for awhile now, you know," she said at length. "I felt a pull toward you, as if I were to join you and guide you. And now that I know your story and desires, I think I know how to help all of you."

Nightwind glanced up from grooming his foreclaws. Fett propped himself up on one elbow to listen. Even Jessa was silent.

"Magicians of all calibers exist in this galaxy of ours," she explained. "They have stayed hidden in recent times, avoiding society in general for fear of being destroyed as Jedi or witches. I have had contact with a few of them over the centuries… and of all of them, I think the one who is your greatest hope is the one known as the Shadow."

"The Shadow?" repeated Luke. "That's an odd name."

"Many wizards take on grandiose titles to flaunt their seniority," Ash explained. "The Ancient, the Old One, the Antiquity, the Ageless One, the Timeless Sage, to name a few. The Shadow opted for a name not tied to her immortality, partly because she is far younger than most of her compatriots, but mostly because she finds such age-related names ridiculous."

"Good for her," Jessa said.

"Where can we find the Shadow?" asked Tuck excitedly. "Is she here, on this planet?"

"She is wherever she is needed," Ash said cryptically. "Tuck, the tea is ready. Give it to Fett quickly, for it loses its potency when it cools too much."

I remembered my dream, the silver-robed woman, and her order to find her. So this woman was a sorceress, and she had a name – the Shadow. And she had been correct – the seventh member of our group indeed knew how to find her.

Part of me felt incalculable relief that our wanderings were finally over, that our journey finally had a destination. But another part of me felt strangely apprehensive, somehow knowing that the Shadow would not prove to be the end of our quest.

The ring pulsed softly. It seemed to know what lay ahead, but it was not forthcoming with that information. Which was just as well, for if I had know, would I have continued any farther?

Break…

Misfortune befell us the very next day, and the journey only worsened from that point on.

"Someone tell the droid to stop singing!" Fett bellowed, his annoyance having reached critical mass. "She's driving me insane!"

"First off, I'm a cyborg, not a droid," Jessa pointed out. "Get it right. Second, what's wrong with enjoying a few tunes…"

"A few!" he repeated in an exasperated shriek. "You haven't shut up since dawn! I've heard that blasted 'American Pie' fifty times now…"

"I've only sung it twice, you liar!"

"And that's two times too many!"

"Fett, cool it," Luke advised, beginning to sound like a parent calming down two bickering siblings. "She's not doing anything to hurt you. And Jessa, if the pie song annoys him, sing something else. It's not worth the hassle."

She grumbled something obscene before launching into song again. "Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl…"

"No, please!" screamed Tuck, clamping his hands on his helmet as if to cover his ears. "Anything but that!"

"Why are y'all so picky anyhow?" complained Jessa.

"Quiet!" I ordered. "Ash is returning."

The phoenix had flown ahead to ascertain that we were on the correct path and to search out any possible obstacles. She landed atop Nightwind's load and folded her wings. "The good news is that we are on the right track."

"The bad news?"

"Over the next hill is a broad river, lying directly across our path. We have no choice but to find a way across."

"Is there a visible means of crossing?"

"I saw no boat or bridge. But it's not too deep, we can ford it."

Nightwind whimpered. "Don't like water."

I do not know what Ash considered deep, and I'm not sure I want to know. The dark green waters that blocked our way certainly did not fit my definition of "not too deep." Heavy rains and mountain runoff had swollen the river until it threatened to burst its banks. I considered a moment, then ordered Jessa to scout further downstream for a better crossing sight and Luke to look upstream for the same.

"Rapids downstream," Jessa reported on her return. "No chance there."

"As deep as ever my way," Luke replied.

"I have already ascertained that this is the best crossing site," said Ash, sounding a little annoyed that we had questioned her observations. "The water is deep, but not deep enough to hamper the acklay…"

"Don't like water," Nightwind repeated.

"…so if he were to cross first, deposit the baggage on shore, then come back for the rest of us, we could manage."

Luke shrugged. "I don't have any better ideas, so let's give it a shot."

"Don't like water," Nightwind insisted, digging his spike-legs into the ground.

"There is no other way," I told him. "We have to cross if we are to find the Shadow, and you are our only hope."

It took a great deal of persuasion to convince him to cross, and even then he moaned and grumbled as he minced into the river. Rushing water gurgled about his legs, swiftly rising to his belly as he waded further out. He gazed back at us with the expression of one imparting a vast favor at incredible personal expense.

"Good boy!" encouraged Jessa. "Keep going, you're halfway there…"

But by the halfway point he was buried in the rushing liquid up to the shoulders. The press of the current shoved against our supplies (thankfully wrapped in watertight material) and pushed the poor acklay off-balance. His black eyes flashed in sudden terror as he lost his footing on the slick rocks and muck of the riverbed – his legs were horribly unsuited for grasping anything – and the merciless river swept him downstream.

The ring seemed to explode on my hand, sending fire through my veins.

"No!" shouted Luke and Jessa at the same time.

"Help me!" cried Nightwind.

I swore loudly and ran after the beleaguered acklay. Stang it all! Not now! We couldn't lose him! It was far more than the loss of our supplies that drove me – Nightwind had become a friend, part of our oddball, thrown-together "family," and I could not let him drown!

Evidently Luke had the same thought, for he was right on my heels. Tuck went one better, though – he plunged into the murky waters and swam after Nightwind, at last catching his lead. But there was no possible way one man could pull the creature to shore, and he was dragged swiftly downstream with the beast.

I do not know exactly what happened next, only that all of us were in the water, oblivious to personal danger as we struggled to push and pull each other to shore. I remember Nightwind's howls of terror, Tuck's sudden shout of pain, the lurch of the current as it dragged us pitilessly through the rapids, the stab of the ring, an enormous crushing weight…

I awoke to find myself drenched to the bone, lying facedown in the mud, with the ring burning brightly and Ash pecking at my helmet.

"Wake up," she urged. "The others need you."

I pulled myself to my feet. "What happened?"

"Nightwind rolled on top of you when he flipped in the rapids," Jessa explained, wringing water from her almost-totally-shredded cloak. "We thought you were dead at first, but Ash saw you were breathing…"

The ring's fire subsided. Had it played a role in saving my life? By all accounts I should have been drowned or crushed to death…

A moan brought me back to my senses. The others were strewn along the shoreline like so much flotsam washed up in the current. Luke was on his hands and knees, coughing up water, his cheek scraped and bloody from a collision with a rock. Fett sprawled on his back in the mud, arms and legs akimbo, looking as if he wouldn't want to be anywhere else but there. Tuck lay on his side, curled in a fetal position, groaning and clutching his left shoulder. Nightwind shivered nearby, legs tucked beneath him and eyes glazed. And our supplies…

"Gone," Jessa said soberly. "Washed downstream. All of them."

"I'm deeply sorry," Ash told me, dipping her head in great shame. "I thought for sure… but even immortals are not infallible, I'm afraid."

I went to Luke first. "Are you all right, son?"

"I'll be fine," he said hoarsely, stifling another bout of coughing. "Tuck's not, though…"

"Dislocated my shoulder," Tuck grunted. "Think you can… argh… fix it?"

"I can try," I replied, though truth be told, first aid was not my specialty. I placed my left hand on his shoulder, feeling him tremble and flinch with pain. Immediately I sensed that there was too much damage for the ring to handle alone, but how to lessen that damage…

Then the ring chimed in with a strange prompting.

"Luke, get me a stick," I ordered, pulling off Tuck's shoulder armor.

"A stick?"

"The diameter of your thumb or thicker. And quickly!"

Luke handed me a piece of driftwood, which I gave to Tuck. "Bite it," I ordered. "This is going to hurt."

He caught on at once and clamped the wood in his teeth. "Ready."

Closing my eyes, I pictured in my mind where I wanted the disordered bones to go, then, with a sharp but cautious wrench, popped the bone back into the socket. Tuck screamed through his clenched teeth, but thankfully he did not exacerbate the situation by jerking away. Touching the ring to his shoulder a final time to speed the healing, I replaced his armor.

"Use caution with that arm until it heals," I ordered.

"Will do," he moaned.

"Now what?" groaned Fett, not moving.

Now what indeed? Our food, our medical equipment, our shelter, our bedding materials, everything had been lost to the rapids. The others could forage off the land if the need arose, I supposed, but Jessa and I were in worse straits. My internal components, though complex, were hardy, and I could go perhaps a week, two at most, without medical attention. But Jessa had mentioned that she would need medical assistance in a few weeks time as well, and if the journey to find the Shadow took any longer…

"We go on," Luke declared. "We find the Shadow. We have no other choice."

Nightwind only keened miserably.

Break…

That evening we reached the edge of the woods – and a wind-scoured, virtually plantless plain that stretched in an expanse of hard gray earth as far as the eye could see. The ground was littered with stones like the scattered bones of beasts, and the sky above was equally hard and gray with scuds of darker-gray clouds. And the wind… it clawed at our clothes, blasted silt into our faces, pressed at us in an effort to bowl us over. It was as if the wind had joined us as an unwelcome guest, battering, tormenting, obscuring the path.

As if to make restitution for his failure at the river, Nightwind left the group often to hunt for food, giving most of it to the others. I am sure that the food was often more trouble than it was worth – any fire built in this storm struggled to survive and either barely cooked the meat or charred it, and more often than not the food was crusted in grit thanks to the brutal elements. But Luke, Tuck, and Fett were past caring and ate it anyway, though the exclusively carnivorous diet and liberal seasoning of dirt wreaked havoc with their digestive tracts.

Days passed. The food dwindled to almost nothing as game became scarce. Sleep was nigh impossible thanks to the wind and rocky ground, and everyone became edgy and miserable from exhaustion. Luke developed a bad cough that would not abate, Tuck's shoulder refused to heal, Fett grew steadily weaker, Ash looked older and more tattered by the day, Nightwind lost weight at an alarming rate, Jessa's joints were so full of grit she found it increasingly difficult to move, and my entire body ached in protest as the journey took its toll. Yet we stubbornly pressed on, forcing ourselves to take one more step, cross one more rise, trek one more kilometer…

Fett was the first to fall. I hauled him to his feet, and he nodded once in generous (for him) thanks and limped onward. Luke stumbled and fell, catching himself on Tuck's arm, and the trooper helped him regain his balance. Once even I felt my strength suddenly flee, and only Nightwind's muzzle against my chest saved me from collapsing.

The second time Fett collapsed, he refused to get up. I solved the problem by throwing him over Nightwind's shoulders. The fiercely independent hunter's pride won out, and two minutes later he was walking again.

But not long afterward, Tuck fell to his knees. "I can't do this anymore," he moaned. "Go on without me…"

"What kind of talk is that?" demanded Luke. "No one's getting left behind. Come on!"

But Nightwind had had enough too. "I can't go on! I quit! Somebody shoot me, I'm starving and I hurt and I'm tired…"

"We must continue on together," I told them, but not without sympathy. "We must stand together if our quest is to succeed…"

"Screw the quest!" Jessa cut in savagely. "Screw the galaxy, screw the Shadow, and screw you!" She curled in a ball and buried her faceplate in her knee joints. "My eyes hurt, I can barely move, my tank's running on empty… I just wanna go home…"

"We have to go on," Ash told them. "There is an end to the journey, I promise."

They didn't seem convinced, but in the end they resignedly got to their feet and trudged on.

At last, my own spirit gave out. I knelt in the dust and shut out the pleas and arguments of the others and the frantic stab of the ring. It was all too much. I hurt so badly, I was so exhausted, and even if we made it to the Shadow, what then? I had no future. I was a fugitive, a vagabond, rejected by all but my son. I would be doing Luke and myself – not to mention the galaxy – a great favor by simply fading into oblivion as Ash wished to do…

"Take heart, my friends! I'm coming!"

That voice… it was at once gentle, wise, firm, and oddly alien. Not the Shadow's voice, I knew that much, for this voice was male…

I lifted my head. In the distance a flare of color could be seen, growing larger and taking definite shape as it zigzagged closer. Four legs could be seen, a head, a brilliant plumed tail…

All exhaustion was forgotten in an instant at the sight. Fragments began clicking into place – the being in silver robes, the rainbow beast, the windstorm… the terrible tempest and mysterious travelers on Corusant the week of my birth…

I was witnessing a legend come to life.